Jess turns another page in his book as he half-heartedly listens to Dean and Lane talk at lunch. A while back, Dean had coaxed Jess out of his hiding place in the library and had him start eating lunch in the cafeteria with him and Lane. Majority of the time Jess just sits across from them with a book or homework, only joining the conversation if it's something that piques his interests. Today they're talking about Sookie and Jackson's upcoming wedding, so The Odyssey it is for him.

A table over they hear an obnoxious laugh, causing Lane rolls her eyes. "God, I hate that guy. Chuck thinks he's so cool just because he won some bet that he could kiss every girl in our grade before the end of the school year."

Jess, unfortunately, vividly remembers Chuck. The fight at the beginning of the year that Dean had tried to break up and caused them to get off on the wrong foot was with that prick. He glances up from his book. "Last I checked, you're a girl in our grade. I thought you had better taste in guys than that loser."

Lane scoffs. "Trust me, I do. The jerk has been trying to get a kiss out of me for a full week before just giving up and cornering me last period. I'm still trying to get the taste of his mouth off mine, dude seriously needs a breath mint."

"Wait, he kissed you without your permission?"

"How do you think he won the bet? Two-thirds of the girls refused to kiss him so he just kissed them anyway."

Jess closes his book. "And he hasn't gotten in trouble? Not even a detention?"

Lane shrugs. "Guess not. I know a few girls have told on him, but the only thing they ever get told is that 'boys will be boys'."

"That's bullshit."

Dean has a disgusted look on his face. "I agree, but there's nothing we can do." At the look on Jess's face, Dean gives him a look. "Jess, no. Whatever you're thinking, don't do it. You're barely making it to senior year as it is, don't give the school any more reason to hold you back."

"Seriously, Jess, it's not a big deal."

Jess ignores them as he stands up.

Dean stands quickly, blocking his way. "Jess, stop. You can't get in anymore fights."

He holds his hands up. "I'm not going to fight him, I'm just gonna talk." Jess slips past Dean, making a beeline for Chuck. "Hey, Chuck, can we talk for a minute?"

Lane stays seated, face hidden in her hands, as Dean stands still, ready to jump in at a moments notice.

Chuck smirks at his friends before standing up and getting in his face. "What'd ya want, Mariano? Here to write my book report like you do for Forester?"

Jess chuckles. "Real funny, you should be a comedian. With your grades, you'll get into clown school just fine. No, I'm here to teach you something. How it feels when someone does something without your consent."

"Yeah? And how do you-" The whole cafeteria goes silent as Jess cuts off Chuck by pulling him into a deep kiss. And Jess really goes for it. He doesn't care what people think of him, but Chuck sure as hell does, so he makes sure to make a full production out of this. He grips his hands in Chuck's hair, adds some tongue… give him an Oscar, because by the whistle he just heard he's doing a pretty good job of selling this.

Chuck stays frozen in shock for about a full five seconds before he snaps out of it and pushes Jess off of him. "What the fuck, you freak?!" He yells as he wipes his mouth.

Jess laughs, barely managing to stay upright. "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were into that. Or is it only when you're leading, because if that's the case, I'm not picky-" He doesn't get to finish his sentence as Chuck pins him to the ground and punches him right in the face. He tries to curl up and protect himself from any more punches when he feels Chuck be lifted off him.

Jess opens his eyes to see Chuck struggling to break free from the security guard's grasp as he's being dragged away. "You're gonna pay for this, you little fag!"

Dean and Lane are by his side in an instant, helping him sit up. "Oh my god, Jess, are you okay?"

"What were you thinking, man?"

Jess waves them both off, his eye throbbing. "I never fought him. He attacked me." He makes sure to say first thing.

Despite that, a teacher still ushers him to a nurse to get his eye looked at before sending him to the principal's office. He holds an ice pack to his eye as he waits outside for Luke to show up. Luke comes running in, spotting him right away.

"I never threw a punch, not even to defend myself. Chuck did all the-"

"I don't care about that, Jess." Luke says in a rush as he crouches down in front of him. "Are you okay? Lemme see that eye." Without even waiting, Luke gently pulls the ice pack away to get a look at his eye, using his other hand to hold his chin and move his face more into the light. Luke sucks in a breath. "Man, he really got you good, you're gonna have a black eye for awhile." He lets go so Jess can put the ice back on his eye and stands up. "That little punk is dead, you hear me? Dead." He starts pacing.

"I don't think you should be making death threats in a school. They tend to take those pretty seriously here." Jess tries to lighten the mood a little.

Luke ignores him as he continues pacing. "And he's banned from the diner. Lifelong ban. I don't care if it's the last place on earth with food, he's not stepping a foot in there."

"The principal will see you both now." The secretary says, interrupting Luke.

"Thank god." Jess mutters. He's sure Luke will continue his rant later, but for now at least he gets a break. They enter the office and sit across from the principal, who is not looking very pleased.

"Why is it I keep finding you in my office, Mr. Mariano?" The principal asks, folding his hands on top of his desk.

"I can assume it's not my sunny exposition and witty humor." Luke nudges him for that.

"A better question is, why is my nephew sitting here with a black eye? I get a call that he's in the nurse's office and to come down here, but no one would tell me a damn thing over the phone." Jess can tell Luke is still in a rant mode and is barely holding back his temper.

The principal sighs. "Jess here got into an altercation with Mr. Presby in the middle of lunch."

"How many times do I have to say this? He punched me. I never so much as shoved him, and I have half the school that can back that up."

