Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition Season 7—Round 1

Team: Holyhead Harpies
Position: Captain
Task: Write about a character talking their way out of a situation

Word Count: 2,946

"It's not the biggest, is it?"

"Excuse me? It's plenty big enough!"

"Hmm. Personally, I think she'll be expecting bigger."

"Oh, jog on! She's not superficial like that. And besides, it isn't the size that matters, it's the… sentiment."

"Right. Keep telling yourself that, mate."

"Well, it's not like I can do anything about it now, can I?"

"You could use an Engorgement Charm?"

"No, she'll know… And anyway, it's too valuable; I wouldn't want to risk it."

"She'll have to look at this for the rest of her life."

"So?"

"So… girls want big, mate! Huge!"

"Not Lily. Lily loves me. That's all that matters."

"Well, you can be bloody sure she loves you if she acts pleased when she sees… that."

"Shut up."

"Look, maybe in a certain light… Oi, just let me touch it!"

James snapped the lid of the ring-box shut just centimetres away from Sirius' greedy outstretched fingers. "I scraped together every last knut I have!" he hissed. "And plenty of knuts I don't have! I had to get a loan from a rather shady goblin round the back of Gringotts, and I may or may not have vowed to give him my first-born child if I don't pay it back within a year."

Sirius looked impressed by James' illicit transaction. It was a rare glimpse at the old James Potter. Rule-breaker extraordinaire. His partner in crime.

"I'm sure Lily will be thrilled when she hears that," Sirius said with a wicked grin.

"Not a word to Lily!" James insisted. "But I'll probably tell the guys about the proposal soon. I want to hear everybody's opinion."

Sirius smiled almost a little sadly. He already knew, even if James apparently didn't, that absolutely nobody else's opinion mattered on his impending proposal to Lily. James Potter's mind was made up, now and forever. He was desperately, hopelessly in love with Lily Evans, and no force on earth could possibly stop him from asking her to spend the rest of her life with him.

And then it would be Lily and James, he realised. Not Sirius and James. Not the Marauders. No. Lily and James. Together. Married. In a house. With a baby.

Well, if the goblin didn't get to it first…

Catching himself, Sirius forced the sadness from his expression until he was positively beaming. "They'll be on board," he assured his best friend. "Trust me."

"I do," James said with deep sincerity. "You're probably the only person I do wholeheartedly trust anymore. Well, except for Lily. And Moony and Wormtail. But… you know it's always been you, right?"

"The love of your life?" Sirius asked wickedly. "Your soulmate? The man you've harboured deep romantic feelings for since you first set eyes on his ruggedly sexy young self?"

"No," James scoffed, "I'm not Moony."

Sirius' eyes widened. "I knew it was you who started that rumour! Have you seen the things written in the boys' loos at Hogwarts because of that!?"

"Yeah," James snorted, some of the old wicked mirth back in his eyes once more. "I know—I'm the one who wrote most of them."

Sirius looked like he was about to hit him, but just like that, the laughter was gone from James' eyes and the sincerity returned.

"I mean whatever happens, you're the one I trust the most, okay? Hell, maybe even more than Lily—but don't tell her I said that!" he added quickly. His face turned grave once more, but something familiar glimmered in his eye. "It was always you, it was always us."

"I know," Sirius said quietly. Maybe he thought James and Lily were young and dumb, and romance was lame, and soulmates weren't even real, and why, why, would you ever want to tie yourself down to just one person for the rest of eternity?—but like his best friend had said, for Sirius, it had always been James. It had always been them.

"But save the lame sappy stuff for Lily, yeah?" Sirius said, perking up and instantly dissipating the serious atmosphere they'd suddenly sunk into. He slapped a hand onto James' shoulder. "And are you sure you don't want to splurge on a slightly bigger diamond? I can't even see my rugged good looks in this thing!"

James rolled his eyes, but he was smiling once more. "I don't have any more I could possibly splurge; I'm already one unborn child down!"

