A/N: Happy Holidays! So, I was going to make this multiple chapters and post one each starting on Christmas Day, but I realized that each one would be short and hated that so, I'm making this a one-shot. The timeline follows the twelve days of Christmas, starting with Christmas morning and ending with the eve before Epiphany (December 25th to January 5th). If you want to see the ornaments I describe head to my profile for the link, instructions will be there like all the other stories I have boards for.

12 Nights of Christmas

Dear Bella,

I know it's ludicrous to expect you may find it in your heart to forgive me after all I've put you through, but I must try. It's been over a year and you doubtless have no desire to see my face, so I write to you instead. I understand words won't mean as much on paper as they would in person, but here it goes.

First, I wish to express how sorry I am for your loss. Charlie was a great man and I'm sure you miss him something awful. The fault lies nowhere other than at the feet of me and my family. Had we still been there, we could have saved him and for that, I will forever hate myself. Victoria should have been dealt with when we killed her mate. I am beyond doubt, so apologetic.

Also, I long to express how remorseful I am for my conduct the night of your birthday, which was the cause of our leaving and thus, your loss. I should have apologized that evening, but my actions were deplorable, and they mortified me.

So much so, that I left the family and have been wandering North America by myself ever since. Well, not altogether alone. There are two companions with me, my closest friends, only because they refuse to leave when I order them to.

Know that I will accept if you never wish to speak to me again, but I hope that I can at least earn forgiveness through my actions. I get why you wouldn't desire to celebrate the season, but please allow me to bring your holiday some cheer. Please accept this token of apology. Merry Christmas.

Yours,

An Apologetic Man

P.S.—"Don't lose hope. For when the sun goes down, the stars come out." -unknown

Bella had to read the letter twice to believe it was real. The ornament nestled in newspaper and tucked underneath the folded note was stunning. A flawlessly rendered sunset over a wintry landscape of pine trees.

The raised paint on the glass bulb told her it wasn't mass manufactured either. Whoever gave her this painted it themselves. They were quite the artist too.

They'd even set her up a tree to hang it on. Dark green foliage and sturdy branches bore battery-operated candles, tinsel, and old-fashioned glass bulb garland. Tucked between the limbs were decorations used between the late 1800s to 1920s. Soft ones formed from cotton batting. Dresden ornaments constructed from pressed cardboard. As well as tin trinkets, oranges (like honest to goodness peel and eat oranges), and beautifully crafted traditional glass bulbs. Every one of them looked vintage, old, worn. Well-loved.

It might have impressed Bella if whoever set everything up hadn't thought it was alright to break into her little one-bedroom apartment without so much as a by your leave. That pissed her off. She could name two people who would think it was okay and both were vampires. Typical Edward or Alice.

Given the begging for forgiveness, it was clear this criminal act was her ex's, though Alice could have helped. She was his favorite family member and she tended to cater to his whims, they all did.

Well, if Edward assumed this would get him back into her good graces, he had another thing coming. She was over him. Had been for a while. Dating Jake for a month was the beginning, but then Victoria murdered her father, Harry Clearwater died from a heart attack due to the shock, and apathy shifted to hate. She loathed Edward Cullen with every fiber of her being.

At first, she'd blamed herself, even the pack. It was her Victoria was after, but the pack's sole duty was to protect humans from vampires and they failed. Yet, as days turned to weeks, weeks to months, Bella realized the fault lay on the Cullens; as the letter even said. In particular, on Edward.

Why couldn't he have left her alone? She would have gotten over her curiosity at some point if he'd stayed in Alaska, but no, he had to come back, had to prove how strong he was by being around his singer without killing her.

Perhaps if they'd all went when he did he could have battled the lure of her blood, remained gone, and she never would have fallen for him so hard; to the detriment of herself and those she loved. She wasn't his mate, that was for damn sure, or he wouldn't have been able to leave without looking back as he had.

Bella was nothing more than a game, a challenge; when he grew bored, he dumped her like trash and walked away without a scratch. He left her to deal with the aftermath. She hated how they'd all disappeared without a word, though she wasn't mad at Jasper. How could she be?

He was the one that tried to warn them to kill Victoria when they had the chance, that she could be an issue later. Did they listen? Nope. Edward swore she wouldn't be a threat, and no one bet against Edward, not even the allegedly all-seeing pixie bitch.

Was that how whoever wrote the letter had learned about Charlie? Known exactly how he'd died? Alice saw it and told them? No one but Bella, the pack, and Victoria knew the vampiress snapped his neck nine months ago while he was out hunting the wolves. The town and her mother were all told the wolves he hunted attacked him and broke his neck falling down a ravine trying to get away. The pack ripped her to pieces right after, but it wasn't in time to save Bella's father.

