Author's Notes:

So, I've been slowly messing with this idea for a few months now. I wasn't really sure where I wanted it to go, so I kept holding onto it. Then, a few days ago I read What a Goddess Sees by Alpine992, and finally got a good idea of what I wanted to do. So, this will be a multichapter story, and as of right now I have ideas for around six chapters. We'll see how it goes.

As always I hope you enjoy this!

Disclaimer: Konosuba Copyright Studio Deen (2017)

GOD'S BLESSING ON THIS LOVE POTION!

Chapter 1: The First Day

"EeeeeeeAhhhhhHHHH!" a young man screamed as he raced through a mansion.

A young blue haired woman giggled as she ran after him, twirling her fans happily around her.

"Kazuma! Surely even a NEET like you would know how to worship a goddess like me~"

He happened to turn his head, daring a glance over his shoulder.

The look in her eyes scared him. Like she was possessed, cursed.

Well, she'd have to be, dammit! The real Aqua would never be up this early in the morning unless it was for financial gain - or someone stole the bottle of liquor that kept her company whilst she slept.

But, Kazuma had done neither of those things!

Seriously! What's gotten into these girls!?

He ran into a room and slammed the door shut. He leaned against it and breathed a sigh of relief.

There. That should-

"K-Kazuma," a young girl tugged on his shirt sleeve.

The young man's neck sounded like rusty gears as he turned toward the youngest member of his party, Megumin.

She was blushing and could barely look him in the eyes. Her smol body was quaking, and her fingers flinched as they held onto his sleeve.

"K-Kazuma," she breathed huskily, finally jerking her eyes to face his head on, "W-when I look at you i-it's like... l-like a million detonations are going off inside my b-body."

Her fingers couldn't hold any longer and fell to her side.

"This- inside my body it's- it's like an," her dreamy gaze, her flushed face, her twinkling eyes staring straight at him, "Explosion~!"

She jumped at him, and Kazuma screamed and dodged to the side.

He knew if she caught ahold of him, he was a goner. No one could escape her grasp!

The young man raced further yet through the mansion, finding a dark, secluded closet to hide inside.

Where did it all go wrong?

Then, he heard something that made the hairs on the back of his neck stand straight up.

Heavy breathing.

Fingers touched the skin on his arm.

Long blonde hair tickled his neck.

Breathy, moaning lips pressed against his ear.

"H-h-hi, master, are you ready to punish me now?"

With a scream, Kazuma kicked open the door and bolted for it.

Behind him, he could hear all three girls chanting his name, racing after him.

He saw an open window. It was his only shot!

"KAZUMAAAA!"

His feet left the ground, and he closed his eyes.

How did it come to this?

Oh, right. It started in Wiz' shop.

It was Aqua's fault, naturally. The goddess was useless at everything except getting them into more trouble.

Just look at them now. His three party members cursed and reduced to lusty sex slaves.

And Kazuma; his body plummeting to the earth.

Well, I guess I shouldn't just leave you hanging like I am - caught between three psychopathic lovers and my inevitable death. So, let's start at the beginning. Three days ago. In Wiz' shop...

Things seemed fairly normal. Well, as normal as normal could be for this party of a pervert, a weirdo, and a useless goddess. Aqua was sitting at a table, brooding over a cup of surprisingly good tea. Megumin was standing close to Kazuma, her curious eyes surveying her surroundings. Darkness was breathing heavily as she tended to Wiz, wondering for the millionth time what it would be like if she was a lich and someone used Turn Undead on her writhing, unholy body. Poor Wiz was trembling and half transparent from when Aqua greeted her so friendly earlier - a not-so-subtle ruse to get close enough to strike her with another blast from her power.

And Kazuma's hand was stinging from where he had to whack that useless goddess' head for being an idiot yet again.

Inside his head, an internal struggle was boiling over. Caught between wondering if the gods would be upset with him if he killed her, or if they'd actually be grateful for the service.

