AN: Well, inspiration bit me when I was led to the MNS anniversary fanfic
contest and this is the result. This fic contains a blend of details from
both the Japanese anime and manga so it's a mix of both. Forgive any OOC
since it's been a long while since I delved into the CCS fandom and,
besides, time has passed in the fic so characters have grown and its
allowed that they be a little different.
Hope you enjoy! (^^)
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"I'm home!"
At the sound of the familiar voice, Yukito's ears perked up as he paused in the act of preparing a late dinner. He waited patiently and, sure enough, a dark-haired figure soon appeared at the threshold of the kitchen. It was all a very familiar routine.
"Welcome home, Touya," Yukito greeted cheerfully. Then he noticed with some concern the expression on the other's face. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
Yukito blinked at the low growl that seemed to underlie that one word as Touya scowled while he pulled out a chair at the kitchen table and settled himself into it with a grumpy motion. At the disgruntled lines on Touya's face, Yukito abandoned the idea of continuing with dinner preparations until he got to the bottom of his live-in boyfriend's current bad mood. It was only a short moment before Yukito was also seated at the table across from Touya.
"What happened?" Yukito asked softly, encouraging Touya to speak.
He just frowned and shook his head.
"Touya?"
He finally sighed. "It's Sakura."
"What?" Yukito instantly grew alarmed. "What happened to her?"
"Calm down. Nothing's happened to her. Not really." He tilted his head. "I didn't mean to alarm you like that. Sorry"
Yukito relaxed a little though he was still concerned. "Then what is it?"
"She got a call from that brat." The scowl returned full force. "Dad mentioned it when I stopped by over there on my way home."
There was only one person who Touya called that. "From Li-kun?"
Touya just grunted in answer.
"Ah." Everything made more sense now. Still, it was somewhat puzzling. "But why are you so upset because of a phone call? What did he say to her?"
His expression turned grim. "He's getting married."
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The air was cool, carrying with it a nippy chill that came with nightfall. Ordinarily, he'd enjoy the feel of the night breeze as it rushed past him while the stars and moon overhead brightened with the deepening dark of the sky. But the usual pleasures of the night were absent for him as a sense of urgency washed over him as he journeyed to his destination, which he reached all too soon.
Despite the quickness of his descent, he landed softly upon the roof and simply stood there in silence as snowy white wings settled behind him. Now that he was here, he wasn't sure what he should do so he merely stood, waiting for an answer to come to him.
And it did.
A familiar incantation reached his ears as a sudden flood of light spilled from the window below him just before a whoosh of air stirred the air and she appeared in front of him, white wings parting the air and suspending her figure for a moment until she landed right beside him. Though he regarded her with some surprise, her face held none of that, only a welcoming smile and a hint of curiosity that lit her sparkling emerald eyes.
He asked the first thing that came to his mind - and felt immediately foolish after doing so.
"How did you know I was here?"
She looked amused. "I always know. You should know that by now."
He made a noncommittal sound, the only sign of his embarrassment.
It made her laugh good-naturedly. "There are some things that just never change about you, Yue."
He refused to respond to that statement with any comment whatsoever.
"So what is it that keeps you brooding out here?" she asked. "I waited for you to come in but, when you didn't, I decided to come to you instead."
He remained silent for a moment.
"Yue?"
It was that soft-voiced entreaty that enabled him to speak more than anything else could have. His voice was as equally as low when he said, "I heard from your brother what happened."
"Ah."
Her partially amused tone had him sliding her a curious glance. "You are not upset?"
"Why would I be?" Her expression was serene as she gazed up into the star- studded sky. "The past is the past. And since it's been a few years since I last saw him, it's very much in the past. Onii-chan worries too much."
"He cares about you."
"I know. But he tends to overdo it. I'm not a kid anymore - I'm eighteen!"
"Your brother will worry about you no matter how old you become."
"That's what I'm afraid of." She peered at Yue inquiringly. "How was Onii- chan when he talked about what happened?"
