A/N: I do not own ANYTHING from Bungie's "Destiny" franchise. Characters such as Cayde-6, Amanda Holliday, and the Colonel, are not my creative product. However, Holly Hawk and Perry are my original characters which I created for the purpose of this fic. Please enjoy the silliness of my humor and let me know what you think by leaving a comment. :)

Chapter 1

{ENTRY 1}

My name is Holly, but most people call me "Holly Hawk".

Yes. Yes, it's exactly what you're thinking—a play on words.

I'm not sure exactly how they came up with the name, but it stuck with me.

My best bet is that my eyes are yellow...like...like a hawk.

And my hair is holly berry red.

OFF TOPIC, Holly!

Anyhow, I'm making this entry because someone needs to know what I've accomplished.

I'm mad, but I'm gloriously proud.

Okay. Okay. Okay. I'll start from the beginning.

I have a friend...a mentor—I don't know what to call him—who loves to play pranks on me.

Yesterday he stole my diary and indulged himself in reading parts of it over the PA system.

Bad move, Cayde-6!

So naturally, I did what a girl does best: retaliation.

Let's just say...I got even.

{END OF ENTRY}

The Tower/Courtyard

Pre-Cabal takeover

1300 hrs/4 months ago

"Alright Perry, that should do it for your shell up grade."

I gave my ghost a once over and grinned as I sat the old, green shell in my lap. "Lord Shaxx would be very proud to see you in this Crucible shell," I teased, "very macho!" Perry tentatively twitched his geometric pieces before making a complete rotation around his optic. As he did this, the new red and white paint glistened in the afternoon sunshine. Piecing himself back together, the little ghost gave me his version of a wink.

"Very nice," he nodded, "I like it."

"Perfect!" I shouted in excitement. "Now that you have your new shell, can we please go—" Before I could finish my sentence the Tower's PA system clicked on and screeched five second's worth of feedback.

A jolt of pain leapt through me as I covered my ears.

"Excuse me? Is—is this thing on? Oh, it's live?" I laughed as I realized it was the familiar voice of the Hunter-Vanguard—Cayde-6. "Crap!" The mic screeched with feedback again before someone told him he was standing too close to the PA system. "Attention! Attention!" Cayde's voice sounded playful, but those who knew him understood he was frustrated. "To whomever stole my sparrow: I'm gonna get ya!"

The mic squealed again.

"Wha–? Waddya mean I can't threaten people over the PA?" The mic clicked three times before he spoke again. "I'm gonna be on the PA system every hour on the hour until the thief turns himself—herself—in. Ya got that? Cayde-6 out!" The PA system cut out and it was for the first time that I realized both Guardian and Vendor had stopped what they were doing. Gentle murmurs started between them all like whispers, until the voices went back to their normal decibels.

Perry sighed before he looked back to me, "Are you sure you want to do this?" An evil grin graced my lips and I knew I was committed. "Yes, Perry. I'm serious about doing this. Besides, we're already in too far." My ghost shook himself dejectedly. "You still want me to record this?" he practically groaned.

"Yes. I. Do." I replied smugly.

"Fine, Holly. But for the record, I wasn't a part of this scheme. You better let Cayde know that," he scolded.

I hopped off the terrace ledge which overlooked the city below. I held up the old, green shell and watched as Perry spirited it away. "Whatever you say, Peridot!" Perry made a noise that sounded like he had short circuited before retorting, "Perry! My name is Perry."

"Don't sweat it, Perry-digm," I shot back cheekily.

"Ugh!" he complained.

"Hey, when was the last time you heard from your siblings: 'Perry-nickel' and 'Perry-quarter'?"

"Alright! That's it—," he said agitatedly before winking out.

"Oh, come on! Can't you take a joke?"

I chuckled knowing Perry wouldn't reply to my terrible jokes. He usually didn't. Sighing contentedly, I started my journey down to the docking bay where I knew I would find Amanda—the Shipwright. I spent the next several hours helping her prep and dismantle a red and black sparrow. "So...what did ya say was wrong with this sparrow, again?" Amanda drawled, her eyebrow shooting up inquisitively.

"I didn't," I flashed her my best grin.

