"How strange life is; it's all there is, for now at least, but to some it seems to have such little meaning."

I felt like writing a Gray-centric thing, so here's what came out of that lmfao

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In a room blacker than night, devoid of stars or any other such beauties, he floated. It was some shattered gap between everywhere and nowhere, the kind of lonely afterlife he'd always thought would suit him best.

He deserved nothing more.

It stayed that way for forever, yet not forever. He did not age, or move, or even feel the time pass by and yet he knew it had been an eternity by the time the first angel showed up. The angel was brighter than anything he'd ever seen, yet it cast light on nothing, as if her healthy glow was sucked up by the dark abyss.

Suddenly, as if nothing had changed at all, he found himself on a circular piece made of stone like material. Weight and being almost meant nothing.

The angel's hands came to a prayer position right over her chest. She didn't speak aloud, but directly into his mind, "Gray Fullbuster, you are now ready for judgement."

Judgment. Of course. Religions actually managed to predict the afterlife. Thinking with this, he's sure that his life choices had left a nasty taste in God's mouth. He didn't respond, just staring off into the world of nothingness before him.

"Your first judge: the one you were cruelest to in your life."

Gray cocked his head, brows knitting together in a thin line. People in his life were the judges?

'God no, just please send me to Hell and get it over with. Please.'

Gray tried to shut his eyes to block it all out, to make it go away, like slamming the door the hardest you can behind you to avoid something you didn't want to deal with. However, his eyes still stayed open.

He knew who it would be.

A pocked of light turned within itself. Something within took form and stepped forward onto another stone-like structure like Gray's. It was him, he knew it would be, but that definition didn't make it any easier.

"Oh, Snowflake," he said, his signature grin embedded upon his face, "I almost missed you for a second there."

Gray couldn't meet his eyes and couldn't form words, his lips trembled as his eyes fell to the stone beneath his feet.

"Look at me, Ice Block."

Gray obliged.

"When this whole thing first started, you destroyed all of the mementos I had collected over the years. The only memories I had of Igneel and reminders of the missions we'd gone on, things that have helped me grow. Every memory I've ever had. They were erased forever. Gone. I didn't want to admit it, but i was upset for months. They were my joy, reminders of life when it was simple and fun, a time before dark guilds and evil mages, which you destroyed."

There was nothing Gray wanted to do more than squeeze his eyes shut, but it seemed as if he was unable to. His body wouldn't allow it and he was forced to watch the sadness in Natsu's eyes as he spoke.

"That was your most cruel action, it wasn't when we brawled or insulted each other. It hurt me more than anything anyone has ever done to me. You, Gray, to torch away my precious memories like that."

Before Gray could muster the courage to apologize, Natsu had slipped away into the light again, leaving no trace behind. It was like he'd never even been there in the first place. Gray felt sick, so humanly sick in his gut, everywhere. But he knew there would be no relief, there never would.

The angel didn't care to wait, "Your second judge: the one you were most kind to in life."

Once more a pocket of life appeared and once more something stepped forward onto the stone tile. Gray's eyes widened at who it was, trying to understand.

"You didn't expect to see me again, eh?" His smile was wide as ever.

"But how..?"

"Oi, dumbass, your mind likes to play tricks on you. You probably thought that since you've made me miserable there's no possible way you could've ever made me happy. You should've known life's much more than that."

Still Gray searched for words, but it was for nought.

"Yes, you were harsh and cruel at times, but it wasn't always like that. Your pain changed you, and even then, you weren't really a bad person. Just one that lashed out once in a while because you didn't know how to handle everything."

Natsu paused before beginning again.

"My favorite memory of you is when we were about ten. I had lost Igneel's scarf and I didn't know what to do. Not only did you help me look for it, but when you found it muddy torn, you fixed it and gave it back to me. No one else had ever done something like that for me before. I was so happy, happier and more relieved than I had ever been in my life. And you were the cause of those feelings."

Gray barely even remembered any of that for some reason. Had he really done something to make Natsu that happy? Why didn't he remember that, but he could remember such other terrible things so clearly?"

He disappeared into the light again as Gray tried to search deeply for himself, his soul. Digging for answers but turning up with nothing in hand. The angel, as kind as they could be, did not wait for Gray to figure it out.

"Your third judge: the one whose life you have saved."

Gray froze. "The one whose life you have saved". Gray didn't think he'd ever saved someone significant before, he's only done things far from it. Perhaps no one would walk through this time.

But just like clockwork, he was back, his smile warmer than ever.

Gray gaped at him, "No. No, I killed you. Is this some sort of joke? I never saved you."

"Oh, Gray." Natsu called him by name this time, "It was mercy. Besides, the weapon had dug too close to my heart. Letting me go peacefully doesn't make it your fault. Did you feel guilty all this time?"

Gray couldn't find it in him to respond, his jaw clenching tightly instead.

"It was time for me to go. My death was no fault of yours. The fact that you stayed with me until the end so that I wouldn't be alone meant more to me than anything. You saved me."

Suddenly, the words Gray had been looking for all along had finally come, choked and ragged as they were, "I love you, Natsu. I'm so sorry I wasn't better for you."

"Shh, it's alright. I know. I'll be waiting for you."

One final time, he faded away.

"And now, your final judge: the one whose life you took."

Gray nails pressed hard into his skin so hard that if he weren't in a sort of heaven they would be bleeding. He breathed deep as a last resort to keep himself together. For when the swirling light came once again, it was not Natsu who had walked through the first three time. No, nothing like Natsu. It was something more familiar and terrifying.

Himself.

Gray fought so hard to look away from his own face, his own lives, harder than he'd ever fought in his life, but he just couldn't. There was no power inside Gray anymore, everything was broken and destroyed as Gray stood there, staring and sobbing at his own reflection.

"This is probably pretty rough for you, isn't it?" His reflection said to him, pursing his lips in thought.

Gray let out a croak as a response.

"You've always been too hard on yourself. It's time you should get a bit of peace too, you know that right?"

"I don't deserve it," Gray whispered, shaking.

"Everyone does. The world is a cruel and complicated place. Everyone has pain and everyone has different ways of dealing with it. You're no exception. You just consumed yourself in pain, burying yourself in it until you couldn't anymore."

"You heard Natsu's words and you've seen the signature smile he still wears, the one that makes your heart throb every time. You hurt him, yes, but you were also the reason he lived, the light of his life. Natsu died because the weapon went through his heart, not because you weren't worth it or you couldn't save him. Natsu loved you and still loves you, and you're not a bad person for all the things you've suffered. I only wish I could've shown you that earlier."

"You've spent long enough convincing yourself that you don't deserve to be happy. It's time to rest now, Gray. Be at peace."

His reflection held out a hand.

Gray took a big step forward, and took it.

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