I'm not dead, promise! This is the first big 'Arc' of the fic, and Arcs are always at least a few episodes/chapters long, so this too some time. I'll put out another chapter in the other two while I'm on break for this before getting started on the second part. Please enjoy, and I'll address all the reviews down at the bottom. As a sidenote, you all made this the most favorited and followed Jojo/Naruto Xover, which is really surprising for me. Thank you all so muck X3.

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Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, Naruto is the property of Masashi Kishimoto, Jojo's is the property of Hirohiko Araki, and both are published by Shueisha.

Demonic red eyes opened wide as their owner sat up in his bed. As he lifted himself from his daytime slumber, he vaguely noticed one of the whores his minions had brought him earlier that morning. The man stared at her coldly as he stretched, duly noting the quarter-sized holes in her neck the still oozed the last remnants of her lifeblood.

He simply hummed to himself as he turned away from his finished meal and looked to the window. As he shivered slightly, he opted to walk over and open the curtains, miming a deep breath as his half-naked form was bathed in the light of the full moon. The light exposed his excessive musculature, his translucent skin that seemed to shimmer with brightness, and his thick blonde hair that went down to his back.

"This feeling…"

(Play: Stardust Crusaders OST [Departure]: Dark Rebirth)

The blonde-haired man clutched his body, as though it were his own loved one.

"This sensation that is running through me...you can sense him, can't you, Jojo?" blood-red eyes stared backwards as the man clutched the back of his shoulder. "His existence...it calls out to you, to which you call back. Your grandson is alive, despite everything I put him through."

The blonde let out a satisfied huff before moving again. With his immaculate sight, his demonic eyes spotted every meticulous detail in the darkness, seeing all as though the night had been the day. The man tilted his head as he moved through the corridor that led to his study, every step taken repelling both the light of the world and the darkness itself.

When he reached his study, the man smirked as he slowly dragged his pointed nails across the fine wooden table within. In a truly seductive manner, his fingers danced across several curiosities and gently moved precious books, before he finally found the object he sought. Slowly, the blonde-haired man pulled a self-developing camera from his desk.

"So you survived after all, Little Jōshirō?" he smirked as purple vines emerged from his arm, dark energy dancing around them.

The man's hand darted towards the camera, making a quick strike on it alongside the vines. Immediately, the device came alive and churned out a slowly developing picture. He grabbed it and waved it around for a few seconds.

"Show yourself to me, Little Joushirou," the blonde stared down as the photo began to show an image. "Perfect, this will be quite helpful."

The image that the vine-like Stand had taken was of a small building with a large chimney that billowed with visible amounts of smoke. From what he could see, there was an assortment of chairs inside the building all laid in front of a long counter. While a few people sat within the building, they were hidden behind the massive lantern and paper banners hanging over the entrance.

"An interesting clue, don't you think, Jojo?" the blonde's mouth twisted into a fang filled smirk as he clutched his body once again. "Your grandson is so close...yet so far away...finding out what this means will be taxing."

His hand moved to the back of his left shoulder, his fingers lightly massaging the scar around his neck, before it smoothly lowered to caress the star-shaped birthmark just below his shoulder blade.

"Don't fret, my dear Jonathan...you'll be reunited with him soon…"

"Alright, time to dig in!"

A small smile tugged at the corners of my lips as Naruto began slurping his first bowl of ramen at supersonic speeds. Beside me, I heard Iruka snorting in amusement at the blonde's eating habits.

"Please try to take it slow today, Naruto. My wallet can only take so much," the scarred chūnin moaned.

"Fahts ba shing! Yu don neeb to pay shish tim-"

"Chew with your mouth closed, please," I chided gently.

Naruto swallowed the stream of noodles before turning to us with a sheepish grin. "Hehe, sorry...right, as I was saying, I'm gonna be paying this time around. I got more than enough money from all the D-rank missions we've been doing."

"Oh, so you're saying we can buy as much as we want?" I asked teasingly.

"Woah, hold up! You can't break my wallet either!"

"Alright, alright! I'm just playin' around…"

"So...you've been doing D-ranks with Team 8, right?" the blonde asked nonchalantly.

"Yeah, just basic stuff. Pulling weeds, find missing pets...help repair roofs damaged by the typhoon last month," I shrugged. "Nothing too big, to be honest. In fact, Hinata usually commits herself more to the babysitting missions. She seems pretty good with kids."

"Yeah, I could imagine…" Naruto's dreamy expression fell as he tried to deflect. "S-So, what about you and Kiba?"

"Oh, we're...getting along better…"

"Doesn't he hate you?"

"Naruto, hate is a strong word…" Iruka cupped a hand to his chin in thought. "But yeah, doesn't he uh...you know?"

"Well…"

Several weeks prior

"Fucking asshole! Graaah!"

The dog-nin attempted to kick my legs out from beneath me with a loud roar. Clawed hands slashed at me as I attempted to jump away.

"Fucking showing me up every damn day, making me look stupid! Being a cheating bastard! You're done!"

"Zoom punch!" I yelled, slamming my fist straight into Kiba's face. "You honestly think I wanted to make you look bad? I never even talked to you until we had our first sparring match! I just wanted to graduate!"

"I'LL BEAT YOUR ASS!" the Inuzuka leapt into the air, his dog companion following him. They both began rotating in midair. "Gatsūga!"

"Screw it!" I cried out, leaping towards them and spinning around in response. As I pointed my leg at the two, I willed the ripple into my lower body. "TORNADO OVERDRIVE!"

Present day

"W-We worked it out eventually…" I said lowly.

"Really? It didn't go too far, did it? Anko-chan would've put a stop to it-"

"Iruka-sensei...she was laughing her ass off and wishing she had a camera," I grumbled. "Seriously, why her?"

"You'd need to be in love to understand, Jojo…" the chūnin said dreamily. "One of these days, you'll meet a nice girl who you'll fall madly in love with."

"Yare Yare, girls are so annoying…"

I heard a snort from Teuchi as he walked over to us. "Don't let Ayame hear you say anything like that, you'll never hear the end of it."

"Yeah, Ayame-nee will bust your balls over it," Naruto chuckled as he continued slurping on his ramen. "Man, your noodles are just the best, Teuchi-jiji. I always feel invigorated whenever I come here, I really feel like leaving a tip."

"Naruto, you don't need to worry about leaving a-"

"Actually, I think I have a good idea as to why your ramen is so good," I said blithely. "But before I say it, would you mind giving me some advice on this?"

"ORA!"

Star Platinum quickly erupted from my being and slammed his fists together, before leaning towards the chef. Unfortunately, I had done this just as Ayame walked out of the kitchen with several supplies and vegetables.

"E-Eeep!"

"Shit! Sorry about that, Ayame-chan," I said gently as my Stand caught the boxes she was carrying. "I just didn't know how to bring this up without being subtle."

"Bring what up? You can't just show off your Stand, can you?" Iruka asked nervously.

From the corner of my eye, I noticed Teuchi laughing quietly. The old man doubled over for a few moments in his silent fit, before standing up and wiping his eyes clear. As he turned to me, a bright smile stretched across his face.

"That...that explains so much. Really, I should have realized it sooner," Teuchi let out a small belly laugh as he shook his head. "I sensed it the first time around, but I just didn't get it. You probably did too, huh?"

"W-What are you going on about Ji-san?!" Naruto asked confusedly.

Ayame let out a short moan and hung her head. "Oh no...he's gonna bring that out…"

"Bring what out?" Iruka asked slowly.

"Pāru Jamu!"

At Teuchi's cry, three small bluish creatures shaped like vegetables emerged from his being, letting out small cries of 'Meshaa' or similar vocalizations. On the counter, I could see our ramen glowing with energy as some more blue onion beings peeked their heads out from behind them. Several of the creatures floated towards Star Platinum with curious expressions.

"A-Ahhh! W-What are those?!" Naruto cried out.

"Tou-san's Stand," Ayame said simply.

"Stand?! Teuchi is...a Stand User?" the blonde turned to me in shock. "Wait, how did you know?!"

"Anko-sensei told me."

"Anko-chan? How did Anko know?" Iruka asked.

"The Hokage told her," I said blithely.

Teuchi let out a small sigh. "I really wish he would have refrained from doing that. I understand it's for your benefit, but still…"

"And you know about Stands?!" Naruto asked Ayame.

"Yeah, I've been living with one my whole life...I think I might get one of my own, but still…"

"Wait...have you been feeding us your Stand?" the scarred chūnin asked.

"Well, in a sense...yes, I suppose," Teuchi held his hands up defensively. "I haven't been doing anything nefarious, I assure you. Pearl Jam can improve the quality of food and infuse it with healing properties."

"Healing properties? What does that mean?!" the blonde cried out.

"He can improve the nutritional quality of food, and it can heal any illnesses or ailments," Ayame said offhandedly. "He's been using it on me ever since I was a baby. Since mom died after I was born, he'd use his Stand to improve my baby formula."

"And what about me?!"

"Well, you'd be all skin and bones if I hadn't stepped in, Stand or no Stand. But Pearl Jam certainly helped you get the right balance," the chef then gently poked the boy in the head. "Not to mention how many times I've saved your life."

"W-What does that mean?"

"Yes, I'd like to know what you're implying as well," Iruka said sternly.

"Do you know how many times you've been poisoned, Naruto?" Teuchi's expression turned grim as the blonde squirmed in place. "I assure you, it's been more times than I can count on both hands. I think Jojo actually caught plenty of attempts himself before they could get to you."

"I have...but I guess I couldn't be there for all of them, huh?" I scratched the back of my head as Naruto stared at us in shock. "I get it, this is just insane to think about-"

"Don't even get me started on you, Joushirou!" the chef rounded on me with a stern gaze. "How do you even have a heart condition at your age?!"

I stared at the man blankly while gently slurping on my noodles. "So, those times when I coughed up all that blood and gunk...that was your Stand then?" I hummed thoughtfully at his slow nod. "Yeah, that'd be my Stand ability. It damages my heart whenever I use it."

Teuchi held his hands up like he wanted to strangle me. "Then stop using it! Why would you keep using it if it damages your heart?!"

"Yeah, I don't really understand either, actually…" Naruto said nervously. "What does Star Platinum even do?"

"My Stand's ability is a big secret...like, 'change the entire elemental nations' big. I don't plan to show it off until the Chūnin Exams."

"I-It can't be that bad, right?" Iruka said nervously. Then he quickly leaned towards me. "You can skip time, right?!"

I felt my heart skip a beat in fear at this. "Eh? What are you talking about?"

He's almost got it. I have to deflect quickly!

"You can see into the future for 10 seconds and skip everything if you don't like what you see, is that it?! Please tell me it's time skipping! I need that 5000 Ryō-"

"Did...did you and Anko take bets on my Stand ability?"

"What?! No, no, no...Kakashi and Hokage-sama got in on it too."

"Oh Kami...look, just leave it be, alright! My strengths and weaknesses are out there for everybody to see," I turned back to my noodles with a short huff. "It's their job to figure them out, not for me to tell them."

"Well, that...takes the fun out of it," Naruto chided nervously.

"It's not supposed to be fun…"

"If you say so," the blonde turned back to Teuchi with an awed gaze. "I still can't believe it though...all these years and I never knew about it."

"It wasn't too much trouble, really-"

"No! You practically saved my life, you and Ayame-chan were the only people who treated me like a person back then," Naruto stood up and bowed to the chef. "Thank you...really, thank you for everything…"

"It wasn't any trouble for me, really…" Teuchi sent the blonde a kind smile. "I just like making good food, that's all."

As Teuchi set new bowls for us, I couldn't help but think about what was happening. Teuchi was a Stand User, with a familiar Stand. How many more cases like that would show up? And how many more Stand Users were going to come out of the woodwork to come after us.

"Is something wrong, Joushirou?" the chef asked.

"...Yeah, you said you sensed me the first time around, right?" a lump formed in my throat at the man's slow nod. "Did you ever hear that old adage about us?"

"Gravity...all Stand Users are drawn to one another, and they're fated to meet," Teuchi hummed thoughtfully. "I wouldn't say that's the case, considering you're only the second one I've met."

"Well, you're the third for me," I said grimly. From the corner of my eye, I noticed Iruka shuffling away from me nervously. A harsh chuckle escaped my mouth as I closed my eyes. "You know what they say about that, right? Two is a coincidence...but three…"

"What, you think more Stand Users are gonna show up?" Naruto asked.

"I don't think it's gonna happen...I know it's gonna happen…"

Training ground 8

"The hell took you so long, Gaki?!"

"Good to see you too, Sensei!" I said sarcastically. "I always enjoy our talks so much, and I feel so safe around you."

"Ha, ha, very funny. Come on, Kurenai wants me to help the mutt first," Anko leaned forward and made a few cursory sniffs. "You were at that ramen joint?"

"Yeah, your boyfriend was there...5000 Ryō? Really?!"

"Oh fuck! He told you about the bet?!"

"He let it slip by accident...and no, I don't skip time," I growled as I followed the woman through the woods.

"Yes! 5000 Ryō, here I come!"

"Yare Yare, you are all so annoying…" I muttered. "So what, Kiba's getting training first today?"

"Yeah, mostly just fixing his Taijutsu. He's good at his clan's style, but he's too set in the whole 'hit-and-run' portion of it, so he's not suited to long fights...huh, no wonder you're always kicking his ass," she craned her neck to look at me, a wry grin spreading across her face. "So how's that wizard style thing coming along?"

"Sendo! And it's fine, I guess. You saw my last fight with Inuzuka, so you know I didn't totally flop or anything."

"Yeah, with the way Hamon works you can keep going for hours," Anko faced forward again as a contemplative look invaded her visage. "So, what do you think about the kunoichi?"

"Your friend is less annoying than you are-"

"Not Kurenai, gaki...Also, hurtful!"

"You still haven't paid me for the last window you broke," I deadpanned.

"That's not true, shut up!" the purple-haired Jōnin waved her hand at me in mock threat. "I was talking about the other one, the Hyūga. Blue hair, shy as hell and can't stop stuttering, always wears that big coat to hide her growing-"

"I think I get the picture," I said in annoyance. "Why are you asking me? It's your friend's job to train her, not mine."

"Eh, Kurenai's been going on and on about how she's struggling with her Clan's style and she can't get serious when in a fight, all that stuff."

"...Too flexible."

"Eh? What did you say?"

"She's too flexible," I clarified. "I haven't seen much of the Jūken, but from what I know the only elemental jutsu used with it for the most part are Raiton and Doton, which means the style is meant to be pretty rigid. That's why it wouldn't work for somebody who's really flexible, and the only person with that problem besides myself is Hinata."

"You're only so flexible because of CCPD."

"Doesn't change a thing. Sendo requires a lot of flexibility...huh," I leaned my hand against my cheek in contemplation. "Wonder if I could teach other people Hamon."

"How would you get them to do it? It's a Clan thing, right?"

"There could be a technique to pass it on, you don't know there isn't!"

I did know there was one, and I planned to give it to either Naruto or Sasuke. On one hand, Sasuke was always curious about it, and it might prevent Orochimaru's influence the same way it could remove Vampire and Zombie essence when it got into the body. On the other hand, Sasuke probably wouldn't appreciate being punched in the gut...Naruto it was.

Eventually, we found ourselves in a clearing with several scattered logs dotting one side. A few familiar people sat on them, though I spotted a prone form on the ground, a little white dog sitting next to them.

"Alright, we're here. Hey, Kurenai!"

Tired red eyes glanced at my Jōnin sensei as the dark-haired woman sat up. Across from her, I could see Kiba lying on the ground, a bump already formed on his head. I walked up to him just as Anko ran to her 'bestie'.

"What happened to the mutt?"

