A/N: Okay, so this just had to come out of my head. It is very loosely proofread by myself, so I apologize for any mistakes in advance. I hope you enjoy, I just couldn't get this angsty scene out of my head and had to write it my way... Also, take a listen to Animal by Chase Holfelder. It's the perfect mood for this scene.

What You Deserve

She almost said it. Almost. She couldn't finish saying that four letter word, not when he was looking at her like that. Pleading her not to say it, while at the same time challenging her to finish it. To say she loved him. Pierce. Chloe stopped herself from saying it, not because she didn't want to hurt Lucifer, but because she wasn't entirely sure it was truly how she felt. It was hard to think about loving Marcus while Lucifer was standing before her, broken. It had been a while since she had seen him this vulnerable; since she had seen his dark eyes rimmed in red, his pain so evident.

"We're done here," Chloe said firmly, giving him one last look before turning around to head out of the interrogation room, her breath shaking as if walking away would be the end of something.

"No, we're not," Lucifer said, his voice as loud as hers, but not nearly as steady or secure. Chloe took a deep breath before turning around to face him, blinking back the well of tears desperately trying to fall down her cheeks. "Say it." Chloe stood frozen, the five feet of distance between them felt like too little and too much at the same time. She was suffocating in the tension and longing for contact; she needed something to ground her.

"No," she managed to whisper, watching him take a few steps to be closer to her. He was stalking like a predator after prey, but his eyes were not dangerous, they were pained and frantic. She knew what he wanted to here, she let herself slip up a few moments ago and he was not going to let her off for it. He did not believe in pity, he required accountability for one's actions, even hers.

Lucifer stepped into her space, staring down at her with shattered, stony eyes. He could see that she was trembling just as much as he was. He tried not to enjoy that she was affected by him in the moment, but it was too comforting for him to care whether it was wrong or right. "Why not, Detective? You almost said it. Tell me how you feel about Pierce," he urged her, his voice quiet but his tone was commanding. She was so close, but he felt as if a film was covering the small space between them, keeping him from reaching out and holding on to her.

She hated how powerful olfactory responses were. The way he smelled was so undeniably him; as soon as she got the smallest whiff of smoky whiskey, spice, and fire, the images in her head were immediately of him. It had happened a few times with Marcus. If he had had whiskey, she would kiss him and Lucifer would appear in her mind, smiling at her and reaching for her. She wished she could tell him how frequently he haunted her thoughts like a very welcomed ghost.

"I can't," she said, her voice breaking with the crushing sensation of her heart. She did care for Pierce, she did want what he could offer: stability and normalcy. The man in front of her consumed her soul, he was nowhere near normal and far from a stable figure, but he made her feel alive in a cold, dead world. "Lucifer, please," she cried, taking a step back away from him towards the door.

He reached out and held onto her forearm with his hand, the heat of his palm warming her skin through her jacket. "Say it, Detective. Tell me that you love him," he demanded, pulling her back close to him. Chloe closed her eyes and shook her head. She couldn't look any him anymore. She would break in half if she did. Her head was already swimming with the scent of him and the pull of her heart in two different directions. She tried to walk away again, but he moved them so she had her back against the wall.

It took everything out of him to not press his body into hers, the few inches between them felt like a magnetic field trying to pull him to her with a force stronger than he could imagine. "I can't say it," she whispered again, opening her eyes and looking up at him, wishing he could read her mind, just this once. She couldn't say it, not to him. She couldn't watch him try not to react. She saw a glimpse of a reaction when she almost said it. Saying it would just tear at an already open wound, and she would fall apart if she had to see what she could do to him.

Lucifer said nothing, he just stood in front of her, trembling, his eyes glossy and black. Before she could say anything else, he bent down and pressed his lips against hers. The kiss was gentle and determined. He let his body press lightly into hers, taking his hand away from her arm so he could cup her face, thumbs tracing the spot where her eyelashes touched her cheeks. "Is this the reason? You can't say it because he doesn't make you feel like this?" he breathed out, pressing his forehead against hers.

Chloe let out the breath she had been forced to hold as she tried to keep her mind from racing. She wasn't experiencing those cheesy, cliché sparks that you're supposed to feel when kissing the boy of your dreams, no, she was experiencing what it felt like to burn from the inside, to want something so bad while knowing you shouldn't. She didn't answer him, she just tried to keep herself alive under his touch, to force her heart to still beat after that shock.