The principal raises a brow. "So he just randomly walked up to you and decided to strike you out of the blue?" He asks rhetorically. "Mr. Danes, your nephew sexually assaulted Mr. Presby, causing Chuck to lash out."

Luke's head spins over to Jess. "What?!"

Jess ignores Luke, sitting up straight in his seat. "I just kissed him! How is that sexual assault?!"

"You made an unwanted advancement on another student and that's an suspendable offence. You're lucky you're not being expelled."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"Jess, stop talking." Luke growls. He starts to stand, nudging Jess to do so as well.

"No!" Jess snaps at his uncle. He turns back to the principal. "You can't do that."

"Oh, I most certainly can, young man. You-"

Jess waves the hand not holding the ice pack. "Stop right there, I know what I did! I'm just pissed at how much of a hypocrite you and this entire school is!"

"Jess-" Luke tries to stop him again, but he just shrugs him off.

"For the entire year, Chuck has been kissing most of the girls in my grade without their permission. Lane said they stopped even bothering to come to you because you said it was just, 'boys being boys'. So why is it that I'm being punished for doing the same thing he's been getting away scot free with?" The only sound in the room is of Luke sitting back down. "Is it because we're both boys? Because it wouldn't look too well on you for prosecuting me solely on my sexual preference. Last I checked, homophobia is pretty frowned upon nowadays."

That gets his attention. "Whoa! Nobody here is homophobic."

Jess has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from laughing. "Whatever you say, I'm just not sure that's how the superintendent will see it."

He leaves it there. Jess watches as the principal weighs his options. With a final sigh, the principal stands. "It's Friday, go home for the rest of the day and come back on Monday. I hope not to see you back in my office for the rest of the year, Mr. Mariano."

Luke stands to shake his hand. "He'll be a model student, won't you, Jess?"

Jess stays seated. "Does this mean Chuck is still getting away with everything he's done the past year?"

"I can't speak about another student's punishment with you, that's between him, his parents, and me."

"So he is." Jess scoffs. "I don't know what I expected." He mutters under his breath as he stands and marches out of the room.

To Jess's shock, the walk back to the diner is a silent one. He thought for sure Luke would be mad and yelling at him for starting a fight, but instead he just looks like he's deep in thought. He surprises Jess again when he follows him up the stairs to the apartment. Maybe he just wants to yell at Jess in private? That's never stopped him before, but there's always a first time for everything.

Once upstairs, Luke pulls out a chair and gestures for him to sit without a word. He does so without a fight and bites his lip as he watches Luke sit across from him. With a heavy sigh, Luke leans back and takes off his cap, tossing it on the table. "Jess,"

Jess shifts uneasily. "Yes?" He asks when Luke doesn't continue.

"I just want you to know, you can talk to me about anything."

"Okay…?" The bag of mostly melted ice sloshes in his hand. He was going to switch it out for the bag of frozen peas in the freezer, but he got interrupted when Luke decided they had to have the most awkward conversation on the face of the planet.

Luke clears his throat. "I just mean, I'm okay with however you choose to live your life, as long as you're happy."

"Thanks? Right back at you?" Jess is pretty sure his uncle has been replaced by a pod person at this point. It's the only explanation for why he's acting so weird.

"I don't want you to think you can't bring someone special around because you're scared of how I might react. Boy or girl, I'll always accept you."

Oh. oh! Luke thinks he's? "Ah, jeez." Jess groans, putting the final piece together.

Luke mistakes his reaction for embarrassment. "I know talking isn't really our thing, and we certainly don't need to start now, I just wanted to make sure you knew you'll always be safe here."

"Luke, I'm not gay."

"Oh, are you, what's the other word for it? Bi? The one where you like both girls and boys?"

What alternate universe did he step in where he's having this conversation with Luke of all people? "Yes, that's the word for it, and no. I'm not bi. I'm only interested in girls."

"If you aren't comfortable talking to me about this yet, I understand."

Jess throws his head back. "This is me, talking to you. And I'm telling you, I don't like guys like that."

"I'm hearing you, but your actions today are telling me a different story." Luke puts his cap back on as he stands. "Look, I need to get back downstairs. I promise not to bring this up again, okay? You can stay up here, your eye would scare away most of my customers anyway." His joke falls flat. He hesitates before patting Jess on the shoulder. "Love you, kiddo. I should have said this earlier, but I'm proud of you for sticking up for Lane and the other girls in your class. You probably could have found a way that didn't result in you looking like you went ten rounds with Rocky Balboa, but the end result is still the same. There's leftovers in the fridge if you get hungry, or I can go and make you something-"

"I'm fine, I just had lunch." Jess leaves the melted ice pack on the table as he heads over to his bed. Luke's in one of his protective moods that makes him feel claustrophobic, making him nostalgic for the times where they would just grunt at each other and only talk when necessary.

"Okay, well, I'll be downstairs if you need me." Luke backs up slowly to the door.

Jess grabs a book off his nightstand, opening to a random page so that Luke would leave already. "I'll be sure to call for you if I get a papercut, or forget how to use a microwave."

"Okay, I got the hint. Just make sure you take some aspirin for your eye, it'll help with the swelling."

A moment later, the door clicks shut softly. With a huff, Jess gets up and heads to the bathroom, dry swallowing a couple pills.

The second the final bell rings, Dean and Lane head straight to Luke's. The place is packed, and they shove their way past people to get to the counter, where Luke is rushing back and forth.

"Hey, Luke-" Dean starts to say.

"He's upstairs. You two can head on up." He says, whizzing past them.

