DISCLAIMER: I do not own Pokémon, or the song 'Nothing Else Matters'.

This story is heavily based on the song 'Nothing Else Matters' by Metallica. It's a beautiful song - if you're not familiar with it, I'd recommend giving it a listen.

Trust I Seek, and I Find in You

I never really do this. It's a funny idea, writing down your thoughts; always makes me think of shrinks or creepy old ladies with crystal balls. Until now, I don't think I've ever needed to get stuff off my chest, to be honest. But the last few days have been crazy, like REALLY crazy, and since all my friends have left for home, I figured this'd be a good time to give it a go.

Thing is, I've had this weird feeling for a while, and not because I'm back home either. I didn't tell anyone because I thought I was just sad about losing at the Battle Pyramid, but it was still there even after I won my rematch. Then I thought maybe it was because I was near the end of another journey. Didn't feel like this when I came back from Hoenn, though, or the Orange Islands. I suppose I'm leaving all my pokémon behind at the lab, too, which is always pretty sad. Except Pikachu, of course (he's waving at me over by that big tree). But it's not any of those things, I know it. See, I actually think I've figured it out, and that's what's been confusing me the most:

I can't stop thinking about Misty.

When I lost to Brandon, Professor Oak gave me all these cool gifts from everybody. Man, you shoulda seen the awesome banner my pokémon made! I also got a postcard from Gary in Sinnoh, and the way he talked about it when we battled earlier really made me wanna go there next. But the best thing by far was one of Misty's ACTUAL Mini-Misty lures. Can you believe it? And I'd never seen this one before, so she musta just made it recently or something. I've got it right here, in fact! Scary how much it looks like her – still got that red hair and ponytail and bluey green eyes – although this version of Misty's a bit more stubby than scrawny. Haha, she'd totally mallet me if she was here to read that! But she's not, and that's the whole point. As amazing as this gift is, and as psyched as I am to go fishing with it when I head out on my journey again, I think seeing this little plastic model of my best friend only makes me wish I could spend more time with the real thing.

You wanna know what one of my first thoughts was after I beat the Battle Frontier? "Misty'll be so proud of me". And when Brandon asked me to be a Frontier Brain, I had to wonder, "well, Mist, you still gonna call me Mr. Pokémon Master now?". I know, it's crazy! But even though they probably should, these things just don't feel weird to think about. If anything, I feel surer of myself than I have for a real long time – maybe even ever! It's kinda hard to explain, so I'm just gonna go ahead and hope for the best.

It took me a looooooooooong time to realise it, but Misty's been my best friend since the moment we first met. Took even longer than that to admit it, believe me! Not to her, of course, but there's no way she doesn't already know. I guess you could say we're close, then, but it's a kind of different close. Misty's the only friend besides Gary that I've ever fought with a lot, and they're the two closest people to me, so maybe it's got something to do with that? Anyway, the point is she sent me that lure to cheer me up even though the last time we saw each other was months ago, and before that…jeez, I can't even remember how long ago it was. It's made me realise that no matter where I go, no matter how far away my journey takes me, I know this awesome friendship we have will last forever.

But that brings me onto the other thing. This closeness I talked about: what is it, exactly? It's not the same as my friendship with Gary, or Brock, or May and Max, or even Pikachu. And when I think of Misty, I get this kind of warm shiver up my spine like there's a charmander on my back. My stomach goes all sloshy and heavy. And I feel nervous out of nowhere for no reason at all. This can't all be because of the lure, right? Because it all seems so familiar, like I've felt it before but just not noticed. Or maybe I've been feeling it all along? Wow. Gotta say, it's not often I think this deeply about something. I can tell what I'm writing is coming straight from the heart, which is strangely making me feel better already. Well, people say I wear my heart on my sleeve as it is, but I don't think that's true. It's not as if I've ever let on about this stuff to anyone before…have I?

My journey over the years has taught me to trust my gut, and what my gut's telling me right now is that whatever this is I'm feeling, it's okay to feel that way, you know? And after all these intense thoughts I've had, I don't think I could go back now even if I wanted to. I'll be 18 in a couple of weeks, and Misty's 18th birthday was…five, six months ago? We're both adults now (well, near enough); is this how adults think all the time? No wonder they look so stressed out! If I went back in time to tell 10-year-old me I'd eventually grow to like the bad-tempered redhead whose bike I borrowed (NOT STOLE!), I'd have laughed right in my face – and maybe thrown up. And that wouldn't even have scratched the surface! Funny how things change when you get older, right? But I'm more than confident they've changed for the better.

Okay, so maybe my friends are right when they say I'm easy to read. I get to travel the world meeting new people and pokémon every day – what else is there to think about? But I do think, you know, and I do have a few things I never really talk about. Back when I was a kid, this was the sort of stuff that'd come to me at night when everyone was asleep. Sometimes I'd catch Misty singing to herself away from the campsite (same song every time – didn't she know any others?) and go and sit with her. We'd either look out at the stars or talk quietly, and when I started talking, I just couldn't stop! I dunno, it just felt natural to open myself up like that with her. It's not something I've really done with anyone else – at least, not like that. She had this little smile that she'd only ever do when I was saying these things, and something about it made me all warm and 'safe', if that makes sense. I can still see it now, clear as day, and, well, I miss it.