Then again, she was like an endless supply of resurrection spells. With her gone, then just a single mistake could mean gameover for Kazuma. On the other hand, would that truly be a bad thing? But then, Megumin and Darkness would be upset if they lost their de facto party leader.

Aqua would get over his loss the easiest, if she could find a new sugar daddy to take care of her debts, and occasionally spoil her with fine alcohols. Sigh.

And while he was loathe to make the girls cry over his death, Darkness was still a pervert, and Megumin was a weirdo. Sometimes he couldn't even decide which one was the lesser evil. Actually-

Hold on. It's too quiet. Where's Aqua?

It's true. Kazuma became so lost in his thoughts that he lost sight of the water goddess.

He looked around for her, but he neglected to search directly behind himself until it was too late.

He turned with wide eyes, and there she was. Aqua was holding an open bottle, with an eerie mist slowly wafting from the bottle's neck. She blew on the perfume, sending it on its way toward Kazuma.

The young man breathed it in and started choking.

Aqua just smiled at him.

"What the hell was that, Aqua!?"

The young woman just smiled and looked all cute and innocent, holding her arms behind her back and leaning toward him.

"I just hit you with a lovely potion, so now you'll finally spoil me like a goddess, such as I, deserves. How do you feel, Kazuma?"

He stared at her blankly.

"Like I want to ask for a refund from the gods."

Aqua's mouth dropped, then closed. Her cheeks puffed out and her eyes started watering up.

"KazuMAAAA! Don't say such things!"

The young man was ready to go back to his bed and rethink his new life. Again.

But Wiz stopped him with a worried look on her face.

"O-oh, Kazuma, that potion..."

The man paused and stared at her with equal worry.

"Please, don't tell me it's actually a death poison, Wiz..."

She put her hands up and shook her head.

"N-no, it's not! B-but you need to know: It's actually a love potion."

Kazuma's eyes got wide.

"Wait- so what does that mean? Will super hot babes smell this scent on me and fall in love with me? Oh crap-"

He looked at all the women, and the loli, in front of him with a shocked expression.

Wiz interrupted his escalating thoughts, however.

"N-no. It- it only affects those that were already in love with you."

The young man blinked.

"Oh? How so?"

Wiz rubbed her hands together, looking around awkwardly at anything but Kazuma.

"W-well... it works by releasing their inner desires from all inhibitions; exciting their passion to such a degree where they'll feel like they will die without your love."

The young man gulped.

"Does this potion turn my lover into a yandere!?"

Wiz yelped, "No! I wouldn't say it goes that far, but..."

"B-but?"

"Their attempts to gain your love will escalate with each passing day they don't consummate their love with you. Most people gladly accept it on the first day, so I'm not sure what will happen if you wait longer than one day..."

She gave him a sheepish smile.

Aqua, Darkness, and Megumin listened to all of this carefully. Yet, they never showed a change in express, or any worry really.

Kazuma studied them closely.

Aqua smiled at him.

"Kazuma~" she said cutely, "I'm feeling a little hungry now, would you please buy me dinner~?"

She worked her adorable charms on him. The young man frowned.

Yeah, there was simply no way any of these girls loved him. They just wanted to use him; wringing him dry for their selfish purposes.

Oh well. That didn't mean that there wasn't a woman out there that secretly loved him!

Yeah!

So, with a newfound spring in his step, he left the shop with a wave to Wiz, and three young women who walked beside him.

Their party was sitting around a table in the guild hall.

Kazuma was solemnly eating his roast pork, his eyes casually searching across the room.

Any second now.

They would come flocking to him like crazy.

Who would it be?

Maybe Chris? He wouldn't mind if she took her own panties off for him, after all. She might have been on the smaller side, but he wasn't one to complain if a woman offered herself up to him.

Or Luna? Getting first dibs on good quests would certainly be an added bonus. Not to mention her boobs. And that fine ass~

While he was waiting for a flood of women to come vying for his attention, his party members were sitting close to him.

Aqua was leaning her head on his shoulder, and talking to him about anything and everything. Which was fairly normal behavior for her. Except she refused to talk to anyone but him, which was abnormal and he wished she'd buzz off for a few minutes.

