I'm super sad and generally feel terrible... so I am sharing that feeling. Have a sad fic.

-HTTYD-

It was already too late.

The second he laid eyes on the devastation, Hiccup knew they didn't stand a chance. Even as they hovered, squinting through the smoke, he could see fallen friends, shattered families and charred memories. The sounds of battle screamed in his ears.

Astrid locked eyes with him, ignoring the burn and smoke and sound. They landed, taking a last moment amongst the chaos to hold hands, to look at each other. To memorialise the tiny details; Astrid ran her thumb over the scar on his chin while Hiccup stared at her eyes, her mouth, the metal hanging around her neck.

Even as something exploded dangerously close by, they shared the last kiss either ever expected; it was desperate, rough, tasting of the tears on Astrid's cheeks. Swallowing thickly, Hiccup nodded at her. Astrid returned it. They didn't need to say it. It was there in the air as both turned, and entered the fray.

He wished he'd said it.

Downing another mouthful of bitter brew, Hiccup rubbed his thumb over the metal coin clutched in his palm. He'd taken it off her body, almost alone in the survivors of the battle, and selfish enough that he wanted it to himself rather than allowing her to take it beyond life with her.

He wished the last words Astrid had heard were him saying he loved her. Not the frightened scream of people dying.

Toothless warbled, nudging at Hiccup with his head against the skin full of alcohol. Hiccup pushed his dragon away weakly, knowing he drank too much and too often. But what else was there? The scant few survivors, human and dragon, had scattered after the fallout.

So now all had Hiccup had left was his dragon, his memories and his mead.