Written for:
Quidditch round 11 - Team: Holyhead Harpies - Position: Beater 1 - Prompt: Cujo — Stephen King
Chosen prompts: (dialogue) "Stay out of my room!" - (emotion) shame
Also written for: Hogwarts assignment 6 - Herbology - 2: Write about someone being injured
Risk and Reward
Word count: 2997 words
A/N - The Cujo book/film is about a friendly dog that is bitten by a bat and gets rabies. He goes rabid and attacks people he knows, before being put down.
What this story is, is Snape (because he gets compared to a bat) causing Moony to become "rabid" (whereas canon Moony is accepting of the marauders in animal form, "rabid" Moony is more violent).
Remus jumped at the sound of the goblet hitting the desk. He hadn't heard the door open or Snape enter. He hadn't been expecting the other wizard for another fifteen minutes and Snape wasn't usually early.
"Severus, how are you today?" Remus asked, knowing that Snape wouldn't answer. In the few months they had resided in the house, Snape never did when it came to pleasantries. There was no answer and Remus looked up, finding Snape's impatient gaze fixed upon the goblet.
Remus turned his attention back, his gaze lingering on the steam billowing from the top of the goblet, but hesitated. In an ideal world, Remus would be able to control himself during the full moon and wouldn't need a potion. In an even more ideal world, Remus wouldn't transform at all.
Remus couldn't control any of that, but there was one thing he could control and that was the body that was forced upon him each month. By keeping his mind whilst a beast, he ensured that everyone around him could be safe.
It was one of the few things in his life he had control over and that mattered. He had lost that control once and almost harmed the students he had vowed to protect. He would never allow that to happen again - he would never allow himself to miss another potion and risk harming someone. He reached out, his fingers closing around the goblet. "Thank you, Severus," he said politely, before bringing the goblet to his lips and drinking down the foul liquid.
He set the empty goblet down and Severus quickly picked it up, silently leaving.
As quickly as the door closed, it was thrust open again, banging against the wall. Sirius strode into the room, pushing the door shut behind him. "I thought he'd never leave," he muttered.
Remus snorted, but chose not to comment. Severus had been in there less than five minutes, but of course it felt like longer to Sirius.
"How are you settling in?" he asked instead, knowing that asking about the house was enough to take Sirius' mind off Snape completely.
Sirius dropped down onto the bed, sighing heavily. "Couldn't be better," he replied, a forced chuckle escaping his lips. "Just the same as I remember it, down to the pictures on the wall."
"Yes, I did take a look to see," Remus admitted. "Naked Muggle women."
"On motorbikes," Sirius quickly added.
Remus couldn't help but laugh. Sirius had said the same thing when he was seventeen. Sirius' frown disappeared and he chuckled too. "So… how many hours?"
"Three," Remus replied. "I'd like to do a check on the basement door soon."
Sirius waved his hand. "I'm not letting you go down there for the transformation. I told you already that you can transform up here."
Remus began to shake his head, but he knew the defiant look in Sirius' eyes and could already tell that Sirius would win the argument. He was too tired to take Sirius on at that time.
"Only if we ward the house," he finally said. "But when the Order start arriving, I can't take that risk."
"Sure. We'll just go into the woods nearby, just like old times," Sirius said.
"There are no woods near here," Remus pointed out. "We're in central London." He considered the basement once more, recalling Sirius' fear of the dark and considering his latest issues with confined spaces which neither of them wanted to address. "Perhaps we can speak to the Headmaster and ask if we could use the Shack?"
Sirius' smile appeared once more. "Yeah, maybe he'll allow us to do that," he said, rising. "I'm going to check that the house and I'll shut down the Floo and set the wards early. We're not expecting anyone else today so there's no point in waiting. Do you want me to grab you some chocolate or a cup of tea?"
Remus shook his head. "Maybe in an hour. I don't want anything to affect the potion and Severus has always insisted on an hour's wait to ensure the potion works correctly."
Sirius pulled a face at the mention of Snape. They both knew that Severus didn't have to make the potion for Remus and that he only did on Dumbledore's orders.
"I don't trust him," Sirius finally muttered as he approached the bedroom door.
"I don't think you'll ever trust him," Remus pointed out.
Sirius snorted. "Come down in an hour. I'll have some tea in the teapot you brought and I'll set out some chocolate cake. Just like old times, right, Moony?"
"It'll never be like old times," Remus murmured softly.
Sirius' hand rested on the door. "What do you mean?"
"I prefer to think of this as a new start," Remus insisted, knowing full well that Sirius was fragile after Azkaban, already taking Remus' previous words as some sort of rejection. "The old days involved James and Peter. They involved mistrust and betrayal and loss. Perhaps we should look forwards now. We should focus on what we have now, however little."
"I'm anything but little," Sirius joked weakly.
Remus smiled. "In comparison to what we've both lost," he clarified. "But you're right; you're a big part of anyone's life." He hesitated. This was all new again and he didn't know where he stood with Sirius anymore. "You're a big part of mine."
