Heyo, minna-san! How the fuck are ya?

I'm back with another chapter of this comedy story that I thought up when I was drunk.

Fucking Everclear...

I swear I'll drink that shit everyday!

Anyways, things been goin' well for me in real life aside from working and shit. So! I'm in a really good mood now and I'm pretty much motivated to continue this story.

What happened last chapter?

Well, Goku has a fiancée. Note that fiancée meant a gurl or whamen that engaged to a boi or maan while fiancé is a boi or maan that is engaged to a gurl or whamen.

Ya, maan.

That's what they meant according to google.

Now, let's reply to some review before we start, shall we?

Thedarktheme:

so what will change in hachiman's life?
his mind? his attitude? or something else? or nothing?

A: His outlook towards companionship and people, and bits of his past. More specifically, his childhood. Note that Goku is the most genuine person Hachiman has ever met. Apart from that, nothing really changed much. He still confessed to Kaori and got rejected, he still in the Service Club and had Iroha as his Kouhai. He still is cynical and his sight on youth is the same as ever.

rikusp2002:

Okay.

WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUU-

Seriously.. The last line is making me laugh so damn hard..
Excellent choice! Keep this up, I'm engrossed in this beauuu-tiful shit!

A: Why thank you! Good thing someone enjoys Goku befriending Hachiman FanFiction, as well as some anime-like comedy and jokes. This is indeed a beautiful shit.

BecauseIamCooler:

I didn't want to copy TFS so much but when the shoes fitted: This is so non-canon, it hurts.

A: This IS FanFiction. Key word, "Fan".

DarkNight21:

Like this, hope you continue on with this! Can't wait for the next chapter !

A: Well, you're in luck, buddy! Here's a new chapter!

A Fan:

GOKU!? HOW IN THE FU-... you know what? I'm just going to roll with this. To the next chapter, I guess.

A: Yeah, just roll with it and don't take everything so seriously. This is just an amateur story so it's not that good.

Thanks for the follows, favs and reviews! Really fucking appreciated it guys and girls.

Now, without fucking the ado from behind, let the chaptah commence!

Chapter 3: Childhood Friend and His Life

An 8-year old Hachiman was walking in the streets with a 6-year old Komachi. They were planning to go to a playground near the mountains. Just a few days ago, they traveled from Chiba to Paozu to visit their grandparents. Oji-chan and Obaa-san was nice people in Hachiman's opinion. They never questioned his eyes or his appearance in that matter. Just now, while they were putting on their shoes, an old man named Son Gohan came to visit their grandparent. He was nice as well, never questioned his eyes but he said he likes Hachiman eyes!

Hachiman felt so happy to hear that.

No one ever complimented his eyes.

Both the Hikigaya siblings were humming together while skipping towards the playground. Just as they neared the playground, they saw a few bunch of kids a few years older than him circling someone. Hachiman stopped his tracks, proceeding to stop Komachi's tracks who were confused. He squinted his eyes to get a clear look at the one who got circled.

It was a boy his age.

He had a weird hair, spiky and pointing at directions like a palm tree. He wore some old dogi with a pouch on his fur-like belt. He had a pout on his face. Hachiman knew what was happening to the kid.

"Hah! Look at this kid!" One bully said to his companion.

"What's with that hair?"

"Yeah, right? He looks totally dumb."

"He's so damn ugly! A perfect guy for us to beat up!"

Hachiman's right hand clenched tightly. They bullied him because he looks different than them. It just reminded him of kids back in his school. The god awful memories he had to bear. Seeing someone like that just makes him angry.

"Ugly?" The boy questioned with a tilt of his head before pointing his index finger towards one of the bullies. "But she said you're ugly because of your big nose."

"W-Wha!?" The leader, the big-nosed leader yelped in surprise.

"Oh! Man, that was savage!" One of the bully commented. "He got you right there!"

"S-Shut up! Tsukiko never said that! You're just lying!" The leader said with a frown on his face.

"But I'm telling the truth..." The boy insisted with his eyebrows furrowed.

"You...! Let's just kick his ass!" The leader said as he sends in a punch, only to get a fist right on his big nose, earning a nosebleed.

The leader was sent back away skidding on the ground. The other bullies looks towards their leader before staring back at the palm-haired boy. He was in some kind of fighting stance.