"Well," Sirius began with a wicked grin, "let's hope Lily's impressed by small things. Just wait 'til she sees—"

But James had already hit him before he could finish.

"I can't believe you talked us into this, I can't believe you talked us into this, I can't believe you talked us into this!"

"Moony, shut it," Sirius hissed, from where he was perched rather unceremoniously behind an oversized ornate vase. "You've been saying that since we got here."

"Yes," Remus Lupin hissed, "because I can't believe you talked us into this!"

Unlike his old school friend, Peter Pettigrew seemed less perturbed by the situation Sirius had talked them into, and was rather enjoying the thrill of it all.

Lily and James had just left their room, and Sirius and the Marauders were about to make their move. Sirius' eyes followed the retreating head of bright red hair as it disappeared down the corridor, a twinkle in his eye.

"You don't think they saw us, do you?" Remus asked worriedly, starting to get cramp in his leg from where he was crouched just behind Sirius.

Rather than responding to his disgruntled pal, Sirius was stealthily creeping along the corridor towards the door the young couple had just departed from. "Alohomora," he whispered, producing his wand from seemingly thin air.

"Magic?" Remus asked. "We're using magic? No one said anything about magic!"

"Calm down, Moony, we're not in school anymore," Sirius answered with a smirk, pushing the unlocked door open with ease. Peter eagerly followed him, whilst Remus regarded him with discontent before he too entered the room. Sirius was right, after all, and he couldn't condemn him.

"So what, exactly, are we supposed to be doing here?" he asked, unimpressed with the antics of the boys he had hoped would have started to grow up since leaving Hogwarts earlier that summer.

Sirius clapped his hands together as he scanned the modest but elegant room, the mischievous twinkle in his eye only seeming to deepen. "I just want to… you know… spruce it up a bit for the happy couple." He walked over to the queen-sized bed, the focal point of the room, his ominous words hanging in the air.

"And what," Remus asked disapprovingly, "does that mean?"

But before Sirius could answer, all three boys were drawn to the large bay window on one side of the room, or rather the view out of it, taken aback by awe. Outside the window of Lily and James' romantic getaway was a beautiful view of sprawling countryside and a vast lake so eerily reminiscent of the one at Hogwarts that all three boys felt a nostalgic lump form in their throat.

Time paused for just a moment as they took in the beauty of the place James had chosen to propose to Lily.

"I guess he did good after all," Sirius said, apologetically impressed. He had been less than enthusiastic when James had told the other Marauders about his big plans regarding Lily. A countryside bed and breakfast, he'd told them eagerly.

Sirius had his own vision of how James should pop the big question, and he'd wanted it to be as dramatic and coordinated as any big scheme the Marauders had pulled off in their time at Hogwarts. He'd wanted deception, and hijinks, and a big reveal. But James has insisted on there being absolutely no magic and no nonsense—just him and Lily on a romantic getaway where he could take her outside to a beautiful location and ask her to spend the rest of her life with him.

Sirius had just stared at him in disbelief. He knew better than to argue with James but he had already let his mind wander to all the possibilities. Prongs would appreciate it, he reassured himself. In the moment, he'd be so happy about getting engaged that it wouldn't matter what extras Sirius provided to make the moment as special as possible.

As Sirius looked out at the view so reminiscent of the scenery they'd spent their childhood surrounded by, about a month after that conversation, he felt a surge of respect for James' insistence on simplicity. "He did good," he repeated wistfully.

"So, err, what exactly is it we're supposed to be… doing?" Peter asked nervously, glancing around the room.

Sirius' attention was drawn back to the challenge at hand. "I just want to spruce it up a bit, you know? Make it special. Prongs needn't know we were even here." He walked over and regarded the bed. "I'm not doing anything crazy, you know? Just a few rose petals, maybe, some champagne—ooh, I could enchant a harp to play romantic music whilst they… you know."