A pokémon trainer chooses his own path. I've been travelling for nearly half my life, and I don't think I'll ever want to stop. But at the same time, there's this urge I have, this 'pull' that always makes me wanna keep coming back home. It's not just to see Mom either, not anymore. Suddenly, I really want to go and see my best friend. I wonder if there's time to stop off at Cerulean City before I catch the boat to Sinnoh tomorrow. A gym leader's gotta get up at what, 5 in the morning or something stupid like that? Hopefully seeing her in person will help me understand this weird feeling. Well, that, and it's been a while since I've had a good argument! Then again, maybe I shouldn't, because as soon as we're together again, I know I won't want it to end. My life on the road is mine to live however I want, and so is hers running the gym, but if I'd had the choice, she'd still be right here by my side, like it was in the beginning.

If I told Brock any of this, I know just the kind of stuff he'd come out with. May, too. And my mom – don't even get me started! Truth is, I've never been one for all that 'romance' crap. Even the word makes me shiver a little! But without any of that, I'm starting to think how I feel is along those lines. Isn't there a version of this where you don't have to do all the flowers and dancing and fancy stuff? I mean, those girly movies that Misty likes? God, they make me wanna poke my eyes out! Brock likes them too, though, so he sometimes makes me watch them with him. I've never told anyone this, but when it gets to the kissing part, I sometimes get this image in my head, where I'm the guy in the movie and Misty is the girl. As in, you know…kissing. Is that normal? Man, it's giving me tingles just writing about it. And the more it happens, the more I want to do it. I still hate those dumb flicks, though. There's so much fuss over everything, so many stupid words and symbols. Isn't the feeling what matters? And if that makes me bad at this then I don't care, because whatever the girl in those movies is to the guy, whatever the 'it' is there, I'm believing more by the minute that Misty is it to me.

And, well, while I'm being honest, that's not the only thought I've had. I keep having this same dream where she's in that mermaid costume from her sisters' water show, and with one hand she pulls me into the swimming pool, then with the other hand she [SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE SCRIBBLE]

Oops…think I got a bit carried away there. Anyway, where was I…

I sometimes wonder if it's because Misty's the first person I met on my journey. We've had the most time to get close out of everyone, technically. But then I remember things like the way she wore that pink kimono at Maiden's Peak, the look on her face when I woke up on the floor of the Pokémon Tower, the feeling I got when I knew we'd made up again after a big fight, and I know it's never been that at all. She's special. To say I trust her with my life doesn't nearly do her justice, especially since she's already saved it more than once. It can't be a coincidence that Misty of all people was there to pull me out of that river, the girl who'd eventually be my favourite person in the world. All I can say is I'm sure glad I never paid her back for that bike.

She was with me for five years, longer than anyone else – except Brock and Pikachu, of course. Through Kanto, the Orange Islands and Johto, every day was like a new journey, a new adventure, and I loved every minute of it. Then last year when she was at my house to wait for me after Hoenn, I got that feeling all over again. I was so excited – it was just like old times! Seeing her leave is always hard, and I wish more than anything that she could stay with me. But this way, I can keep looking forward to seeing her again and getting that awesome feeling when I know she's around. That's one feeling I'd never get tired of in a million years.

And hey, remember how I mentioned that we fight a lot? Well, after Misty left, I realised I actually liked it when we argued. Missed it, even! These days when I say something, I sometimes forget that she isn't still there to disagree with me. Sure, it got real annoying now and then, but all the going back and forward, the wisecracking, the old "am not, are too" thing, it was pretty fun, you know? I guess I've always been the type of guy who likes to be challenged, and not just in pokémon battles! Also – and if anyone's reading this, DON'T tell her I said this – Misty's, like, super smart, and when we disagree, the stuff she says really has a way of opening my mind, and it's amazing. Who'da thought you could learn something by having a fight? Only with Misty, I tell ya.

I guess there's a reason I've never told any of my friends about this. See, they've been winding me and Misty up for years. Brock and Gary are the worst – honestly, they don't even take no for an answer! Tracey's on board, too, though he's a bit sneakier about it. Can you believe they might actually have been right all along? They did used to tick me off something awful, and Misty got downright scary when she heard them. But ever since I first felt this way, since I first felt that shiny little fishing lure in my hand and saw its painted eyes winking up at me, I knew I didn't need to care anymore. After all, it's not teasing if it's true, right?

They can't tell me how I feel, because they'll never know like I know. Amongst all the guessing games, the tired old words, the corny songs and sickly storybook fantasies, there's one thought I'll take with me wherever I go:

It's Misty, just Misty, and nothing else matters.

Whoa! Ash, you've got to be careful where you leave something like this! You're lucky I found it before Gary did, believe me. I'll drop it off at your mom's house when I'm finished mowing the reserve. You owe me big time.

Tracey

PS: Your secret's safe with me.

Too late, Ashy-boy! Thought I was gone, didn't you? Quality read, I've gotta say – honestly didn't think you had it in you! I can think of one other person who'd just DIE to see this, eh?

You're welcome,

Gary

Message sent 19:41pm

To: Ash

Subject:

You're an idiot, Ash Ketchum, and Gary's an ass for emailing this to me. But…I'm so glad he did. Be sure to check your mail before you leave tomorrow, ok?

From Misty xxx

PS: I love you too, Mr. Pokémon Master.