"He got impatient and yelled at somebody to fight him," Kurenai turned to my direction, looking at her most brash genin. "I decided to oblige."

I ignored the two and held a hand out to the dog-nin. Kiba opened his eyes and squinted at my hand before taking it, ignoring my concerned look. "How do you feel?" I felt my shoulders slump slightly as he turned away from me. "You know, you could answer me at least?"

"My head hurts. That's all you need to know."

I shrugged as he walked off. It was a start, at least.

"Oi, mutt! Where do you think you're going?!"

"I think I'm sitting down?" Kiba told my sensei confusedly.

"Oh, that's cute. Training hasn't started yet, Mutt!"

"I just got my ass beat 15 minutes ago! You expect me to try again now?!"

The sadistic grin that stretched across her face was telling enough. "I do, and Kurenai does too. You're gonna need all the help you can get," she walked up to the boy and roughly poked him in the forehead. "Kurenai and I are trying to help you, and you're acting like a gaki over it. If you're so sick of being shown up by others, why aren't you doing something about it?!"

"You're a real bitch, y'know that?!"

"Finally, somebody agrees with me!" I cried out.

"You shut it!" my Jōnin sensei pointed at me and motioned towards the other two members of Team 8. "Go sit with them! I'll make a Shadow Clone after Kurenai and I get started with the mutt."

"Yare Yare, whatever…" I walked over to the log Shino and Hinata sat on and took my place between them.

I noticed the bug-nin glancing at me from behind his sunglasses as I approached. "At least you two are tolerating each other."

"I guess…"

From the corner of my eye, I noticed Akamaru trotting over. The little ninken jumped onto the log and plopped his head on Hinata's lap, much to the girl's chagrin. "Akamaru-chan? Why aren't you with Kiba," the Hyūga furrowed her brows slightly at the dog's huff. "He might need your help, you know that?"

"Arf!"

"This isn't the time to take a nap, we're supposed to get a big mission later…"

"Arf!"

I snorted quietly at the dog's responses and tilted my head towards the girl nonchalantly. "So, how was your last date with Naruto?"

*CRACK*

OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK!

"Hrrk…that's my...shoulder…" I growled, a pulse of foreign chakra lancing into my shoulder in response.

"H-Hinata, using the Jūken like that...it's aggravating my hive-Urrk!" Shino whimpered as the girl increased the pressure on his own shoulder.

When I craned my neck to try and reason with the girl, I found active Byakugan staring back at me, the raised veins making her cold gaze far more terrifying. She leaned forward with an expressionless face as more chakra seared into my shoulder.

"...How?" ゴ ゴ ゴ ゴ ゴ

"W-What are you talking about?" I wheezed.

"How did you know about that?" she growled lowly.

"Who do you think got you set up with him?!" I choked out quietly.

"I...figured it out after that rock nearly crushed us…" Shino croaked beside me.

Hinata regarded the bug-user for a few seconds before releasing us from her hold. I let out a sharp, hissing breath as I willed my shoulder to heal with Hamon, all while sending her an annoyed glare. Shino craned his neck to gape at the girl in shock.

She stared blankly at us for a few seconds, then went ghost pale. "Oh Kami! I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it! I was...I just got scared!" the Hyūga bowed her head low as she clasped her hands. "P-Please forgive me!"

"...You got scared, so you nearly damaged our shoulders permanently?" I asked sardonically.

"It's not like that!" She hissed. "Listen, you cannot tell anybody that I'm dating him! Do you understand?!"

"Oi, what's going on over there?!"

"Nothing, Anko-sensei!" the girl said cheerfully before I could raise my voice. "Just Akamaru nearly peeing on us, nothing to worry about!"

"Arf?!"

"Ah, sure whatever. Kurenai and I will get the Shadow Clones ready in a bit, just hang tight," my Jōnin sensei went back to helping Kurenai with Kiba, completely oblivious to my new plight.

"Okay, wanna explain-"

"Give me a second," the bluenette formed her hands into a set of seals and molded a scarce amount of chakra around the tips of her fingers. "Magen: Kokoni Arazu no Jutsu!"

From the corner of my eye, I noticed Kurenai twitch slightly, but aside from that everything seemed normal. But it didn't take a genius to figure out a genjutsu was in place, and I didn't need to ask the girl why she casted it...well, technically I did.

"Ok, now can you explain why you damaged our shoulders?"

"I just have to be careful, alright," the girl twiddled her fingers nervously. "If my father finds out I'm dating Naruto, I'm done for."

"I'm sure your dad isn't that psychotic," I deadpanned.

"It's not him specifically, it's my Clan…" Hinata rubbed her temples tiredly as she inched away from us. "The only reason I haven't gotten the Caged Bird Seal yet is because I'm supposed to be married off to another Clan Heir to improve relationships between them, or some foppish noble in the Daimyō's court. If they find out I'm dating Naruto, the Clan elders will probably use it as a reason to put me in the branch family."

"I...I doubt that's actually how it works…"

"That may be because you don't have experience with inter-clan politics," Shino said flatly.

I stared at the bug-nin from the corner of my eye. "Gee, it's not like my Clan is...dead, or anything."

"My apologies, I know that's a sore spot for you, as well as Sasuke," the Aburame cupped a hand to his chin in thought. "Naruto is the village outcast, and he's generally reviled by everyone for what seems to be no apparent reason. I think you can understand how it would look if it were found he was secretly dating a Clan Heiress."

"...What exactly would happen to him?"

"In his own words?" Hinata clasped her hands and turned away. "He said he would probably 'be beaten up in an alleyway and left to bleed to death'. He got really descriptive about it too."

"That's not...that wouldn't...Naruto isn't a bad guy, he's never hurt anybody in his life," I rebutted.

"That may be the case, but we've all seen how people look at him," Shino cocked his head to the side, and I swore I saw his fist clench for a split second. "I've heard things too. I've heard plenty of villagers saying what they would like to do to him. Even if it were illegal, they could easily find a way to escape any repercussions."

"He's the de facto heir to the Uzumaki Clan, there shouldn't be a problem."

"Joushirou, you know why there would be a problem," Hinata said lowly.

I winced slightly at the implications. "What, that? I can't believe that's an issue with the Hyūga Clan. You're all supposed to be intelligent people, right?"

"We're smart, not rational," the bluenette deadpanned.

"Fair enough…" I grumbled under my breath as I leaned back while holding my arms behind my head. "He's not acting stupid around you, is he? I mean, in the bad way?"

"You know that's not like him," Hinata said blithely. "He's really sweet, we go on picnics deep in the woods and he's the one who always cooks."

"Huh...I didn't know he did that…"

"...He makes really good cinnamon buns."

"What was that?"

"N-Nothing!" the girl quickly waved her hands in front of herself to deflect. "It was just...wait, before, you said you were the one to set us up…what does that mean?"

"...So, full disclosure...once I saw you had a crush on him, I did everything I could to try and get you two together. I even tried to manipulate a bunch of events so that he would somehow hear you had a crush on him, or he'd accidentally say you were cute in front of you."

"E-EEP!" poor Hinata turned bright red at this. "That's just...all of those times where we bumped right into each other without knowing until after the fact?"

"Genjutsu."

"That time where he fell on top of me from a tree?"

"Hamon. If I use it the right way, I can manipulate a person's movements for just a bit. We were both sitting in the tree at the time, so I did it without him knowing."

"That's...genius," Shino whispered. "You've been trying to set them up in secret, for that long?"

"Yeah, the problem was that Naruto was so dense, it was a chore…"

"Wait! What about that time where Naruto-kun and I were stuck on those stairs for a whole day?!" the girl cried out.

"Uh...you see..."

Flashback to before chapter 6

"Alright...I know this is like a trick DI-that undead bastard did…" I grumbled under my breath. "But it should work…"

I peeked my head around the corner, smirking at what I saw. Both Naruto and Hinata were taking the stairs, the blonde going down, and the bluenette going up. The Hyūga froze upon seeing him as a dark red blush spread across her face, and she struggled to even walk past him.

"Alright...now or never," I whispered, willing Star Platinum to emerge.

*VRRRRRRRRRMMMMM*

"GAHAAAAGH!"

"EEP!"

Naruto flailed around as the girl fell face first onto him. Hinata's blush darkened as she nearly fainted from falling on top of her crush. After a few minutes, the two righted themselves, with the blonde helping the girl off of him.

"Ah, hey sorry about that Hinata-chan. Man, that's kinda like a couple of weeks ago...ah, sorry about that too," Naruto rubbed the back of his head nervously. "I didn't mean to fall on you like that, I promise."

"I-It's fine, Naruto-kun. I'm sorry for falling for you-on you!" the girl quickly corrected herself. "Falling on you as well."

"Don't worry about it. I'll see you later-"

*VRRRRRRRRRMMMMM*

"AAAAGHHH!"

"EEP!"

I peeked my head from the corner again just as they fell on top of one another a second time. "Just according to Keikaku…"

Present

"I used a strong genjutsu," I said finally.

"A genjutsu? How?! It actually felt like we were falling on each other!"

"...It was a really strong genjutsu," I said nonchalantly.

Shino cleared his throat, interrupting the girl before she could question me further. "Anko is coming, drop the genjutsu."

"EEP!"

Hinata formed her hands into a set of seals and dispelled the illusion just as my Jōnin sensei walked over. A vein nearly popped in my forehead when she cocked her head to the side to stare at us suspiciously.

"So, what's with the genjutsu?"

"I-I was p-practicing," the bluenette stuttered out.

"Practicing? Could have picked better people for it," Anko turned to Shino and I for a split second. "You've got bug-boy here with his constantly shifting chakra patterns, and you got the gaki with his weird sun powers that fixes his body no matter what."

"I...ano, that's fair, I guess…"

I sneered at the purple-haired woman as she turned to me. "Let me guess, you're a shadow clone?"

"Yeah, Kurenai should have one of hers up in a bit. She and the real me are busy dealing with the mutt...speaking of which," the clone poked Akamaru in the forehead. "Oi, dog! Go to your partner, you need training too."

Akamaru whimpered loudly for several seconds, before quickly being cowed by the clone's vicious glare. The ninken quickly jumped from the log and trotted over to Kiba as the dog-nin took the short break our senseis had given him.

...Knowing all of the things that could happen to that dog in this world...I was gonna protecc him with my life.

"Alright, now that that's done with," Anko's clone turned to us with a lopsided grin. "What has Kurenai taught you about nature transformations?"

"N-Not much," Hinata admitted. "I...I was given some Raiton and Doton jutsu by my father, and I'm supposed to master them to impress my Clan."

"And how's that working out for ya?"

The bluenette hung her head and tried to inch away from the woman. "It's n-not working out very well…"

"Alright then, and what about you bug-boy?"

"My name is Shino-"

"Just answer the question," the clone said tiredly.

"...I am able to use Doton and Katon style jutsu, as they are my natural affinities. I wish to refrain from the latter, however," Shino held up a hand as some of his Kikaichū scuttled onto his fingers. "I think my reasoning should be obvious."

"Alright, if that's settled...wait," Anko's clone pulled out a piece of chakra paper and handed it to Hinata. "Use that, it should help us give you an idea of what jutsu you can reliably use."

"Ano...how do I use it?"

The clone facepalmed at the girl's confusion. "Just push chakra into the paper, and it'll react according to your chakra affinity."

I pulled out a small piece of chakra paper from my pocket and held it out. "Here, you can use me as an example. If you have fire affinity, it'll burn up and turn to ash, or get cut into pieces if you have wind affinity," I pushed the slightest hint of chakra into the paper, and it immediately became damp enough that it could be pulled apart with the slightest tug. "Since I have water affinity, it gets damp like this, which means I'm better at Suiton jutsu."

Hinata's eyes widened in realization, and a smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "Oh, I think I can do that...let me see…" the bluenette's smile faded when she saw the results. The moment the paper turned damp, her stuttering began anew. "T-This is just a m-mistake, right? Can I p-please try again?"

"What do you mean? I only brought one piece of paper with me," Anko's clone tapped the girl playfully on the shoulder. "So you're a Suiton user, huh? That's pretty neat!"

The Hyūga heiress stared at the paper impassively. "Hyūga aren't water users…"

"They're not? Well, sucks to be them," the clone lightly slapped the girl's shoulder before pulling away and turning to face Shino and I. "Alright, bug-boy, what do you have to train for?"

"Aside from improving the effectiveness of my Kikaichū, which I am always doing...not very much," the bug-nin cupped a hand to his chin in thought. "I suppose I could train with Doton and Shurikenjutsu."

"Alright, try that! Jojo, make some clones and train with your wizard fighting style-"

"It's not magic!" I growled.

"Whatever! Just make some clones and have them train it. I need your help teaching the Hyūga water jutsu-"

"I don't need water jutsu," Hinata quickly interjected.

Anko's clone gave the girl a wild grin. "You're learning water jutsu, no if, ands, or buts! You got that?"

The bluenette visibly drooped at this. "Y-Yes Anko-sensei…"

"Good! Alright gaki, get your clones ready!"

"Yare Yare, whatever you crazy bitch," I growled under my breath.

"What was that you just said? Mind repeating it for us?"

"Fuck off, you know exactly what I said," I grumbled as I turned away. I quickly formed my hands into the set of seals and molded a substantial amount of chakra around my hands. ""Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

There was a tiny sensation of lightheadedness as I created two clones for training. A short breath kept me upright as the Ripple energized my body, though I still felt the drain on my chakra reserves afterwards. Shino quietly walked over to a nearby tree and began training with Shurikenjutsu, all while his insects surveyed the area around us.

From the corner of my eyes, I noticed my clones walking away from us. Once they were a safe distance away, they began training with the Sendo katas Anko had helped me fish out of my basement. While the clones couldn't produce more than a miniscule amount of Hamon, they produced just the right amount Sendo training required, which would get me started on properly using the Ripple in an actual fight.

"Alright, so you're probably wondering how Suiton works, right?" Anko's eyebrow rose at the girl's slow nod. "Well, it's actually pretty useful for all sorts of things. I know-ugh the real me only knows a few…" the purple-haired woman pinched the bridge of her nose. "Ok, that's gonna get confusing real fast-"

"Water jutsu has a bunch of applications," I interjected boredly. "It's useful for battering an opponent with great force, or you can use certain water jutsu for slicing attacks. You can also use it defensively, such as making a wall of water, or you can even use it as a snare or prison with certain techniques."

"Wait, hold up! Oi, gaki, I'm the teacher here," Anko's clone growled.

"You were busy contemplating the meaning of your existence as a clone, and I was getting bored," I said tiredly.

"Ano, h-how do I make water then?"

"You knead chakra, usually in your stomach, and expel it from your mouth," the clone chuckled at the girl's near facevault. "Yeah, that part is only for people with a lot of experience. Even I have trouble with some of those...luckily there's a trick for it," my sensei's clone turned to me. "Oi, gaki, show her the jutsu."

"Sure, whatever," my hands went into the dragon and tiger seals as I molded a small amount of chakra around my fingers. "Suiton: Inryokuken!"

The air around me turned dry as droplets of water formed around me, before coalescing into a large orb in front of me. I furrowed my brows slightly and shifted my chakra just a bit, willing a second orb to form next to the first, then a third, and so on, until I had five orbs of water in front of me. From the corner of my eye, I noticed Hinata's lavender colored Byakugan widening in awe at the sight of the growing blue spheres.

"So, that's f-for what? Do you use the orbs as weapons or…"

"The gravitational pull is meant to pull water towards you so you can use it in a jutsu," Anko clarified. "It's not meant as a weapon, just as a training instrument or a way to set up water jutsu."

I refrained from telling either of them that I was working on a way to weaponize it.

"Oi, gaki! Show her a water jutsu you've been working on."