They thank him quickly and head up to the apartment. Dean opens the door without knocking, finding Jess lounging on the couch watching tv. He turns off the tv as soon as he spots them.

"So, how much trouble are you in?" Dean asks, shoving Jess's feet so he can sit down.

Jess rolls his eyes, but moves over so Lane can sit between them. "None." He smirks.

"None?" They echo, eyes wide.

"If anything, I owe you. I got a half day out of it. Although, there was one minor backfire that I wasn't expecting…"

Lane winces. "The black eye?" She hazards a guess.

"That? Nah, it's nothing." He waves her off. "If anything, I was expecting to get hurt a lot worse than this. No, the downside is that Luke is convinced that I'm into dudes and in the closet about it." Dean and Lane glance at each other. "What?"

After a small you go, no you go, Dean takes the lead. "Sorry to break this to you, but Luke's not the only one."

"You are now the number one topic at school." Lane adds.

Jess groans. "Which means by dinner the entire town will be talking about me."

"You better start practicing your withering, back off glare." Lane says, which earns her a glare. "Hey, that's pretty good." She points out.

The three end up heading downstairs to help Luke out. Although it ends up being that Lane and Dean help out while Jess hangs back and reads. After the fourth nosey townsfolk asked him what happened to his eye he decided the best course of action was to just hide behind a book.

And you know what they say about best laid plans…

"Hey, Jess, if you aren't too busy holding up the wall there, would you mind getting me a cup of coffee? Scratch that, just leave the whole pot here, it's shaping up to be one of those days."

With a sigh, Jess stuffs his book into his back pocket and pushes off the wall he was leaning against. "Whoa, there, Tyler Durden, what happened to your eye?"

"Do you want your coffee or not?"

"It's a long, complicated story." Luke jumps in, pouring her coffee for her.

"Well, I need some explanation to tell my parents tonight."

"Unless they're coming here, I don't see how it's going to come up." Luke pauses. "They're not coming here, right? Please tell me they aren't coming here."

"Don't worry, my mother wouldn't be caught dead eating here." Luke sighs in relief. "But I do need to kidnap your nephew for the evening."

Jess's head shoots up. "That's gonna be a hard pass. Besides, they don't even know me, why would they want me within a hundred feet of their house?"

"It seems your lie at the hospital was a little too convincing, Cliff Clavin. I got a call from my mother saying that she expects both her grandchildren tonight."

"How does she even know about that?"

Lorelai shakes her head. "I stopped questioning how Emily gets her information years ago. Now, I'll pick you up at six, and wear something nice."

"But-"

Lorelai's already out the door, leaving him dumbfounded. Dean comes up beside him. "So, you're oh for two today, huh?"

"Shut up."

Six o'clock comes too fast for Jess's liking. Before leaving, Luke makes him change into a grey button down and some slacks. He drew the line at wearing a tie though, declaring he, "Doesn't do ties."

"Now, no matter how frustrated you get, and trust me you will get frustrated, stay on your best behavior. The whole evening will go a lot quicker if you just play nice." Luke reminds him for the hundredth time as they wait in the diner for Lorelai.

"Yes, Uncle Luke." Jess says in a monotone voice.

"And don't talk with your mouth full, it's disgusting. Don't forget to use your manners, and-"

"Luke, for the last time, I'm seventeen not seven. Believe it or not, I am capable of acting like an adult."

"Well, you could've fooled me."

Jess is relieved when Lorelai's jeep pulls up out front. "Finally." With a final wave at Luke, he heads out and jumps into the back seat.

Lorelai gives him a double take. "I'm sorry, strange young man, you must be lost. I'm waiting for Jess-"

He rolls his eyes. "Can we go already? The faster we get there, the sooner this night will be over."

Lorelai starts driving, glancing at him in the rearview mirror. "Jess, is that you? Sorry, I didn't recognize you there, I didn't think you owned a comb or any shirts that don't have bands or half-naked woman on them."

Rory turns around from the passenger seat. "Ignore her. She always gets like this before seeing Grandma and Grandpa. She says it's a natural defence mechanism."

"Smart thinking. I do the same with Liz." Jess says as he looks out the window.

"Ha! I told you it's a thing! Pay up, sister!" Lorelai gloats.

Rory pulls out a five dollar bill, slapping it into her mom's hand.

Jess takes a deep breath. Tonight's going to be a long night.

Jess starts to get more and more uncomfortable as the houses around them get bigger and bigger. His fingers keep twitching for a cigarette. He regrets not begging Luke to just let him have one before coming here, just to take the edge off.

All too soon, Lorelai pulls into a driveway and stretches out the window to type a code in the box to open the gate. He rolls his eyes at that. Are they entering fort knocks or something?

They all get out and stop at the front door, no one moving to ring the doorbell. "Take a deep breath, for we are about to enter the lions den. I make no promises for anyone's safety after we pass this point." Lorelai turns to Jess. "You have your affairs in order, right?"

He shrugs. "Rory, you get my books and tell Lane she can have my music."

Rory rolls her eyes, moving past them to ring the bell. "You both are so dramatic."

"Fine, Dean gets my books then."

She spins around. "No, I'm sorry!"

Jess sticks his hands in his pockets. "Nah, Dean doesn't call me dramatic."

"Please, you're the most dramatic person he knows."

"Now that's a bold-faced lie. He knows Lorelai-"

"Children, behave." Lorelai whispers right before the door opens to show a maid. She smiles brightly. "Hi there, I'm Jarnett Olsen. These two are Mary-Kate and Ashley."