"He was not happy."
"Figures." She shook her head in exasperation. "Onii-chan really is overreacting to this too much. After all, the news isn't really all that surprising, not to me anyway so I don't think anyone else should be either. Ever since Syaoran-kun's mother called him back to Hong Kong and had him remain there for high school, it was inevitable that we'd grow apart. Though, truthfully, we'd already started to even before he was called back." She shrugged. "And Meilin's always loved him so it all worked out for the best. Besides," she looked at him askance, "why would I be upset over an old relationship when I have you?"
He glanced away.
"Yue," she sighed, her tone mixed with exasperation and humor. "Were you truly worried?"
"Perhaps."
"You know there's no reason to be. I've told you before, haven't I?"
"You have."
"Then you shouldn't have any more doubts." She stepped closer, raising a hand to smooth over the skin on one side of his face as he watched her intently. "After all we've been through together over the years, I thought you'd have more confidence in us."
"I do."
"Then why?"
"I am not human."
The faint tinge of sadness that colored those words brought an understanding light to her eyes and she quietly wrapped her arms about his waist in a comforting embrace, simply holding him as she rested her head briefly upon his chest. It was a familiar position, one they both drew strength from though, this time, she was the one offering it up to him. She didn't think he realized it but she needed the physical contact as much as he did. Though he never said anything to indicate his desire for touch, the slightly vulnerable look that crossed his features during such instances spoke clearly how much he needed it, no matter what his seemingly aloof persona appeared to imply.
She'd gotten to know his mind pretty well over the years and knew that it wasn't really the idea of some lingering affections she might still be harboring for Syaoran that bothered him and brought him here. No, Yue had a soft side that was much more sensitive than he let on and it was that part of him that worried that she needed something that he thought was better for her.
Something human.
She'd always sensed an insecurity that lay beneath Yue's cool demeanor, even when she was a little girl, and the reasons for it became more clear to her as she had grown older and gained more experience about the ways of the world and the people in it - including herself. After all, to be able to truly read the heart of another, a person had to know his or her own first.
It was something she had come to learn well.
It wasn't always easy, but she had gradually come to accept that love changes, evolves, and that what once was won't always be. And that's okay. Love at elementary school age isn't the same for an adult, and nor should it be. She would always treasure those memories, that pure and innocent love she'd held for Syaoran, but what she wanted and needed when she was a little girl wasn't what she desired as she grew older.
And that was the way things were supposed to be as maturity prepared her for something more complex. She wouldn't have been able to handle as a child what she had now so she was grateful to whatever power was out there that brought her to this point of her life where she was ready to take on the challenges that came with loving someone with so many layers to explore.
And Yue was certainly very complex.
Throughout her teen years, she had gradually found herself drawn more and more to him, to Yue, not Yukito. The two figures, despite the similarities in the basic kindness inherent within their natures, were always seen as distinct and different to her eyes. However, even so, she probably wouldn't have noticed her budding feelings towards her protector if not for some insightful comments by Tomoyo, and also Syaoran who, despite their deep history together, wanted her to be happy. Even Yukito, who had gotten to know his other self better after discovering he had one, had dropped a few hints veiled in such a way as not to alert the one who knew all that he did, though his comments had been too obscure to for her to figure out without some help from her other friends.
Friends were truly blessed things.
Thanks to them, her eyes had been opened and, never one to hold back for long when it came to her emotions, she had approached him one night when he'd seemed especially lonely and sad, to her other senses if not her eyes. Her heart had reached out to him then and had never let go since. It wasn't until later that he divulged that the reason for his loneliness had stemmed from thoughts of her.
Life was always full of surprises.
Who would have thought Yue would be harboring a secret love for her? She'd partly thought that he shared Yukito's feelings towards her brother.
Apparently, Yue had thought so too.