Frustrated with her lack of response, he tilted her face up, forcing her to look at him directly. The air they shared turned thick with straining energy from unresolved feelings. He could see it in her eyes, she didn't want to hurt him, but he didn't want her pity. He wanted her to tell him that she loved Pierce, then, maybe, he could learn to live with their relationship. He wanted, more than anything, to be able to admit what he was feeling. He couldn't, though, for how could he tell her when he couldn't even explain it to himself?

He bent down and kissed her again, less gently but just as determined. This was the only way he could get his point across. Talking and expressing emotions was not something he knew how to do, actions are what he did best. He felt her mouth part for him and he slid his tongue into her inviting mouth. He heard his own pained groan as he tasted her tongue, smooth muscles sliding wetly in a sensual dance. He pulled away from her, looking down at her as she kept her eyes closed, refusing to meet his gaze.

"Tell me, does he make you feel like this?" he asked, a manic worry setting in. She wasn't saying she loved him, wasn't saying he made her feel the same way, but she wasn't denying it either. It had to be something, and he was not in the frame of mind to try and read between the lines.

"I don't know," she said, her own frustration growing. She shut her eyes even tighter, her hands forming fists at her side. He knew what he was doing, and she was angry that it affected her the way he hoped. She was mad she wasn't stronger, that she wasn't able to deny him, but she couldn't. His pull on her was on a chemical level, and she couldn't stop it, not when he looked like he might just fall apart before her eyes.

"You don't know?" he questioned, letting his hands fall down her body to rest along her hips. His teeth were grinding inside his mouth, all of it was becoming too much. All the manipulation from his father, fucking Cain barging in and ruining his partnership with Chloe, as well as everyone's sympathetic looks when they saw Pierce and Chloe together. It was all too much, and she didn't even know if Pierce made her feel the way he made her feel? Well, of course, she didn't know how he could make her feel. She had never let him show her how he felt. She always wanted words, and she had to know, by now, that expressing feelings was not something he could do.

"Why do you care, Lucifer?" she asked, her tone getting firm. "You won't answer my question either. Why do you care?" Chloe waited for his response, but received nothing. The red around his eyes darkened, the glossiness of the blackened brown only increasing his obvious hurt. He looked so torn, so unable to get his point across. She knew she was asking the impossible from him, but if he wanted her to walk away from the normal life Marcus could give her, she would need more than the admiring looks he gave her.

"I've told you, Detective," he started, his grip on her hips growing stronger, pulling her closer against him. "He's not good enough."

"Then who is?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She reached up and grabbed the lapels of his jacket, forcing him to look at her directly. He couldn't move or shift away from this question. He didn't answer; he gave her one last pleading look before capturing her mouth again. He sucked on her bottom lip, gentleness gone and pure desperation seeping through. He shifted his body to the side, keeping one leg between hers and wrapping one hand around the back of her neck, the other moving from her hip to her stomach.

"You deserve a man who will worship the very ground you step on, to uphold himself to the highest standards for you," he started, his fingers just barely moving under the hem of her shirt. Chloe turned her head to look up at him, his gaze blazing into her eyes while his hand traced circles on her skin. "You deserve a man who will tremble just from the grace of your touch," he whispered, a small gasp parting his lips as he unbuttoned her jeans and pulled the zipper down slowly.

He took in a shaky breath, his eyes closing for a second before revealing dark, glassy pupils, completely blown with desire. Chloe's breath hitched as his fingers began to slip past her underwear, traveling oh-so-slowly to the destination they both were after. "Pierce won't be that for you. He won't give you his reins, to use or release when you need to." His was voice soft against the shell of her ear, billowing like smoke and tingling down her spine. Her grip on his lapels tightened as she used them to help hold herself up while on shaky legs.

Lucifer let his fingers slide down, his middle finger brushing over her clit, causing her to jump, but he didn't stop. He let his fingers slip between her folds, gathering the plethora of wetness there. He groaned at the feeling, pressing fevered kisses against her jawline as his continued to move through her, gathering as much of her arousal as his could. "You deserve a man who can fulfill your every need or want, letting that fulfillment be his ultimate desire," he continued, his breath shaky as he started to circle her clit with slick fingers.

Chloe let her eyes fall closed, reveling in the sensation of a hot hand working her swollen skin. His skin was so hot and it provided a feeling that she had never experienced before. Heat causing more and more arousal to start pooling, his fingers expertly gathering it and using it to full advantage. She missed the heat as his hand trailed away from her, moving up to press wet fingers against her lips. "A man who would willingly feast off only your taste for eternity," he said, leaning forward and pressing his lips and tongue against hers, his fingers between them. He parted her lips with his tongue, the wet muscle and fingers sliding in at the same time. She tasted him and herself on his skin, an intoxicating concoction of familiar. He groaned as he tasted her, pressing his hardened arousal into her side subconsciously.