That Alice might have seen what was coming and didn't call to warn her made Bella hate the Cullens even more. Guess she wasn't part of the family no matter how many times they said it. How many other humans had they done that to? Allowed into their family only to dump them like so much garbage once that human loved them?

Sighing, Bella ran a finger over the soft needles of the pine. No use continuing to dwell on unchangeable things. She'd done that for too long. She was finished with it. Charlie died and nothing could fix it. Bella had to move on with her life. She hadn't thrown herself into graduating high school and getting into a good nursing school for nothing. She needed to do more with her life than grieve.

So there she was, in Boston at Northeastern University. Oddly enough, she'd missed the cold, missed having seasons. She loved the heat, having lived in the south for most of her life, but living in the Pacific Northwest even for such a short time changed things. But she didn't want to go back west, so the northeast it was.

With her mom and Phil in Europe on vacation, Bella planned to spend Christmas alone. After brunch, she would open the gifts sent to her by her mom, the pack, and Billy. Then she would relax in her armchair by the fire with a book and a few glasses of eggnog. Instead, she'd woken to find her home broken into by some jackass playing Santa.

Bella debated just throwing the box and letter in the trash and dismantling the tree, let that be a message to Edward and his selfishness, but she couldn't seem to bring herself to destroy such beautiful things. No, she'd keep the fir up but leave him a note telling him to go fuck himself. In the nicest way possible of course.

Decided, she tossed the message aside and seized another present. Food could wait she supposed. She would not let Edward Cullen ruin her first Christmas alone, the first Christmas without her father.

Dear Bella,

Happy Boxing Day

I'm sorry to have upset you so much. Please don't hold on to your anger. I know how damaging that can be. If you forgive for no other reason, at least do it for yourself. Let go of the burden of hate. I can deal with your harsh words; I can't handle you allowing hate to fester. It can become all-consuming.

I realize you might not care, but maybe I can tell you a little about my travels? I would love to take you with me to see the same places I have someday. I think you'd enjoy it as much as I did. I started in Oregon. The coastline is much the same as what you'd find in Washington, so there wasn't much to impress me.

I didn't want to go too far south, personal reasons, so I veered east from there. I visited many historical sites. Those were informative and so fascinating. Yellowstone provided excellent hunting and seeing Old Faithful at night should be a bucket list item for you.

As we wandered, my companions remained silent mostly, following along wherever I went. I'm sure they feared for my mental health. I admit I wasn't in a good place in the beginning. It pissed me off, my lack of control. Then I realized how much I missed you. Not the family, you. So, I made my way back to Forks.

I arrived too late, I'm afraid. Charlie was already gone, and you'd moved back to Florida. In my shame at having caused the death of your father, I ran…

What was it about that idiot that made him such a glutton for punishment? Bella crumpled the second letter, refusing to read it all the way through. What did she care that he came back for her? As he'd said, it was too late. Now she knew how he'd learned about Charlie though. It didn't make her feel any better that the family may not know her father died.

The ornament was pretty, but so was the first one.

Another hand-painted glass bauble lay snug in newspaper under the note. This one depicted a bright red cardinal perched on a snow-covered branch full of berries of some sort. The background was the palest shade of blue with little flakes of snow falling. Beautiful. Too bad the giver was a prick.

Bella left another reply, knowing he'd get it since he didn't seem to want to take the hint.

Dear Bella… Blah blah blah blah. Ugh, why would this man not leave her be?

The ornament this time was more muted than the other two. Fall leaves still on the trees, a cover of snow on the ground, and a river flowing right down the middle of it all. The details were exquisite. Bella hadn't known Edward could paint, but what else would be new? He could write songs, play the piano, run the fastest, looked gorgeous. He was perfection personified, so why wouldn't he be able to do this as well?

Too bad he was also controlling, narcissistic, and a complete dick. Oh well, another wad of paper for the bin, another beautiful bulb to hang because she couldn't bear to trash it. Christmas had come and gone, she could take the tree down now, but it smelled so good and was so pretty and she honestly didn't feel like it yet. It was the only festive decoration in her apartment.

That could be her mistake though. Leaving it up might be all the encouragement he needed to keep going. Bella hated not knowing what to do, but it wasn't like he was doing her harm, Edward was just being annoying beyond reason. Nothing new there. She could live with that until the festive season was over.

Day four came with yet another letter detailing his travels. She didn't care. This time the ornament was a snowy little town, smoke rising from the chimneys. She could almost picture it, practically feel the snow crunching beneath her feet.

