Author's Note: So I was playing Persona 5 recently, and I honestly wondered how Joker would get along with the rest of the cast. Around the same time, I also had flashbacks of a Spongebob YTP where Patrick kills Spongebob for looking inside of his secret box. Think of this as the twisted love child between the two. That'll come into play later though. For now, be sure to leave plenty of feedback in the comments!

Akira just couldn't catch a break these days. In the span of a year, the young man and his confidants had made their debut in highly anticipated follow-up to Persona 4, took down several corrupt adults, danced the night away in the Velvet Room and were now given an invitation to join the Smash Bros. Tournament. Sure, while he knew that his parent company Atlus were determined to capitalize on the success of Persona 5, with more spin-off games, he was still ecstatic that he was chosen to participate in the tournament.

Still, just thinking about the horror stories some of the contestants told him before arriving gave the phantom thief chills. After receiving his invitation from the mysterious Master Hand, Akira was randomly invited into a group chat with his fellow competitors in order to get to know them better. How Master Hand had managed to do this was beyond him, and Akira decided not to question it at this point. Stranger things have happened after all.

Anyway, some of the Smashers managed to give him inside info about some of the would-be contestants and needless to say...Akira kinda felt bad for them. As he thought to himself in the back of the van Ryuji was driving, the horror stories of Smash tourneys past still flowed through his mind. According to veterans like DK and Fox, the Melee Masters (Or so they liked to call themselves) Game and Watch and Mewtwo, the Brawl Bozos (Names that the Melee Masters gave them that kinda just...stuck around I guess) Pit, Meta Knight, and Snake, and the Four Champions (Basically the former top contenders from the previous tournament) Cloud, Bayonetta, Greninja, and Ryu, the past tourneys were pretty hard on some people.

Take Sonic for instance. Turns out that the guy was actually scheduled to appear during the Melee tournament, but he was still dealing with the fallout of the space colony ARK almost crashing into the Earth, along with the death of his home console at the time, the Dreamcast. By the time he arrived at the Smash Mansion to meet with everyone (And trying his best to actually make it there on time), he was unwittingly engulfed by a spare Subspace bomb that one of the R. left lying out in the open. Yikes. Then, after days on end wandering the Great Maze, he stumbled onto Taboo, broke his wings, and then proceeded to get knocked out by the god-like entity immediately afterward! It didn't exactly help that Mephiles the Dark had "killed" him a week before this, but the less said about that game...the better.

Shovel Knight had it even worse too! After the announcement of the fourth Smash Bros. tournament, many people were eager to see the shovel-wielding hero in action and for good reason. Shovel Knight was a popular figure amongst the Nindies ( Nintendo Indie Characters such as Shantae and Gunvolt) that made up some of the staff working at the Smash Mansion, and his following was only growing with time. Despite what he had going for him, Master Hand still decided not to include him, saying: "Despite his skills, I am afraid Shovel Knight will not be included among our ranks for several reasons. First, we already have more than enough knights and swordsmen amongst our ranks. Secondly, I still believe Shovel Knight must gain more experience in his own world before truly being ready for combat. Finally, after the Subspace incident, I found myself having to dig myself out of a giant wii remote ...for FIVE MINUTES. Let me repeat myself, I, Master Hand, the all-knowing mastermind of this tournament, and the FINAL BOSS...had to SCRATCH and CLAW my way out of a CHILD'S PLAYTHING… for five minutes. If ANYTHING must remind of that...WRETCHED experience, than more often than not it's that horrid shovel! End of discussion!" So….yeah, Shovel Knight has had it pretty rough, and don't even get me started on-

"Hey, we're here" Ryuji says as he stops the van in front of the mansion. Stepping out of the van, Akira took in the sight of the huge building that lay before him. To his right, half of the beige colored building was adorned with a variety of decorations, ranging from Mushroom stickers to neon lights stretching all the way to the top of the near 50 story building. Patches of dandelions and moss surrounded the complex, with purple looking vines wrapping themselves around the lower sections of the building. Akira was no expert on architecture, but he thought someone should at least attend to the weird plant life. Even then, the building still looked welcoming and grand enough to for the phantom thief to call a temporary home. Well, that's how the left half of the building looked to Akira. As for the right half...

"Hey, Akira?" Ryuji asks the Persona user. "Did that Master Hand thing tell you if this mansion was fireproof?"