"Yare Yare, just give me a minute," my eyes darted to one of the water orbs on the left, and with a shift in my chakra, I willed it to float several feet away from us. Once I was sure it was at safe spot, I formed my hands into the ram and tiger seals. "Suiton: Mizuame Nabara!"

The water orb I had decided to sacrifice immediately exploded. As the water hit the ground and spread out, it slowly transformed into a more viscous liquid, until soon it was the same consistency as really thick treacle or honey. As the bluenette and my sensei's clone stared at the results, I cupped a hand to my chin in contemplation.

"Hmm...maybe I should try to make it less...explodey?"

"Wait a minute! How the hell did you learn Izumo's jutsu?" Anko cried out.

"...Spied on him, memorized the seals, reverse engineered it," I shrugged. "Wasn't that hard to do, just had to make sure he couldn't find me even if he did know I was there."

"You can't just steal jutsu, Joushirou!"

"Oh, oh! So, an entire Clan gets to do it, and nobody bats an eye, but one genin does it and suddenly you're going nuts?"

"It's different for the Uchiha Clan...also, Kakashi has one of those too, so-"

"Just because some people have strange eyes, doesn't mean they get special perks…" I glanced at the Hyūga heiress from the corner of my eye. "No offense, obviously."

"Right, n-none taken…" Hinata held her hands up shakily. "So, how do I do it? Dragon and tiger seals, and then what?"

"Make sure your chakra flows...like, really flows. Like water would," Anko blinked at the girl's deadpan look. "What?! That's how it's supposed to work, don't look at me like that!"

The bluenette furrowed her brows as she formed the hand seals for the jutsu. "Suiton: Inryokuken!" her lavender eyes widened as water droplets formed around her and drifted towards a spot in the air directly in front of her hands. She furrowed her brows slightly when she noticed the growing water orb ripple slightly. "It's...difficult to keep up…"

"Eh, you'll get better with training and increasing your reserves. You already look like a natural," Anko turned to me with a lopsided grin. "Oi, gaki! Show her an actual weaponized jutsu, why don't ya?"

"Alright, fine then," I turned to the clone with a cold glare. "Suiton: Kōshi-"

"No! Do not use the mouth shot thing on me!" Anko growled. "Show her...agh, show her the water wave thing. I'm still supposed to train you guys."

"Yare Yare, fine…" I willed one of my water orbs forward and went through the set of hand seals I had become more than familiar with. "Suiton: Mizurappa!"

The orb expanded slightly before transforming into a small wave of water that shot forward in midair. I felt my shoulders slumping and a bead of sweat dripping down the side of my head as the wave crashed into a few trees. The wood cracked and splintered as they all snapped in half, falling to the ground with loud thumps.

...I guess Naruto might have some work then.

"Alright, now you try it," Anko told the Hyūga, quickly demonstrating the hand seals for the girl. "Remember: Tatsu, Tora, U, and make sure your chakra is flowing smoothly."

"H-Hai, Anko-sensei!" Hinata made the hand seals and gingerly molded chakra around her fingers. "Suiton: Mizurappa!"

I don't know why exactly her cupping her hands together changed it, since she only did it to better control the jutsu. What it actually did was transform what should have been a wave into a massive jet of water that blasted through several trees and rocks. While the girl dialed down the strength of the water, she didn't do well trying to reign in its intensity.

"AAAAGHHHH!"

"ARF! ARF!"

"Ugh! We're wet!"

Anko's clone made a small popping noise as the jutsu died down. "Wooh, looks like you used 'Water Trumpet' instead of 'Water Wave' by accident," the purple-haired woman looked at the shocked girl with a wicked sneer. "Welp, looks like you guys are on your own."

*POOF*

"What the-Why did she just dispel?" I flinched as I heard Kurenai calling out to us.

We were quickly greeted by two very wet Jōnin and a wet inuzuka with his ninken, all four of them glaring at us. When I noticed Hinata backing away nervously, I glanced to my sensei with the hopes that she would back us up with her clone's memories. Anko simply responded by giving me a twisted grin.

"Kami, can't you aim your water jutsu better, Gaki?" the purple-haired Jōnin stormed up to me and poked me roughly in the forehead. "You're hopeless, y'know that?!"

"You bitch!" I growled under my breath.

"Well, looks like we'll have to change then," Kurenai pinned me with a harsh stare from her blood-red eyes. "Unfortunately for you, you don't get to watch like you probably planned."

"Please stop trying to make me barf…" I grumbled.

"Oh, so you're saying we're not good enough for you, is that it gaki?" my sensei growled.

"Hey, don't you still owe me money for some of my windows?" I asked coldly.

"Now is not the time for that!"

Hokage's Office, waiting room

"S-So, what does a C-Rank mission normally look like?" Hinata asked nervously.

Anko glanced at us with narrowed eyes, an unsure expression settling across her face. "At worst, it'd just be some bandits hassling us on the roads. Dealing with enemy shinobi shouldn't come up."

"And if it does?" I asked lowly.

"Then it's not a C-Rank then," my sensei said simply. "If things get heated like that, we're out immediately."

"She's not wrong," Kurenai leaned forward in her seat with a concerned look. "I will pull all of us out of there if we encounter enemy shinobi. While you certainly haven't endeared me to your presence, I don't plan on risking your life."

I hummed thoughtfully at this. "Thank you for that, Kurenai-sensei..."

The dark-haired Jōnin cocked an eyebrow up at this. "I can tell you're genuinely appreciative of that...but...it just sounds so…"

"That is just how Joushirou works, Kurenai-sensei," Shino interjected. "He's not very open with his emotions towards other people unless he's truly comfortable around them."

"I see…"

"I just realized something," Kiba exclaimed loudly. "If we really wanna ward off bandits, we should keep Joushuya up front."

"Beg your pardon?" I asked darkly.

"Y'know, because of your resting bitch face," the dog-nin mimed a poking motion towards my head. "For people that don't know you, or aren't girls, they'd be scared shitless just by looking at your face."

"Yare Yare, what are you now, a comedian?"

"I figured it'd be a good backup career...I'm better at being a ninja, obviously."

"That says a lot about your skills, doesn't it?" Anko teased.

"Che, whatever…"

The door to the Hokage's office opened, and Team 7 stepped out. While his face was hidden behind a mask, Kakashi was visibly eye-smiling as he herded this three genin into the hall. In front of him, Sakura shambled forward tiredly, while both Naruto and Sasuke stared forward blankly, tick marks visible on their foreheads.

"So, what are your missions for today?" Anko asked sardonically.

Sasuke glared at my Jōnin sensei. "That information is classified-"

"Just a few D-Rank missions," Kakashi interrupted quickly. "Nothing too big, just picking up some trash from the storm, weeding gardens, the like. I'm sure my cute little genin can handle it."

Note to self, Kakashi needs to be watched.

"We're ninja, and we're stuck doing chores…" the Uchiha grunted angrily.

"Just be patient," I said curtly. "You'll get a big mission eventually, don't just charge into his office demanding it."

"Sure, whatever...wait, what are you guys here for?"

"We were told we would be getting a C-Rank mission. Jojo and his Sensei are accompanying us," Shino informed them.

"Agh! Are you serious?!" the blonde pulled at his hair angrily and stamped a foot down. "You guys are getting some cool assignment while we're stuck doing chores and babysitting? This isn't fair!"

"Naruto, C-Rank missions are only for ninja who can handle themselves. You only just began training with your one 'trait'," Kakashi hummed thoughtfully as Naruto sagged at his remark. "The three of you need time before you can get more dangerous assignments. Do you understand this?"

The young members of Team 7 let out a grunt or huff each, then bowed their heads. "H-Hai, Kakashi-sensei!"

"Wonderful! Well, those roofs won't repair themselves, will they?" the silver-haired Jōnin began herding his genin towards their next destination. For a split second, he turned to us with an eye-smile and a wave. "Good luck on your C-Rank!"

As Team 7 left, a chūnin emerged from the office and waved us in. Once I stepped into the room, I could feel the ounce of tension in the air. The ninja at the mission assignment weren't grinning smugly at the thought of assigning us new chores, and the Hokage wasn't lazily smoking his pipe as he faced us, instead sporting a dark expression. It was like I had just stepped into another universe all of the sudden.

"...So, is it true then?" Kurenai asked nervously.

"It is," Hiruzen said grimly as he closed his eyes. "To be honest, I didn't feel right designating it a C-Rank mission, all things considered, but I was assured he wouldn't be a threat."

"Wouldn't be a threat?!" Anko cried out. "But, that guy r-"

"Anko! Not around them!" the dark-haired Jōnin hissed while glancing at the four of us.

Shino stepped forward nervously, standing up straight as he addressed the old man. "If I may ask...what exactly is our mission?"

"Prisoner extradition and bounty collection," Iruka said flatly. "We found a wanted criminal, Iwagakure wants him back, we need money. It's pretty standard...a-aside from the fact that the criminal is also a disgraced chūnin."

I glared at the ninja at the desk. "We're going into the wilderness, to meet one of the hidden villages that sees us in the most unfavorable way...while bringing a former ninja with us, one who could probably easily kill us?"

"That is why I wasn't too keen on giving it the C-Rank designation," the Hokage said sheepishly. "You can relax, Joushirou. His ability to use chakra has been sealed away as best as possible, and he's in special bindings that also hold seals, ones that can prevent an escape and be used to track him if he does."

"I don't know how I feel about this…"

"I promise you, there won't be any chance of you or Team 8 being harmed," Hiruzen cocked his head to the side as he inspected my reaction. "I don't think you'd need to worry about his escape. Just hand the prisoner over to the Iwa nin, collect the bounty, and be on your way."

"Ano, w-what if they refuse to pay?" Hinata asked slowly.

"Then keep the prisoner until they do," the old man said simply. "Nobody wants another Shinobi War, so Iwa knows they're not in a position to cause an incident."

Behind me, I heard Kiba letting out a low growl in annoyance. I ignored the dog-nin and watched as the old man pulled out a large folder and handed it to Kurenai. My Jōnin sensei leaned over the dark-haired woman's shoulder and scrutinized the contents of the files.

"You're really sure about this?" the purple-haired woman asked.

"I am. This mission is important, and it's quite dangerous, but after every assessment and taking into account every possible variable, I can't fathom any danger to you or your genin."

"I'm still not sure about this…" Anko said nervously.

"Anko, I've known you and these kids for years. I'm sure you can handle this," Iruka said reassuringly.

"...Alright, fine!" she said hotly. "But if something goes wrong, we're outta there in a heartbeat."

"I wouldn't expect you to stay if something did go wrong," the Hokage said grimly. He held a hand up and snapped his fingers towards the corner. "Bring him in please."

The ANBU agent hiding there revealed himself for a few seconds and nodded at his superior, then blinked out of existence. A few minutes later, he returned alongside a second ANBU, both holding a man in rags and chains. The prisoner lifted his head, revealing a young man with dark brown eyes, a fair-skinned face, and black hair.

"Murasaki Eiki, you have committed crimes against your people and escaped justice for what you have done," Hiruzen motioned towards us with a cold expression. "These Shinobi will be escorting you to Kannabi Town, where you'll be handed over to Iwa Shinobi."

The now named Eiki craned his neck to look at us, a confused expression spreading across his face. He turned away and faced the floor while mumbling to himself, the few words I could make out being about our genin status.

The Hokage leaned towards the man with a disgusted glare. "I don't want you to be mistaken about anything, Murasaki. The only reason you're still alive is because you have a bounty on your head that stipulates it, nothing more," he clutched the sides of the desk angrily. "If I had it my way, you wouldn't be here right now. I want you out of my village, and my country, as soon as possible."

Murasaki hung his head and mumbled something I couldn't quite catch. Hiruzen motioned for the ANBU to take him away as the other ninja at the assignment desk murmured amongst themselves. He then turned to our Jōnin senseis, a tired expression spreading across his face.

"He'll be handed over to you when you reach the village gates. Make sure you're prepared for the journey, as it could take a few days."

"To Kannabi Town, right?" Anko narrowed her eyes at the prisoner as the ANBU agents removed him from the room. "Hmph...as long as we have the right supplies, we should be good."

Konoha front gate

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T BRING MY DANGO STASH?!"

I tilted my head as I pushed a finger in my ear to clear it. "You heard what I said. We can only bring the essentials."

"Dango is essential! You maniac, you can't do this!"

"Anko, you really need to lay off the stuff," Kurenai chided. "If you eat too much, you'll get fat-"

"Don't patronise me, Yūhi!" Anko's animalistic growl cut through the air, silencing everyone around us as they shuddered in terror. "If I don't get my Dango, somebody is getting their ass kicked!"

Kiba went pale and immediately hid behind me as the purple-haired woman ranted and raved.

"Oi, stop shouting! You're making small children cry," I said curtly.

"I will strangle you dead!"

"Ahem!"

The five of us turned to see the two random ANBU from before, along with several others, holding the chained prisoner. At the back, I noticed the familiar eagle-masked agent chuckling to herself. Murasaki stared at us owlishly from his spot on the ground, most likely wondering why we were the ones to escort him back to his country's ninja.

"Oh, they brought the prisoner to us...you guys wouldn't happen to have any Dango with you, would you?"

The lead ANBU sighed tiredly at my Jōnin sensei's antics. "No, we didn't bring any Dango. Please just take the prisoner and get going."

"Nooooooo! This isn't fair!" Anko fell to her knees and pounded the ground angrily. "You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!"

Kurenai sweatdropped as her friend cried, then turned to me. "Is she gonna be like this the whole trip?"

"Probably...there was this one time where the store she liked went out of Dango for a day and she went completely nuts," I leaned over to the dark-haired woman and smirked as my voice became the most quiet whisper. "I could probably make her some...but I think I'll hold off on it until she pays for the last few windows."

"That's really petty of you...how many times has she done it?"

"37 times," I said, an eye twitching as I remembered every window break my sensei had been responsible for. "About 12 of those times were the same window...each."

"Really? I keep telling her that she should cut that out…" Kurenai palmed the side of her head in bewilderment. "I really hope she behaves on this one."

"E-Excuse me!"

I turned to see the prisoner addressing the ANBU holding him down. Eiki shuddered as one of the leaders glared at him, but stood up straighter regardless.

"Could I m-maybe get another group...one that's more...sane?"

Almost all of the ANBU agents broke out in loud, raucous laughter, save for one who stood at the back watching me creepily. I was assuming he was a ROOT agent...in which case I was going to have to watch my back whenever I was in the village.

The lead agent let out the last of his giggles before leaning down to the man. "They're the ones the Hokage chose to escort you. Be lucky you got the most tame group we could find."

"Tamest...oh, why?" Murasaki planted his face into the ground and began moaning. "Why?! Why me?!"

"That's your issue. Now then," the ANBU turned to our Jōnin sensei and handed them the chains that bound the man. "Please get this garbage out of our village."

"So...what are you doing?"

The six of us walked down the path to Kannabi Town, and it was only an hour after we had left Konoha. Anko and Kurenai kept pace far in front of us, making sure that Murasaki had as much distance from us as they could get.

Which led to situations like, for instance; Kiba, asking me why I was holding a glass of water.

"I'm working on a Hamon technique," I held that glass up and shook it gently, causing the liquid inside to ripple a bit. "The essence of it is that Hamon will pass through this water, then through me, and into the surrounding area. That'll let me sense everything around me, even if there's somebody hiding behind a wall or something."

"You sure it isn't magic?" Anko called back to us.

"It can mean 'Way of the Hermit' too, you know!"

"Yeah, but hermits don't really make water projectiles or extend their arms out," my Jōnin sensei snorted at my glare. "So yeah, magic seems like a better description."

"It seems like water is involved in quite a bit of Hamon techniques," Shino noted. "At least, many of the ones I remember you being capable of."

