Worse Games To Play

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Shepard's party on the Citadel leads to drunken party games and seven excruciating minutes in a closet with Garrus Vakarian.

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Disclaimer: This author in no way profits from the writing of this story. All characters, dialogue, or other referenced material from the Mass Effect trilogy belongs to Bioware.

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Shepard was feeling delightfully light and giddy as she turned to see James and Ashley come around the corner from her bedroom. Whooping and catcalls met the pair as they rejoined the group. With their earlier flirting and the red flush of their faces, Shepard was willing to bet they'd done more than talk during their "seven minutes in heaven" in her bedroom closet.

At least they'd been less awkward than the first pairing, Joker and Grunt. She'd worried about them even fitting in the closet together without the krogan breaking her pilot.

She cringed at the mental image of the two of them cooped up in that small, dark room together. She really didn't want to know what had happened in there. There could be more problematic pairings, she supposed. Like Miranda and Jack or Javik and Liara… or, well, Javik and anyone, actually.

She brought her mind back to the present as Vega leaned forward to spin the empty beer bottle on the table, an eager silence falling over the room. She held her breath as it slowed, skidding around one last time until it finally stopped… pointing straight at her.

She groaned as the others laughed and gasped, clamping down on grins as she turned her glare on them. Her "commander" look didn't have quite the same effect after she'd had three of those drinks Traynor had mixed up for her. A sort of nervous excitement fell as Ashley reached out to spin the bottle once again, securing Shepard a partner.

Shepard looked around to see their faces—some looked uncomfortable and others nervous. Several looked excited, and she could distinctly hear a mutter of "Come on, Miranda" coming vaguely from Joker's direction.

The bottle slowed to a near stop in front of Liara—blushing purple and raising her drawn-on brows—and then kept rolling right past her to settle on Garrus Vakarian. The entire room reacted—cheers, grumbles, and giggles. Tali let out an excited squeal and exchanged looks with Liara, Jacob raised a knowing brow at Miranda, and Zaeed gave Garrus a hearty clap on the back.

His eyes met Shepard's over the bottle before darting away awkwardly. She tried to stifle the blush that spread across her cheeks. Their awkward walk of shame was accompanied by cheers, cat-calls, and humorous bits of advice.

Shepard winced internally as she approached the closet door. This game had been a terrible idea.

Not that she wasn't interested in getting her turian friend alone. Much the opposite, really. But since he'd never shown more than a friendly interest in her, she'd always held back. She didn't want to pressure him or make him uncomfortable, and she definitely couldn't chance losing the friendship that kept her going when things seemed their darkest.

Still, she couldn't help a thrill running through her as she passed through the door that would enclose them, studiously avoiding her turian's eyes all the while. EDI ushered them in far too eagerly, and in an instant they were cut off from that world, left alone in the near-dark of the closet.

Shepard tried to appear nonchalant as she hefted herself up onto the weapons bench. (How does she normally position her legs? Do they just hang down like that?)

Play it cool, Shepard. Try to ignore that the gorgeous turian is literally within arm's reach.

And try to remember his visor is broadcasting your temperature and heart rate. Embarrassing.

"So…" she began, scouring her mind for something—anything—to say. "How's the Thanix cannon holding up?"

She might have laughed at how he brightened at the question, but she was too busy mentally berating herself for losing what might have been her only chance.

"I've got it back to maximum efficiency," Garrus told her happily. "If I calibrate it daily and adjust the targeting parameters—" He stopped abruptly, looking at her with suspicion. "You're never this interested in the weapons systems."

She shrugged, embarrassed. "Just trying to think of something to talk about. To make this go by faster."

"Right." He coughed nervously. "So what do people usually do during this time, anyways?"

"They kiss," she said, hoping he couldn't see her blush in the dim light. "That's the whole idea, after all. Maybe more if they're feeling adventurous." She cocked her head at him curiously. "Have you ever been kissed, Garrus?"

She watched him blink behind the blue glow of his visor. "No…" he said slowly, drawing out the word. "I've only been with turian women. We don't really have the, uh, proper parts." He motioned vaguely to his mouth, his movements strangely jerky and tight.

She would forever blame it on her drunkenness, but something made her slide down from the weapons bench and take a step forward, closing the space between them. She felt breathless, her skin suddenly tingling with the anticipation of touching him. "Would you like me to show you?"

He stared, and her heart pounded in the silence.

Something possessed her to move.

Her hand came up to the unscarred side of his face, stroking down his mandible with her fingers. She cupped him gently, pressing her lips to his mouth. Did she imagine it, or did his lip plates open slightly at her touch?

His mandible fluttered nervously against her hand as her tongue slipped out to taste him, sweeping the place where his mouth parted. She drew back to press featherlight kisses along the side of his face before dropping her head to rest against his cowl. She breathed in the warm scent of him and felt like she might die happy right then and there. She'd wanted to be close to him for so long.

"Shepard…" he said hoarsely, a ragged edge to his voice. She pressed a finger to his mouth to silence his protests.

His mandible scraped her cheek as she lifted her head to pause at his ear. "If it makes you feel better tomorrow, you can blame it on the alcohol," she breathed. Her fingers made a trail down the seams of his armor.

"Should I?" he asked. Her fingers stilled. Her blood rushed hot in her ears in the split second before she decided.

"No," she said softly, and his body stiffened. She was making him uncomfortable after all.

She'd been so careful not to do this to him, but as soon as they were locked in a room together, she had launched herself upon him like a horny teenager. Ashamed of herself, she moved to pull away.

Suddenly, two taloned hands came to hold her at the waist. She didn't dare look up.

"Thank the spirits," she heard him hiss, and he lifted her back onto the weapons bench. At eye level now, she finally met his gaze, filled with hesitant hope.

"You want me?" she whispered, in a soft voice she could hardly credit as her own.

His eyes smoldered. "I do."

She moved back in, kissing the scarred side of his face. His hands moved up and down her body, as if they were trying to take all of her in. She pulled back. "What do turians do instead of kissing?"

Garrus smirked a little. "Humans show affection with their lips. We show it with our tongues." He let his tongue flick out of his mouth for a moment, and Shepard thought she might melt into a puddle on the floor.

"Show me," she breathed. He began taking long swipes with his tongue against her sensitive neck, swirling around the shell of her ear.

Her skin was on fire where his long, raspy tongue touched her. He held her like she was cherished, moving against her as if to memorize her.

When she thought she could take no more, there was a jarring knock on the door.

"Time's up," said EDI's voice.

Shepard and Garrus stared at each other, the spell broken.

After a long silence, Shepard spoke. "We'll finish this tonight," she said. "When everyone else falls asleep."

He smiled. "It's a plan."

…

There were catcalls and cheers as the pair rejoined the circle.

"What happened?" Tali hissed at Garrus as he sat down beside her.

He glanced at Shepard. "We talked about the Thanix cannon."

When everyone was distracted by the next spin, Kasumi materialized next to Shepard. "I know that look," she whispered in Shepard's ear. "That's the look of a woman who's waiting for everyone to leave." She laughed, then disappeared again. "You're welcome, Shepard."

Shepard shook her head, wondering just how much of this was Kasumi's doing. But she really should thank the thief. Maybe something shiny would do.

Shepard settled back in to enjoy the rest of the night. With a glance up, she caught Garrus looking. A delicious, warm feeling stirred within her, and she licked her lips. Even if she was feeling a bit impatient, there were worse games to play.

…