The maid looks extremely confused. "Wha…"

"Daughter and Grandkids." She clarifies, pushing her way through. Rory follows behind her mom closely, so Jess closes his eyes for a moment before following himself. He hunches down a little, trying to hide behind Rory and Lorelai as much as possible.

"Richard, they're here!" God, even her voice sounds snobbish. He's only been here for a minute and already so much about Lorelai is explained. "Oh, Rory, look at your arm! Does it hurt?"

"Hi, Grandma. No, it doesn't hurt, just itches a lot."

She ignores Rory, turning to the older man who just entered the room. "Richard, look at her. The poor girl has a cast."

"Yes, Emily, I'm perfectly capable of seeing that for myself." He smiles kindly at Rory. "Hello, Rory." His smile gets more forced as he turns to Lorelai. "Lorelai."

"Hi, Dad."

His attention shifts to Jess as he notices him for the first time. "And you must be the young man I've heard so much about for the past week." Richard also notices the black eye, but is too polite to say anything outright about it.

Lorelai rests her hand on Jess's shoulder. "Dad, this is Jess."

Jess holds his hand out to shake. "Hi, sir. You have, uh, very lovely home."

Richard takes his hand, shock evident on his face. "Why, thank you. A very firm handshake too, that's good. So many young men nowadays have such terrible handshakes, it's like holding a wet noodle." Jess awkwardly laughs along, noticing out of the corner of his eye that Rory's grandma is practically glaring daggers into him. Richard claps his hands together, shifting everyone's attention to him. "Now, I say we move this conversation to the lounge and have some drinks before dinner. What do you say, Emily?"

Her glare vanishes instantly. "Yes, of course. Lorelai, may I speak to you for a moment? In private."

"But, Mom-"

"Now, Lorelai."

Lorelai rolls her eyes. "Alright, sheesh." When she passes Rory, Jess hears a quiet, "Keep an eye on him."

Richard leads them into the lounge and heads straight for the drink cart. Rory grabs his arm and gently steers him to one of the uncomfortable looking couches.

"You doing okay?" She whispers quietly.

"Check back in an hour." He whispers back, sitting on the edge of the couch. Richard hands them each a glass of pop, before taking his own glass and sitting on the couch across from them. Jess takes a few sips to give himself something to do.

At the very least he isn't the only one uncomfortable here. He glances over and sees Rory and Richard doing the same thing as him.

"So, Grandpa, Jess here loves reading." Rory finally breaks the silence.

That catches his interest. "Really? What do you like to read?"

He shrugs. He's never been comfortable talking about himself. "A little of everything. I'm partial to Hemingway, despite what Rory thinks."

"Yes, Hemingway's a wonderful author. Anyone else?"

Jess shrugs again, wishing for the silence again.

"He's being modest," Rory cuts in. "Jess reads even more than I do and he always has a book in his back pocket."

"I don't always have a book." He mutters, looking down into his glass.

"So if we check, you won't have one with you?" She challenges him.

"I didn't say that. It was a long drive." He shifts, pulling out a beat up paperback, which Rory snatches right away.

"The Great Gatsby? That's a little on the nose, don't you think?" He only shrugs. She flips through the book, pleased with what she finds. "Anyway, Grandpa, Jess re-reads his books all the time, and always annotates them." She hands him the copy.

While he's busy flipping through it, Jess leans closer to Rory. "Are you gonna be my cheerleader all night?" He whispers.

"Someone has to. You certainly aren't going to."

"Well, I left my pom poms at home, so…"

"These notes are incredible." Richard interrupts the two. "You have a remarkable point of view, I'm very impressed." He reaches across the coffee table to hand the book back. "And I don't hand out compliments like that very lightly." Richard gives him a sly smile.

Jess fiddles with the pages of his book. "Thank you."

Rory knocks her knee against his when Richard gets up to get a refill on his drink. "He likes you." She mouths at him with a beaming smile.

He returns her smile with a small one of his own. Maybe this night won't be as bad as he thought it was going to be.

"Okay, Mom, I'm here. What's with the cloak and dagger meeting?" Lorelai meets Emily in the kitchen, picking at one of the rolls in a basket.

Emily slaps her hand away from the food. "That miscreant has a black eye!"

Lorelai pouts at the loss of food. "Is that what you had to tell me?"

"Why does he have a black eye?! Was he in some fight? I don't want someone like that hanging around Rory."

Lorelai sighs. "I don't know what you want me to tell you, Mom, you're the one that wanted him here tonight."

"I want you to tell me how he got that black eye."

Lorelai lets out a sharp breath, getting more frustrated by the minute. "I don't know how he got the black eye, Mom, he's not obligated to tell me."

"I bet it was a fight, punks like him get into fights all the time."

Lorelai scoffs. "Punks like him? Mom, you don't even know him."

Emily crosses his arms. "I don't need to get to know him, I can just tell by the looks of him."

"What looks?! The whole thirty seconds you saw him in the foyer?! Just give him a chance, isn't that what this night is for?!"

"Oh, stop being so hysterical, Lorelai. And since when have you been such a fan of the boy? From the second he moved to that town of yours, all you've done is complain about how rude and disrespectful he is."

"That was before I got to know him. Something I'm begging you to do tonight. For once, just please keep an open mind, he might surprise you. If you don't trust me, trust Rory. She has an amazing sense of character and was the one that talked me into giving him a chance."

Emily purses her lips. "Fine."

"Thank you."

