Finally, another chapter! Thank you so much to everyone for your patience and for the reviews – I really appreciate your thoughts.

PLEASE NOTE: This chapter delves into Spencer's emotions as he starts to grasp the death of his mom. I know a lot of people are going through tough times right now with family and friends dealing with the coronavirus. Just wanted to warn you that this part is emotional. But our inner strength will help us all get through it. Take care everyone!

PS alas, I don't own any of these wonderful characters.

…

With time, as Reid's sobs started to quiet, Hotch contemplated what to do next. Realizing he needs to leave Reid in the hands of others to get his head straight, he glanced over at Rossi and saw JJ and Prentis had joined him. Catching JJ's eye, Hotch gave a subtle gesture for her to join them. Without hesitation, JJ rushed over, pleased to be able to help comfort her friend. Giving Reid the best look of understanding he could, he rubbed his shoulder and stood, putting his trust in JJ and Morgan to take over.

With a shake of his head, Hotch made his way over to Rossi and Emily. The three stood silently together for a moment, still in shock themselves.

Finally, Rossi broke the silence. "Do you think there's a chance we can get Reid out of here anytime soon?"

"I don't know," Hotch replied with a sigh, glancing back at Reid. "I have a feeling he'll refuse to leave until they've finished up with her here and take her …" He stopped before mentioning the morgue, glancing away as flashes of Hailey's crime scene ran through his mind.

"Hotch, if you need to take a moment, I can handle some things here," Rossi said, knowing Hotch himself was still recovering from his loss.

"No, I'm fine," Hotch replied with some bite in his voice. "Sorry," he said in a quieter tone, glancing at Rossi. "I'm fine."

Taking a deep breath, Hotch continued. "Alright. If we can't get Reid to leave, maybe we can at least get him to sit in one of the SUVs so he's not seeing everything they're doing. Emily – can you go see if you can work with Morgan and JJ to accomplish that?"

"Of course," she said, nodding as she left on her assignment.

The two experienced profilers watched as Prentiss made her way over there.

"If they can do that," Hotch said, "I'd like your help in reviewing the crime scene with me."

"Anything you need me to do, I'm here," Rossi replied, patting Hotch's shoulder.

Soon after, Reid reluctantly allowed himself to be led to a nearby SUV. He sat inside, keeping the door open with friends close at hand, while Hotch and Rossi sadly did what they came there to do.

Time passed and eventually the CSI team and police had everything they needed. For as glad as the team was that they were done, the profilers had been dreading the moment that she would be taken away.

Spencer had spent much of that time in a daze, his mind jumping between everything in the past to everything soon to come. Seeing the CSI team loading up in the cars, he stirred, turning to look out the back to the crime scene.

"Are they done?" he asked, looking at his friends, his voice sounding rough.

"I think they're close," Morgan replied cautiously, glancing between his friend and the scene. He saw Hotch and Rossi slowly making their way towards them.

Reid climbed out of the car when they neared. "Are they done?" Reid asked again, this time to Hotch. Seeing the look on Reid's face, Hotch could only nod in reply.

"I need to see her," Reid pleaded. "Please, Hotch."

Hotch knew he couldn't refuse him. "Alight, but you know you have to keep your distance."

"I know."

"Come on. I'll go with you," Hotch said, gently reaching for his arm.

Reid seemed very unsteady as they walked, with Hotch keeping a light grip on the back of his arm. The farther they made it from the SUV to the crime scene, the more Hotch heard Reid's breathing increase, but his steps sped up as well.

As they reached Diana, Reid stopped and paused nearby, then slowly kneeled down before her. Hotch cautiously took a step back to give him a small sense of privacy, but kept within reach in case he was needed.

Spencer just felt overwhelmed. Here was the woman who had more impact on his life than anything else, gone in such a brutal way. "I'm so sorry, mom," he blurted out. He instinctively reached out to touch her, but caught himself before he went far. He pulled his hand back and brought it to his face as he cried. The guilt he felt in that moment outweighed everything else.

"This shouldn't have happened," he said, choking up. "I'm so sorry, I never meant for this to happen to you. It's all my fault!" He shuddered as the emotional pain coursed through him.

Hotch felt such a connection to Reid at that moment. He couldn't stand back and let him condemn himself as he had done with Hailey.

"Spencer," he said as he knelt next to him, placing his hand on his back. "No one understands your feeling of guilt more than me right now. But you have to believe it's not your fault. No matter how much you feel like you put her in this position, you didn't. Only the man who did this to her is guilty. That evil lies with him, not you."

He paused, hoping Reid was taking his words to heart. "She was so proud of you, Spencer, of the amazing person you are and of the work you've done to save so many."

Spencer had slowly quieted as Hotch spoke, trying to take in his words, though his soul cried out against them. He took a deep, shaky breath.

There was so much he wanted to tell her, hoping somewhere, somehow, she could hear him. After a short while, he spoke. "You probably know everything going through my head right now…'a mother knows'," Spencer said with the tinniest smile and a deep sigh.

"You mean so much to me," he continued. "You helped me grow in countless ways – from my love of books and thirst for knowledge, to my ability to analyze and solve problems." He paused. "…you helped me be independent," he added glancing down.

After a moment, he spoke again quietly. "What meant the most to me was the unwavering faith you had in me, and the love you showed. You gave me strength I never knew I had, helping me get through the hardest times in my life... helping me survive. And I will never be able to thank you enough for that."

He gazed down at his mother and remembered all the times she read to him in the quiet of her bedroom. His mind raced through decades of written words in his head and settled on one sentence.

"'Daughter, you will be very welcome to my father, and to my mother, and to all my saints in heaven, for you have given them to drink very many times with the tears of your eyes.'" Spencer quoted.

"If there is a God, he's waiting to bring you home," he said, blinking the tears from his eyes. "I love you, mom, more than you will ever know."

He paused before he looked at over at Hotch. "Margery Kempe…she was her favorite author."

He saw Hotch give him a hint of a smile. "That strength she gave you…she'll help you get through this, too."

Spencer bowed his head and gave a small nod. He looked back at his mother once more before slowly rising to his feet. With Hotch at his side, they made their way back to the vehicles.

The group remained until Diana was taken away. Not much was said, but the presence of his friends helped Spencer as the coroner and his team came in to do their job.