Written for Edwin Week 2020! Day 5: Butterflies

Ed felt like he was on the verge of exploding. If he stopped pacing he was sure it would happen, or something else equally as catastrophic. Al had been snickering for the past five minutes like the asshole he was, and Ed swore once his mind was a little more clear, he'd get him back good.

"Are you ever going to tell me what's got you so worked up this time? I mean, I can make a few guesses, but I thought I'd be nice and let you tell me first." Ed stopped his pacing to glare at his brother, who only laughed harder. He was enjoying himself, sitting on the couch as if listening to a radio drama. Drinking milk. It made Ed sick.

"Who said it was any of your business?! I don't remember asking you for help."

"So you need help with something. Interesting," Al said, resting his chin on his hand.

Ed could feel his cheeks heating up and quickly turned away. "It's no big deal."

"Seriously brother," Al sighed. "You're so nervous I can feel it from over here. It's about Winry, isn't it?"

"Huh? What? No!" he stammered, wanting to be anywhere besides where he was at the moment.

"So it is Winry," Al said, still grinning like a madman. "You're gonna confess to her, aren't you?"

Ed paled. "No! Well… I mean, not really! It's weird, okay!" He hated how perceptive Al was, it was like he was seeing right into his head. He'd been like that for as long as he could remember, and it made him feel like an open book no matter how hard he tried to hide his emotions.

Al rolled his eyes. "Why don't you just tell her? The worst that can happen is she'll laugh at you, and she does that all the time anyways."

"It's not that easy! What if she makes fun of me for the rest of my life? And then things get really awkward around here and we have to find somewhere else to live? And then Winry falls for some automail patient who's really annoying and tall and-"

"I think you're overthinking this," Al interjected. "If she doesn't like you, then please explain to me why I caught her staring at you so much over the past few years. I've only ever seen her look at automail like that. That's the highest compliment you can get."

Damn his brother was perceptive. How was he supposed to know that? Regardless, knowing Winry might respond well was enough to calm his nerves a little. Not enough to keep him from sweating buckets, but it was still something.

"Fine. Since you obviously think I'm incompetent or something, I'll prove to you that I can do it," Ed huffed, turning on his heel and marching down the hall without a second glance back. What right did Al have to act like he knew everything there was to know about romance? He had no more experience than Ed did. If he was determined to act like a smartass about it, then Ed would have to prove him wrong.

He'd do it this time. No more stammering or backpedaling or blushing. He'd march up to her and tell her in one go without a moment's hesitation. Hell, he'd fought God. Confessing to his mechanic was nothing compared to that.

Ed could hear the whir of tools as he neared her door, making him release the breath he'd been holding in. Good, she couldn't have been able to hear his conversation, then.

No hesitation, he reminded himself. Ed gripped the doorknob and held on until he saw his knuckles growing white. No backing down this time.

Steadying himself with a deep breath, he flung open the door in one swoop, letting his legs carry him straight to Winry's workbench without a moment to spare. She turned slowly and lifted an eyebrow, unimpressed.

"Don't tell me you did something stupid again. I only just fixed up your leg," she sighed, setting down her tools.

This was worse than fighting God, Ed determined. All at once he could feel his confidence abandon him, leaving him stranded as a hollow shell. His stomach had somehow contracted into itself, fluttering in a way that made it impossible to breathe. He didn't dare open his mouth, fearing the words he practiced in his head would spill out in a jumbled mess.

Ed didn't move, he couldn't, because all of a sudden Winry was staring at him with those eyes that seeped him of his strength and left him vulnerable. He couldn't do this, he was a fool for thinking he could, and now he was stuck.

"Ed?"

He'd known Winry his whole life, and never had it been so hard to talk to her than this moment. Conversation between the two would usually flow naturally, and they knew each other inside and out. Now, he couldn't even seem to get a word out.

Love was stupid, Ed decided.

"Nevermind," he blurted out, rushing out of the room without turning back.

"How did it go?" he heard Al ask from the living room. It didn't take a genius to realize that thirty seconds was entirely too short to confess your feelings.

"Shut up."

"Not well?"

"Shut up!" He had started pacing again, he noticed with annoyance.

Al had a smug look on his face, and Ed did not like it. Al rarely made that face, but when he did, Ed always seemed to be the victim."Alright then, looks like I'll have to intervene."

"Don't you dare." He stared daggers into Al, who was seemingly unfazed.

