He looked at the stranger staring back at him in the mirror. Maybe stranger wasn't the exact word- familiar stranger was closer to it, for he knew this person a bit. Beneath the black liner and stylishly ruffled hair- he knew this part of himself, even if he hadn't planned on letting it take over. The corner of his mouth lifted as he realized he felt as though he were living someone else's life – the other more successful him, he thought. He'd wanted success…

Yeah, I wanted success…

He sighed and washed his face. A stirring from the bedroom made him glance at the bed's reflection from where he stood. Short dark hair was splayed across the pillow and he was glad that her face was averted. His eyes fell to his cell phone on the night stand.

I need…

He approached the phone studying it while almost holding his breath. He picked it up and went to his contacts. There, his finger hovered over her name before finally pressing it.

"Hello?"

His throat went dry. He couldn't speak for a moment.

"Sorry it's so late." He spoke hurriedly so that she would not say his name. He moved back to the bathroom and sat on the edge of the tub.

"It's okay," she stifled a yawn.

"How's Vegas?"

"Fine."

"Dude you're in the big time now. Fine seems a bit mundane for description."

He closed his eyes letting her voice take him to where he needed to be- a safe place.

"I guess…"

Tell me you need me for something…anything…..

"…..something wrong?"

Everything…without you…

"It's okay."

She laughed nervously.

"I get it. You're probably a bit worn from the partying; different girl every night huh?"

He smiled at the picture that she painted. It wasn't untrue- at least not in appearance, the tone however…

"Well, I'm glad that you have everything that you want. You deserve it."

I don't want to be without you.

He gave an empty chuckle.

Yeah, I deserved it… I left you… I didn't make my feelings known…

"I'll let you get some rest."

Don't hang up.

"Call me anytime."

I don't want to be alone again.

"Night Jesse."

I don't want to sleep without you by my side again…

"Goodnight Jane."

He went back into the bedroom, placed the phone back by the bed and picked up a small sachet with the pills in them.

These will get me back to you… At least temporarily…

He took a few and waited for them to take effect. He felt a feminine hand that he'd forgotten was there. He didn't look at her- he didn't have to. Her lips on his shoulder made him close his eyes. He allowed her to pull him back on the bed and do what she was there to do. He felt an eternity pass while waiting for the pills to work their magic and when they did, they hit hard.

Something's not right. Maybe I took too many…I'm not ready to- not yet… I don't want to die.

"You okay?"

The worried face of the naked stranger asked him.

"What-?"

"I think you took too many."

He tried to reassure her that he was ok. He tried to sit up, but she put a hand on his chest.

"I'm okay." He struggled for a moment before sitting up. "Why don't you go and get yourself something nice for tonight. She looked at him. He patted her hand. "I'll be fine. I'll wait up." He reached past her to the bedside drawer and pulled out the envelope from the back of the drawer.

"Here you go."

She retrieved her clothes and after dressing and casting him a glance she left. He switched off the bedside lamp I fell back on the bed. Eyes open, the thoughts of Lawndale flooded in. Their talks, her smile, her humor all served to make him feel- something he'd been sorely lacking. It was nice to be something other than hollow, even though it would take its toll and the crushing weight of emotions would send him down the same path again…