"We're playing, right? Let's do it!" He said with an excited grin.

"Kick his ass!"

"You'll pay for punching our leader!"

"Feel my fist!"

"Our power level is over 9000! You won't beat us!"

They threw in empty threats and insults before charging at the boy. Everything went ugly for all of them and the boy. However, the bullies all got what they deserved. All of them got their butts kicked and are all on the ground, groaning in pain. All the while the boy seemed to be still energetic and shows no sign of fatigue.

"Aww...that's all y'all got? I'm disappointed..." He said to the bullies with a sad face.

Hachiman and Komachi, who saw this just widened their eyes. He took on a total of five bullies a few years older than him without breaking a sweat. The insults, the threats and all of the rude comments thrown at him didn't faze him. He just stood there as if the comments were fell on deaf ears.

"I thought you guys were strong." He said.

The bullies stood up, all of them holding on their injuries with pained looks on their faces. Their face immediately scowled and frowned at the palm-haired boy. At that, the boy can only tilt head.

"Bozu, let's get the heck out of here! We can't beat him!" One of the bully said to his leader.

"Tch, fine." All of them walked away, stumbling on the way before the leader looks at Goku. "You're ugly and no one will like you. No girl will like you! So screw you!" He yelled before running away with all of his followers behind.

"He may or may not tell you this...but I'm his fiancée." She declared.

And this happened...

"Wait..."piyan-se"...so that's what it means..." Hachiman muttered to himself.

"Heya, Karen!" Goku called from behind Hachiman. "Already finished?"

"Yes, Goku." She smiled warmly and sweetly at the palm-haired boy. "Now let's go."

"Can I stay here for a bit?" Karen blinked a few times. "Please?"

"...alright." She sighed. "I'm sorry for him barging into your house."

"Uh, no. It's okay..." Hachiman replied, before he remembered their fridge was almost got emptied. "I guess..."

"I see." She said, eyes squinting. "Did he do something to your fridge?"

At that question, Hachiman made a face that says; 'How did you know!?'

"Ugh, Goku!" She called. "I told you not to eat someone else's food without permission!"

"B-But I was hungry!" Goku replied, pouting while holding is belly.

"I'm really sorry for his behavior." She apologized and bow down, causing Hachiman to flinch.

"No. I said it's okay." Hachiman said with his hands up in the air. "Please stop bowing."

She stopped and opened up her purse. "It may bot be much, but please take this."

She grab Hachiman's hand and place the cash on it. He look at the cash and immediately, his eyes widened at the amount of cash. It was 10,000 yen! For god's sake! It was just too much!

"I-I can't accept this." He tried to hand back the cash.

"Please take it. Goku can cause quite the mess. Especially with his bottomless stomach..." She said, her face crunched up in pain in a split second before smiling. "Can I come in as well? I have to watch over him."

With that kind of face, Hachiman couldn't do anything but accept the cash she gave.

"Oh, please do." Hachiman said politely, she was a guest after all.

They all came into the house and proceeded to enter the living room. Komachi who sat there blinked in confusion at the sudden appearance of a young and beautiful girl she had seen in her life. Not only that, even the current outfit the girl wore has baffled her as well. It was as if she was a commander of some army! Komachi kept staring at the girl as she sat particularly next to Goku, who did not mind, like, at all.

"Are you...?" Komachi started off, causing Karen to continue her words.

"His fiancee? Yes. Indeed I am." She proudly said for some reason. "And you must be Hikigaya Komachi, the little sibling, right?"

Komachi nodded. "Yes. And you are?"

"My name is Karuizawa Karen." Karen introduced herself once again.

"Karuizawa...somehow, that family name sounds familiar." Komachi thought to herself before smiling at the blue-head. "What brings you here, Karuizawa-san?"

Hachiman, not being a social person he is, didn't said anything and just observe the conversation between the two. Goku being Goku, didn't mind what they said and just day dreaming about a bouquet of food or all-you-can-eat buffet.

"Goku here wanted to visit you here while I'm on my business trip." Karen replied, getting a nod from the young Hikigaya.

"If you don't mind me asking, what business were you here for?" Komachi asked again.

"I just had some business talk with the Yukinoshitas." She replied, before smiling at the thought of a certain She-Devil. "I also want to visit am acquaintance of mine who always tries to tease me."