He waited for an answer. Sirius hadn't moved from his spot against the door and Remus wondered if he had said the wrong thing. He wanted to say something - to perhaps take the words back, but held his tongue. When it came to Sirius, the truth was always better, especially now when they had to build the trust up between them.
"You're the biggest part of mine," Sirius admitted. "Though… Harry…"
"Harry," Remus agreed, needing no other words. Harry would come first because Harry was James' son.
Sirius glanced over his shoulder, a ghost of his old smile on his lips. "One hour, Moonpie." His fingers wrapped around the doorknob and he twisted it, opening the door. "Don't be late or the tea will go cold."
He door clicked shut behind him as he left and Remus stared at the faded wood. He remembered the last time he had been called Moonpie. It was the day Sirius left their bed to check in on James. The last time he had seen Sirius before Sirius went to Azkaban.
Hope welled up inside of him. Maybe one day when the war was over… maybe.
...oOo...
Remus paced the living room, the familiar itch under his skin making him want to claw at his own flesh. He resisted the urge - clawing at himself didn't sooth the need - it didn't help at all. The small sliver of chocolate cake threatened to come back up and Remus took deep breaths and began to name all of the moons of Jupiter, hoping that it would distract him from the pain. Sometimes he'd recount the periodic table or another list of information - and that would work for a time, until the pain was too bad.
He finished the moons and began to list the stars in each constellation. Sirius was perched on the edge of a moth-eaten sofa, his eyes following Remus' movements. He made no move to stop Remus, clearly remembering how on edge the full moons in their youth made Remus.
Finally the recounting stopped helping. Remus walked around the back of the sofa, not wanting Sirius to see as he undressed, tossing the threadbare pyjamas over the back of a nearby chair just as his skin began to feel hot. Tremors of pain ran through him and he clutched the table, his fingers digging hard into the wood.
"Sirius, you need…" Remus murmured, letting go of the table and dropping to his knees. His muscles began to strain, his spine began to curve and he tried to keep the cries of pain to himself. The only sound was the gasping breaths that fell from Remus' lips.
Seconds later, he felt a large body pressing against him. He fell against the dog, allowing his friend to support him. He felt the anger and bloodlust build up and clenched his hands. It took a moment for him to realise that the feelings building were in conflict with the potion he had been taking.
"Something's wrong," he said, his fingers gripping Padfoot's fur. "The… the potion… you need to leave."
The dog shook his head, but Remus used his grip on Padfoot to shove him away. "Sirius, leave," he insisted. "It didn't work. It feels… wrong. The transformation is wrong. Get out. Now."
He didn't have anymore energy to push Sirius away. The pain got worse and Remus couldn't hold back the cries of pain anymore. The room was filled with the sound of bones breaking and shifting and Remus' sobs.
...oOo...
Sirius wanted to say something as Remus paced the room, but he couldn't think of anything. There was still a massive divide between the pair of them and the words he used back when they were teenagers and young adults didn't seem enough anymore. Mostly he wanted to get up from the sofa and wrap Remus in his arms. Maybe one day they would be there.
He didn't turn when Remus walked around the back of the sofa to change. Remus had done that for the previous couple of full moons and Sirius knew he had to allow Remus his privacy. He waited until Remus spoke again. "Sirius, you need…"
He quickly transformed into Padfoot and rushed to Remus' side to offer support. Fingers clenched in his fur. Sirius chose to ignore Remus' insistence that he leave. He knew Remus had spent so many full moons alone and had already vowed not to let him spend another one alone.
Remus' eyes shifted from amber to yellow and that was when Sirius knew something was wrong. When taking the potion, Remus' eyes never changed colour.
Moony stilled, his gaze focusing on Padfoot. There was no playfulness in his stance or even anything to signify he recognised Padfoot at all and that worried Sirius. Even that first full moon upon their reunion, there had been recognition in Moony's eyes.
Moony had never looked at him like that though, like Padfoot was prey. Padfoot took a step back, feeling for the first time in years, unsafe in Moony's presence. The only other time he had felt like this was the first time they had transformed with Remus for the full moon.
His movements were watched carefully by the werewolf and with each second that passed, he felt more and more at risk. He was relieved that the house was warded and no-one else could get in. He just needed to get to a room with a door.
Without giving any indication that he was going to do so, Padfoot turned and bolted towards the door. He didn't know what doors were open, but he'd find one and get in and get the door closed. He raced up the stairs, the werewolf on his heels, snapping and snarling and attempting to catch him, and his gaze fell on his room.
The door was open and he bolted inside. Just as his front paws went into the room, he felt teeth sink into his back leg, pulling him backwards with force. He attempted to pull his leg back, but the wolf held tightly.
He knew the teeth had broken skin and that meant he was infected. Without thinking, he transformed from Padfoot back into his normal state, grabbing his wand and shooting fire from his wand, startling the werewolf for a second.
