I am currently in a phase of writer's block, so I have decided to repost a story I wrote more than six years ago while I was still in high school. I do not remember what it's about, only that it received many positive reviews. It was published under a different username (allibelievein), I removed it from the website about two years ago when I was afraid someone I knew was going to find it. That was a mistake.

I hope you enjoy the story. It is complete, and I will post the other chapters regularly. You won't have to wait long for updates. I hope that this inspires me to write something new soon.

Chapter 1

Bella POV

Today was supposed to be my last. All of my affairs were in order. My last letter was hidden in my desk drawer. It ended up being the ultimate betrayal, revealing my true intentions before it was supposed to. How was I supposed to know that Jacob would rescue me, guess my motives, and call Charlie? Jacob was so angry with me, and he told me our friendship was over.

I told Charlie that I jumped off the cliff for fun. That I thought it would be safe. That I didn't see the rocks at the bottom. That I didn't realize that the storm was making the water rage dangerously. That I thought I was strong enough. That I didn't know that it was that big of a deal.

These were all lies, and Charlie knew it. I will never forget the look on his face: a mixture of pain, sadness, shock, guilt, and, worst of all, irreparable disappointment. "Bella," he had said softly. "After Jacob called me, I looked through your bedroom, trying to find any evidence that your motives were what I suspected. And I found this." I stood frozen as he pulled a note from his pocket. My last letter.

"Ch-Dad. It's not what you think—" I had started.

"Isabella. You'd better stop lying. Right. Now." I'd never seen him like that before. His voice was rising and he had a murderous look in his eye. "Actually, you'd better stop talking all together. I'm through with you and your recklessness. You care for nobody but yourself. Go to your room. I'm calling your mother."

I didn't dare argue. I practically ran to my room, and that's where I am now.

As the afternoon quickly turned into night, I sat on my bed, deep in thought. The truth was, I had jumped off the cliff with intentions to end my life. I had nothing to live for. Edward, my one and only, had left with his family—my family—leaving me broken. Before I had met Edward, my purpose in life was taking care of my mom. Then she met Phil, and I moved here so that she could spend more time with him. Although living with Charlie was much easier, I quickly adapted to taking care of him, too. Then I met Edward, and we fell in love. Eventually, I became a part of his family, spending more time at his house than mine. Carlisle and Esme, Edward's parents, treated me as their daughter, and Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie treated me as their sister. I had never had any siblings, and, considering that with both Renee and Charlie the roles of parent and daughter seemed reversed, you could say that I'd never had any parents either. It wasn't hard to believe that this wonderful part of my life would never end. But, somehow, it did. I hadn't even noticed that my new family had become the purpose of my life. Since they were brutally taken from me, I have been abandoned in this never-ending night.

These were—are—my Dark Ages. The times that I couldn't sleep, eat, talk, read, or do pretty much anything (except play the part for Charlie) without thinking of them. Thinking of them would only bring me excruciating pain. I was determined to never let it show, however. I never wanted anyone to know exactly how much pain I was in. I'm a pretty private person. I haven't done a good job though. I've lost a lot of weight, I am visually distraught because I find it unnecessary to make myself look visually appealing anymore, and my nightmares that have me screaming at night made it clear to Charlie that something was wrong. I argued with him, and he didn't make me go to Florida to Renee, or get any help on one condition: that I spent time with friends and started acting "normal". I have been, and everything has been going better (for him) until today, when I decided to make a pretty lousy decision in his eyes.

I just wished I hadn't survived. Anger boiled within me as I thought of Jake saving me. I know he was trying to do the right thing, but here I am, still breathing, the exact opposite of what I wanted to be doing right now. I couldn't live in this much pain. I hurt everyone. I hurt Charlie these past few months, Renee (though she was far away, she knew something was seriously wrong), Jacob (I can never be who he wants me to be. I guess I've been using him.), my school friends by closing myself off, and… the Cullens.

I have come to the conclusion that Edward wasn't lying. I was unwanted and unloved, a menace placed on him and his family. I was weak and human. I was convinced that his family felt the same.

I was broken from my reverie by a knock on my bedroom door. I looked up to see Charlie coming in with a blank look on his face. I'll never forget the words he said next.

"Isabella, I'm don't know what to do with you anymore. Your mother is coming to get you and there will be no arguments this time upon whether or not you are going. Her plane will arrive in two hours, and she plans on coming here and taking you away. She will decide what happens to you next. Furthermore, I'd like to say that I never want to see you again. You've inflicted too much pain on me and instead of growing up and moving on you've decided to persist and stay in the same place you were when Edward left months ago. Goodbye." He didn't even glance at me as he left the room and locked himself in his.

I stared blankly at the spot he was in for a few minutes before thinking coherent thoughts. I'd never heard him speak so sophisticatedly before; he'd never been educated! But I quickly shook that thought out of my head before allowing the pain to enter my system.

They left me. Jacob left me. And now Charlie did too. I blacked out.

I woke up to arms shaking me gently. "Bella?" I heard my mom's voice say.

I got up quickly. "Mom!" She glared at me. And then I knew that she was just as mad as Charlie.

She did a quick examination of my malnourished, unkempt body from head to toe. Shaking her head disappointedly, she told me to pack quickly because we were leaving.

I grabbed my duffle bag from underneath my bed and stuffed it with all of my few belongings and followed her to the car without saying goodbye again to Charlie. She didn't speak to me the entire journey to the airport or on the airplane. When we were in the car and near turning away from the direction of Jacksonville, I finally decided to break the silence.

"Mom?" I asked hesitantly. She didn't even give me a glance. I continued anyway. "Mom, are we going home?" She finally looked at me, and then pulled the car over.

"Bella, there's something you should know." I waited. "Bella, I'm pregnant."

What?! After a moment of shocked silence, I gained my composure and said, "That's great, Mom."

She looked down guiltily. "I'm taking you to live someplace… that you can get better." Silence.

"What do you mean, Mom?"

"Bella," she said before starting to drive again. She shook her head before saying. "Bella, I don't want my child to be around a reckless, suicidal—"

"Mom, you can't be serious," I said, eyes wide.

"I am."

"Where are we going?" I asked, eyes growing wide with panic.

She didn't answer and before I knew what was happening we were pulling into a place that I didn't recognize. It occurred to me instantly before we were in the parking lot where we were. An asylum.

"Let me out of the car," I said as calmly as I could. "LET ME OUT OF THE CAR!" I took off my seatbelt and began to violently attempt to open the door.

She parked in front of the building and next thing I knew, strong men were opening the door and pulling me out of the car. "I'm sorry, Bella." was the last thing I heard before Renee abandoned me and drove away.