Peter blushed. Remus raised an eyebrow. "Whilst they…?"

Sirius indicated to the bed with a smirk. "You know, celebrate their engagement. Ooh, that's a good idea, actually," he muttered to himself eagerly, producing his wand once more. "Silencing Charm."

"Sirius!" Remus spluttered, mortified.

"Oh, come on, don't be such a prude, Moony, it's just s—"

"Oh my god, they're coming back!"

The three Marauders all looked sharply toward the door they'd left ajar, where unmistakable voices could be heard getting louder and louder. Sirius' blood turned cold. "Quick—the wardrobe," he commanded, unceremoniously shoving Remus towards the built-in doors he sincerely hoped led to a wardrobe big enough for them to hide in before the other boy could even begin to protest.

"What about me?" Peter hissed, panic setting in.

"Under the bed," Sirius commanded.

After a panicked shuffle, and a lot of swearing on Sirius' part, the Marauders were in place.

"I could have sworn I'd locked this," Lily's unmistakable voice could be heard as she re-entered the room. "Oh, no, no, you go on ahead, I'll meet you down there," she insisted, presumably to James.

A door clicked.

Sirius' blood had turned cold. What was Lily doing? Why had she come back?

"Sirius," Remus suddenly hissed as quietly as he could. "You are stood on my foot."

"Shut it, Moony!" he managed to spit back, praying the wooden doors were thicker than they seemed.

Lily's alarmed exclamation let them know that they were not. "Oh my god, whoever or whatever's in there, I'm armed, and I might seem small and incompetent, but I can assure you, I'm not, and—"

"Lily, stop, it's us," Sirius exclaimed, shoving the wardrobe's doors open and tumbling out in a panic, Remus almost falling on top of him as he did so.

Remus, after having straightened up and brushed himself down, offered an apologetic smile to the furious and confused redhead. "Err, hi, Lily."

"What the hell is going on?" Lily demanded shrilly. A tone of voice Sirius was all too familiar with.

"Lil!" he cried in surprised delight. But already the former Head Girl looked unconvinced. "I, uh, funny story actually—"

"Sirius, just… tell her the truth," Remus interrupted, sensing that Sirius was about to weave an elaborate web of lies to cover up the real reason they were there.

Lily's stern eyes flickered between both Sirius and Remus and their dishevelled appearances. "No," she said firmly. "I understand perfectly."

Sirius and Remus shared a look.

"You, err, you do?" Sirius asked innocently.

Lily's face was sour, and the boys could only imagine how angry James would be once Lily inevitably told them about their presence on his romantic getaway weekend. Especially if Lily really had figured out what it was all about.

"You guys just don't grow up, do you?"

Again, Sirius and Remus shared a look. "Uh…?"

"James can't go one weekend without you all hanging around? Seriously? I bet you've booked the room next door, haven't you? He promised me a romantic weekend, just us. Not me, him, and his bunch of idiot friends! No offence, Remus," she added quickly.

"Oh, no," Remus said meekly, "it's fine…"

"Where's Peter?" Lily suddenly demanded, hands on her hips.

"What?"

"Well, he's obviously here too."

"Well, actually—" Sirius began. Remus went to interrupt him, but the other boy made a motion to silence him. "No, no, no, Moony, let me explain the situation to dear Lily here; she needs to know the truth."

Remus regarded him with deep suspicion but allowed him to continue. Telling the truth would reveal James' planned proposal, which would ruin the whole surprise, and he couldn't do that to Lily. He respected her too much. But he couldn't see how Sirius could possibly justify why they would happen to be not only at the same location as the oblivious couple, but also hiding in their wardrobe.

"Lily," Sirius began calmly, "James does not know we're here, and I promise you that."

Remus relaxed slightly. Maybe Sirius would be able to talk their way out of the situation without uttering a single lie.

Lily's eyes were narrowed but her apparent curiosity urged him on.