Day five, she nearly missed it. She was about to throw the note away after skimming it like she'd done the others, but something caught her attention. A phrase. Something someone once said to her, words she hadn't ever believed. 'You're worth it'.

Now, Edward could know about it, he read minds after all, but Bella was sure he'd never say those words to her, ever. He'd have to mean them to say them and Bella knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that he never would. But there was one other person who would remember them and mean them. Jasper.

Her mind flashed back to the day he'd said them, the sincerity in his voice, the truth in his eyes. It was one of the few times he'd ever spoken to her and the only occasion he'd ever been alone with her. Bella hadn't believed him then, still didn't, but it had always stuck with her. It was the first time anyone had made her feel positive about herself.

Another night entered into focus in her mind, her birthday party. The feral way he tried to get to her, gone mere seconds later, replaced by a look of utter devastation as he realized what he'd done, and she sat bleeding on the floor. Bella wasn't sure if anyone else noticed it, but Jasper let them take him out of the room. In truth, if he'd wanted to get to her no one would have been able to stop him. Not even Emmett.

It gave a whole new meaning to those letters if they were from Jasper and not Edward. She hadn't taken her trash out yet; thank fuck she hadn't burned them like she'd first thought to. Rushing to the kitchen, she dumped her trash on the floor and began digging for the ones she'd thrown away.

She sifted through the detritus, setting each one aside as she located it. A couple were a little wet, but there was nothing gross or gooey on any of them. Vowing to clean-up later, Bella's stockinged feet silently carried her to her chair where she carefully uncrumpled each one and read them word by word.

If it weren't for the fifth one, she would believe one-hundred percent it was Edward writing them. But now? Now she could see it between the lines. The inference to her party and the fact he called James Victoria's mate in the first letter. The whole reason they didn't listen to Jasper was Edward swore she wasn't James' mate. Only Jasper thought he was wrong.

The mention that he avoided going south in the second letter was also telling. She was only told the bare bones of his past, but it was enough to explain why he'd steered clear of that area. She knew a Mexican vampire named Maria turned him during the Civil War to fight for territory for her in Mexico.

At least that's what Edward explained to her. He never wanted her too close to Jasper, fearing a loss of control on the other vampire's part. Funny how it had been Edward's inability to handle her spilled blood the night she turned eighteen that ruined it all, not Jasper's. He was simply reacting to the blood lust permeating the room and his gift.

The two companions referenced could be the couple that saved him from such a monster. Alice would be the only one to leave the family with Edward, and even that was being generous.

Plus, he told her happy Boxing Day. Only European countries observed that. She could attribute it to Carlisle, but Jasper was of German descent according to Alice. It was information Bella learned as she sought to get to know more about the coven. She had to ask Alice about Jasper because anytime Bella attempted to approach the quiet man, Edward appeared and distracted her. The ass.

The third letter was more banal, less there to clue her into who the writer was, the same with the fourth. It was the fifth that supported her reasoning. She could not see Edward telling her that. Not after the way he left her in the woods, after the words he'd said.

Then look at the ornaments themselves. They were plain as most went. Ordinary scenes. The new one was a clear ornament with only a barn owl in winter plumage perched on a limb. The bulbs themselves weren't extravagant either, more like the ones you'd find at a craft store.

Edward, wanting forgiveness, would commit to a grand gesture of some type. He'd make them blown glass or some shit and if he painted them himself, he'd sign them. And there was no way in hell he wouldn't put his name on the letters now she thought about. But all of them simply said 'An Apologetic Man'.

How could she not have seen it before? Was she so bitter that she would refuse to even consider another option to Edward? And Jasper, how did he feel at her rejection? She'd never blamed him, not once. Everyone else, including herself? Yes. Never him.

She had to see him, had to apologize and tell him she accepted his, but how? He came in after she'd gone to bed and was so silent, she didn't even know he'd come until the next morning. Maybe if she slept on the couch?

The next few nights, that was exactly what Bella did, but try as she might, she couldn't catch Jasper in the act. The later it got, the more tired she became, and she'd fall asleep before he arrived. Every morning, she'd wake, back in her bed with the covers stretched over her and another letter and ornament.

The sixth one was red with a delicately painted Christmas tree front and center surrounded by other trees in a forest. Number seven was a blue bulb with a snow family and a letter wishing her good things in the new year. Eight was a frosted bulb that bore Santa's face, his cheeks a rosy pink, eyes twinkling, his beard painted with so many brush strokes it looked real.