He continued to kiss into her mouth, absorbing their muffled moans as he slipped his hand back down between her thighs, running digits through her swollen folds. He slid two long fingers inside of her to his last knuckles, sighing sweet relief into her mouth. "A man who would die a thousand deaths just to feel you wrapped around him, even if only once." He moved his fingers in and out a few times before sliding them back in and curling around her anatomy, stroking that spongy spot inside of her that made her eyes roll.

Chloe bit her bottom lip, trying to keep herself upright between Lucifer and the wall. She tried to ignore how hot and hard he felt beside her, how badly she wanted to feel more of him, how much she needed more of him. She was already so close, his fingers moving and pressing into her in slow, strong strokes. He pulled out once again, his fingers dragging up to press against her clit. His hand on the back of her neck tightened, forcing her to look back up at him. He pressed his forehead into hers, keeping his eyes open and locked on hers as he started rubbing small circles against the sensitive bundle of nerves.

She could feel his breath flutter her eyelashes, his pants coming out hot against her skin. She moved her hands off of his jacket, grabbing the collar of his shirt just to be closer to his skin. She fisted the white material as he continued his small circles, varying pressure and speed to keep her body guessing. "You deserve a man who can make you feel like this for as long as you want," he said, bending down to press a kiss to the skin below her ear. "Who can give and take whatever you need him to."

Chloe felt her eyes close again but was quickly made to open them again when Lucifer grabbed a handful of her hair and forced her face towards his. He kept them separated, his eyes wandering her features as she tried to maintain eye contact. Her body was beginning to shake, the longing sensation that had been coiling inside of her was beginning to tremor, ready to spring. Her mouth fell open, her breaths coming in forceful pants, her head spinning with the overwhelming feeling burning between her thighs.

"You deserve a man who craves your pleasure more than his own," his face went slack, his hand circling her with more pressure, steady peace, and complete confidence in its ability. His eyes were pleading, begging her to fall over the edge, to let him take her over and coax her through the waves. With a final breath, she felt the dam inside her break, releasing a torrent of pleasure she didn't know she could muster. She held her stare with him and she could swear she saw tears forming in his eyes, just making it to the brim before being swallowed back down into the dark depths. No one had ever looked at her that way. With pure desire and emotional need.

His body was vibrating as much as hers, letting his fingers slide back down to her entrance, feeling how tight she had become after her orgasm. He groaned as his finger circled around the swollen opening, pulling his hand away and capturing her lips with his. He gently sucked on her bottom lip, nibbling the skin before releasing her. They breathed the same air for a few moments, Chloe's grip on his collar remaining, but Lucifer let his hands fall to his sides. He bowed his head down and tried to step back, an apologetic expression on his face.

"No," she whispered, pulling him back to her by her grip on his shirt. He allowed her to pull him closer, turning them around so he was backed against the wall. He kept his eyes down, not looking at her, so she brought one hand up, pressed it to his cheek and turn him to look at her. "We're not done here," she stated, standing on her toes and pulling him down to attack his mouth. She forced her way into his mouth, her tongue caressing his as they danced inside their dark, wet caves. She bit his bottom lip, pulling back and licking a line over the top of his lips. He exhaled loudly, one of his hands gripping her side, the other tangling into her hair.

He was holding on to her as if he knew it would be the last time he would ever touch her. It was desperate and needy; the touch of a starving animal wanting to ease the pain of hunger while trying to control themselves and make their meal last as long as possible. She could feel his length, painfully hard, pressing into her hip and she ground against it. He let out pained moan as he kissed her temple.

"Give me what I need right now, Lucifer, please." She breathed against his lips, hot and wet. "Make me forget him." Chloe looked into his eyes, those ever darkening orbs, glossy and bottomless, and could see his internal conflict plainly. She could see how desperately he wanted this, her, but she could also see the hesitation. "Please, Lucifer, I need you."

And how could he deny her anything? He closed his eyes for a second, a low moan reverberated in his chest as he accepted her request and fought his own uncertainty. He walked them back until Chloe was sat onto the metal table in the center of the room, the cool metal shocking her heated skin. He bent down and took off one of her boots before reaching back up and forcefully pulling her jeans off of that leg, letting the material hang from the other leg. Her underwear had been taken with her jeans, hanging somewhere in the mess of denim on her clothed leg. He stood between her thighs, grabbing her ass and lifting her up. She let her legs hang by his sides and he walked them back over to the wall. He slammed her back against it, kissing her throat as he leveraged one hand to start undoing his belt and trousers.