Hachiman was intrigued by what she just had said. She was connected with the Yukinoshitas and had a business talk with them? Why? And why does this acquaintance seemed to resemble exactly her? Hachiman just continued to observe the two.

"That sounds important!" Komachi exclaimed, before thinking about how she was so young to run a business. "But, what is your actual job? A business woman?"

Karen giggled at that. "A normal business woman could not possibly caught the attention of the Yukinoshitas." She shook her head as if it was an obvious thing. "I work as a commander for a Private Military." She stated, causing the two Hikigayas to widened their eyes. "Have you heard of the Black Ribbon Military?"

"W-Wait...you're...a commander!?" Komachi said, quite shocked at her statement.

"Indeed I am." Karen nodded.

"B-But why are you engaged to Go-kun?" She asked the most mysterious question.

Hachiman agreed with Komachi's question. Why? From what he could remember, Goku was a grandson of an old man that lives in the mountain. There wasn't any particular special about his family at all. And they weren't rich as well, they were considered to be poor. Sure, Goku is different. He had a tail of a monkey. But that's all. There wasn't anything special about him. So, why?

"Hm? Didn't you know? Aren't you guys his childhood friend?" Karen questioned, confused at their lack of knowledge towards their childhood friend.

"Even if we were his childhood friend doesn't mean we remember everything. He also might hide something from us or he just doesn't know." Hachiman replied calmly, earning a acknowledging nod from Karen.

"Ah, yes. I forgot that this is Goku who you befriended with since you were child." She said in realization before her face turns serious out of the sudden. "Have you heard about the King of Iron Fist Tournament?"

"Wait, wasn't that a long time ago? What about it?" Komachi replied.

"You see, Son Goku's grandfather here was a friend of the sponsor of the tournament, Heihachi Mishima." She explained, before continuing further on. "Son Gohan had won one of the tournament hosted before and earn a large sum of money since he didn't want to take over the Mishima Zaibatsu Corps."

"Whoa...what a price..." Komachi gasped.

Hachiman was really shocked at hearing that. Now that he remembered it, Goku as a child did mention about his grandfather being strong and had won a tournament of some kind before. Hachiman never expected that his grandfather had won a really big tournament before and just assumed it was some local martial art tournament.

"The money was used to buy the mountains where both Goku and Son Gohan lived, but the money was still much..."

"So, you're saying that you're marrying him because of money?" Hachiman questioned, before shaking his face in denial. "That can't be it."

Karen smiled at his perceptive observation. "You're right. I wasn't engaged to him because of that-no."

"Then, what is it...?" Komachi said, still confused.

"A few years back then, Goku here used to travel all around the world." Karen said, earning a shocked face and gasped from Komachi.

"He did!?"

"Yes." Karen nodded. "He said he was searching for artifacts his grandfather had told him to protect called "Dragon Balls"."

"That...kinda sounds weird." Hachiman thought witha sweat-drop.

"Around the time he was searching for those artifacts, he had unknowingly infiltrated one of our base or more specifically, one of our most largest base." She explained, smiling how she first met him. "All the soldiers and captains there came down upon him with full military force."

Komachi became speechless at that. Hachiman had his eyes widened hearing that before knowing where this was going.

"And you saved him, right?" He asked, smiling as if he was right on the spot.

"No, he saved himself." She replied right away, her words struct him like a "bam" straight to his face. "He single-handedly crush the full military force with his bare hands and his bo staff. He took out not one, two or even five, but 10 fleets of ships." This statement was like an atomic bomb that exploded in Hiroshima and Nagasaki blew right on Komachi's and Hachiman's face. "And this is no normal ships we're talking about. This is the largest ships existed on this planet. We ARE the most largest and the most powerful Private Military in this planet after all."

"H-He...did that...?"

"Yes." Karen closes her eyes, "He was just an innocent kid at that time, he didn't knew anything. Son Gohan had passed away and he was all alone, searching for those artifacts."

"Why..." Hachiman began, causing Karen to open her eyes and stared at him. "Why are you telling us this?" Hachiman's face was serious. "We aren't anyone special. I mean, for all we know, we weren't even important."

"Think again, Hikigaya-san." Karen said, smiling. "You both are childhood friends of Goku's. Even if you're not important to the rest of the world, Goku here holds you very dearly." She said, pointing at the palm-haired boy who happens to doze around the time Karen explained about his grandfather. "He was really happy, you know? When I mention that you both lived here."