"Winry! Can you come out here for a minute?" he shouted, cupping his hands around his mouth.

"Al!" Ed tried to grab him, but he hopped out of the way with grace, landing back on the couch.

He'd have to accept his fate and the embarrassment that came along with it, because at this point it was too late. Winry was opening the door, and Ed was still stuck recovering from his failure a moment earlier. Yes, Al would definitely be getting payback for this.

"What's with you two? First Ed barges into my room like he's been possessed and now you're looking like you just smuggled in a cat." She paused to look between the two. "You didn't, did you?"

"Not this time," Al said. "Ignore brother, he's being overdramatic as usual. I just wanted to let you two know that there's supposed to be a meteor shower tonight."

That was not what Ed had been expecting, but knowing Al, there was a reason behind it.

"I'm a bit tired so I think I'm going to sit this one out, but you two should go watch it! It's supposed to be really pretty, and Resembool is one of the towns listed for the highest visibility."

Ed wanted to be mad, but honestly, this was far better than the alternative. If anything, Al was doing him an enormous favor right now. Not that he'd admit it, though.

"Oh that sounds fun! There hasn't been a good one since we were little! You'll watch with me, right Ed?"

"Yeah, sure." He looked away, unconsciously rubbing the back of his neck.

"I'll finish up this piece then before it gets dark," she smiled, darting back into her room with a hop in her step.

Al turned and raised his eyebrows. "Smart, right?"

Ed couldn't help the small smile that tugged at his mouth. "You win this time."

Winry looked herself over one more time in the mirror, making sure she hadn't missed anything. It was stupid, really, getting all dressed up just to sit out in the front yard. It was only Ed, after all.

That didn't change things, though. Since the moment she realized she loved him she'd waited for him to reciprocate, not wanting to push her feelings onto him when he wasn't ready. Despite that, she still had her limits, and impatience began to gnaw away at her by the day. Every time they got close he'd spring away like he'd been electrocuted, changing subjects until she'd forgotten what they'd been talking about in the first place.

If he couldn't make the first move, she'd just have to do it for him. Al had provided the perfect opportunity where it'd just be them, and she couldn't be grateful enough. Every time she'd talked with Ed there'd been some sort of interruption, preventing them from ever being able to go anywhere with their conversations. There had never been time before with everything going on, but now that the Promised Day was over they finally had a chance to rest and reflect.

She wanted to take advantage of that period of rest while she could, because who knew when the brothers would be swept up in another adventure. She only had so much time to let him know how she felt, because as much as she was a part of his life, she didn't want to lose him to someone else because of her own cold feet. If he didn't feel the same, then she'd cross that bridge when she came to it. At least she would've tried.

That's why, after taking the time to justify it to herself, she didn't mind dressing up a little. This was sort of a date… right? It'd be silly to watch the stars in her jumpsuit. She decided the blue dress she'd gotten from Riza for her birthday would do fine, and made her way to the front yard.

To her amusement, Ed was already outside, and not without his own set of surprises. A large blanket was spread across the grass, with a lantern set off to the side. Ed sat transfixed on a mug in his hand, pouring something into it with so much focus that he hadn't seemed to notice her walk up.

"What's all this?"

He startled, splashing the drink over the side of the mug and onto his pants with a yelp. "What the hell?! When did you show up?"

She rolled her eyes. "Hello to you too."

He handed her a second mug, one without spillage on the sides, and his eyes roamed over her dress to her face.

Winry was quick to explain herself. "I know it's a little fancy, I just haven't worn this yet and-"

"It's pretty," Ed interrupted, quickly turning to finish pouring his own drink. Winry could've sworn she saw his cheeks turn pink.

The mug was warm, and after taking a sip she was delighted to find it was hot cocoa. Without any milk, of course.

"So what's with the whole setup?" she asked.

"You said the last time Resembool had one of these was when we were kids, right? Seemed like a special occasion." He shrugged his shoulders.

"It's nice. I didn't expect you to prepare something." She settled down next to him on the blanket, stretching out her legs in front of her. Stars filled the sky like spilled glitter, sparkling more brightly than she'd seen in weeks. They were the most beautiful thing about Resembool, and something she'd dearly missed during her time in various cities. Nothing could compare to a clear night sky, and Ed followed her gaze with his own share of amazement.