His lap was warmer than usual, too. And that was because Megumin had her legs in his lap. She claimed it was because she was still tired from her target practice that morning, even though she seemed perfectly fine at the magic shop mere minutes earlier. The sneaky loli was probably gonna ask him to carry her home, too. Ugh.

Darkness, however, was behaving just as one would expect from a Darkness. She was leaning over the table, staring straight at Kazuma. Her eyes moved from the pork in his hands, to his viciously powerful jaw, to his swallowing throat. With each passing second, her breathing was getting heavier. Heavier... Heavier~!

"Ack!" he yelled, pushing Megumin's legs off his lap, and throwing Aqua aside.

He got up and started to walk home, irritated that the girls somehow managed to ruin yet another meal for him.

"KAZUMA!" called Aqua.

"I'm Kazuma."

She sidled up beside him, rubbing her cheek on his shoulder.

"Hey, Kazuma, why don't we take a walk somewhere? We never get to spend time together, you know."

He stared blankly at her.

"Who are you in debt to this time?"

She blinked and tugged on his arm.

"Nobody! Why would you think this is a ploy to get money off you? Do you really think so lowly of me, a goddess? I can take care of myself, Kazuma!"

His expression never changed.

"So who do you owe money?"

"Kazuma! I don't want your money! I just want y- eep!"

He watched as she closed her lips tight, and her whole face started blushing.

"Hey, Aqua, if you have something to say, you can just spit it out."

Her lips opened and closed. Finally, she breathed in and out, and seemed to gather the strength to speak her mind.

"K-Kazuma, th-the truth is that... I... I'm madly in-"

"Kazuma!" yelled Darkness and Megumin simultaneously.

"There you are!" Megumin called, wrapping her arms around his other arm.

Aqua looked absolutely scandalized.

Megumin smirked at her evilly.

"Hey, Kazuma, I need you to carry me home," she desperately pleaded.

"Why? You're walking fine right now."

Megumin blinked, then grabbed her chest dramatically.

"Oh! My magic! My energy! They have fled from me! Oh, I'm so weak! Oh, oh no, I'm falling. Please, Kazuma, please catch me!"

She put her arms out toward him-

And the ground caught her fall.

She coughed and looked up at him, her face hurt and teary eyed.

Aqua smirked down at her.

Both girls stuck their tongues out.

Kazuma was quick on his feet to get away from these clingy, hopeless girls. But he wasn't fast enough to escape Darkness. He started taking alleyways and hopping fences and even swam across a pond to get away from her. But she always managed to materialize on the other side before he even got there.

"Hey, Kazuma~" she said cutely.

Oi, why does she have to be so hot, and now she's cute!? If she wasn't such a pervert, she would be perfect for me.

"I-I noticed how you keep running away from me."

He nodded. No point in lying about that.

"A-a-are you angry with me? Have I done something displeasing to you? Do I need to be punished!?"

Kazuma sighed.

"No, Darkness, I just want some time alone."

The young woman blinked, then started frowning.

"Oh, I see..."

She gave him a cold shoulder, then walked away.

The young man blinked.

Did I do something wrong? Why are they acting so weird to me today?

Kazuma returned to his mansion, alone and confused.

Where was the hordes of sexy babes ready to submit themselves to his every perverted fantasy?

Gah!

He took a bath, the lukewarm water sitting idly 'round his body.

With a sigh, he got out of the bath and dressed himself in a towel. He gazed forlornly out the window, seeing the evening sun dipping behind the hills.

Maybe the potion has a delayed effect?

Yeah. That has to be it.

He would go to sleep, and the potion would work it's magic over his body's pheromones while he dreamed of all the women that were soon to be his.

Yeah~

He stretched and left the bathing chamber.

Clad in just his towel, he walked toward his bedroom.

"Kazuma!" yelled three girls simultaneously.

"I'm Kazuma."

"Where have you been?" demanded Megumin.

"I took a bath."