Chloe could hear the clinking metal of his belt but she could only focus on the way his lips and tongue felt against her pulse. His teeth would graze the delicate skin, sending shivers down her body. Any thoughts regarding their location and the ridiculous number of rules they were breaking were pushed aside by his lips brushing over her chin and connecting with hers. She felt his body shift as he pushed his pants and underwear down to collect around his ankles.

Lucifer pulled back enough to look her directly in the eyes. He wet his lips, inhaling shakily as she gave him the smallest smile. Maintaining eye contact, he shifted her body again, holding her still exactly where he needed her. Chloe had never felt more safe or secure in her entire life. He held her firmly between himself and the wall, she never felt like she might slide or fall from his grasp. She was so sure that he could keep her right there, and she had never felt that assurance before, not when she had such little control. His hands spread wide underneath her thighs, fingers digging into the soft flesh of her ass as he lined himself with her entrance. She felt the ethereal heat of him immediately, gasping at bare skin touching her where she needed it.

"Fuck," he cursed under his breath, sliding her body down enough to allow him to thrust up and entomb himself completely inside of her. He leaned down, pressing his forehead into her shoulder, using his hips and one hand under her thigh to keep her up. His other hand was gripping her upper left arm, holding her steadily, and cherishing the moment.

Chloe's head fell back against the wall as she wrapped her arms around his neck and dug her fingers through the short hairs on the back of his head. Her nails scrapped along the skin, digging in deliciously when his lips were back on her neck. He started thrusting, slow and firm, his chest staying pressed into hers as his hips moved. She could feel him breathing hard into her neck, soft groans escaping his lips as his left wet trails all over her skin. She used her grip in his hair to pull his head back up to meet her gaze. She wanted to watch him more, see those irresistible expressions on his beautiful features.

"You deserve a man who will nearly fall apart once he finally earns the right to slide inside you," he panted, maintaining his steady rhythm. His hand on her arm moved up to cup the side of her face, thumb brushing along her teeth through parted lips. He thrust up into her as far as he could, trying to go just a little bit farther into her depths. Chloe's mouth opened fully, a loud moan falling from her throat as his thumb pet her tongue and his cock touched places inside her she didn't know a man could reach. "To bury himself so completely inside of your heat."

The delicious burn of his cock dragging in and out, stretching the malleable skin, subsided to blissful fullness. She wanted more than anything for that feeling to never leave her. She wished she could always have him look at her the way he was now: awe struck and passionate. His words continued to do their magic, as they always did. No, his mojo didn't work on her, but his voice still affected her in multiple ways. He looked so vulnerable in this disheveled state; somehow younger, even. He still looked every bit a man on a mission to prove his point.

"You deserve to be given everything a man can give you; body and soul," he praised, his pace quickening in a desperate need for friction. He buried his face into her chest, his breath pulsing hot air against her exposed skin. He licked and sucked along the curve of her breasts, inhaling her scent further. She could feel a second orgasm forming in her walls as they started to flutter around his length. She squeezed his sides with her thighs, pulling his face harder into her chest by his hair, earning a muffled moan from him. She took ragged breaths to match his against her sternum, and when he bit down into her soft flesh she exploded around him. The grip in his hair had to be painful, but he made no complaint as he plowed her through her climax, nibbling and kissing her décolletage as she came down.

"You make the most intoxicating sounds," he groaned as she continued to gasp for breath. He planted soft, short kisses along her neck, jaw, and chin before kissing the corner of her mouth. "The way you sound when you cum could bring a man to his knees." She moaned at his words, turning her head to kiss him fully. He was just as desperate for air as she was, yet his hold on her was just as strong as it had been. He kept himself still inside her, his throbbing erection gently reminding her of more to come. It was her turn. She needed to make him feel her, what she could do for him. She needed more of him and wanted to make him tremble the way he made her.

Chloe tightened her legs around his waist, digging her heels into the small of his back for leverage to grind against him. Lucifer groaned and walked them backwards, obliging her silent request for control. He gracefully sat into one of the chairs, giving her space to unwrap her legs before he fully slid onto the seat, still fully sheathed inside of her. This moment was everything he could have asked for. To have Chloe on his lap, hovering over him looking all the glorious woman she was, was something he could have never imagined in his eons of existence. All of he worries melted always in that moment, and for that, he would be eternally grateful, no matter the aftermath. He let his hands fall and dangle below the seat of the chair, waiting to do whatever she asked.