Hachiman had his eyes widened, same goes to Komachi. They haven't realized that during the time they spent together, Goku had hold them as a really precious friends. He was always bullied, left alone like how Hachiman used to. Having someone to talk so casually and familiarly was really important. Hachiman always gone to that park with Komachi just so he can meet Goku. He remembered it. Companionship was what Goku had wanted for a long time. Meeting them here was Goku's most happiest decision. How can he not realized that?

"The reason I'm telling you this is because of him. I just want you guys to be careful around him. He can be really destructive." She said and smiled warmly at Goku while stroking his hair. "I'm sure he'll visit again. For now, me and him are going to get going for another business trip." She sighed. "These Sewanin can really be annoying at times..." She muttered.

She woke Goku up by shaking small yet well-built body. With one eye left open, he walks out of the house along with Karen. He was sleepy due to eating the whole of the fridge earlier. Goku said his goodbyes and went towards a car, a military truck to be precise and entered inside it. Karen was still talking with the Hikigaya sibling before saying her goodbyes as well.

As sh turned, she didn't walk towards the military truck, "I forgot to tell you guys this...the reason why I'm engaged with him is because...let's say that I'm very fond of him..." She walked towards the car, her ears can clearly be seen as red as she quickly entered the military truck to hide her massive blush.

The Hikigaya waved at them as Karen drove off her truck.

"Haa...that was really tiring." Komachi said, exhausted.

"You tell me. I'm not really a sociable person." Hachiman replied as he went into the house.

"Now that you said, Onii-chan, you didn't talk much earlier!"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever."

"She was a beauty! That Karen is really beautiful and cute!"

Their conversation continued on in the house as their schedule became normal back...

While driving, Karen's eyes rolled towards Goku, who was sleeping soundly. She smiled at the sight before it went serious once she thought about the Hikigaya. She did it. She just did it. She talked with them about Goku and did something else there...

"The Dragon Balls must be hidden and mustn't be discovered. If it does, the world will plunge into chaos...especially now that the Mishimas knows the existence of Goku..." She looks towards Goku and stroke his head once again. "I'll protect you and your wishes at all cost, Goku."

She then went on driving towards another business trip...

Yeah, I know.

I guess I rushed it this time.

But well, I was just hyped since I just finished playing Tekken 7's Story. I know, I know. I'm pretty much late to the party. Not everyone can afford buying PS4 along with the sticks and Tekken 7 disc.

I also added in some crossovers like, as I said above, Tekken 7 and other things. When you carefully read the chapter, there's Yukinoshitas and the mention of Karen's acquaintance that she had a displeasure of having to acquainted with, which I'm sure you all know who it is. There's the counterpart of the Red Ribbon Army, the Black Ribbon Military who are the biggest Private Military in the planet, having even dwarfed even the Mishima Zaibatsu and the G Corps. One of the main reasons why they cannot bring wars to all of Earth.

Black Ribbon Military is a really terrifying Private Military.

And then, there's Goku. A one-man army, a really powerful one that even the Mishimas had come to noticed much like how Akuma/Goki was noticed by Heihachi who was defeated by said man.

Ah, note that Black Ribbon Military is the opposite of Red Ribbon Army, which means they're the good guys. Wondered how they showered Goku with full military force of tanks, soldiers, SWATs and fleets of ships? Well, that happens when you suddenly broke the defenses like it was nothing and infiltrated a Private Military. That's how.

Last but not least, the small reference to the rich Sewanin family. Who and what franchise did they came from? Figure that yourself. If you found out who they are as well as their story, I applause.

*Clap!*

Meme!

*Clap*

Review!

Goku will be in for a huge and international affairs between the Zaibatsu Mishima, G Corps and the Black Ribbon Military.

HOWEVER!

That would happen behind the scenes. I'm making a story of Hachiman's and Goku's (probably Komachi's as well) relationship. No homo, man! No! Not that! Absolutely not that! Shut it, Ebina!

Anyways, you know what I'm getting at. It's just a simple comedy story, don't take it too seriously. Sorry if I made the story seemed serious. I'm, as I told you guys, are new to the all writing and shits. So, expect some grammar mistakes and all. Thanks for reading this and leave a feedback as well as favs and follows please!

Thanks!

Chao!