More Than Words

RokuNami Week 2019

August 31: Words Unspoken

I may have (read: definitely) butchered the French in this piece. Google Translate was my only resource.

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He knew the ballroom first and foremost as a battleground. Many a Heartless have been defeated here by both himself and Sora. Before the curse had been broken, this large, majestic room had been like every other in the castle: dusty, desolate, and a shell of its former glory.

This was the first time Roxas was seeing the ballroom as it was meant to be. Men in their tailored coats, ladies in their elegant gowns, all swaying together in to the music beneath the light of the chandelier and painted dome ceiling. He was not about to deny that it utterly took his breath away.

Roxas looked around, searching for Naminé. He expected her to be difficult to find in this crowd, but as it turned out, it wasn't. Dressed in a gown of cloth-of-silver, blonde hair pulled up in a low bun, she was not dancing, but rather, watching the dancing from where she stood half-hidden by a pillar. From a distance, Roxas could see a very familiar yearning in her eyes. The one she had when she clearly wanted to be a part of something, but unsure if she would be welcome.

In a way, seeing that look again was painful. Roxas thought she finally overcame those kinds of feelings.

Someone slipped into the ballroom and paused at his shoulder. "What are you waiting for, mon ami?" The accent was unmistakable. "The mademoiselle clearly wishes to dance, and you clearly wish to dance with her. What's stopping you?"

Roxas glanced at Lumière, who, like the other castle staff, was also dressed for the occasion. It had, ultimately, been the insistence of the maître d' that Naminé was attending the ball at all. If she had it her way, she would still be cloistered in the library searching for the Book of Prophecies.

It was also extremely annoying that the former walking, talking candelabra had picked up on the nature of his relationship with Naminé within five minutes of meeting them.

"I don't know how to."

Lumière's smile was polite, but it did the speaking for him. I can see right through you. "I've watched you spar with the prince, Monsieur. If you can fight, you can dance." His next bit of advice was a little kinder. "She's shy, that one, not like our Belle at all. She won't dance until somebody asks her to."

You think I don't know that? Roxas thought irritably.

"Well, the decision is yours in the end. Please enjoy the rest of the evening, regardless."

"Thank you."

"Of course. Any friend of Sora's is a friend of ours."

With that Lumière wandered off to chase after a maid that walked by. Without the Frenchman to distract him though, Roxas could only find himself drawn to watching Naminé again.

She noticed. Turning her head slightly to the side, she caught his eye. He thought he saw something like expectation there, but then she blushed and looked away again.

Well… Credit had to be given where it's due. Roxas hasn't worn so much black since the day he, Axel, and Xion gleefully burned their Organization coats atop the clocktower, but if Naminé liked the look of him in the black, gold-trimmed ensemble Flora, Fauna, and Merrywhether conjured for him then clearly it wasn't so bad.

Roxas shifted his gaze back to the dancers. If you can fight, you can dance. He remembered hearing Aqua telling Kairi about how her childhood ballet lessons, of all things, proved to be an assist during her training. What was it that she said? Something about… timing and footwork. And rhythm.

He continued to watch the dancers. If I can fight, I can dance. He thought about Naminé. Still an apprentice keyblade wielder, but always doing her best to catch up.

White flickered in the corner of his eye. It appeared Naminé had grown tired of watching. Or perhaps - Roxas's heart skipped a beat - she had grown tired of waiting.

The guests who were not dancing stood clustered by the walls, but Naminé managed to evade them all with ease. She was not heading to the huge double doors leading to the rest of the castle, but the glass doors on the opposite side of the room.

Roxas didn't need to think. He followed her onto the empty balcony was empty. Compared to the ballroom, the outside was sharply cold.

Naminé spun around, the bottom of her skits flaring briefly around her. "Roxas," she said, "Why aren't you…"

"Enjoying the party?" he finished. "You really think I would rather spend an evening with a bunch of strangers than with you?"

That got a little smile from her. "Neither of us are really the kind of people for this kind of thing are we?" she agreed. "I just hope Lumière won't notice us missing. I don't want him to think we aren't having fun."

Roxas shrugged. The maître d' probably saw and understood more than his careless, casanova demeanor would suggest. "If he does, he'll probably think we snuck away for some privacy."

Naminé raised an eyebrow. "Are we?"

He blinked. Lumière may have a tendency to stick his nose where it didn't belong, but he was right about one thing if nothing else. Taking a deep breath and praying what he was about to say didn't come out stupid, Roxas extended a hand. "Would you like to dance?"

She startled, eyes wide. Then she let out a soft giggle. "I would like that very much."

He shouldn't. He really shouldn't. But the moment she took his proffered hand, Roxas let himself get swept up in the illusion of this fairytale. A few minutes worth of observation did not make one a dancer, but the simple box step pattern he was able to lead her through was enough. Just being this close to her was enough.

This evening. This world. The moment he stepped foot on the bridge something - a memory - have been nagging at him at the back of his mind.

If I had a heart, you think I could love somebody?

He knew the answer to that question now because of the girl in his arms. He wanted to tell her. But how?

"Naminé?"

"Yes?"

"I…" Love you. Two words. Two very simple words, but his tongue felt clumsy and useless, so what he said was: "I'm glad you're here."

He immediately wanted to kick himself.

With a flutter of blonde lashes, Naminé closed her eyes and laid her head on his shoulder, softly smiling like she knew what he had been about to say. "I am too."

She may already know, but he wanted to say it out loud, to give these unspoken feelings between them form. One day he will, Roxas promised a wordless sigh. One day, he definitely will.

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Title comes from the theme song for Code Geass: Akito the Exiled, "More Than Words" by Maaya Sakamoto.