Frustrated, Bella decided to leave a letter of her own, apologizing for her attitude and asking him to stop coming only while she slept so they could speak face to face. It didn't work, though. In its place was letter nine and another boxed ornament, blue with a buckskin horse standing with its back to the wind in the snow with a red barn behind it.

She learned a little bit about him this time though, now that he knew she recognized who he was. The horse's name was Buck, a family horse from when he was a youth. The incident happened when he was thirteen or fourteen during one of those rare snowfalls in Texas, which was what made it memorable enough to follow him into immortality.

Letter ten joked how he couldn't resist making her depiction of Edward purchasing blown glass bulbs come true. Underneath was a hand-blown glass ornament, painted with another snowy theme of pine trees, the sky a dark starry blue. It made her laugh heartily.

Letter eleven was the first time he named his companions and how exasperated they were at him. Peter and Charlotte Whitlock were the ones to save him from Maria. He told her about his past, the things he and they had suffered, though she doubted he told her everything. Bella cried that night.

It was also the first time he'd put people in his painting. A turquoise blue bulb with two little boys playing in the snow, a house in the background. Jasper's wish for a childhood with Peter he'd never had, brothers in heart if not in blood.

Bella dreaded the next morning. It hadn't taken her long to understand what Jasper was doing. The years he spent growing up they would have celebrated the Twelve Days of Christmas. In his family, they likely exchanged small, handmade gifts each evening after supper. There would be no more notes or ornaments waiting for her in the morning after January fifth.

That daybreak, Bella found the letter confirming her suspicions. She didn't want it to end. As she hung the dark blue bulb depicting the three wise men following the star to Bethlehem in silhouette, tears streamed down her cheeks. She refused to read the entire letter, not ready yet to say goodbye.

She went about her day, preparing for her return to class after the weekend. She lost herself in finishing assignments due, cleaning, shopping for groceries, anything to occupy her mind. That night, she lay on the couch with the comforter from her bed and watched the flames in her fireplace dance and spark.

She must have fallen asleep because next she knew she was jolting awake, unsure what had disturbed her slumber. Blurry visioned, she rubbed the sleep from her eyes and tried to focus. It was dark, save for the candles on the dying tree. Her fire had gone out hours ago. She blinked, attempting to adjust to the darkness. There, beside the tree in the dark, was that a person?

She didn't have to wait long to find out. The figure shifted, came towards her, the meager light from the tree casting his face in shadow. Yet, she knew that pale form, recognized those blond locks that fell to his shoulders. "Jasper?"

"I told myself to just go, that I had done what I'd come for, but…" He shifted again, came to kneel in front of her, one knee on the floor, the other raised as a perch for his arm. Bella's eyes scanned his familiar face, realizing how much she'd truly missed him. "That wouldn't be very gentlemanly of me, or so Char said."

Bella sat up, shuffled forward to the edge of the cushion. "Why now? Why not after I figured you out? All I asked you for was to come see me, to let me talk to you face to face."

"I know, Darlin', but I couldn't find the courage. It was easier to remain on the outskirts of your life than to present myself for your rejection in person. But when it came time for me to disappear again, I couldn't bring myself to do it. I'm sorry I'm such a coward."

Bella reached forward and gripped his icy fingers. "You're here now, so I'd say you aren't as much of a coward as you think you are."

Cool lips ghosted over her knuckles as he rose to his feet, pulling her up with him. "I didn't want to believe it when Peter told me."

Bella lay her head on his chest taking in his scent of apples, leather, and something else, something spicy and warm. She enjoyed the feel of an arm wrapping around her, of his hand drawing circles on her back as the other went into the hair at the nape of her neck. He felt like coming home. "Believe what? What did he tell you?"

At that, he tugged her hair until her head tipped back and he could look in her eyes. "That Alice wasn't ever my mate; you weren't ever Edward's. That those two assholes lied to us and the family because they didn't want to see us happy. That I was too dumb to notice how I felt for you until it was too damn late to do anything about it. Peter told me you're my mate, Darlin'."

Bella didn't get to say a word to him about how happy that made her before his mouth covered hers in a searing kiss full of all the longing and love they'd both missed out on. For over a year, those two manipulating bastards they'd loved kept her and Jasper separate. If Bella had thought Edward couldn't be any more of an asshole, she was wrong.

But thoughts of Edward and Alice went out the window when Jasper picked her up and carried her to the bedroom. Bella sent silent thanks to whatever, or whoever, brought him back into her life. She was glad that Jasper refused to give up, happy his friends wouldn't allow him to leave without saying goodbye. She could have lost him all over again and she'd be damned if she'd squander this second chance fate provided them.