"Liquid in general just conducts Hamon really well. I could probably use some Sake for the technique instead, like one of the other ones I use," I held the glass of water to my face and furrowed my brows. "Doesn't look like I've gotten the hang of it yet."

"Kami! You know you don't have to constantly talk about training, right?" Anko craned her neck to stare at me and the other three genin. "Why don't you talk about normal things? Talk about tits why don't you?"

"Anko!" Kurenai shouted

"What? They're 12-year-olds-"

"I'm 13," I said flatly.

"See? He's got even more reason to want to talk about that kind of stuff."

"Yare Yare Daze…" I grumbled, palming the side of my head lightly in exasperation. "Crazy bitch, trying to turn us into perverts."

"Oi! I ain't no pervert…" a cheshire grin stretched across the woman's face. "I'm a super pervert! There's a big difference."

I glared at my Jōnin sensei in silence for several seconds before letting out a tired sigh. "Just my fucking luck…"

"Do we start talking about tits now?" Kiba whispered to me nervously. "Because I really don't wanna piss her off. She's scarier than my mom."

"Relax, she's not that bad. Once you get used to her it's just annoying to deal with her bullshit."

"Is that about my mom?" the dog-nin hissed.

"No, my sensei," I motioned to the woman in question as she made a lewd joke that only her friend heard. My shoulders slumped slightly as Kurenai blushed at Anko's comments. "Crazy bitch tried to get me killed during my genin test, and she's been like a drill sergeant ever since."

"Damn, sounds like it sucks...so...seen any good pairs of tits lately?"

"Eeep!"

"Sonuda-Damn it, really?!"

"Come on! It's like the only thing guys can connect over!" the dog-nin cried out.

"Choose something else! I don't need to hear you yapping about boobs, I get enough of it from Naruto."

"Is that so?" Hinata asked lowly.

"What, don't be such a wet blanket Joushuya," the Inuzuka snorted. "Our senseis want us to be all 'buddy buddy', right? What kind of girls are you into?"

"Girls who aren't annoying…"

"Ok, a bit generalistic, but okay then," Kiba titled his head over to Shino. "Oi, Shino! What kind of girls do you like?"

"...well, this may take some explanation-"

"We've got plenty of time, man."

"Alright, so it's like this…"

"So, pretty normal conversation pieces there, huh?" Anko tilted her head, noticing the restrained expression on her friend's face. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing...it seems like they're making her uncomfortable, that's all."

"Ah, your kunoichi...Yeah, guy talk can be weird. Never got used to it myself," the purple-haired Jōnin craned her head to look at the girl. "Unless she's interested in one of em."

"You know she only has her heart set on one person, remember? I told you about how I could barely get it out of her."

"Ah yes, the fox-boy…"

"Anko!" Kurenai motioned to the prisoner they were holding in chains.

"What? It's not like this creep is gonna tell anybody," Anko tapped the man with her foot harshly before turning back to her friend. "You said she's always blushing around fox-boy, right? Maybe she can see-"

"Anko!"

"What, relax!"

"They're kids…" Kurenai groaned.

"They're technically legal adults. Old enough to kill, old enough to...well, Joushirou drinks Sake sometimes for one of his techniques, but he mostly uses water."

"We're not at war with anybody though. I don't think they should have to think about that," the dark-haired woman scratched the side of her head nervously. "It's not like they should just rush into that sort of thing."

"Eh, I'm sure there's gonna be another one…" the purple-haired woman's expression turned dark. "And I think I have an idea on whose gonna start it."

"You mean your old teacher?" Kurenai hummed in thought. When she caught her friend looking behind her, she followed her gaze to Anko's lone genin. "What does he have anything to do with Orochimaru?"

"Remember his parents? Orochimaru is the one who…" Anko drew a finger across her throat. "He probably wanted to study a Hamon User, since he wants to know 'every' jutsu in existence."

"Doesn't exactly make sense when you think about it," the dark-haired woman shrugged at her friend's confused expression. "Joushirou's always said that he produces the stuff when he breathes. Orochimaru would need a living subject if he wanted to study it."

"It?"

"You know what I mean!"

"Not exactly...he'd probably refer to both Hamon and the subject 'it', so…"

"Okay, fair enough."

"...Are we taking the right route to Kannabi Town?"

"Hold on, what?!"

Anko rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. "It's just...I realized...I've never actually been to Kannabi Town, or near it."

"Are you saying we're lost?!"

"And that is why I personally prefer smaller breasts."

"I can not believe we're having this conversation…" I deadpanned, giving Shino a glare from the corner of my eye.

"EEP!" Hinata's blush deepened as she buried her face into her coat.

"I mean, I could see your reasons man, but I like em nice and big!" Kiba's mouth twisted into a perverted grin as he mimed groping hands.

Time to shut this DxD perv-fest down ASAP.

"Listen, I could meet a girl with the tits of the century, but she could also be the most evil person in existence," I placed both my hands behind my head as a sneer wormed its way across my face. "So yeah, if she's a bitch, then fuck her...that came out wrong."

"Pfft! Yeah, it did...but I getcha," the dog-nin let out a snicker. "That's kinda the reason seduction missions exist in the first place. I remember one thing from the history books, at least."

"I'm guessing it's because there was a picture of a naked woman in it," Shino deadpanned.

"Y-Yeah, it was that page…"

"They went into a lot more detail on it in kunoichi class…" Hinata muttered.

"Are you saying we're lost?!"

I tilted my head at Kurenai's shout. "Well, looks like my 'amazing' sensei has gotten us lost."

"Really? Shit, she's really trying to kill me…" Kiba groaned.

"Get over yourself. She's trying to get rid of me first."

"Oi, gaki!" the purple-haired woman suddenly darted over and grabbed me by the ear. "Get over here, I need you."

I let out a tired sigh as my sensei pulled me over to the dark-haired Jōnin. "Alright, so what do you need me for?"

"Anko and I need to go over the map, and we need somebody to handle the prisoner," Kurenai glanced to her friend nervously for a split second before looking back to me. "She recommended you hold him for a bit."

"Me? You honestly think I'd be able to handle him if he tried to escape?"

"You can handle it...just use your 'special' trick," my sensei said slyly.

"...If you mean my Hamon, I don't know every technique there is to know, so-"

"You know what I mean!" Anko facepalmed at my blank expression before glaring at me. She then mouthed the word 'Stand' to me, before leaning forward. "Use whatever force is necessary if he tries to get away."

"...I understand."

"Good! Here, take these chains!" my Jōnin sensei shoved the chains in my hands before I could properly react. As she pulled out the map, she waved me towards the other three genin. "Go bring him over there. They can help you if he escapes."

"Yare Yare...whatever…" I pulled at the chains slightly as I began moving back to the others. Before I had even gotten a foot away, I felt resistance on the bindings. I turned to see Eiki digging his heels into the ground as best he could. "Oi! What's your problem? If you escape-"

"I'm not trying to escape," the man huffed. "I'm just making this difficult. The Jōnin scare me, but you don't…" Eiki turned to me with a small sneer. "You're just a genin, I don't need to worry about you."

"...Is that so?"

"Yes! You probably couldn't even catch me if I did escape!"

"...Really?"

"Really!"

"Really?"

"Really!"

"Really?!"

"REALLY!"

"Sutā Purachina!"

"W-Wait, what-"

*VRRRRRRRRRMMMMM*

"Oof!" Eiki blinked as he looked at the now shocked genin directly in front of him. "H-How did I get over here?"

"Eep!"

"Woah! The hell?!"

Shino turned to me and tilted his head. "Would you mind explaining to us how you pulled that off?"

"...I used a really strong genjutsu," I said simply.

Almost an hour later

"Okay, we know we're in a stretch of woods, we just don't know which one we're in."

"Anko, we're on a road. We just need to find some identifying landmarks, or an intersection."

"Yeah, but we'd need to travel around for a while to get to a roadway sign or something."

I sighed in annoyance as the two Jōnin continued their argument over the map. Beside me, Kiba was regaling us with some strange tale of one of Team 8's D-Rank missions, to which I barely paid any attention to. I noticed that Hinata would turn to glance at the prisoner I held every so often, only turning away if she caught either Eiki or myself staring.

"-And that's just another reason why I hate cats. I mean, I get that that's probably a huge stereotype about my clan...but come on, Tora is a monster," Kiba finished, turning to me with a curious expression. "Oi, were you even listening?"

"Yeah, you were telling me about the D-Rank you got where you had to grab Tora," I said blithely. A small snort escaped my nose as I turned to the dog-nin. "If I could tell you about my mission to grab him...well, you remember the storm last month, right?"

"Pfft! Who doesn't remember that?"

"Well, I had to go right to the center of it and get him."

"...You were really at the tornado?!" Kiba cried out.

"Yeah, that's why Bitch-sensei was wearing a sling on her arm the first time you saw her," I let out a dark chuckle as I remembered Tora and his Stand. "It was all that damn cat's fault."

"So he really is a monster…" the Inuzuka said with wide eyes.

"A-Ano, I don't really get why everybody talks about Tora-chan like that…" the Hyūga said nervously.

...Wait, Tora-chan?

Hinata caught my owlish look and blushed slightly. "He likes me at least. Whenever we had to retrieve him, I could just go up to him and he'd jump in my arms."

"...That fucking cat!" I growled.

"What horrible thing would a cat do to get that reaction?" the girl asked.

"You...have no idea…" I turned back to the arguing Jōnin with an annoyed huff. "I just wish they'd get this over with. I'm getting all...antsy about this…"

"You want to know what it was, don't you?"

I quickly turned around to face Murasaki with a glare. "I don't care why you were arrested! Don't bother-"

"I wasn't talking to you," the prisoner said blankly, looking over to the nervous Hyūga with an emotionless gaze. "She keeps staring, so I figured she must want to know."

"Well, she doesn't need to know, and neither do the rest of us!" I growled. "Just keep quiet until we get to Kannabi, and then you can complain to the Iwa nin sent to grab you. Do you understand-"

"47 and 6," Eiki said tiredly.

"...I'm not interested in playing games with you," I turned away from the criminal with a huff. "Guys, ignore him. Hinata, quit staring at him, he's-"

"Who gave you the right to tell us what to do?" Kiba growled.

"I'm holding the dangerous criminal who is also a former ninja!" I held up both the chains. "If I'm saying to ignore him so that he doesn't screw with your head, it's probably a good idea."

"Screw with our-not all criminals are crazy masterminds trying to worm their way into your mind, that's just a stereotype!"

"And you think he isn't that kind of criminal?"

"...Let me get back to you on that one."

"Yeah, thought so…" I turned back to face our arguing senseis along with the others. "Just wait for them to figure out the map, and then-"

"I was arrested for the rape of fourty-seven women and the murder of six."

I felt a chill going down my spine as soon as he said it. My free hand twitched visibly as the other three turned to stare at the man. Already, the golden glow of my Stand surrounded me as I turned to glare at him.

Murasaki simply stared at me with the same blank expression he had been wearing since we first saw him. "You look very angry...did I hit a nerve?" the prisoner leaned forward, a small glint of amusement flashing through his eyes. "It almost looks like you're willing to jeopardize the mission after hearing that. How do you feel, knowing that you're in a situation where you could easily be both perfectly in control of or helpless in, if things go wrong."

"...What are you implying?"

"What would happen if I escaped? Wouldn't I try to run away as fast as possible?" he tilted his head casually, glancing between all of us for a bit. "Or, perhaps, you should be imagining the worst-case scenario, no?"

"...Hinata, go to Kurenai-sensei," Kiba said coldly.

"W-What?! B-But I-"

"Hinata, do as he says," Shino said flatly.

Hinata stared at the three of us for several seconds before her expression turned fierce. "I'm not scared!"

Eiki let out a small chuckle before cocking his head to the side, his blank expression never leaving. Then a smile stretched across his face, all the way to his ears, and his eyes bugged out in the most horrifying way possible.

"Boo!"

"EEEP!" the blue-haired girl jumped back and ran towards the two arguing Jōnin, much to their surprise.

I glanced at the terrified girl from the corner of my eye, then turned back to the prisoner with a snarl. Unsurprisingly, his blank expression had once again returned, and he was tilting his head at us mockingly.

"Oh, you seem angrier than before. Is she your girlfriend or something?"

"Do you pride yourself on being a bastard?"

Eiki shrugged blithely at this. "Maybe I do."

"Wonderful! As if being stuck with a psychopath wasn't enough…" I tilted my head as our senseis walked over, Hinata hiding behind them nervously. "Did she give you the rundown?"

"Pretty much, yeah," Anko took the chains from my hands while sending the prisoner a disdainful look. "He do anything other than scare ya?"

"I'm not scared of him," I said stiffly. "I'm just really pissed off…"

"That's just your default emotion, so not really anything to worry about," my sensei turned to her fellow Jōnin. "Is she gonna be alright?"

"She'll be fine," Kurenai said tiredly. She turned back to Anko with an exasperated look. "Are you sure we'll be on the right route?"

"Hey, we worked out the map, didn't we?"

I gave the purple-haired women a sideways glance. "Please tell me that you're not just gonna wing it."

"I find your lack of faith disturbing," my Jōnin sensei gave me a confused stare at my deadpan look. "What? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, let's just get rid of this creep already…"

Kannabi Town

Afternoon

"Alright, here we are!" Anko cried out cheerfully. "The one and only Kannabi Town! A fun tourist destination and summer vacation spot!"

I couldn't fathom why she would refer to it as that, especially since she clearly saw the place once we got here. Kannabi town was the literal asshole of the Land of Weeds...and that was the kindest thing I could say about it.

Of the few actual buildings that made up the 'town', only two of them looked like they were well kept. The others looked abandoned or right at the cusp of abandonment, and there were several that looked like they hadn't even been finished being built. Trash sparsely lined the street or hung from a few trees.

Around most of the buildings, I could see thugs and gangsters either defacing the already derelict buildings, or showing off their latest hauls for appraisal. A few even looked our way and seemed to be sizing us up, clearly ignoring the fact that we were ninja. I was hopeful that nobody would try anything...but stupidity is an art form after all.

"Alright, first plan of action! Find a couple of rooms at the local motel and hold the prisoner there, then meet the Iwa entourage sent to grab him at the bridge," Anko smiled widely at the four of us. "We'll just collect the bounty and get the fuck out, C-Rank is done and we get extra money than we would D-Rank."

"Wait, there's a bridge?" Kiba asked in confusion.

Kurenai snorted at the question. "Correction, there was a bridge. It was destroyed during the Third Shinobi War-"

"Kakashi did it!" my sensei interjected. "He never said anything other than that. I'm guessing it's because of how he lost something or whatnot."

...Wow! That was an incredibly gross understatement of that entire event.

"So, first off...we're gonna need two of you gaki to hold the prisoner down while we meet with the Iwa contingent…" my Jōnin sensei tilted her head thoughtfully as she looked us over. "Maybe you guys could play Jan-Ken over-"

"We are not playing Jan-Ken over who gets to hold down a dangerous criminal!" I cried out.

"Kami, you have to be such a wet blanket…" the purple-haired woman sighed before turning to Kiba and Shino. "You two, you can hold him while we collect the bounty."

"Why us?!" the dog-nin cried out.

"Y'know, believe it or not there was a reason Team 8 was specifically chosen for this mission," Anko leaned forward with a wild grin. "Just think about it, an Inuzuka, an Aburame, and a Hyūga. Why do you think they'd be useful for this?"

"...Uh, I...I don't know, actually."