Lorelai gestures for her mom to go first, and when her back is turned snatches one of the rolls. She takes a big bite and then stuffs the rest in her purse.

Out in the dining room, she hears laughter coming from the lounge. By the look on her mom's face, she hears it too. "Is that Richard?"

"And Rory and Jess too. Did you slip something in the drinks?"

"No, of course not! Why on Earth would I do that?" Emily sounds offended.

"No, Mom, it's- never mind." Lorelai shakes her head. She's not in the mood to try and explain the joke.

Emily ignores her, marching into the other room. With a sigh, she follows her, ready to do damage control from whatever havoc hurricane Emily reaps.

Jess is telling some story that's got both Rory and her dad in stitches, and none of them have noticed that they have an audience now.

"And you were how old?" Her dad asks between laughs.

"I had just turned twelve. We had this sub that was the worst. She had to be about ninety and kept insisting that The Catcher in the Rye was a horrible book that's not worth the paper it's printed on."

Richard scoffs. "Preposterous."

"I was so pissed, I spent an hour in front of the class explaining all the main points and how they are still relevant to this day."

"What did she do? Did you change her mind?" Rory asks eagerly.

Jess shakes his head. "Not even a little. She asked if I was done, then sent me to the principal's office where I got detention for a week for 'disturbing the class'." He does finger quotes at the end.

The two laugh, and even Lorelai chuckles at the image of a little sixth grade Jess ranting and raving about a book that was way too inappropriate for his age.

Her mom doesn't even crack a smile, instead clearing her throat to gather everyone's attention. When Jess realizes that he has an audience his entire demeanor shifts. His head ducks down and Lorelai can see him physically close in on himself.

"If we are finished with anecdote hour, I believe dinner is ready to be served." She announces, leading the way to the dining room.

Rory walks with her grandfather, the two of them talking with each other. Jess is slower to get up. Lorelai waits for him and pats him on the back when he reaches her. "Don't worry, you won my dad over and that's half the battle." She whispers to him.

"Any advise on how to win your mother over?" He whispers back.

"No idea. When you find out, be sure to let me know." That gets a small smile out of him. "See? Just relax. If you really wanna leave later, just give me a code word, like… Poodle! Say poodle and I'll fake food poisoning or something so we have to leave."

"Yes, because poodle is such an easy word to casually slip into conversation."

"You're the smart one, figure it out."

Lorelai keeps an eye on Jess through the salad course. Luckily he was smart enough to sit by her dad, having Rory act like a human shield between him and her mom. Rory's the one keeping the conversation going the most, smiling and giving Jess little nudges to join in every once in a while. He's still extremely uncomfortable looking, but is at least able to hold a conversation with her dad about whatever book he's currently reading.

Her mom remains suspiciously quiet the whole time, reminding Lorelai of a tiger that's about to pounce on its unsuspecting prey.

"So, Jess," Her mom says as the main course is being served. "Is that short for anything?"

Jess wipes his mouth on his napkin. "Um, no, ma'am. It's just Jess."

"That's a very interesting name, for a young man." She mutters the last part as she takes a bite of her food.

"Mom!" Lorelai hisses.

"What? It's just an observation."

Lorelai is about to argue more, but gets interrupted by Jess. "No, it's fine. I'm pretty used to it. When Liz was pregnant with me, she was positive I was going to be a girl and fell in love with the name Jessica. Then I was born and it became Jess."

Emily nods. "And you don't live with your mother anymore? You live with your father, the diner man?"

Lorelai groans. "Mom, you know his name is Luke and that Jess is his nephew."

"Lorelai, it's rude to interrupt. And I'm sorry I don't have all the facts straight, that's why I'm asking Jess here." She gestures to Jess.

"No, I don't live with my mother anymore." Jess's voice has a bit of an edge to it, like he's trying to rein back his temper. "She didn't think New York was a good fit for me, so she sent me to live with my uncle in Stars Hollow."

"Yeah! They have a tiny apartment above the diner. So small, Jess can't get that dog he's always wanted. What kind was it again?" Lorelai butts in.

"Actually, I'm more of a cat person." Jess says without his eyes leaving Emily's. Great, he sees this as a challenge now. Maybe she should have mentioned to him that fighting back is the one way to not win over Emily Gilmore.

"What are your grades like?"

"All A's." Jess shoots back. "Except P.E. I get a C, I'm not the most athletically inclined."

"Gee, this chicken sure is good." Lorelai cuts in, but they ignore her.

"Extracurriculars?"

"I tutor Dean after school."

"Work?"

"I work in my uncle's diner every day. Would you like to see the pay stubs to prove it?"

"Emily, let the poor boy eat." Even her dad is cutting in, she never thought she'd see the day that they were on the same side.

"How did you get that black eye?" She plows on, bringing the whole room to silence. "Was it a fight?"

Jess sighs. "Technically, but-"

Emily doesn't listen to the rest. "See, I told you, Lorelai, nothing but trouble."

"Mom-"

"No, I'm done listening. He's a troublemaker that shouldn't be around Rory-"

"Grandma, stop!" Rory finally speaks up, slamming her silverware down. "Jess is my friend, whether you like it or not. If you would have let him explain then you would know that he got hurt standing up to this guy in school that was a real jerk to Lane and all the other girls. And when that jerk hit Jess, he didn't even fight back, not even in self-defence." She stands up abruptly. "Mom, I'm not feeling well, I just really wanna go home."

"Um, okay, sweets. Why don't you and Jess head out to the car, I'll be right out." Lorelai digs through her purse, handing Rory the keys.

