'

Once again, Ben was nervous. This time, he didn't have Tie with him and he felt terrified without his best friends calming presence. If he fucked this up he didn't think he could ever forgive himself. As he waited outside the Tapas restaurant Rey had suggested, he kept having to wipe his palms on his jeans. He'd arrived thirty minutes early so he wouldn't have to enter the restaurant on his own. Han had even offered him a whiskey to settle his nerves but he had declined - he'd sworn off drinking alcohol for the foreseeable future, it could mess with his meds and he'd relied on alcohol too much when he had been living rough.

When he saw Rey walking towards him, his felt his chest tighten painfully, his breath freezing in his lungs. She was also early, bundled up against the cold night air. She froze for a second when she saw him, as if surprised, then quickened her pace as if to make up for it.

Ben found his tongue unresponsive.

When she reached him, Rey gave him a shy smile, "Hi."

He felt himself smile in response and some of the tension left his body, "Hi, err, shall we go in?"

She nodded and he held the door for her, as she passed him he caught a wisp of perfume, it smelled like sunshine and honey, warm, like Rey. He swallowed thickly and followed her inside.

As they were taken to their table, he was pleased to see that it the restaurant was quiet, he had picked a Tuesday night in the hopes of there being less people around.

When they were seated and the waiter had given them their menus, there was a slightly awkward silence. For his part, if was half due to the fact that when Rey had removed her coat and scarf, he saw she was wearing a dress.

It was dark red, of a simple design, nothing fancy or flashy and she'd teamed it with opaque black tights and slightly battered doc martens, her hair was loose and his fingers itched to tuck it behind her ears. She looked absolutely perfect.

Ben took a fortifying breath before venturing, "It's nice to see you."

She looked up from her menu, releasing the lip she had been biting, "You too… I'm glad you text."

Ben nodded, before he could say anything else, the waiter arrived to take their drinks orders. When he disappeared again, Ben realised he had had no idea what to say, how to start conversation, his mind entirely blank. Luckily Rey spoke up, and they discussed the menu, deciding to get dishes to share. It turned out Rey had quite an adventurous appetite and Ben was happy to be led by her.

Their drinks arrived and they gave their order. After the waiter left again, Ben asked Rey what she would do for Christmas. The moment the words left his lips, he wished he could take them back as he remembered that she didn't have a family. To his surprise, she smiled as she told him all about the traditions she had created with her best friends. As she talked she relaxed and he felt himself do the same as he forgot his worries and just enjoyed her company.

Their easy conversation continued after their food came, as they shared their dishes, encouraging the other to try something they wouldn't normally eat.

Even in his wildest dreams, he had never thought he would be this comfortable. He felt safe with her, even if she made his palms sweat and his heart thump in his chest, this felt so right.

He didn't order any pudding, just coffee, but Rey got a dark chocolate and brandy mousse. He liked watching her eat, her face was so expressive, and the noises she made over the mousse made him regret not ordering one himself.

As if she sensed his thoughts, Rey's eyes opened, (they had been closed as she savoured each small spoonful). She gave him a small smile, then collected another spoon and leaned over, offering it to him.

That she offered something she was enjoying so much, as well as the fact it was offered on the spoon she had been using, made his breath hitch. He leaned forward carefully, for a second meeting her eyes as he took the spoon into his mouth. He could only manage a few seconds though, before he had to close his eyes.

When he opened them again, letting the spoon she still held slide from his mouth, she gave him a warm smile, her cheeks a little pink, "It's sinfully good, isn't it?" Ben could only nod as he licked his lips, "Would you like some more?"

He smiled as he shook his head, "I couldn't possibly deprive you."

A determined look entered her eyes and she scooped up another spoonful and held it out to him. Ben gently took the spoon from her but turned it around, offering it to her as she had done for him.

'

'

Somehow, despite her nerves, the evening was hands down the best date, (at least she thought it was a date), Rey had ever been on. Somehow she felt as if she had known Ben all her life. As though she had been expecting him, some part of her subconscious known that he would come, had waited for him, and recognised him when he finally arrived in her world.

The look on his face when she had taken off her coat had made her stomach flip. Finn and Poe had persuaded (coerced) her into wearing a dress. They had wanted her to wear something more 'sexy' but hadn't found anything like that in her wardrobe when they ransacked it. She had felt silly and self conscious in her simple wrap around dress and had insisted on wearing boots but Ben had looked at her like she was Aphrodite descended from the very Heavens. It had made her a little braver.

Ben wasn't far off a greek god himself, and in his all black outfit of jeans and a shirt, he made her think a little of Hades. Though Rey was sure Hades had never had such soft, gentle eyes. They were eyes she could drown in, and she knew the warmth growing inside her wasn't just from the small glass of wine she had had.

Poe and Finn had been very firm in their instructions to her. She was to have a good time, she was not to second guess everything Ben said or did, and she was not, or under any circumstances, to beat herself up for saying something a little silly or doing something clumsy.

Some of it their commands were easier said than done, but it was good advice and she kept reminding herself of it as the evening progressed. The need for reminders grew less and less though as Ben made it easy to forget any awkwardness she felt.

Rey thought she could listen to him talk all night. His voice was beautiful, low and deep and it tugged at something below her navel, gave her little shivers that stippled goosebumps over her arms and the back of her neck.