"It's pretty obvious," Kurenai said boredly. "Shino already has dozens of his Kikaichū tagging the prisoner-"

"Hrrk!" Eiki doubled over in disgust. "Kami, I could have gone without knowing that…"

"Hinata can use the Jūken to disable his pressure points, and if he somehow manages to escape that, then you and Akamaru could hunt him down," the dark-haired Jōnin cupped a hand to her chin in thought. "Honestly, the only outlier there is Joushirou...I suppose his Hamon could be useful if all else fails, since it's pretty unpredictable in how it functions."

"Oh shit, the old man didn't tell you?" Anko chuckled nervously at her friend's owlish look. "Hehe...I'll tell you later. He's only supposed to use it as a last resort anyway, I don't want him relying on it all the time."

"...The hell is she talking about?" the dog-nin growled.

I flinched slightly and glanced at him from the corner of my eye. "I have a...Bloodline, I guess is the best way to describe it."

"Like Naruto-kun…" Hinata blinked wildly when she realized what she just said. "N-Not that I'd know anything about that! I just assumed he had one, because when we saw him that one time there was all that...red stuff, and...A-Ano, I-"

"Ok, so what? You, Blondie, and the Uchiha are in some super secret Bloodline club?"

"I believe they offered me a membership, but I had to decline," Shino said flatly.

"Wonderful…" Kiba grumbled. "So what, we just need to find the motel?"

"Yeah, I'm guessing it's one of the nicer buildings," Anko tilted her head at one of the nicer buildings in town. "I'm guessing it's that one, considering it's a bit bigger than the others."

Kurenai hummed thoughtfully. "Alright, Anko and I should be able to pay for-"

"I'll pay for the room."

"Wait, what?!" my Jōnin sensei rounded on me with an owlish look. "Y-You're joking, right? You don't need to pay fo-"

"I can pay for it, and the old man will probably reimburse me when he hears about it," I waved my hand blithely. "Besides, we need two rooms anyway. One will be where we keep the prisoner."

"And where will you sleep then?"

"With the prisoner," I said flatly. "Kiba and Shino too."

"Oi, I never agreed to that!" the Inuzuka cried out.

"Are you sure about that? You'd be safer sleeping with us," Kurenai gave me a concerned look. "I know he's in chains but-"

"So, you're saying that the three of you would be fine being in the same room with three teenage boys?" I cocked my head to the side as the girl's began to pale. "One of whom is a self-admitted pervert?"

"Oi! I never said anything like that!"

"I was talking about myself," I gave the dog-nin a deadpan look.

Kiba rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Ah, never mind then...wait! Don't leave me out dammit!"

"Fine! Two of which are self-admitted perverts," I quickly amended.

"That's better!" the Inuzuka said smugly. It was only after a few seconds that he realized what he had done. "Shit! That's not what I-"

"Alright, I can understand your...reasoning," the dark-haired woman said nervously. "If you're really sure about paying-"

"Relax, it's no skin off my back," I said nonchalantly. "Now come on, I have a feeling we might not be welcome in this town. The longer we stay out in the open, the more likely it is those thugs will try their luck with us."

Anko blinked in confusion. "Eh? Why would they be all pissed off at us?"

"It's not like Kakashi destroyed their bridge or something…"

As we got closer to the local motel, I noticed a girl sweeping outside. As if Kiba's muttered 'here we go again' was tempting fate, she turned to face us as we approached. The moment she spotted me, a deep blush spread across her face, instantly filling me with dread.

"Uh, h-hello there! How can I help you?"

On one hand, she might constantly annoy me whenever she gets the chance...on the other hand, she was pretty easy on the eyes. She had a cute, round face that held adorable moe doe-eyes, all framed by long brown hair done up in pigtails. While she was wearing a rather plain dress, I could see the beginnings of a very generous figure.

Still...no, just no…

"This is the local motel, right?" I asked boredly.

"A-Ano, it is. My Baasan is running the-" the girl sputtered nervously as I walked past her, and I could already feel her deepening blush as she swooned behind me. "W-Wow…"

"Damn, you really need to get laid gaki," Anko said as we walked inside.

"I...am...13…" I growled under my breath.

"And you also regularly drink Sake and...whatever that red stuff from the west is called."

"It's for Hamon Techniques. I'm not even 16 yet you creepy bitch!"

"Hey, old enough to kill, old enough to-"

"Anko, do not!" Kurenai chided sternly. "Sorry Joushirou, she doesn't really have a filter about this."

"It's not like I ain't used to it," I said hotly. "Naruto is always going on about what he sees in the hot springs-fair warning, he's been using shadow clones and fūinjutsu to avoid getting caught."

"Thanks for the heads up then…"

"What, he could just ask," Hinata muttered lower than the others could hear.

I let out a small huff before walking towards the front desk and dinging the little bell. The ring sat in the air for half a minute before dissipating, yet no one came to the front desk again. I seriously considered ringing again, only for Kiba to jump forward and scrutinize the little bell.

"Hot damn! I've never actually seen one of these things before," the dog-nin tilted his head around as he stared at the metal contraption in awe. "Most places back home don't have these."

"That's because restaurants and motels back in Konoha have more staff," I felt a tick mark appearing on my forehead as the Inuzuka held his hand out to ding the bell again. "I already did it before, they heard."

"It's been like 3 minutes, they haven't heard shit!" Kiba's hand came down on the bell, causing another ring to erupt into the air.

There was a short shuffling far in the back, followed by some muffled curses, but still no one came to the front desk. My expression hardened slightly, and I decided to ring the bell again myself in hopes of a response.

"Damn it! Ichiko, you useless girl! Handle the front desk!"

...Well, this will certainly be a pleasant afternoon, won't it?

"Oh kami, this is just great," my Jōnin sensei grumbled. The purple-haired woman sneered at the empty desk before ringing the bell herself. "Time for the big show~!"

"ICHIKO! WHAT DID I JUST SAY?!" a vicious looking hag emerged from a door to the back, a hateful expression stretched across her thin and wrinkled visage with enough malic that it could make small children cry. The hag faltered slightly once she caught sight of us, or rather, our headwear. "What the hell do you want?!"

"Two rooms," I deadpanned. "I have enough money to pay for them-"

"Piss off!" she growled hatefully. "I wouldn't give you our worst room even if you were the fucking Hokage, you little shit!" the hag tilted her head and sneered. "Let me guess, that useless girl said the same thing, and you took exception to that? At least clean up the body before you leave."

"...Did you just accuse us of murder?" Kiba croaked.

"What of it? That's all you ninja do, kill and destroy," she waved her hand to the right. "Just look at our damn bridge!"

"Ah, I see they're all still a bit testy about that…" Kurenai said nervously.

"Now where's my worthless granddaughter?!"

"Outside, sweeping," I said boredly.

"Ah, right...I told her to make sure everything outside and up front was spotless. Doubtful she'll manage it, she'll definitely get less food tonight then…"

If I really felt like giving up my chivalrous ways, it would be now. It was taking every fucking ounce of control to not deck this woman with the Steely Dan treatment like she deserved.

"Oi! What are you creeps still doing here?! Didn't I just tell you to take a hike?!" the hag growled, once again testing my infinite patience. "If you don't leave, I'll-"

"What's going on out there?!"

I cocked my head to the side as an old man came out from the back. The way his skin stretched over his gaunt face as his mouth twisted into grimace upon seeing us was a clear selling point that even Dario Brando could look passive and harmless. The old man gently pushed the beast I assumed he was married to out of the way and gave the worst customer service smile I had ever seen in either of my lives.

"Good afternoon, how may I help you?"

I ignored his strained voice and leaned forward. "We need two rooms for the night, one with three beds and…" I glanced to the side thoughtfully. "One with four."

The old man's smile turned into the biggest shit-eating grin as he spoke. "I'm sorry, I'm afraid we don't have any vacant rooms at the moment."

"W-What about all those vacant rooms over there?" Kiba asked, pointing to the vacant rooms on our right.

The motel owner took a deep breath and gave us all a sickeningly sweet smile. "My apologies, but like I said, we do not have any vacant rooms at the moment."

"Fucking liar!" the dog-nin growled. "You can't turn us away for no reason! We have money, we can pay-"

"Kiba, just calm down," Kurenai said gently. "We'll just camp out in the woods."

"Yes, you do that," the hag said mockingly. "Spend some time with all the shitty wild animals and bugs like you deserve."

"I feel quite insulted…" Shino deadpanned.

"How about this," I began, setting the old man with a stern glare. "We'll walk out that door...if, and only if, you can leave the front desk right now."

"...Leave the front desk? Is that it?" the fat old bastard began laughing wildly. "Just cause you've got some damn ninja bullshit doesn't mean shit, gaki! This is my damn motel, I can leave the front desk all I want."

"And what would happen if you couldn't?" Anko asked curiously.

"Then I guess I'll have to give you your rooms...but there's a fat chance of that ever happening!" he pointed to us with a vicious sneer as he began to walk away from the desk. "So just try and fucking stop me you shitty shinobi!"

*VRRRRRRRRRMMMMM*

"E-Eh?! The hell?!" the old man leaned back a bit and blinked in shock. "I...I was sure I was walking away before. I was almost right at the door, how did I get back here?" he slowly backed away while setting us with a harsh glare. "You think you have it figured out, huh? Don't even think about trying anything, I'll know you've done it you-"

*VRRRRRRRRRMMMMM*

A startled gasp escaped his throat as he once again found himself at the spot he had tried to escape from. "W-What the hell is this?! How, how?! That's not possible," the motel owner looked around for any sort of explanation. "This just doesn't make sense, I was looking right at you creeps!"

I let out a mocking snort at the old man's confusion. "You wanna try again, Jiji? We can do this all day…"

"It's a what?!"

"Would you quiet down!" Anko hissed to Kurenai as they walked towards Kannabi Bridge. The purple-haired woman turned back to look at her bored genin and her friend's kunoichi apprentice. "Alright, they haven't heard, good."

"I still can't believe this...a ghost? He has a ghost that fights for him?"

"It's not a ghost ghost, it's more like...his...soul, calling out to his psyche to harness his life energy and willpower to create a spirit-like entity that follows his every mental command because it's connected to his mind, body, and spirit," Anko shrugged blithely. "At least, that's how the Hokage says it apparently works."

"And...it looks like...a person?"

"A buff purple and blue man with long hair," the snake-user snorted. "We saw another one too, it looks like a giant horse made of clouds."

"So, it just comes out of him and...what? Does it do anything?"

"Beats the shit outta things if the kid wants to beat the shit outta things...but only if they're within like 2 meters of the kid," Anko sighed in annoyance at her friend's owlish expression. "Yeah, I know, it sounds asinine. We tested it though, it can move out of 2 meters but it gets weaker and slower* when it does."

"So, he just uses it to beat things up?" Kurenai cupped a hand to her chin contemplatively. "I guess it's...unexpected, in a sense. If it's as strong as you're saying, it would throw anybody for a loop."

"It's not just some punch-ghost that he can call out of him," the purple-haired woman chided. "It also has some sort of unique ability. All of them have one, the other guy in Konoha who has one improves the quality of food, the horse one controls weather-that's why we had the Typhoon a while back-and so on."

"The Typhoon was a-Ugh, y'know what, I'll open that can of worms later," the dark-haired Jōnin slyly glanced at the boy walking several feet behind them. "What does he do?"

"We...we haven't figured it out yet," Anko said sheepishly. "We have a bunch of theories, and we've been trying to take everything into account."

"...We?"

"Me, Iruka, and the old man," the snake-user declared. "What we know so far is that his Stand moves at the speed of light, is strong enough to, in his own words, 'crush diamonds', and moves with greater precision than even the world's best surgeon."

"And what theories did you have based on that?"

"Teleportation, super-speed, breaking down into particles of light to travel and attack-oh, and Iruka thought up the crazy idea that he can manipulate time."

"M-Manipulate...how?"

"He sees into the future, and if he sees something he doesn't like, he skips it so that it doesn't happen, or something like that," Anko waved her hand dismissively. "Nothing seems to fit right though. With that stunt at the motel, it looked like teleportation...but still…"

"...Maybe Iruka is on to something," Kurenai sighed at her friend's owlish look. "No, I don't think he's actually skipping time, or doing anything like that. Maybe his stand creates some sort of...loop, I suppose."

"Loop? What, he's turning back time?"

"No, no, it's more like he's using mind control to direct the movements of others while making everybody think he's rewound time and erased their memories of what they did before he made his 'rewind'. It's like a really powerful genjutsu, but he wouldn't need to use chakra for it."

"He did say that he was doing a genjutsu..." the purple-haired woman said contemplatively. "So far, it's between that, super-speed, and teleportation."

The dark-haired Jōnin hummed thoughtfully. "Sooner or later, he'll have to reveal it himself. I've never met a ninja who was able to their unique bloodline, jutsu, or secret strategy to themselves for that long."

"I guess you're right...my bet is that he won't be able to make it past next Chūnin Exams."

"Fifty five thousand Ryō says he does."

"You're on!" Anko let out a short giggle before looking over her shoulder. "So, what was your kunoichi doing in her genjutsu anyway?"

"Ah...I'll tell you later, I need to talk to her about it anyway…"

"So, this is Kannabi Bridge, huh?" I tilted my head curiously. "He really blew it up, didn't he?"

It was an old bridge made of white stone, with brick colored railings. The bits of the metal beams jutted out of the stone where the bridge would have continued, and the faint remains of the piers sat in the river. On the other side, I could see several more buildings making up the town, these ones definitely abandoned judging by their appearance.

"Yeah, he and his old team took out a whole two thirds of the thing," Anko noticed Hinata's shocked expression and sighed. "It was during the 3rd Shinobi War, just around the end. It was either this or leave ourselves wide open to an invasion by Iwa."

"Speaking of which," Kurenai motioned to a dark shape in the trees near the other side of the bridge. "That's at least one of them, I can assume."

I narrowed my eyes at the shape as I absentmindedly fingered the hilt of my tanto. From my left hand, the glass of water I had kept sealed in my sleeve slid into my hand as I willed Hamon into it in a desperate attempt to get the technique to work. The results were...surprising, to say the least.

"Six of them," I said lowly. "The one peeking out from behind the tree, and five others who are hiding behind them and one of the buildings."

"Did you actually just get it down?" my Jōnin sensei whispered.

"No, more like I'm getting a rough estimate on things. It's still not perfected yet," I hissed.

"Yeah, whatever…" Anko cocked her head to the side. "Oi! We know you're here, come on out!"

The shape behind the tree let out a short huff before flickering out of existence, only to appear on the other side of the river. He was a serious looking man in the standard Jōnin attire of Iwagakure. The man stared at us blankly for several seconds before cocking his head to the side with a toothy sneer.

"Where's the prisoner?"

"Back at the motel," Anko jabbed her finger in the direction behind us.

"The agreement was a prisoner extradition," the Iwa Jōnin growled. "You either hand him over or-"

"Hold up! Konoha never explicitly agreed to an actual extradition," my sensei let out a small chuckle. "We just said we'd bring him to you. He's got a bounty on his head, now pay up."

The man's mouth opened and closed for several seconds as he glared at us. "You...you bitch! You can't-"

"Oi, Keizan! This shit is taking too long!"

I blinked as a dark haired girl flickered into existence behind the Jōnin, a scowl directed at all of us in general. The only reason I knew she was a girl was her voice, and the skirt, but there wasn't much to go on aside from that. She looked...familiar, I suppose...something about a part of Shippuden I probably missed a while back, maybe?

...Oh well.

"Gaah! Kurotsuchi! We're supposed to stay put!"

"Shut it Masaoka! She's right, this is already boring as hell."

"You're both so annoying…"

I watched as three more ninja emerged from the trees. The first was a cheerful short-haired blonde with their hitai-ate worn like a bandana, and they were definitely a Jōnin. While they carried themself the same way as their comrade, they didn't seem as hostile or wary of us.