"Okay, I'll bite," she said while setting down her blackened grease rag. "Why did you have me dismantle a perfectly good sparrow in the last three hours?" I felt my smile falter for a moment before turning away from her with a sigh.

"Trust me when I say, 'you don't want to know'."

"As much as I don't want to, I think I need to Holly," Amanda spoke with a serious twang. I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and turned to look at her with a devious twinkle in my eye.

"Don't say I didn't tell you so," my voice said rather darkly. Before she could inquire, I walked over to the heap of sparrow parts. With my black boot, I started lazily shuffling through the parts until I found what I wanted. I made sure to look into her eyes as I turned the part over with my boot. I didn't say a word as the horror of realization struck her. Her ocean blue eyes suddenly went large and overly white as she pointed shakily to the dismantled sparrow.

"I—I—" she stammered.

"Don't worry, Amanda. I'll make sure he knows I did it. Hehe," I chuckled nervously.

Perry reappeared over the sparrow heap, "Oh dear. You've really done it this time, Holly."

"Come on Perry. Transmat the pieces and let's skedaddle." Walking over to Amanda, I patted her on the shoulder. "I owe you one, Amanda," I winked.

I took off running with Perry following suit and Amanda still in shock. I felt bad for doing that, but it had to be done. "Cayde deserves it," I told myself. Perry and I ran hard—well...floated. Perry can't run. Anyhow, we made it quickly to the Vanguard hall with only a minute to spare. By the time I stalked into the room, Cayde was making his way to the far-right corner where the PA system sat unattended.

The Hunter-Vanguard looked to his left and right, quickly assessing the risk, and picked up the mic. Cayde pressed a button here and there before flipping a red switch. "Attention! Attention! This is the fourth hour in which my sparrow has gone missing," Cayde announced. "I want my bike!" he yelled, stomping his foot for emphasis.

Before I could stalk closer, I caught the caramel-brown eyes of Ikora Rey watching my every step. She was silent and regal like a cat who's found its prey. I flashed my best smile at the Warlock as I put my pointer finger to my lips. She shook her head and I knew then, she understood what was happening. I returned my attention to Cayde and stopped about ten feet away. "Perry," I whispered softly. My ghost appeared in a wink and I told him to start recording.

"Maybe, just maybe, I angered a few people at last night's poker party. But I won fair and square," Cayde said, stabbing his metal finger into the desk in front of him.

I watched as Cayde began threatening the guardian who stole his sparrow over the intercom. I know I can't see myself, but I'm pretty sure there's a twinkle of dark delight flashing across my eyes as Cayde happens to glance over his shoulder to find me there.

"Perry," I say deviously, "would you do me the honor?"

I stretch out my hand giving a thumbs down. My ghost sighs in disappointment as he knows his previous rants went through one ear and out the other. Cayde continued to speak into the mic until my ghost transmatted every last piece of Cayde's sparrow onto the floor in an unceremonious heap. I know Exo's don't have bowels, but I swear I could hear the tinkling of washers and bolts hit the floor. This was it, this was my declaration of war. If I had been smart, then I would have realized then that this would be my undoing.

"Checkmate," I said cockily.

The PA system clicked off right as Cayde dropped the mic.

The Tower/Hangar
0530 hrs/Current Day

You know the most annoying and yet wonderful thing about my mentor is that I'm always waiting on him. Cayde-6 that is. This morning was just like any other ordinary day (I thought), but I was oh-so-wrong. The clock had finally struck 0530 hours and Cayde was not at his post. Not even the Colonel was around to peck at my boots like he normally did.

I tapped my foot anxiously, arms crossed, as I surveyed the new hangar. Looking up and across the way, I saw into the window of Future War Cult's (FWC) new office. For a moment I found Lakshmi-2 staring out the window, locking her critical eyes with mine. I nodded politely before looking away.

To the right of me I heard the brain-rattling whir of a saw greedily biting into the metal of a sparrow. Amanda, the blonde shipwright, was bent over her new project sending a shower of sparks flying out on all sides. It didn't take a genius to know how much Amanda loved her job. I think that's my favorite part about her. She might be constantly busy, but she always has a smile on her face. It never seemed to fade, even when covered in grease. I felt a smile tug at my lips, she was easily one of my best friends around here.