"I deserve a man who will take control and give it back when I want it," she breathed into his mouth, her tongue snaking in to tangle with his own. He sighed into her mouth, lifting his hands to let them hover in the air at her shoulders.

"Yes," he hissed, pressing his forehead to hers. His eyes were dark and beautifully dangerous as they stared into her blue orbs. With the level of the chair, she could place the balls of her feet on the ground, slightly uneven from one bare foot. She leaned into him, one hand gripping the back of the chair while the other held on to the back of his neck. She licked her lips and ground her hips experimentally, feeling the angles and depths she could take. His eyes fluttered closed as his mouth parted, one arm wrapped around her slender frame, pulling her even closer, the other landed on the side of her thigh, splayed and pressing into her flesh.

She started slow and smooth, rocking her hips and grinding into his body, letting her keep almost all of him inside of her at all times. Her clit would brush against his pelvis and she knew he could feel the way her muscles clamped down around him every time that little nerve bundle was stimulated by the way his chest would heave. She loved watching the fabric of his shirt stretch tight, rippling, over his chest. She bent down and kissed the skin that was available by the top button being undone. His skin was so hot against her lips and tongue and it only drove her movements harder against him.

"I want one more," she said, moving her hand from behind his neck to trace his lips before resting on his chest. Her blue eyes bore into his brown, their pupils heavily dilated with arousal, making their eyes almost black.

"You can have anything you want," he replied, his voice thick with desire. The hand on her thigh moved to grab her ass, pushing with her thrusts to make them even harder. His assistance caused her clit to rub against his body with every movement. She could feel herself coiling, the spring just waiting for the perfect amount of friction to release the pressure.

"And then, Lucifer, I deserve to watch you fall apart beneath me," she barely puffed out before her orgasm took over her. She arched her back, her hips grinding down in a hard, short pattern. Lucifer's mouth fell open at her movements, loving how wanton she looked on his lap.

"Yes," his response was barely audible, coming out in a breath of air as his eyes fluttered. She dug her fingers into his chest, her grip on the chair caused her hand to shake, and her whole body convulsed as she rode out her pleasure on his cock. She could see him looking at her in complete fascination, short moans falling from his perfect lips as she kissed him.

She could feel he was so close; his body tense and his breath was shaky. She started moving once her legs would let her, swollen flesh taking him in completely. She could feel the soreness already starting, but she relished in the sensation, knowing she would be able to feel him for a while. Quiet curses rolled off his tongue as he started to thrust up into her hips, clinging to her intensely. He bent his head down into the crook of her neck, allowing himself to breathe her in and taste her flesh at the same time. When his breaths became erratic and his hips faltered in their rhythm, she knew he was close to falling over the edge.

"Please, Lucifer, cum for me," she urged, whispering into his ear. As if by her command, he stiffened, a subdued groan vented from his throat as the tension started to tremble out of his body. His hold on her grew even tighter, almost to the point of painful, but Chloe embraced it and let herself mold to his form.

He held her down on to him, his whole body shaking as he came hard. She could feel his hard breaths against her neck as she tried to move, to give him some sort of friction to ride him through it. A choked moan rumbled from his chest as he shook his head against her, wrapping his arms even tighter around her, keeping her completely still until he fully emptied himself deep within her.

A moment had never felt so powerful. She could describe the feeling of him pulsing inside her, clinging on to her as if his life depended on it. The way his body shook with the force of his release and the sounds he made during it. Nothing else mattered in that moment; all that mattered was the way he felt under her, the way his breath against her skin took hers away.

Lucifer had never felt anything that strong, and it damn near scared him. The end was bittersweet: the striking dance between two hungry souls, ending in an earth-shattering crescendo. Poetic was the only word to describe their encounter. A beautifully tragic poem between two souls with everything working against them. He held her firm and close, not wanting to let go, in fear that it would be the last time.

She draped her arms around his neck, holding him near as his breathing lowered to long, ragged breaths, his arms still wrapped around her tightly. She continued to hold him, even though they had been in the interrogation room far too long. He wasn't ready to let go of this moment yet. She would give him all the time he needed. She knew he would give her anything she wanted, even his own life if she ever asked, so he deserved, at least, this much. The time to soak in every detail, to retain the feeling of being held by her, and to bask in the hope that he was everything that he felt she deserved. She held him close, tears forming in her eyes, because he deserved so much more than she could give.

A/N: I know... SUPER angsty, but also really smutty. haha. Let me know what you thought by leaving a review. I seriously love those. I hope you liked this, and I hope the mood and atmosphere really came off in this. As always, thanks Luni for allowing me to share my dirty thoughts and (try) to organize my mind. Until next time, dark ones...