The next two that came out were a Chūnin and another genin. The genin was a tired looking boy with dark-brown hair going to his shoulders in small braids. Currently, he was glaring at the Chūnin at his side.

The Chūnin didn't look like he even belonged in the ninja forces, all things considered. He was a thin stick of a guy in his early teens, his glasses were pushed against his eyes as though everything needed to be as clear as possible. The worst part was the fact that he couldn't quite stand still, he jolted and squirmed as though some animal were running across his body beneath his clothes.

"G-Guys...I have to…"

"Good Kami, Masaoka! You went an hour ago! Your medical problems suck!"

"Masaoka? As in, like Masaoka Kurogane?" Anko asked curiously. "The most useless ninja in all of history?"

"R-Recent history!" the bespectacled boy called over to us. "And...y-yeah, he was my father…"

"Oof! That's rough kid!"

I ignored my Jōnin sensei's laughter as I scrutinized the Iwa nin across from us. There was some sort of...feeling in the air. An electrical feeling that was eerily familiar enough to fill me with dread.

"Leave him alone, Senra," a new voice called out. "You can be an asshole when we're not busy."

...Too big. The thing strapped to that guys back was too big to be called a sword. Too big, too thick, too heavy, and too rough. It was more like a large hunk of raw metal sharpened at the edges and end and strapped to a stick.

I hadn't even registered the wielder until after I had taken my eyes off the sword. He was genin around my age, similar height and build, though much tanner and with dark-black hair and amber colored eyes. And somehow he was carrying that thing on his back like it was nothing.

"Kyōaku Ha…" I swallowed a lump in my throat as I tried to contain my awe. "I can't believe it, I'm actually seeing it in person."

"E-Eh? What are you talking about?" Hinata asked nervously.

"A few hundred years ago, during the beginning of the Nidaime Mizukage's reign, the first Seven Swordsman of the mist were renown for being able to bring down an entire country," a short sigh escaped my throat. "Naturally, the guys who made the swords were pretty proud of their work, save for the one who didn't get any of the credit. He came together with several of the Uzumaki clansmen who helped make the original blades, as well as some of the greatest weaponsmiths in the other four great nations, to create a weapon for each nation that could rival the Seven Swords, even all of them at once, just to stick it to the mist."

"A-Ano, they made weapons to combat the Seven Swords?"

"At least five of them, off the top of my head. Of them include the Ryūjin, which grants its user all five chakra natures, and there's that mace Kotetsu has that can shapeshift, and of course…" I motioned to the boy with the giant sword on his back. "Kyōaku Ha, which can send its wielder into a rage-like state if they activate its unique ability."

"It can also cut ghosts," the bored genin said. "I've tested it out a few times."

"It can really cut ghosts?!" I wheezed out.

"How do you test that? Ghosts aren't even-Ok, we'll deal with that later," Anko growled.

"Yeah, like the Konoha bitch said!" 'Senra' growled to his fellow genin. "A giant piece of metal on a stick isn't something to be proud of, it's just compensation!"

"You're just jealous that I have the ghost-killing sword, and you don't," the sword-wielder said teasingly.

"Isashi, that's enough," the blonde chided sternly. They turned to us with a nervous grin, their expression falling slightly. "Ah, you don't seem to have the prisoner with you…"

"We wanted to wait until you had the bounty," Kurenai said cooly.

"B-Bounty? This is just a prisoner-"

"Konoha never actually said it, Okashī," 'Keizan' growled spitefully. "Just as expected of the leaf. They see a chance to screw with us, they'll take it."

"S-So, we aren't bringing the prisoner back?"

"Not unless you have money~" Anko sing-songed.

"Gaaah! Dammit all!" the androgynous blonde cried out. "If we don't come back with that prisoner, the Tsuchikage will have our heads!"

The girl who was apparently called Kurotsuchi sweatdropped. "Really? You're saying that?"

"Be quiet!" they cried out, waving their hands at the girl in annoyance. "You have no idea how stressful this is!"

"Che, whatever…" Kurotsuchi cocked her head to the side as she glared at us. "Are you really sure you wanna do this, Konoha?"

"Oh, what are you gonna do? Come across the bridge to get us?!"

"Anko, don't taunt them!" Kurenai hissed.

Anko's response was to give the Iwa nin across from us the american style double hand symbol for 'Fuck Off'...then the french style...then the appropriate japanese style...then the italian. I was very confused as to how many different birds there were in this world.

"Yare Yare Daze...you're really mature, aren't you Anko-sensei?"

"Shut it, gaki! I'm negotiating."

"...Do you hear yourself? How the hell is that anything resembling negotiati-"

"Y'know what! Fine, we'll get your damn bounty!" Keizan shouted over to us. "If our village allows it, we'll pay up. But we have to get that prisoner back!"

"As long as you can pay~" the purple-haired woman sing-songed.

"Fine then!" the girl shouted over to us. "Have him here by tomorrow bitch!"

"Sure thing!" Anko called out cheerfully. A short giggle escaped her mouth as the Iwa nin skulked back into the trees. "I think that went pretty well."

"They'll probably send another few people down with the bounty...do you have all the insults prepared?" Kurenai asked.

"I have the whole book list we all wrote down. I think I can make a couple up on the spot," my Jōnin sensei turned to me with a smirk. "Oi, gaki! Think you can come up with some insults for the Iwa nin?"

"The only thing I can think of is the 'dumb as rocks' stuff," I said tiredly. "And I can't even think of a compensation joke for that one guy because there's a swordsman code about that."

"You're saying you can't make compensation jokes to other swordsmen?"

"No, I can, but we have to be fighting first."

"So swordfight banter is usually just bashing each others junk? Why am I not surprised," the purple-haired woman groaned. "What, at least tell me you have good comebacks. I'd be disappointed if you didn't."

"Reality is often disappointing," I said nonchalantly. "But I have at least one that I used on my rival about 'representation'..."

"Phew, good to know we weren't kicked out…" Anko looked around the motel lobby nervously. "We haven't done anything to get kicked out yet, have we?"

Hinata twiddle her fingers before discreetly activating her Byakugan. "They're still in their room, talking about...something, I assume boy talk," the Hyūga blushed slightly before flinching. "Akamaru is also growling at the prisoner. Not much else is going on aside from that."

"What about our…'hosts'?" my Jōnin sensei asked lowly.

The bluenette glanced around nervously before letting out a small sigh. "That poor girl...they're just hurling another round of abuse at her."

"How are those monsters her legal guardians?" I growled.

"Next of kin, shit like that. Doesn't matter what they do, they still have legal precedent over her and whatever estate she owns," Anko looked in the direction of the shouting sympathetically. "If she has anything left at all."

I clicked my teeth angrily as the shouting died down. "As if the creepy rapist wasn't bad enough. People like them make me sick."

"Hey, life sucks sometimes," the purple-haired woman blinked as we rounded the corner before our rooms. "The hell is this?"

Before us, Ichiko was furiously scrubbing the floors. The brunette flinched at our presence, but ignored regardless.

"What happened here?" Kurenai asked gently.

"The floors needed cleaning," Ichiko said blankly.

"Whew, didn't know there was a spill," Anko said nonchalantly. "Well, it's getting pretty dark...have a good night, it was nice meeting you...uh…" my Jōnin sensei tapped her chin nervously as she tried to remember the girl's name. "Uh...nice meeting you kid."

The doe-eyed girl responded with a small hum that the others barely heard as they walked off. Hinata lingered alongside me for a few seconds before darting after Kurenai. When I was sure they were gone, I turned to Ichiko with a concerned glance.

"Why are you really scrubbing?"

"...My grandparents...they think your presence is b-befouling. I'm supposed to clean up after all of you, e-even if there's nothing to clean up."

I facepalmed to hide my disgusted expression and clenched my fist. "Yare Yare Daze...Screw it!" my hands came down as I quickly made a familiar set of hand seals. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Two perfect clones of myself popped into existence beside me, and I motioned them towards the girl. Both of them grabbed the extra cleaning supplies and got to work, much to Ichiko's surprise.

"N-No, you don't have to-"

"None of that! I can't leave you alone like this...also," I pointed to my clones. "Once they dispel, I'll gain all their memories. You can use them to vent if you want...you look like you need that."

"Grrrrrrrrrrr!"

"Akamaru, quit growling at him! There's no chance he's getting out!" Kiba leaned back on his bed tiredly. "Ugh, I feel like we'll die in this place and people will eat our skin."

"Arf?"

"Yeah, I know it isn't a seedy motel...there's that nice bit of eye-candy nearby too at least," the dog-nin sighed. "But still, you saw how those old bastards looked at us, right?"

"Arf…" the dog held his paws to his face worriedly.

"I'm more worried we'll be attacked by Iwa nin in the middle of the night," I said boredly.

"Oh yeah...you said the one had a famous sword?"

"Kyōaku Ha, one of the five weapons of the continental nations," Shino called out from the bathroom. "There are at least...what, two other swords among them?"

"Ryūjin's location is unknown...and I don't actually know the name of the other sword," I tilted my head in thought. "The only other one I know about is that mace."

"Mace? What mace?" Kiba asked nervously.

"Eh, there's this Chūnin back home that has this shapeshifting mace...I think he called it 'Shussebora' once."

"Huh, that's interesting...Oi, shino! You done in there yet?"

"N-Not quite…"

"I still don't get why you need to be in the bathroom to change. I changed into my PJs a while ago," the dog-nin sneered at the prisoner. "If you looked at-"

"I'm straight...and you're 12. Not a chance in hell."

Shino exited the bathroom nervously, flinching away from us as we stared. "I do this because of my hive."

"What, you're worried we'll see your hive holes?"

"Arf!" the little dog yipped in agreement.

"I cannot believe you two are calling them that," I said tiredly. I pulled off my coat and grabbed the ends of my shirt. "Well, since we're heading to be anyway."

"Woah, you're not pulling out your pajamas?"

"I sleep with my shirt off, alright," I made a shrug as best as I could. "It just feels more comfortable, alright."

"Okay then, that's kinda-EH?! What's with the tattoo?!"

"...T-Tattoo?"

"That fucking star up there!"

I pulled my shirt off completely before turning to Kiba. "You...you mean this?" I reached around my shoulder and palmed the star birthmark on the back of my shoulder. "This is my family birthmark. My mom had one just like it."

"Nu-uh! You're joking, right?"

"He isn't, I've seen the pictures in his wallet," Shino tilted his head contemplatively. "I saw it in one of the photos of his grandfather as well."

"Dude, that's just...wow…" the dog-nin shook his head. "If I've read enough manga, that's like some chosen one bull-OK, that one has to be a tattoo!"

I cocked my head to the side at the Inuzuka's remark. "You mean...oh, yeah, these are more like burn marks," I held a hand to one of the letters burned in a strange arrangement across my chest. "I got them...well, it's been about seven years now, I think."

"What do those even mean? What kind of symbols are th-"

"Conscience."

I turned to Murasaki with a glare. "What was that?"

"They're letters from a western language, and together they translate to 'conscience'," the prisoner tilted his head curiously. "Although, I don't know why they're arranged like that."

"How do you know-"

"One of the Tsuchikage's aids, his parents were from the west. Somehow they emigrated to Iwa and had a kid," Eiki shrugged boredly. "I don't know how it all worked, since most people are wary of westerners and whatnot."

I hummed thoughtfully at this. "That's an interesting piece of information."

"Bullshit, everybody in your spy network already knows," the prisoner sneered at us darkly. "Just because I'm a criminal, doesn't mean I'm gonna give you anything like that. I can still hold out hope for better treatment, after all."

Kiba let out an annoyed huff. "What, you honestly think there's something out there that can save your ass?"

"...Who knows? I'm still not telling you anything," Eiki clicked his teeth and turned away from us. "It's not like it would matter anyway."

I furrowed my brows in confusion. "What do you mean by that?"

"...You'll see soon enough."

A few hours later

As Anko laid on her bed, she felt something rubbing her legs. Being barely awake, the woman thought nothing of it, even as the sensation traveled up to her thighs and stomach. The Jōnin let out an annoyed groan as she felt something moving close to her breasts.

"Hmmm...not tonight Iruka, I'm busy…"

A faint buzzing like white noise resounding through the air was the only response she received. The sensation of something groping around her chest and shoulders caused her to toss and turn in her sleep angrily.

"I said no...go away Iruka…"

Then something wet and slimy touched her throat. Anko's eyes snapped open in terror and she made to jolt upright. Her pupils dilated in terror when she found that she couldn't move an inch, even as she screamed within her own mind for her limbs to move.

All around her she could hear whispers and static noises, far off hissing noises and vicious wheezing, all accompanied by an unnerving chuckle. Her breathing grew ragged as she felt parts of her body going numb, and even though she couldn't move a muscle it almost seemed as though something was dragging her around by her feet. Staring above her was some horrid black face that seemed to be leering down at her with bright yellow eyes and pointed teeth.

'W-What is this?! I-I can't move!' the purple-haired woman let out a strangled breath as the slimy thing wrapped around her throat. 'C-Choking me?! I can't move a muscle, and something is choking me?! Damn it! Somebody, anybody, HELP ME!'

The Jōnin's pupils darted around wildly, searching anywhere for help. From the corner of her eye, she noticed Kurenai's sleeping form in a similar state, the dark-haired woman raggedly breathing as some unseen thing ran around her body. Anko's hands clammed up as a tear ran down her cheek.

'I'm...I'm going to die…' the woman thought. 'I can't believe it...I'm a ninja, I shouldn't go out like this, feeling so...helpless…' her breath hitched in her throat as the pressure around her neck increased. 'M-My breathing is getting cut off. It's not doing it like a snake where it would try to cut everything off as quickly as it could without getting hurt...it's doing this because it knows I can't fight back. This thing...it's enjoying this…'

Then, whatever the thing that was choking her was moved much of itself around her body. The kunoichi let out a horrified squeak as something coiled around her breasts and groped at her crotch. She went ghost pale upon realizing that death was the least she had to worry about.

'No! No! Stop! Get off! That's not for you! Ple-e-e-ease…' tears flowed freely from her eyes as something began propping her body up and pulling her limbs into different poses. 'Somebody make this stop! STOP!' a shudder spread through her body as the thing groping her darted beneath her clothes, running its slimy form over her skin before grabbing at her clothes and tearing. "N-NO!"

"Mmmmm...Anko-sensei, it's too late…"

From the corner of her eye, the purple-haired woman noticed her friend's pet kunoichi groggily leaning over to her. Anko desperately tried to lift an arm out to her, to no avail, and only let out a terrified whimper in response. Upon hearing this, and seeing the state of her sensei's friend, Hinata became fully alert.

"W-What the hell is that?!" the bluenette jumped off her bed and pointed at the terrified woman. Upon seeing her sensei, she went ghost pale. "K-Kurenai too?! It's...it's g-groping them! What is-EEEP!"

Anko's eyes widened in terror as a long white tendril snapped forward and wrapped around the young girl's hand. Instantly her eyes became lidded and she sagged to the floor, a loud whimper escaping her throat as more tendrils beset her. Her horrified protests were cut off as one wrapped around her throat.

The Jōnin let out a wild gasp as her body reflexively bucked beneath the thing's unwanted ministrations. 'STOP! SHE'S A GENIN, YOU CAN'T DO THIS!' another shudder of disgust went through her as her clothes were completely removed. 'I can't...no...why is this happening…'

"A-Anko-sensei…"

Her eyes went wide upon hearing the little Hyūga's voice. The thing pawing at her body had propped her up just enough that she could see the girl from the corner of her eye. The bluenette was weakly reaching out to her, desperately trying to get away from the tendrils holding her down.