I sighed as I looked at the time once more. "Oi! Amanda!" I yelled at her, watching as she unplugged the saw. Lifting up her work helmet, she regarded me with a nod to show she was listening.

"Where's your boyfriend at?!"

Maybe it was what I said, but suddenly Amanda turned into a professional juggler. I laughed as the saw tossed itself precariously between her hands until she caught hold of it. Amanda gave me her worst stink eye before chucking her helmet at me. I ducked expertly and came to a halt as a metal ting came from behind me.

Amanda went pale and suddenly became very interested with a wrench she picked up from her tool tray. I stood up and slowly turned around to find Cayde tugging at the helmet his exo-horn had unexpectedly impaled.

"Ummm...hi!" I said with an awkward wave. Cayde narrowed his optics at me. "Nice to see you getting along with—ugh—Amanda...," Cayde grunted as he worked the helmet free from his horn. "Umm...sorry about your helmet, Amanda. I'll—I'll get you a new one."

"You mean steal one?" she yelled while bent over the sparrow.

Cayde looked at me and shrugged, "Steal? Steal? I would never. You really think that I—Cayde—would stoop so low? I am many things, but a thief is not...why—why are you looking at me like that?" I looked over at Amanda and found the spunky shipwright with a fist on her hip while pointing her biggest wrench in his direction. "Okay, okay," Cayde said with his hands up, "I typically reallocate necessities to better...causes—Okay! Not the point. I'm here to talk with Holly and not get an ear full from you. Man! You're way too chatty this morning," he joked cheekily.

I watched as Amanda's eyes narrowed and I dodged as she chucked her wrench at Cayde's head. This time the exo was prepared and he ducked too, but we were all unprepared for the biggest screech from the Colonel. The wrench clanked by him as it skittered off, scaring the feathers off his tail. "Sorry lil' guy," Amanda yelled remorsefully with her southern twang. The Colonel didn't seem to notice Amanda as he zeroed in on Cayde; clucking angrily before running off.

"Oh great! Now the Colonel's mad at me," Cayde sighed, throwing his arms up dejectedly.

"So...," I started, "What did you want me for?"

"Me? Want you?" Cayde asked as he pointed to himself and back to me. "Well, gee. I'm flattered," he spoke as he went to scratching the back of his hood, "but that's not why I—"

"Cayyyyyde!" I yelled embarrassedly as a wave of heat washed over my cheeks. I shoved his shoulder for full effect, but it didn't seem to faze him as he laughed like a hyena. Cayde's vocals flashed on and off with every laugh accentuated with a burnt-yellow glow. "As much as I enjoy...whatever this is," I said gesturing between us, "I'm here for the mission you messaged me about." The Hunter-Vanguard sighed delightedly before patting a weighty hand on my shoulder causing my knees to slightly buckle.

"I'm just messing with ya, Kid," he chuckled while wiping a pretend tear away from his eye. "Besides, you're not my type. There's only one woman for me." As he said this, a poker card appeared in his right hand. Cayde took a moment before flipping the card around with his pointer and thumb. "Good ol' faithful," Cayde feigned dreamily, "My 'Queen of Hearts'."

Somewhere in the background a tool hit the floor with a metal clank. "She's due for a check-up you know!" Amanda yelled with annoyance. "I saw her in the bay yesterday with some scoring on her flank! What were you thinking not bringing her to me?" Cayde sighed deeply before turning to the blonde shipwright. "Cut me some slack. I'm down on glimmer this week."

"Then get off yer' hind quarters and help me out in the shop. Perhaps you can work back all that glimmer you lost last night," she nagged.

"You know something, you're a piece of work," he shot back.

I watched amusedly as the two hurled insults back and forth like an intense crucible match. As much as they pretended to be at each other's throat, I knew it wasn't real. There was more there than the two were willing to admit. I sighed before standing between them, arms held out. "Girls! Girls! You're both pretty. Can I go on a mission now?"

Amanda rolled her blue eyes and went back to grumbling at the sparrow in front of her. Cayde snapped his attention back to me before looking at an imaginary wrist watch. "Well, would you look at the time. Let's send you on your way, Cupcake!" Before I could reply, the cheeky Exo ushered me away to the docks with his arm around my shoulder. If Cayde-6 ever had a "tell", then it would be this exact gesture.

He's planning something...but what?