Rory nudges a dazed looking Jess, gesturing for him to get up. That snaps him out of it and he stands quickly himself. "Um, thank you for having me over." He stutters before Rory drags him out.

Lorelai waits for the door to close before turning on her mother. "What is wrong with you?! You said you would give him a chance! You obviously already had your mind made up about him, so why drag him out here in the first place?!"

"Because, Lorelai, I had to see the person you called to go see Rory over Richard and I, her own Grandparents, after her accident!"

"Wait, that's what this was about? I called him because I knew he was in the area, what's the big deal?"

"The big deal as you call it, is that we are her family, not that little punk! We should have been there!"

Lorelai takes a breath, making sure to speak slowly and choosing what she says carefully. "Mom. I'm sorry I didn't call you. I was in Luke's when I got the call and was panicking. He offered to drive me and I remembered him telling me earlier that Jess was in Hartford doing some errands, and the next thing I know, I'm on the phone with him," Lorelai pauses. "Getting that call from the hospital was the scariest moment of my life, and Jess was so calm. Without hesitation, he asked me which hospital to go to. That was the moment I realized Jess is a really good kid. Dad sees it too, and I just wish you would see it." Lorelai stands up, setting her napkin on the table calmly. "Excuse me, I have two upset kids outside I have to console. I'll see you next week."

She walks to the front door on auto pilot, hearing the beginnings of a fight between her parents.

The car ride back to Stars Hollow is a silent affair. The two teenagers seem to have swapped personalities tonight, because Rory's in the front seat fuming over how her beloved grandma treated her friend, while Jess just seems to have shut down in the back seat. Lorelai keeps glancing in the mirror at Jess as he keeps staring out the window, just waiting for some type of outburst from him, but it never comes.

As they pass the 'Now entering Stars Hollow' sign, she can't take the silence anymore and pulls over on the side of the road. She turns her body so she's facing the other two. "Please say something, the silence is becoming unbearable."

Jess surprises her by being the one to speak up. "I forgot my book."

Lorelai doesn't know if it's because of all the tension from today or the spontaneity of the statement, but for some reason she finds that hilarious. She starts to chuckle, which gets the others to chuckle, and the next thing she knows they're all red in the face and gasping for breath.

She wipes the tears from her eyes. "I don't know about you two, but I'm starving. I vote we get some take-out and have a movie marathon."

Rory perks up. "Ooo, can we get indian?"

Jess and Lorelai groan as Lorelai turns back around and starts driving again. Jess leans forward between the two front seats. "You talked Dean into voting for indian with you last time. You did your little eye flutter thing at him, that's cheating."

Rory turns to face him. "I do not have an eye flutter thing. Mom, tell him I don't have an eye flutter thing!"

"Sorry to say, honey, but you totally have an eye flutter thing. It's a thing all girls have, and with great power comes great responsibility."

"Ha!"

Rory crosses her arms with a huff, sticking her tongue out at Jess, who responds by making a face back at her. In order to stop a great war from breaking out, Lorelai comes to a decision. "Here's how it's going to go. I'm using my veto powers, granted to me since I'm the one driving the car, to get chinese. While I'm doing that, you two are going to pick out the movie. The standard rules apply, I don't care how you settle on a movie, but if you haven't gotten one by the time I'm back, then I get to pick the movie."

"Question." Jess raises his hand.

"Yes, to the racoon in the back seat."

Jess glares at her for that. "Which chinese place are you going to? Because The Golden Locus has a solid ten minutes over The Jade Monkey."

"Nice try, Jack. No hints." She stops in front of the movie rental store. "Have fun, don't go home with strangers unless they offer you candy."

They've already started fighting over the movie as they get out. Rory's wanting Princess Diaries again, while Jess wants Jurassic Park. She calls in their order over the phone from one of the menus in the car, this time conquering everything pork on the menu, then drives over to Luke's to kill some time. Parking out front, she enters the empty diner to find Luke wiping off some tables.

With a groan, she lays her head at the counter. "You seem to be missing two people." He makes conversation as he passes.

Lorelai lifts her head. "Don't worry, last I saw them they're both alive. Although there is a chance that may not last since I left them to pick out the movie."

Luke winces. "The night was that bad?"

"We didn't even make it through the second course. Oh! That reminds me." She digs through her purse, pulling out the roll she swiped from earlier. "At least one good thing came from this night."

"What happened? Did Jess mouth off? I told him to be on his best behavior."

"Whoa, slow down there, captain, Jess was great tonight. He never lost his temper with my mom, something I never could've done when I was seventeen, and my dad actually liked him. I saw him laughing, I've never seen him laugh, not even with Rory. No, the problem, as all problems lie, was with my mother." She takes a vicious bite out of the roll, talking with her mouth full. "She spent the whole night doing her thing where she makes something sound like a comment, but is really an insult." Lorelai raises her voice. "Jess, that's an interesting name for a young man. So you live with the diner man? Why don't you live with your mother?" She goes back to her normal voice. "Then! When she found out his black eye was from a fight, she started to say she didn't want him near Rory! And my perfect little angel cut in and called her out on all of it. After Rory left with Jess, I found out all of this had nothing to do with him at all. She was mad I called him instead of them the night of Rory's accident."

Luke waits to make sure Lorelai has ranted herself out. "But he's okay?"

Lorelai smiles for the first time. "Nothing a night of movies and chinese food can't fix."

"I'll go get you a change of clothes for him, he's probably dying in his current ones."

Lorelai follows him upstairs. "I didn't even know he owned a pair of slacks."