That was all he needed. Moony let go of him, pulling back from the fire, and Sirius stumbled into the room and shut the door, quickly throwing up as many protective wards as he could.
When he finally felt safe from the rabid monster on the other side of the door, he fell down onto the bed and looked at his blood-soaked trousers.
...oOo...
Remus woke up to Sirius carefully wrapping the blanket around him. "Sirius?"
Sirius smiled at him. "You've just turned back. Let's get you to bed," he said softly. "I ran a couple of spells and don't think anything is broken."
"Anything else can wait until morning," Remus murmured, attempting to get up. Sirius offered his hand, assisting Remus up from the floor. "Why am I outside of your bedroom?"
Sirius shrugged slightly causing Remus to frown. Sirius never shrugged something off. It meant it was a question he either didn't want to answer, or didn't have an excuse for yet. "Let's not worry about that - you must be tired."
"Did the potion not work because I don't remember anything about last night."
There was no answer as Sirius slipped an arm around his waist and guided him up the hallway to his room. They slowly walked over to the bed and Remus almost collapsed into it. Though there were no breakages, he felt like the wolf had really had a tough night. Sirius fixed the covers. "I'll leave you to sleep. Call me when you wake up and I'll—"
"Sirius, are you limping?" Remus asked, his eyes fixed on Sirius' leg. Sirius froze on his way to the door, but didn't turn. "I smell blood," Remus added.
"Nothing," Sirius quickly replied. "I caught my leg on a bit of broken furniture when I was tidying up a few minute ago. Nothing to worry about."
Remus could hear the lie in Sirius' voice. He could always tell when Sirius was lying. "Did Moony… did I do that?" he asked, already suspecting what the answer was.
Sirius shook his head. "You'd never hurt me," he insisted softly. "This wasn't on you and it wasn't on Moony." He limped from the room, closing the door behind him.
Remus stared at the door for a long time, unable to fall back asleep as he always did after the full moon. He knew he had hurt Sirius during his transformation, but had no idea how bad it was. Was it just a scratch whilst they were playing around, or was it something more? Did he bite his best friend?
...oOo...
"Stay out of my room!" Sirius insisted, as Remus went to walk inside. Remus spun around, his eyes fixed on Sirius who was holding a tray with a teapot, two cups and breakfast.
It was too late. He had seen the blood on the sheets and seen the blood-soaked cloth and also the bandages. Not to mention the empty vials that Remus' sensitive nose detected were blood-replenishing potions.
"What did I do?" Remus insisted. "Did I bite you?"
It took a long moment for Sirius to answer. He nodded his head. "Yes and no."
"How can it be both yes and no?" Remus demanded.
"Because you weren't you last night."
"Moony then."
"No. You… you weren't Moony either. Before you transformed, you even said that something was wrong, Remus. When you turned, you weren't Remus in Moony's body and you weren't Moony either. You were… you were like this wild, rabid creature that wanted nothing more than to rip Padfoot apart."
Remus gaped at Sirius. For so many years, Sirius had insisted that Moony would never hurt him yet it had finally happened. Sirius even admitted he was a monster, yet his friend wasn't angry.
"Something turned Moony into that beast," Sirius continued. "The only thing I can think of is your potion. As much as I despise him, we both know Severus is the best at potions that we've ever seen. He wouldn't have made your potion incorrectly by accident - because you'd have noticed the difference. But imagine if he could alter the potion in a way that wouldn't affect the taste? You said before that adding anything to it could render it useless. I think he did something to it to make the werewolf rabid."
Remus shook his head. "I… I bit you," he whispered, ashamed of what he had found out. Whether Snape had messed up the potion or not, Remus knew he had to take responsibility of what his wolf had done. "I'm so sorry."
"When we were younger, me and James discussed this. We had discussed what would happen if you bit one of us when we spent the full moon with you. We both understood that it was a risk we were taking, that it was our own choice. I chose to be with you last night, even when you said something was wrong. I was the one who chose not to leave."
Remus turned away from Sirius, rushing down the hall to his room. He dropped down at the side of the bed, his head in his hands. A minute later, Sirius set the tray down on the bedside table and took a seat next to him.
"I don't blame you," he murmured. "I know it was Snape. But... this has happened and there's nothing we can do about it."
"You're being very mature," Remus whispered.
Sirius smiled. "I'm not looking forward to transforming, but I am looking forward to spending every full moon with you. Though we may need to get someone else to make the potions for us." His arm slipped around Remus' waist. "I can do this."
"You can," Remus agreed, lifting his head from his hands and turning to look at Sirius. "What do we do now?"
Sirius glanced at the tray. "Well, my leg is bandaged and it'll be fine for a few hours. I was thinking tea and breakfast, followed by a nap because I heard you tossing and turning since you came in here. After that… well, maybe plan our revenge."
"I can go for tea, breakfast and a nap," Remus agreed. "And as for the full moon… you know I'll be there to help you, right?"
"We'll help each other through it," Sirius insisted. "Together."