"I can't remember the last time I saw stars like this. Maybe when Al and I were training with teacher," he shuddered. That was a story she'd never gotten a full description of, but by the way he reacted any time it was brought up, she didn't think it would be a good idea to pry.

Instead, she sipped on her cocoa, falling into comfortable silence with Ed beside her. He stiffened when she leaned up against him, but otherwise didn't make a sound.

After their drinks were finished she fell on her back, looking straight up with her hair splayed out behind her. Ed soon followed suit, his hair mixing with her own. Their shoulders were touching, and it was strange to feel the warmth of skin instead of cool metal. He'd only been home a month, having been in Central for Al's recovery, so Winry was still trying to adjust to his flesh and bone arm and Al's real body.

Thinking about the day they returned, she quickly scrambled for something to say, not wanting to break into tears out of nowhere. She still got overwhelmed with emotion, knowing they had accomplished their goal. The image of their smiles, bright as the night sky, was seared into her brain in full detail.

"You're supposed to make a wish, you know," she remarked, breaking the silence.

"Mmm. Already did," he said, eyes still drawn to the stars.

"Really? I thought you would think wishes were a silly fairy tale or something."

She felt his head shake slightly against hers. "Mom would always tell us a wish was more like a promise. Something you act on to make true. I don't believe things like that can happen without any effort on my part."

She smiled, expecting an answer along those lines. Ed was passionate about his promises, years spent with him had only proved so.

"So what was your wish? What's your promise this time?"

She felt him tense against her as he stammered out a reply. "That's supposed to be private! It's embarrassing if you say it out loud."

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours. Equivalent exchange." That would get him, she knew.

"Fine. You first, though."

Winry hadn't really made a wish, but it wasn't hard to think of one. Not at all.

"I want to keep seeing you smile, like you did that day you came back," she said, hoping he didn't notice her blush. "I want you and Al to be happy, and for you to not to bear so many burdens anymore." Swallowing her pride, she turned towards him and looked him in the eyes. He stared back with the same amount of wonder he had given the stars. "I want to keep that wish alive for as long as I can."

"Lots of wishes," he teased through his smile, not breaking away from her gaze. "Mine isn't too far off." He gulped, getting that faraway look in his eyes like he did when he was around her. It was reminiscent of earlier in the afternoon, when he had barged into her room for no apparent reason. "I want things to stay like this. I don't want you to cry anymore, or worry anymore. I um-" he paused, glancing down. "I…" his relaxed attitude suddenly stiffened into something full of stutters and nerves.

He found her eyes again, and this time, they burned with the same spark they had when he declared he would be a state alchemist. This time though, instead of that desperate determination and a far off look, he was staring right at her. The fierceness wasn't harsh, only hopeful. She couldn't help the feeling it gave her, and suddenly she felt the urge to squirm from the butterflies fluttering in her stomach.

"I want to stay with you! Here, or wherever else you want to be. Because… because…" his voice shook, and he sucked in a breath as he squeezed his eyes shut. "I really like you! Not just normally, I mean… every time I see you I get this stupid fluttery feeling in my stomach and it drives me insane because no one else gives me that feeling but I always ignored it because you're just supposed to just be my mechanic which is what I told everyone when they asked about us and-"

Winry couldn't help it. She burst into laughter, making him stop his nonsensical ranting and turn a shockingly bright shade of red.

"Hey!"

"I really like you too, dork. I have for a while now."

His eyes grew wide. "Huh? Really?"

"Yes, really. I realized one day and accepted it. In fact, if you hadn't, I probably would've told you the same thing. Not the way you put it though," she giggled.

"Oh. I guess I liked you for a long time too, I just… ignored it. I was supposed to be focused on other things, you know? I pushed it away 'cause I didn't know how to deal with it. I still don't really know what I'm doing," he admitted.

"Me either. It's okay."

He looked awkward, shifting around on the blanket. "So uh… what now?"

"I don't know." She really didn't. What were you supposed to do after confessing your feelings to someone? This was still Ed, it wasn't like he was a stranger. What were they supposed to change if they were… together now? "We'll figure it out. For now, let's just stay like this."

"Right. That works." He seemed to relax again, letting out a sigh and looking back at the stars. They fell back into a silence, tension having cleared from the air. The butterflies nesting in her stomach seemed to have flown away, because now all she felt was peace.

Their hands clumsily found their way to each other, and they sat like that for what could've been hours, watching the stars and making silent promises to one another.