"He doesn't. We had to go get him some a few weeks ago."

Lorelai holds a hand to her chest. "You went shopping without me?"

Luke opens the dresser, pulling out a shirt. "We went to Walmart. Got him a few pairs while also getting groceries. It wasn't exactly American Eagle."

"One, I'm shocked you even know about American Eagle,"

Luke grabs a carryall from under his bed, throwing the shirt in. "Of course I know about it, I'm not living under a rock."

"Two, you still won't shop at Doose's?"

Luke pauses from putting Jess's toiletries in the bag. "Taylor is not seeing a dime from me until he lets Jess back in his store."

Lorelai nods, watching Luke come back over to the other side of the room to grab some more things. "Fair. And my last point, please tell me there is footage of the two of you shopping for clothes. Oh! Did you make him try them on? I noticed they actually fit him, as opposed to his usual style of wearing clothes that are obviously way too big on him."

"Yeah, I had to drag him kicking and screaming to the fitting rooms, where he complained the whole time as I made him try on different sizes until we finally found the right one. I swear, one minute he acts like a completely functioning adult, and the next I'm dealing with a ten-year-old."

Lorelai waves him off. "Don't worry about it. If anything, it just means he's comfortable enough around you now to let his guard down."

Luke sighs, plopping down on Jess's bed. "Do you think that means he'll talk to me, you know, if he has stuff weighing on his mind?"

Lorelai nods as she puts the pieces together in her head, sitting down next to Luke. "This is about that rumor going around town, isn't it?"

Luke starts wringing his hands. "It's just, I tried talking to him when we got home, but that's never really been our thing. I'm worried he was just denying everything or saying whatever he thought I wanted to hear, so that the conversation would be dropped."

Lorelai rests a hand on his arm, getting him to stop fidgeting and look up at her. "Jess is young, he needs some time to figure things out for himself first. What I can promise you is that if he needs to talk to someone, he'll come to you first."

"How do you know that? I overheard him tell Dean that it was, and I'm quoting him here, 'The guinness world record for most awkward conversation ever'."

"He's a teenager, all conversations involving dating are 'The most awkward thing ever'. Rory's been with Dean for almost two years now and she's still uncomfortable holding his hand in front of me."

"You're sure?"

"Positive." She glances at her watch. "I need to go pick up our food, and Thing 1 and Thing 2 before there's a bloodbath at the movie rental store. Kirk said he'd charge me late fees out the wazoo if they stain the carpet."

"In that case, here's his bag, I'll walk you out. Want some coffee for the road?"

"Do you really need to ask?"

Luke stops her before she can go downstairs. "And, um, thanks for the advice and listening to me ramble. You've been a pretty big help lately with the whole Jess thing and I just wanted to make sure you know I really appreciate it."

"Hey, you're looking at the queen of rambling here. Plus, you're playing catch up here, I got to enjoy Rory through the 'worship the ground I walk on' phase. You got Jess in the middle of the 'I'm a badass rebel, I'll do what I want' phase with no warning, you have the right to ask for as much help as you need."

It looks like a huge weight has been lifted off Luke's shoulders. "Thanks."

"Anytime, you can just pay me back in coffee."

Luke rolls his eyes. "Alright, come on."

Christmas in June is the theme that Rory and Jess finally settled on. They got Home Alone one and two, refusing to acknowledge the third installment, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, and then made a deal on the last two, Rory can get It's a Wonderful Life if Jess can get Die Hard. Lorelai drives up as soon as they walk outside.

"Dang, you two leave any movies for the rest of Stars Hollow?" Lorelai asks as they climb in.

"Mom, quick, should Die Hard be classified as a christmas movie?"

"Duh."

"Ha! Told you!" Jess says as he digs into one of the containers and snacks on a potsticker.

"Mom, how could you?" Rory whines.

"Sorry, babe, the truth hurts."

That doesn't stop Rory and Jess from fighting about it the rest of the way home, and then continued the arguing as they set up the food and movies, only pausing when they split up to change.

"Alright, enough, mama's getting a headache." Lorelai complains as she hands out plates.

"I will once Rory admits she's wrong."

"It's just my opinion that Die Hard is not a Christmas movie."

"Then try having a right opinion."

"How about we play the silent game." Lorelai interrupts them.

"But-" They both start to complain.

Lorelai shushes them. "Movie's starting, no more talking."

Jess looks like he's going to argue more so Lorelai throws an egg roll at his head. He glares, but wisely stays silent, munching on the egg roll instead.

Rory lasts for the first three movies, giving up and slinking off to her room when Die Hard starts.

"Hey, kid?" Lorelai says as the movie starts. Jess hums that he's listening, not taking his eyes off the tv. "I'm sorry how my mom treated you tonight."

Jess shrugs. "I've been called a lot worse. I have tough skin, I'll get over it."

"Still, it wasn't fair and it wasn't right. I just want you to know that." She leaves it at that, turning her attention back to the movie.

About twenty minutes later Lorelai glances over and finds Jess fast asleep in the chair. Turning the movie off, she takes the blanket off the back of the couch and drapes it over him. "Night, kid." She mummers as she passes.

Jess jumps awake by a loud knocking. With a groan, he squints at the clock on the mantle and balks at the time. Who thinks it's okay to make a social call at seven o'clock in the morning? Someone in this dumb town, that's who.

Lorelai and Rory are in agreement when they both come stumbling out of their rooms.