"Huh? Uh, no Ryuji, he didn't tell me it was fireproof." Akira replies back. " Why would you-"

"I'm asking because half of the damn building's on fire!" Ryuji loudly exclaimed.

To Akira's right, the mansion was engulfed in waves of fire. Ashes and crackling fire overwhelmed his senses as the heat of the scorching flames shattered the illusion of calm from earlier. However, amidst the torrent of heat that surrounded them, something was still very odd. Despite the outside of the mansion being completely scorched, the inside seemed completely unscathed. Still, it begs the question on how the fire-

"SCREEEE!" Without warning, a piercing howl blasted Akira and Ryuji's eardrums. As they looked up into the night sky, a silhouette of a giant winged creature could be seen in the pale moonlight. From what Akira could make of it, the creature in question had a metallic body and yellow wings. It's bright yellow eyes seemed angry and irate, focused solely on death and destruction. As it flew around the mansion, the monster angrily spewed fireball after fireball at the mansion, with each one having little effect.

"I-is this for real" Ryuji finally asks. "What's a monster like that hanging around here for!?" As soon as Ryuji uttered those words, the dragon's attention immediately shifted towards the two teenagers. As a slight grin grew across the monster's face, the beast flared its nostrils and charged a fireball as big as the two persona users combined. But just moments before the two phantom thieves were burnt to a crisp…

Whoosh! Before the two could react, they found themselves inside of the mansion's main hallway, entangled in a huge butterfly net! "Whew! That was a close one, right mayor?" said an energetic voice behind the captured boys. "Oh? Were you saying something Isabelle?" another voice replied. "I was too busy enjoying the scenery outside." "B-but, Mayor!" Isabelle squeaked back, "Those two new assist trophies were about to get roasted alive back there!(Along with most of my dandelions too…)" "Well, it's not like Ridley's temper tantrums aren't justified. He did lose a match today against Pit of all people." "That's not nice Mayor! I think Pit could use a win under his belt! Especially since he's the kind of guy that cries himself to sleep at night watching those weird soap operas that Meta Knight's been showing him. Still-"

"Uh, guys?" Ryuji abruptly asks the two, "This is nice and all but, what the HELL was that thing outside the mansion!?" "I'd like to know about that too…" Akira quietly comments to the Animal Crossing representatives. "Oh, that was just Ridley out there." Villager replies in a nonchalant tone. "Whenever he loses a match to someone he hates, and I mean really hates, he gets pretty salty and throws a massive temper tantrum outside the mansion. In some ways, I guess we're more alike than people think…" Villager creepily adds. "Riiiiiiight." says Akira, trying his best to avert eye contact from the wannabe serial killer standing before him. "Oh, by the way, why did you just call us "assist trophies" just now?"

With a smile that would put Jack Frost's to shame, the boy eerily says "Oh, Master Hand never told you about test he puts all the newbies through did he? Well, it's not that I blame him though...it is pretty grueling." "G-grueling!? What are you talking about?" Ryuji half shouts. "You'll see what fate has in store for you eventually...but for now, I'll happily escort you to where Master Hand is!" the boy says in an unusually cheerful voice. "Oh, my name is Villager by the by, and the furry looking thing next to me is Isabelle!" "M-mayor!" Isabelle shouts back, "D-don't embarrass me while I'm on the job! Speaking of which… where's Lucas? Wasn't he supposed to be helping on the front desk a while ago?"

As if on cue, a young boy with blonde hair and a striped t-shirt ran frantically down the halls marble halls, passing through several stone columns along the way. At the same time, a fully grown man in a gray bodysuit could be seen chasing the boy down the halls, with the most defining feature of his outfit being the black bandana he wore on his forehead. "LUCAS!" the man screamed at the frightened child, "WHERE DID YOU PUT THE BOX!?" "I-i don't know Snake, honest! W-we've been d-doing this for the past half hour now, and I'm telling you that Ness put me up to it!" the young boy explained with fear seeping into his eyes. "NO ONE's allowed to look into my secret box, Lucas, not even you! Now get back here!" Snake shouts.

As the frantic chase between the soldier and psychic continued, Akira could only stare in bewilderment as he turned to Villager. "Is this what it's always like in this madhouse?" Akira finally mutters. "Oh good sir," the Villager whispers to the Phantom Thief, "We're just getting started."