"He really doesn't," Sirius insisted. "And, actually, I'd rather appreciate you didn't, uh, mention this to him. It was kind of… a secret."

Lily's suspicion deepened. "So why are you here?"

Sirius flung his arms out wide. "Why not? Who doesn't love a holiday?"

"Oh, sure," Lily said sarcastically, "and you two just happen to be holidaying at a romantic countryside estate the same weekend me and James are?"

"He recommended it," Sirius continued with ease. "Thought we'd check it out. We obviously had no idea you'd be here at this exact weekend, but these things happen, right?"

Lily folded her arms. "No," she said coolly. I've no idea what, exactly, is going on here, but I am not happy about it. I just"—she let out a cry of frustration—"I really thought for just once he was putting me first. That we were doing something together! That he'd grown up."

Remus, who had been silent since he'd decided to rely on Sirius to try and talk them out of their situation, suddenly sent the boy a look of warning.

"James doesn't know we're here, Lily; I honest to God swear that's the truth. We're not here for James. We're here for…" He glanced around the room, searching for something to work with, when his eyes fell on none other than one of his very close friends. "We're here for us," he boldly declared, reaching for Remus' hand.

The other boy instinctively recoiled, but Sirius gripped his hand tightly and raised his eyebrows at him. Where he was going with this, Remus couldn't be sure, but he still thought it in their best interests to just give Sirius free rein of whatever ridiculous story he could concoct. He'd seen him do it a thousand times at Hogwarts—talk them out of the most incriminating situations—but Lily would be harder to deceive.

Lily's bright green eyes widened as she glanced at the boys' entwined hands. "I… oh," she exclaimed, blushing slightly. "As in…?"

Sirius nodded. Remus just looked at him in confusion.

"Exactly, Lil, and we'd appreciate it if you didn't spread this around."

"I, uh, I just, I'm so sorry," she apologised. "I never… I never even thought… Well, I mean, obviously there were all those rumours, but I never actually thought for a second that—"

"Wait?" Remus interrupted. "What rumours?"

Sirius had clenched his teeth. If he weren't doing this for James he would have killed him.

"Let's not make a big deal out of it, yeah, Lil?" Sirius asked, still gripping his friend's hand tightly. "Especially not to James."

"Oh, of course," Lily assured them. "I wouldn't. You know I wouldn't."

"Right then," Sirius said. "So you'll keep our secret, yeah?"

Lily looked taken aback. "Well, of course, you can trust me! You know you can."

Sirius just continued to beam at her. Remus kept his lips pursed, silently seething.

"Okay, well," Lily began awkwardly, apparently now desperately eager to escape the situation herself. "I, err, I just came back for my purse, so I'll… I'll see you around."

"Ah," Sirius said, holding up a finger, "or will you?"

Lily laughed uneasily. "Oh, no, of course not!" she went along. "I, ah, I didn't see you here! I don't know anything." She attempted what Sirius and Remus could only assume was a wink. It was hard to tell. They'd never seen it from Lily.

She cleared her throat awkwardly. "Well, uh… enjoy your afternoon!" She gave a small wave as she backed towards the door.

"You too!" Sirius cooed, raising both his and Remus' clutched hands in farewell.

Lily eventually disappeared from view, her eyes repeatedly glancing back towards the odd couple in confusion.

"She totally bought it," Sirius said through gritted teeth, still grinning and waving, despite Lily seeming to have departed.

"Can we please stop holding hands now?" Remus demanded.

"Can I come out now?" a small voice piped up from under the bed.

But before Sirius could allow either to do any such thing, a furious redhead had stormed back into the room. "Wait one second," she growled, furious heat radiating from her entire being, "this is our room! And why were you in the wardrobe!?"

Sirius opened his mouth.

Remus sighed.

Peter sneezed from beneath the bed.

"Well," Sirius began chirpily, "Here's the thing, Lil…"