"Mommy, make it stop." Rory whines, wrapped up in her blanket. She flops onto the couch and hides under the blanket, the only thing sticking out is her cast so she won't put pressure on it.

Lorelai has her own blanket wrapped around her shoulders and drags her feet to the door. "Luke, you know we don't do Saturday morn- Mom? What are you doing here?"

Rory peeks out from her blanket and exchanges a look with Jess. Jess really wishes he hadn't fallen asleep here now. He can't get to the back door without passing the front door, but maybe if he can get upstairs and climb out of one of the back windows, he could use the porch to get down from the roof.

"Lorelai, is that how you always answer the door?"

"It is when it's seven in the morning on a Saturday. This is the last time I'm going to ask, why are you here?"

"Are you going to let me in?"

"Nope." Jess sighs in relief.

"Fine. I just came to drop off this. Rory's… friend left it at our place last night and I thought he might want it back." She falters on the word friend.

Lorelai catches that too judging by her scoff. "Wow, Mom, it really pains you that much to admit that Jess is Rory's friend? Well, get used to it, because he's here to stay. He is a permanent fixture in Luke's life which means he's a permanent fixture in mine and Rory's."

"I know. That's become fairly obvious now, isn't it. I was out of line at dinner and I apologize. Make sure Rory and Jess know that."

Lorelai sighs. "You should come in and tell them yourself."

Lorelai and her mom round the corner as Jess stands, trying to pat down some of his bed head. Lorelai hangs back as Emily takes the lead. "Rory, Jess, I would like to apologize for my behaviour the other night, the way I was acting was completely inappropriate. My fight was with Lorelai and I dragged you in the middle of it."

"It's fine, Grandma. I'm sorry for yelling."

"You were defending a friend, you had every right to be angry. Now, may I have a moment alone to speak with Jess here?"

Rory glances at him, and at his nod, nods herself. "Yeah, of course, I'll go get a pot of coffee started. Mom, wanna help?"

"No, I'm great right here- hey!" Rory grabs Lorelai by the arm and drags her to the kitchen. "We'll just be in here!"

With the other two gone, things get way more awkward. Jess isn't sure what to do with his hands, or if he should sit or stay standing. Emily hands him back his book, which solves one problem.

"So, here to tell me to steer clear of Rory? Because-"

"What are your intentions with my grandaughter?"

That… is not what he was expecting. "Excuse me?"

Emily sits on the edge of the couch, folding her arms in her lap. "Do you have feelings for Rory?" She asks bluntly.

"She's my best friend, my first friend since I moved here, and maybe… when I first got here, before Dean and I became friends, there was something… but things are different now." Jess never realized how much his feelings for Rory have changed, or when they changed. If he had to guess it would be around the time he and Dean became friends. "Like I said, Rory's my best friend, and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that. I like hanging out with her and Dean and Lane, and I like hanging out here."

"I see." She studies him for a moment. "I understand what Walter Renard was saying, you really do take after Lorelai."

"What?"

"Oh, I'm just thinking out loud. That coffee Rory made should be ready by now, let's go get a cup before it's all gone."

"Okay…"

Jess takes the lead, heading into the kitchen and taking the mug out of Rory's hands, who's in regular clothes now. "You shouldn't have." He smirks before drinking half of it in one go.

"Hey!"

"I'll buy you a cup at Luke's, plus a muffin if you let me have this."

She squints at him. "Fine. And that reminds me, Dean's working now, wanna go get breakfast and tease him as he works on cars."

Jess shrugs. "I'm up now and there's nothing better to do on a Saturday morning in this boring town."

"Admit it, you love it here now."

"I don't know what you're yammering about."

"You can play the attitude all you want, we all know you're a small town boy now."

"You take that back!"

Rory grins and nudges him. "But Lane told me how you're a local hero."

"I'm no hero."

She ignores him, looping her non-broken arm through his. "Standing up to Chuck Presby, fighting for Lane and all the other girls honor's."

"That's it, you're buying your own coffee."

The door closes, cutting off their voices from Lorelai. "You were right."

Lorelai jumps. "Gauh! Mom, don't sneak up on people like that! Were you a spy for the CIA or something? And what was I right about this time?"

"It pains me to admit it, but he's not as bad as I first thought him to be. If anything, him and Rory make a good pair."

Lorelai doesn't even have to think about. "Yeah, they do, don't they."

"You know, when you first said you were pregnant, I always thought your child would turn out more like Jess."

"How? A moody teenager whose every other word is 'huh' with the occasional 'whatever' thrown in for variety?"

Emily rolls her eyes. "I'm not even going to begin to point out the irony of what you just said. What I meant was, he's more spirited, you could say. He's not afraid to speak his mind, regardless what other people might think. Now, who does that sound like?"

"Winona Ryder?"

Emily huffs in defeat. "I expect to see him again next week with you and Rory so I may properly meet him."

She's already heading for the door, not waiting for an answer. "Whoa, Mom, I had a hard enough time getting him to go the first time, plus you just spoke with him, you don't need to meet him."

"Lorelai, speaking with someone who has obviously just woken up and is still in their pajamas is not properly meeting them. Now if you're finished, I must be going."

Lorelai sighs. She's going to have to do a lot of bribing to get Jess to go along with this again. "Alright, fine, I'll figure something out. Maybe I could put a spell on him that will make him follow my every command. Or maybe I'll find a genie that can grant a wish, or-"

"Goodbye, Lorelai."

"Bye, Mom." Lorelai lays her head on the table and finally relaxes when she hears the front door close and the sound of Emily driving away. She never should have answered the door.