"H-Have to save...A-Anko-sensei...I can't give up…" the poor girl winced and whimpered as a tendril strangled her arm and pulled at her throat. Her voice grew hoarse and feeble as she attempted to pull herself towards the woman. "My...Nindō...I can't...run...away…"

Anko froze as she saw the girl's eyes go dull and her face falling to the ground limply. The only sounds she continued to make were the strangled gasps from the thing choking her to death. The Jōnin could no longer take it.

She screamed as loud as she could, to the point that she would lose her voice and could feasibly rupture her vocal cords. It didn't matter as long as somebody heard her, whether it be the disgusting human beings that owned the motel or the other genin they were with, as long as somebody knew she needed help, she'd be saved.

Her scream was cut off several seconds later as something forced its way into her mouth and thrust itself into her throat. The woman gagged as the thing wormed its way in further, cutting off more of her already scarce air. The taste was familiar, but instead of being a metallic, bittersweet taste, it was an overly salty and foul tang that made her nose curl up in disgust. As two more tendrils grabbed at her neck and made a slow turning motion, a whimper escaped from her again.

As the thing grew closer to snapping her neck, she knew the next few tears would be her last.

"ORA!"

*CRASH*

There was a loud, inhuman screech, and Anko was suddenly falling back onto her bed as the thing was pulled off of her body. As soon as she regained the ability to move, she leaned up to see her lone genin throwing some white thing into the wall before pulling two similar entities off of Kurenai and Hinata. The boy's Stand (She had forgotten its name somewhat) began pummeling the thing as soon as it tried to move again, allowing the purple-haired woman to get a better look at it.

It was some sort of amorphous white blob, with long tendrils emerging from its body that were slowly retreating back into it as Joushirou pummeled it into the wall. The thing let out a loud screech as the Stands fists crashed into it, portions of its slimy body splashing off of it as it took more damage.

"H-Holy shit…" the Jōnin blinked in confusion as the boy's stand fell back a bit, only to flinch as he slammed a Hamon infused fist into the creature. "That's just...intense…"

"What the hell is that?!"

I let out a small huff at Kiba's exclamation. "I don't know, just that it's white, ugly, and it doesn't seem to be that solid."

"I mean the big purple person floating by you!" the dog-nin cried out. "What the actual fuck is that thing?! Are...are you possessed?! Is that some sort of Yōkai that's possessing you?!" his eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Are you even the real Joushirou?!"

"Shut. up!" I growled. I turned around just as a strangled gasp resounded behind me. "Are you guys…" I quickly held a hand up to my face to cover my sight. "Oh man…"

"What just happened?" Kurenai asked tiredly. "Joushirou...Kiba...Shino...Why are you in our room? This isn't-eh?" the dark-haired woman blinked in shock upon seeing Star Platinum. "Is that what it looks like? Holy shit Anko, you weren't jokin-wait a minute, why are you naked?!"

"K-Kurenai, you w-were asleep for the whole thing…" Anko said weakly, clearly fighting back a sob. "Also...y-you're...well…"

Kurenai looked down at herself and turned beet-red. "W-WHY AM I NAKED?!"

"I'm guessing whatever this thing is," I motioned to the slime creature I had pummeled into the wall. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Kiba's growing grin. "Oi! Quit staring at them you jackass!"

"What? Their boobs are on display, obviously-"

"They're not meant to be you idiot! Do you honestly think a woman would rip her own clothes off?!"

Kiba's expression fell at this and he turned away nervously. "I...I'm sorry…"

"WOULD SOMEBODY TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON ALREADY?!" Kurenai's wrath was cut short upon hearing her friend's quiet chuckle. "A-Anko, what's going on?"

"K-Kurenai-sensei...when I woke up, I saw that thing…" Hinata motioned to the white slime creature pathetically writhing on the floor. "It was...groping both of you, but you were asleep. It..it grabbed me, and I couldn't move."

Anko's chuckle turned into full on mad laughter. "Hehe...Hahahahaha! You...you were being grabbed at in your sleep, Kurenai...and you didn't even know...hehehhe…" she turned to the dark-haired woman with tears falling from her eyes. "That thing, it was doing something...making it so that I couldn't even move. I was being groped and choked to death, and you were too. And your first reaction is to get pissed at some brats? You have no fucking idea what was even going on!"

Kurenai went ghost pale and turned to stare at the slime creature. "Y-You're serious? I can't wrap my head around this…" she quickly covered up her chest and shied away from everyone. "I don't know how to process this-Agh!"

I sighed at the small shout she let out upon being hit by a blanket. "Listen, I know it's a lot to unpack, but I think you should cover up first," I turned to my Jōnin sensei and took a tentative step towards her. "A-Anko-sensei...are you-"

"Alright? No, never better…" the purple-haired woman let out a few sobbing chuckles before turning to me with a strained smile. "I...I think I'm gonna need a minute to cool down though, heh...oh, you have a blanket for me?"

"Yeah, I figured you'd want to-" my eyebrow raised as she took it from my hands. "Alright then...Hinata, are you alright?"

"I-I'm just a l-little shaken up," the bluenette said nervously. "But n-nothing was ripped."

"Good, if we had seen anything then Naruto would have kicked our asses…" I noticed Hinata's momentary blush and frowned. "What? What's wrong?"

"Uh...have you a-always had strange s-symbols burned into your chest?"

"Agh! I knew I should have gotten a shirt on," I flinched upon seeing Shino approaching the slime creature. "Hey, how's the prisoner doing?"

"My Kikaichū are updating me every minute. Murasaki hasn't left the room since we left," the bug-user tilted his head as he scrutinized the slime. "Curious...it looks defeated, but it's still here. It obviously isn't a summon...perhaps and effect of your…?"

"Stand, and I'll explain that later. Now-" I froze as the blob pulsated slightly. "Shino! Get out of the way!"

The Aburame didn't even need me to yell out to him. The moment a sharpened white tendril speared his way, he had already jumped out of reach. I charged forward while willing my Stand from my being once again, throwing forth another barrage of punches towards the disgusting blob.

I felt my eyes widen as the thing caught both of my Stand's fists in two tendrils shaped like amorphous arms. The rest of the creature soon followed, transforming into somewhat worm-like shape that undulated and waved as it held SP back. Soon, eye depressions appeared on its head, as did a mouth that was formed into a wild grin.

"What was that thing you said before?" the thing asked, much to all our shared surprise. It coiled upward as a chuckle emanated from it. "What you called that before...so, you're a User too, huh?"

"What?!" Anko cried out. "You...You're a..."

"No fucking way…" I said lowly. "This is...the work of an enemy Stand?!"

I know, I know, wrong time wrong place...but I never got to say it last time.

"Well, I'll be damned! You're pretty slick, kid, interrupting my 'fun time' like that," a white tongue lolled out of the slime creatures mouth. "To be honest, I was just here to off Murasaki, but I couldn't resist having some fun with these lovely girls."

"You're here to kill our prisoner? What the hell is this about?"

"None of your damn business, obviously...but since you know why I'm here, I guess I gotta get rid of you lot too, huh?" the Stand sneered at all of us with a dark chuckle. "Damn shame too, those bitches were hot as hell, and the purple-haired one is feisty, kept fighting back even while my Stand ability was affecting her...say, you're Mitarashi Anko, right? As in Mitarashi Toaki's daughter?"

Anko stiffened at this, and her eye became shadowed. "What the hell would that have to do with this?"

"Oh, if I wasn't so giddy about killing you, our fun would have been poetic...seeing as how you came about in the first place. History repeats a lot, after all," the blob monster smirked. "I would have really enjoyed continuing certain trends, I mean they do say that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree-"

"FUCKING CREEP!"

My Jōnin sensei pulled out several kunai and threw them haphazardly at the creature, barely missing me by a hairwidth. The enemy let out a barking laugh before attempting to stab her with its tail, a strike which I easily blocked with my own Stand. Several lightspeed punches later, and the blob was once again stuck to the wall.

The smirk on my face faded when I heard it chuckling again. "What the actual fuck?!"

"Surprised? Your Stand is really really fast, I couldn't even track it all that well. And I can tell it's pretty strong too, way stronger than mine, kukuku…" the enemy nonchalantly removed itself from the wall and smirked at us. Then it immediately pulled back every piece of itself it had lost within the last hour. "My Stand is called 「Sweet Dreams」, and nothing you do will put a stop to it...you on the other hand…"

Sweet Dreams lashed out with its tail faster than I could react, striking Star Platinum's shoulder. I clutched the deep gash it had left as the enemy Stand let out a bout of mad laughter at my misfortune.

"Looks like I was right on the money! Anything that happens to your Stand also happens to you. I really lucked out, didn't I?!" the worm-like creature jumped up the wall, then began slithering towards a nearby vent. "Good luck getting any sleep tonight~"

I let out a seething hiss as the thing slithered into the vent to make its escape. "SONUDA BEETCH!"

Stand Name: 「Sweet Dreams」

User: Unknown

STATS:

Destructive Power: ?

Speed: ?

Range: ?

Durability/Persistence: ?

Precision: ?

Developmental Potential: ?

Abilities: Unknown

"Ok, so...what am I supposed to grab again?" Kiba asked nervously.

"The medical kit. It has all my supplies, the antiseptic, the bandages and gauze, stuff to get stitches ready, all of that," I let out a loud groan as Hinata helped stifle the bleeding from my shoulder. "Speaking of which, it's a good thing I'm shirtless for this."

"...Is that a Tattoo on your shoulder?" Hinata asked curiously.

"It's his family birthmark," Anko interjected before I could correct the girl. The woman glanced at me meekly from the corner of her eye. "Y-You look like you're in a lot of pain."

"I've had worse…" I lied.

This was one of the many times I wished I had Gold Experience instead.

"...Oi! You can't be using that blanket the whole time. Go and grab my coat."

"E-Eh?" Anko blinked at me in shock. "You want me to wear your…"

"It should fit, and I have some weapons stored in my pockets. It might be a good idea to wear clothes if we want to handle this," I winced and hissed as the bluenette began to clean my wound. "You said that you couldn't move, right? That it only happened when the Stand was touching you?"

"Y-Yeah, it touched me and…" my Jōnin sensei swallowed nervously as she went to grab my coat. "Please don't ask me more, I can't think about without-"

"Anko-sensei, we need to know exactly what that son of a bitch did if we want to fight him off effectively," my fist clenched as I thought about the enemy Stand...also because Hinata had begun stitching. "If we figure out his Stand ability, we can figure out a way to fight around it."

Anko bit her lip as she fiddled with the buttons on my coat. "I...just give me a few minutes, alright…"

"I won't push it," I said gently. "Whenever you feel like you can stomach it, please tell us."

"Hey, can we get an explanation now?" Kiba asked. "Y'know...the freaky talking slime monster and your purple ghost dude? You called them Stands, what are those?"

I let out a pained hiss as Hinata worked a needle into my wound. "Stands are unique abilities connected to one's soul, and they take on a visual appearance. They don't run on chakra, just the user's life energy and willpower," I cupped a hand to my chin in thought. "Each Stand gives its user a unique ability, and their appearance and power is usually based on the user's psyche."

"So, yours looks like a buff ghost that punches stuff," the dog-nin tilted his head as Star Platinum floated above me. "Sounds about right then...that look on your face...there's more you're not telling us, isn't there?"

"Yeah, there are a bunch of rules attached and everything, and I doubt I could explain them all at once...plus, some of them might not even apply," I let out an annoyed groan. "Like the one where Stands usually transfer any damage they receive to their users."

"So, we can't even go off of what you know about these things?"

"Everything else should still apply," I said worriedly. "Depending on the type, they all have a certain range they can't leave. Star Platinum can only move about two meters away from me without losing its speed and strength."

"Ok, let me just go over this again…" Kiba held his hands up and set us with a fierce expression. "You have a weird ghost thing created by your soul and powered by your life and stuff that you command, and it has a special ability. We are also fighting somebody else's slime monster thing created by their soul and powered by their life, and they have a special ability. Is that the gist of it?"

"Basically, yes," I let out a small sigh as the bluenette finished up the stitches. "Thanks a lot, this should heal up in a few hours."

"W-What do you-Oh, your Hamon…"

"It wouldn't have healed right without this though," I walked over to my bed and grabbed my shirt. "Right, Stands...so, mine would probably be used as a basis for everything you'd need to know. It's a close-range power type, meaning that it's really strong and fast, but if it goes past two meters it loses a lot of that."

"What of the enemy?" Shino asked quietly.

"Long-distance operation type," I said grimly. "Based on how he's hiding, it'd have to be like that. That means it has a much longer range than mine."

"I think I get what's up here," Kiba hummed thoughtfully. "I still don't get everything about this, but if you're saying that slimeball has a longer range, that means he'll try to set up ambushes and surprise attacks."

"And since the user can't be damaged by me indirectly, he doesn't have to worry about taking risks," I clicked my teeth angrily as I finished putting on my shirt. "With this bum shoulder, I'll need to take it easy for a bit too, so fighting back is gonna be a bitch."

"...How long have you had it?"

I turned to Hinata with a nervous look. "Since I was 6...I got it at the same time my parents…"

Her face fell slightly at this. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's fine, I'm not bothered about mentioning it, just about thinking about it."

"Have you been using it since then?" Shino leaned forward curiously.

"Oh, yeah...remember how you always tried to tag me with your Kikaichū during the first few years of the academy."

"W-What? I don't...Oh!" the bug-user shook his head. "Your Stand was-"

"Yeah, he does a lot of things without any command...like...keeping me from getting killed," I glanced to the side nervously. "I've had more than a few things like that happen."

"Good to know…" Kiba blinked as Kurenai emerged from the bathroom, wearing his shirt. "I feel like we should have brought a change of clothes."

"Honestly, we should have," the dark-haired woman said tiredly. "We could have been here for days waiting for them to bring the bounty...the bathroom is safe by the way. No vents, only a window."

"He could get in through a window. Even if he wasn't silent enough, it'd still be a moot point once he strikes," I turned to Anko with a concerned expression. "Are you-"

"I-I'm fine…" my Jōnin sensei let out a tired sigh that almost edged into being a sob. "So...when it first started touching me...well, I was asleep, but I could still move, because it was only grabbing through my clothes. When it actually touched my skin, I…" she swallowed a lump in her throat and screwed her eyes shut. "I couldn't move or, and it felt like something was pressing down on my chest. I was hearing fucked up noises, seeing freak shit, I...I thought I was gonna die."

"...Sleep paralysis."

"Hmm?" I turned to the Hyūga in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"When it touched me, I started having the same symptoms. I heard all this buzzing, and I thought I was looking at...well, it was some sort of illusionary monster…" Hinata shook her head and gave me a fierce stare. "I knew it was sleep paralysis because I've had it before."

"...You've had sleep paralysis?"

"When I was younger, alright," the bluenette twiddled her fingers nervously and furrowed her brows. "C-Could that be its ability? To cause sleep paralysis?"

I clicked my teeth and cupped a hand to my chin in thought. "I've read about it, but not much...still, it's not something I'd rule out," a snort escaped me as my lips turned up into a sneer. "Really makes his Stand's name more on the nose then."

"There's also the other issue," Shino motioned to the nearby corner.

I sighed as I faced Murasaki. Somehow the idiot had managed to sleep through...well, everything. I had to give the guy props for being able to sleep while sitting up and being bound in chains...Welp, time to wake him up.

"Oi! Murasaki! Get your ass up!" I kicked the man's leg as gently as I could.

Eiki let out a tired groan as he opened his eyes. "Ugh...what time is it?"

"It's still the middle of the night, and we're under attack."

The prisoner let out a snort. "Let me guess, my village took exception to you demanding a bounty?" Eiki chuckled darkly as he leaned back. "They were probably gonna kill me right in front of you anyway so that you wouldn't have gotten it. Now they'll just get rid of you too-"

"They're not Iwa nin," I sent the criminal a dark glare. "Why the hell would a talking slime monster want to kill you?"