Darkness sidled up to him, gazing down at him cutely.

"Hey, Kazuma, I prepared your bed~"

She opened the door for him.

"There's even a rug on the floor in case-" she gasped, "I-in case y-you want me to sleep on your floor l-like I'm nothing more than your pet..."

Her breasts heaved with every flushed breath.

The young man scratched his chin.

"No, thanks. You can sleep in your own room tonight, Darkness."

The blonde immediately moaned, falling against the doorframe, struggling to breathe.

"I-I'm not even worthy to s-sleep on his floor like a dog... K-Kazuma never ceases to disappoint my expectations..."

Kazuma's eyes widened.

"Hey! Just because I want to sleep in peace doesn't mean this is some sick perversion of mine!"

His arm was tugged.

"Kazuma~" spoke the sweetest voice in all heaven.

"I'm Kazuma," he stared at those twinkling blue eyes.

"You'll let me sleep in your bed, won't you?"

She rubbed her hands on his arm, and then his chest. Her cheeks were flushed pink. Her feminine body was covered in her usual sky blue pajamas. She'd lowered her pose a little more than usual, just so Kazuma could look down her shirt if he wanted to.

Her fingers stroked their way up to his neck.

"You know you're... you're kinda... average, for a young man~"

She leaned toward him, puckering her lips; completely sure that he was going to kiss her and pamper her forever and ever and never stop loving her.

"Out," Kazuma yelled, pushing her toward the door.

Aqua suddenly found herself out in the hallway, shocked and confused.

"Hey! You can't throw a goddess out of your bed! Do you even know what you just turned down!? In case you didn't realize it, I'm a goddess!"

She called out to him until she was out of breath. Then, she heard a little snore, and she looked down at the ground where a Darkness was curled up beside the wall, shivering in her nightgown with a huge smile on her face.

Aqua hissed at her competition, but Darkness only squealed with delight.

Inside his bedroom, Kazuma changed into his pajamas and got into bed.

And now that all the girls were removed from his bedroom, it was time to get some sleep.

His eyes were closed, he snuggled deeply into his blankets, and he was starting to drift off into a deep, peaceful sleep.

"Oi, Megumin."

He only spoke. His eyes hadn't opened nor did his body move.

But, there was this curious bulge in his blankets that jerked after he called out.

"W-who's Megumin?" whimpered a tiny voice.

Kazuma groaned, "Don't answer if you're going to pretend like you're someone else!"

He ripped the blankets away, revealing a crimson ball curled up by his feet; more so resembling a cat than a young arch wizard.

Megumin blushed fiercely, "U-uh, m-meow?"

Kazuma pointed at the door with a deadpan look, "Out."

He ushered her over to the door, but Megumin was on the floor clinging to his legs now.

"Where's your dignity? What would the others say if they saw you being like this!?"

"They'd call you heartless because you're throwing out your friend into the cold hallway!"

The young man's heart was unmoved by her desperate pleas. He slammed his door open, accidentally hitting Darkness, whom gave off a deliciously painful moan and begged for more. Ignoring the blonde woman, he shook Megumin off his leg and dumped her outside.

She was on her knees, leaning forward onto her hands, pouting and whimpering.

"P-please, let me back in! K-Kazuma!"

He didn't even blink as he pointed at the ground and said, "Stay."

He shut the door behind him and hopped into bed. As he fell asleep, he wondered just which girls in town were going to jump his bones tomorrow.

Aqua was walking down the hallway, heading back toward Kazuma's bedroom door. She was dragging blankets and pillows along the way. Yet, she paused when she saw a curious sight waiting for her at the door.

Darkness was fast asleep, curled up in a ball beside the door, perhaps hoping to be struck again. And on top of the sleeping blonde, a crimson ball was curled; reminiscent of a kitten resting atop a puppy.

Aqua smiled, then got down on the ground with them and threw the covers over their bodies. She moved herself so that she could be Darkness' little spoon. And while she wished it was Kazuma's arm that had curled around her stomach, it still felt pretty great to be held.