She got bolder as the evening went on and by the time her pudding arrived she dared to offer him a taste of it. She watched, spellbound, as he leaned forwards and took the spoon into his mouth, closing his eyes and making a hum of approval.

When he refused more but turned the spoon around, her heart skipped and her pulse jumped in her throat. She took the spoon into her own mouth, very aware that it had just been in his. It was probably silly, but for her it may have been the most erotic thing she had ever done.

When she opened her eyes, which had drifted shut, she found him gazing at her intently, and she didn't think anyone had looked at her like that before, as if he were mapping her face, capturing her very soul… Somehow it was like being seen for the first time, anyone else never having truly known her till now.

He kept the spoon and continued to feed her the rest of the mousse, by the time it was all gone her cheeks were pink and a hum was vibrating across her skin… and she was now certain that this was a date.

Ben insisted on paying the bill, and when she protested he pointed out with a soft smile that she bought dinner last year and now it was his turn. Rey had no comeback for that, so she acquiesced.

As they left the restaurant, bundled up again against the cold, she couldn't help the feeling of regret washing over her at the prospect of saying goodbye.

"Would you like a walk? I know it's cold but it's a beautiful night." She didn't know where this courage was coming from, but she went with it, childishly crossing her fingers inside her coat pockets as they paused on the dark street.

Finn and Poe would be so proud of her.

Ben smiled down at her, again reminding her how tall he was, how broad. Something in the back of her mind told her she would never be afraid of anything when he was around. He made her feel safe.

"If you're sure you are warm enough, I would love a walk," he offered her his arm, a little hesitantly.

Rey took it immediately, remembering to uncross her fingers before she did.

He was warm, he radiated heat like a tiny black sun.

Rey had not been exaggerating when she had said it was a beautiful night. The sky was cloudless and the moon full, the stars looked like diamonds strewn across black velvet. There was little wind but it was still cold, the air was frigid in her lungs, especially when they reached the seafront.

But Rey couldn't find it in her to care.

'

'

Ben was a little worried that Rey may get ill as they walked along the prom, looking out at the town lights reflected in the dark sea. But he was selfish and couldn't bring himself to part with her yet. Her arm in his was welcome, he was a little breathless at her contiguity, but there was no way he wanted her to let go.

They walked in silence, but it was a comfortable one. She made it so easy to just exist in her presence, with no pressure to make small talk or say anything clever or flirtatious. Which was good for him because he didn't know how to do any of those things.

They both paused naturally and looked out to sea, gazing at the silver pathway the moon cast on the water, drawing their eyes to the horizon and thence to heaven.

Finally he got the nerve up to ask her if he could see her again, "Rey, I-"

"Ben, would-"

They both stopped as they'd both spoken at the same time, Rey gave a little, slightly giddy laugh and gestured for him to continue, but he shook his head, "Ladies first."

She did the cutest little eye roll he had ever seen, a smile tugging at her lips, "I was just going to ask, if perhaps, you may like to do this again?" her smile had lessened a little and she looked a trifle anxious, as if his answer were of great importance to her, as if he were someone special. He thought his heart may burst from his chest as he nodded emphatically, he couldn't seem to stop himself, "Yes. I really, really would, thank you." He winced at how desperate that had sounded, but Rey only huffed a relieved sounding laugh and he smiled back at her...fortune favours the brave... "I really like you Rey."

For an awful moment, her eyes went wide and he thought she was going to cry, instead she let go of his arm and flung hers around him, going up on her tiptoes to press her lips against his.

Ben froze, shocked into stillness. When he didn't respond she dropped back down onto her feet, a blush on her cheeks and doubt in her eyes.

He couldn't have that, so he pulled her back to him, leaning down so he could capture her lips. It had been a very long time since he had kissed a girl, and he had never kissed one like Rey, but for once, his mettle held. It was a chaste kiss, just the meeting of lips with one hand cupping her cheek and the other pressed against her lower back, yet it was also everything.

When he pulled away, he kept hold of her, resting his forehead against hers as he made his confession, "I've wanted to do that since the moment I met you."

"Really?" she sounded astonished, almost breathless.

He smiled, "Really."

"I never stopped thinking about you," she whispered, her voice sounding a little choked, "I looked for you, so many times and I was so afraid something awful had happened to you. And then like a miracle you turned up at Tractor Bean. I can't tell you how happy you made me."

He smiled, resisting the urge to wrap her in his arms, fairly sure that if he did, he would never, ever let go, instead he took a shaky breath in and said, "I'd like to continue, if you'll let me, making you happy that is."

Rey nodded jerkily, "I can't think of anything I'd like more."

Then she pulled him to her once more, this time, when their lips met, they were less restrained, and if their lips tasted of salt and their breathing was uneven, neither of them minded.

Some people may call them broken, others may label them as damaged goods, but with each other, none of that mattered and everything was perfect in their eyes.

'

'

Thank you for reading ^_^

Songs:

Wires by Athlete

Run for Cover by Sugababes

Dust to Dust by The Civil Wars

How to Save a Life by The Fray

Bring Me to Life by Evanescence

You Saved Me by Skunk Anansie

Light Me Up by Kobra and the Lotus

Head Over Feet by Alanis Morissette

Love Controlled Despair by Poisonblack

What I've Done and Castle Of Glass by Linkin Park

The title is taken from Safe & Sound by Taylor Swift feat. The Civil Wars