Murasaki stared at us for a full minute with his trademark blank expression, then he went ghost pale and began hyperventilating. "I-It's here?! Oh kami, nonononono! You have to get me out of here, you…" the man quickly curled up into a ball on the floor. "He's really going to kill me...I'm gonna die…"

"Uh, hello! What the hell is going on, Murasaki?"

He swallowed a lump in his throat before craning his head to look at us. "I...I didn't do it…"

"Do what?" I asked anxiously.

"The women, I didn't do anything to them, I was framed…" Murasaki let out a mad chuckle at our incredulous looks. "I know, I know, sounds so cliche and shit, and it would have made more sense if I went on about it from the start."

"How were you framed?"

The man gave us a shocked expression. "Y-You...you believe me?"

"We just got attacked by a talking slime monster who said he wanted to off you," Kiba growled angrily. "If you have anything to say, fucking say it!"

"Alright, Alright!" Eiki sat up shakily. "I...I was just walking around one night a few months ago, to clear my head, and then I heard this scream from one of my neighbors. I...I went to check and they were dead, and this ugly white slime thing was there," he shivered slightly as he continued. "It...it said something, I can't really remember, but then it took off, and the next thing I know I'm being pinned to the floor by some of my friends and cuffed."

"And then? You were brought to trial, convicted...what happened?" I asked.

"I got out. I escaped, no idea how, but I did it. I hid around in the Land of Fire for a bit before some of your ninja figured me out and captured me," the man furrowed his brows in confusion. "I still have no idea why a slime monster would do all that, and I don't get why it wants to kill me."

"The slime monster is actually a Stand, which is essentially one's soul weaponized," Star Platinum floated next to me. "This one is mine, and it looks a lot different. There's a bunch of things I can't go over, but the gist of it is that there's a person commanding that slime monster."

"It's...their soul?" Eiki looked between my Stand and I in awe. "So, a guy was using some weird soul power to kill people?"

"That's the essence of it, yeah," I cupped a hand to my chin in thought. "My guess is that he wasn't worried you knew what was really going on until he heard you were captured by Konoha. He must have assumed we got a Yamanaka to look into your mind."

"That's...ridiculous! I was just kept in a maximum security place with one or two visits every other week," a sour look spread across the man's face. "There was this guy in the next cell over, really annoying, talking about a blonde with wood and punching."

I snorted at this before shaking my head. "If our enemy had just waited, you would have been executed and we'd have been screwed out of a bounty. As it is now, he's screwed himself over by showing up," I turned to stare at a nearby vent. "I got through an entire ninja academy by bullshitting my way through it, and I can get through this the exact same way."

"Bullshitting? Are you saying you were just fucking around?!" Kiba cried out.

"Bullshitting is an art form, Inuzuka," I made a flourish with my hands. "And if the Joushuyas...no, the Joesars have anything going for them, it's the power of bullshit!"

"J-Jōsutā? The hell is that?"

"My mom's family...t-they're westerners."

"Ah, that explains a bit...ok, so what else is there?"

"We've figured out the enemy's power, and their attack strategy," Shino tilted his head thoughtfully. "I'm worried about the slime itself. If it was able to...violate our comrades in their sleep, it must have a physical presence. It could be some poisonous substance."

"It's not," Anko said flatly.

"...You know what it is?"

"It was pretty familiar. The texture, the color...the taste," the purple-haired woman cringed as she turned to me. "C-Could a Stand attach itself to an object?"

"If the way it manifests requires it to do so, then yeah," I scratched the back of my head nervously. "I don't know what that has to do with-"

"Semen."

"...What?!"

"The Stand, it's made out of Semen," Anko's nose curled up in disgust. "Probably the user's own. That just...just makes things worse…"

"Anko, it's alright," Kurenai said gently. "He...he didn't-"

"No, but the way he spoke about my mom," my Jōnin sensei clenched her fists. "I'm gonna wring that bastard's throat."

"Y-You're saying that the t-thing that attacked me…" Hinata looked at her wrist nervously. "EEP! I feel like I'm gonna puke!"

"I mean...it's definitely not pleasant, I guess," I deadpanned.

"Hey! Mind getting me out of these chains?" Eiki flinched when we all set him with nervous stares. "Listen, I know how everything started out, but I want to help. This guy, he hurt a lot of women, some of them were my friends, and he even killed a few. I have to be there to bring him down."

Kiba's mouth turned into a snarl. "How do we know you're not the use-"

"He isn't," I said flatly.

"How do you know that?!"

"Because I would have sensed it. Stand Users can sense other Stand Users," I walked over to the man and glanced at the chains curiously. "I think I can handle these...just hold still for a bit."

"W-Wait, what are you gonna-"

"ORAORAORAORAORAORA!"

Kiba and Akamaru leaned out the door slightly with nervous looks, eyes darting up and down the hallway as they searched for danger. The little dog's ears sagged as he let out a small whimper, prompting the inuzuka to look down to him.

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Arf! Arf!"

"Akamaru," I cut in gently. "Bad people often like doing bad things to animals. Are you really sure you wanna be out in the open like that?"

"Arf! Arf!"

"I'm sorry, can you all understand dogs?" Eiki asked in shock.

"No, just Kiba, but Akamaru can understand everybody else," Kurenai tilted her head at Kiba with a concerned expression. "Do you really think this'll work?"

"Believe it or not, we know what Semen smells like-and no, it's not why you think. We have to breed the ninken somehow," the Inuzuka sighed at our shrugs. "Plus, if it's moving around like a living thing, it'll sound like some weird slime snake or something."

"Alright, just be careful."

"We don't plan on biting off more than we can chew, Kurenai-sensei," Kiba scowled as he leaned forward. "Alright, let's go!"

"ARF!"

Both of them jumped out the door to our room, the dog-nin rolling across the floor to gain distance while his partner skid to a stop next to him. Kiba jumped back a few feet and crouched into a low position, head turning at any sound he registered. In our room, I prepared the glass of water I needed to sense our surroundings.

"So, what do you have?" Kurenai asked quietly.

"Just Kiba and Akamaru...oh, and Ichiko and her grandparents," I frowned as I felt another shape moving before it faded. "I...I'm having trouble sensing it. I've wondered how Hamon interacts with Stands, but if this thing is moving…"

"It's not...technically alive, is it?" Anko asked nervously.

"Well, it's made out of...you know…" Eiki clutched his shoulders and shivered. "So it might be sort of alive. If you're supposed to be sensing a living thing though, it might not always tip your...weird sun sensory power...you Konoha guys have really bizarre techniques."

"Just his clan, actually," my Jōnin sensei deadpanned.

"ARF! ARF! ARF!"

"That's the all clear signal," Kurenai said. "Come on, let's go!"

Kurenai hesitantly opened the door to our room and signalled us to cling to the wall as we walked out. Further down the hallway, I saw Kiba and Akamaru crouching low to the floor, the dog-nin holding a finger to his lips while his partner covered his ears.

"Kiba! What's the situation?!" Kurenai hissed.

"Those old bastards are up, probably from...well, Anko-sensei screamed earlier, and those chains didn't exactly break quietly," the Inuzuka shied away from my Jōnin sensei's deranged glare. "W-What?!"

"Oh, I'm sorry for not being quieter while I was being raped!"

"Anko, calm down," Kurenai said quietly. "This isn't the time for this."

The purple-haired woman let out a tired sigh. "Alright, alright...I'm sorry Inuzuka."

"Kami, you're using our names too…"

I flinched as a particular noise further away drew my attention. "Ichiko is awake."

"Really? How did you know?"

"I heard noise coming from the broom closet," I said grimly.

"...Ya think we could use the old bastards as distractions for the guy?" Kiba asked seriously.

I stared at him blankly for several seconds before tilting my head. "We'd have to gag them first, otherwise he'd be too annoyed to kill them."

"Good point…"

"Can we not?" the dark-haired woman growled. "We need to come up with a plan to fight off the user."

"I have one...we need to get the Iwa nin over for it though," I clicked my teeth at their shocked expressions. "Yeah, I get it, it sounds crazy...but I think I have something figured out."

"Ok, so how do we get to the Iwa nin?"

"Shadow clones," I held a finger up and cocked my head to the side. "If we do convince them to come over, we'll know because we used shadow clones. We can also make extras as bait for the Stand User."

"How many can you make?"

"...About 3, if I really push it. But that's only if I don't use any jutsu beforehand, then it's just 2."

"I can make about 5, Anko can pull out six...Ugh, Hinata," Kurenai turned to the bluenette with an exasperated expression. "How many can you make?"

"I-I don't know the Kage Bunshin!"

Kurenai and I both looked at her with expressions that said 'really?', causing her to shrink in on herself further and twiddle her fingers. Finally, after several seconds of stuttering nervously, she held up a single finger.

"Alright, that's good enough."

"I...how does your kunoichi know the Kage Bunshin?" Anko asked exasperatedly.

"I'll tell you later, now let's-"

"Oi! You shitty shinobi, what the hell is going on here?!" the old hag cried out from the lobby.

"Son of a...great, we have to deal with this then," Kurenai motioned for the group to follow. The dark-haired woman entered the lobby with the best 'customer-service smile' she could muster. "I'm very sorry, we're just having a little problem-"

"We don't give a damn!" the ugly bastard growled beside his wife. "You know what, screw it! You have 10 minutes to get your shit together and get out!"

"Ojiisan, Obaasan, what's going on?"

"Get out of here you useless gaki!" the hag cried out to his granddaughter. "Better yet, get to cleaning whatever stench they'll be leaving behind! Don't even think about going back to sleep!"

"H-Hai, Obaasan…" the girl said dejectedly.

The old man's mouth turned into a wild snarl, foam forming at the sides of his mouth. "If you freaks don't get out in the next five minutes, I'll-"

*SHINK*

I blinked in shock as the man's head fell from his shoulders and rolled onto the floor, blood spraying out from his neck stump. Behind him, the old woman hadn't even reacted to her husband's decapitation. When her head fell apart into diced little bits, I realized exactly why.

"Agh! Shit! He's here now?!" Kiba cried out.

"Over there, on the ceiling corner," I pointed.

Leering down at us from there was what looked like a lizard or salamander made of white slime. The enemy Stand let out a wild chuckle as we glared at it, and crawled along the wall to circle around us.

ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ

"Like it? I figured you'd try to use the Inuzuka and his ninken to ferret me out, so I added legs. You would have thought it was just a rat or something, kukuku…"

"You bastard. How-"

"Oh, don't act like saints! I heard you going on about using them as distractions, it wouldn't have been any better...can't disagree with you about them deserving it though. This cute little thing on the other hand…" the Stand jumped forward with its new limbs outstretched. The creature landed on poor Ichiko and coiled around her, threatening to strangle her to death with its tail. "If you hand over Murasaki right now, I might let this one live, kukuku!"

"You son of a bitch!" I cried out. "She's just a civilian, and she's not like her shitty grandparents! Leave her out of this!"

"Oh, I know she ain't a shitty person! I've been listening in for a while now~" the slime monster coiled around like an ugly snake before chuckling. "So make the choice, Konoha!"

"You said you were gonna kill us anyway!" Shino growled. "What difference does it make?!"

"The difference is that one less innocent life is snuffed out if you do as I asked. You have my word, I'll kill your asses all I want, but I'll leave this cute little thing alone," the creature stroked the girl's cheek with its slimy tail. "Go on then, make the right choice…"

"Dammit!" I growled. "I didn't think it would have to come to this…"

←To Be Continued

Alrighty then, donezo! If you noticed the change in rating (from T to M) I think it should be pretty obvious why. Let me also address a few things...

*Stands can actually go outside their effective range, as seen in the beginning of Stardust Crusaders when Star Platinum was grabbing things from way outside Jotaro's cell. Shuckmeister actually debunked the fallacy of Araki forgetting that in one of his videos. The gist is that Stands can leave their effective ranges, but they loose a lot of their physical abilities as well as their special power weakening slightly (I. E, Star Platinum or The World can leave 2 meters, but if they try to stop time it'll go for about a fraction of a normal stop).

Another thing I feel is going to be a problem is the 'C' in Stand Stats. 'C' is always 'comparable to a human', so in stands like Hierophant or Chariot they roughly have the same physical strength as their user's self. But the problem with making Jojo crossovers with series like Naruto, Bleach, or even RWBY, is that even the closest thing to an average human in those casts would still be ridiculously stronger than a majority of humans in the real world, and that's not taking into account that most Stand Users are always buff macho guys in homoerotic poses. So a Stand with a C in it's speed/precision/destructive power in this fic is definitely going to be strong, enough so that I'd be personally worried about people going 'ayy, that's a C in stat, it can't do that!'.

Alright then, let's get down to the reviews. (Note, I won't address the ones asking 'where are you?' cause I'm right here XP)

dannyrockon122: No, that's not planned at this point in time.

timelesstrix00: Time Stop will increase in length. Just for a comparison, Joushirou's current max is 5 seconds, and he'll be able to increase it through training since humans in Naruto have stronger constitutions than in Jojo.

Gen3sian: Don't worry, it's just Pearl Jam.

Draegoon: Like I've said before, Tokyo Ghoul is up there as one of my favorites, so there'll be one or two references to it. I'll leave the actual series proper to my main fix-fic though. Naruto isn't going to get a Stand, but I do have a few of the main characters in mind for them...

RysingEmbers: Hope I delivered :D

RobinRuken: Araki only used that once...*poses dramatically* and so will I!

coldblue2015: Thank you again for your review, I always love seeing you in there. Teuchi, obviously, has another version of Pearl Jam as his Stand, and his past as a civilian is pretty set. Jojo's found scrolls and supplies for training Hamon, but he'll have to find an oily cliff to climb all on his own. Gato...Gato is just gonna be the same fat turd in canon, and I'm still debating on whether Zabuza should die or not, to give Haku a more tragic backstory than he already has. As a guy who regularly tortures his first OC, and often injures his own self-insert, you know I'm a sucker for making my characters suffer Xp.

Guest: Oh...I haven't really watched Boruto all that much. That time travel just sounds like another Asspull...I might use a Stand that does it in a later chapter though *shrugs*

dova117: I'm glad you enjoyed it, and thanks for the review/follow :)

Guest: So many songs and bands! So many to pick from...I have a list already that Imma add these to. I'll post it on my profile later, but 'Get Lucky', 'Rocket Man', 'Blue/Eiffel 65', and 'Back in Black' are definitely in.

GlassedGamer: Perfect guess too. I know how to be vague about things based on my TG fic, but the fact that you pinned it long before I even put it in is impressive.

princess peach (Guest): Joushirou, like Jotaro, is a power bottom. I mean, that's how Jotaro beat DIO in the first place, and same with Joseph and Whammu, so its not really on the nose.

Aiden Ho: And thank you for favoriting, following, and reviewing. I really do appreciate it.

xxANIES: No publishing schedule, I just sorta...summon up all the willpower I can to not procrastinate for a few hour of the day, and I follow the layout I made during that time.

rileyhopskinsholt: No, this is Patrick.

MagmaMan999: No! This. is. Patrick.

stixpix: You mean like it would be, in art form...3.5 pages? Maybe...7 pages?

The Shadow 750: Chapter 10 when?

manny0101: Hehe, yeah, totally wouldn't do that...*shuffles nervously as he hides his next Xover plans* wouldn't even dream about doing it, lol.

Hazem Rekhaies: ...yes?

thetyrant67: Yeah, about like 90% of the ones already in are gonna be deconstructed/parodied/subverted...somebody gimme a TV Tropes page already T-T.

Thank you all for the followings and reviews. For everybody interested, please leave any thoughts, questions, and constructive criticism in your reviews.