Well, with all the excitement that had been going on in those days, it was understandable that emotions could become confused in all the other turmoil that was occurring. She'd learned later that Yue, after a conversation with Eriol who was part of his beloved Clow Reed's reincarnation, had come to believe that the strong affection of Yukito towards her brother was tied to his own. It wasn't until a few more years had passed that he realized that it wasn't so, that he had his own emotions that traveled a different path than Yukito's. She suspected that believing his and Yukito's emotions were tied was a defense mechanism to prevent him from growing attached to the master of the former Clow Cards, and now Sakura Cards, and repeating old pains again, as well as to protect the child that was her who wasn't ready for the demands that being involved with his ageless self would require.
When she'd told him of her theory, he hadn't said much, but he hadn't disagreed either.
Well acquainted with his kindness, she knew that he would try not to make any difficult demands on a child, though his manner of going about it might have been subconscious. So he had distanced himself, resigning himself to the knowledge of the unrequited love that had grown within him until she had taken her courage in her hand and revealed to him that it wasn't so unrequited after all.
It was a good thing too because she doubted he would ever have taken up the aggressor's role in this particular instance. Though he wasn't the blushing type, there was a shyness within his soul that became more pronounced in situations where the more vulnerable emotions were involved. Then there were also the insecurities of his relationship with Clow Reed that lay upon him: the painful knowledge that his affections weren't returned quite as he had wished, the feelings of abandonment that came with how his previous master and creator had orchestrated events prior to and after his demise, having his powerful but mortal beloved one die and depart the earth while he remained behind in his immortality, the reality that that trusted person had manipulated private memories for a future end. With all of that, it was no surprise that he'd be hesitant when it came to expressing his emotions that left his heart bare.
But obstacles were meant to be overcome, so she did all in her power to see that they were.
She gave him the affection that he craved that no one else had ever been able to give him. She listened to him when he needed someone to, simply spent time with him whenever he wanted, and reassured him that she loved him just as he was.
And he did the same for her.
There were other things too. Though Yue really didn't desire all that much, what little he did, she wanted to fulfill. And with her powers still growing, she was now a little closer to granting one of his wishes.
He wanted to separate himself and Yukito.
She knew he cared about Yukito and disliked taking the time he might have spent with her brother. Since the two had separate desires, Yue wanted them to have separate bodies too. She could tell that Yue had Nakuru in mind with the way Eriol's creation could switch from human persona to true form while still maintaining the same sense of self - it was a quality he desired for himself but one he was unable to achieve currently without making Yukito, the false form he'd created who had taken a life of his own, disappear. So if Yue thought she was strong enough to do it, then she would, not just to make him happy but everyone else too.
Her brother would no doubt appreciate having Yukito around all the time too without worrying that he'd have to leave because Yue wanted to visited her. It was something she'd like too as she wanted to be able to spend time with Yue without being concerned that she was taking too much of Yukito's time away from her brother. And she knew Yue would also like that as well though there was another reason she had knowledge of behind why he wanted Yukito cast into a separate human form.
Yukito would be able to die.
Yue had gone through enough emotional anguish at having the one he loved die, being left behind with the knowledge that he would always have to endure the painful separation because he was eternal while mortals who he cared for were not. He didn't want Yukito to go through that, wanted him be secure in the knowledge that he'd be able to live and die with his beloved, and be able to be with him even after death to wherever departed souls that left the earth went to in the end.
It was the gift Yue wished to give to him and she would do whatever she could to make it happen.
"Uh-oh," she commented softly.
"What is it?"
"Nothing really." She drew back a little to look at him. "But if we stand out here any longer, someone's sure to notice two people with wings standing on my rooftop."
"There's no one around to see."
"Not yet, maybe, but it won't last and I don't want to push my luck. That's why I keep telling you not to stand out here for long whenever you drop by. What's wrong with using the door?"
"Flying is faster that walking. And I'm sure someone would be more likely to notice me landing on your doorstep than on the roof, Sakura-sama."
She gave a small huff of exasperation at logic of this discussion, which never seemed to having an ending point, as well as his use of her name. But Yue could be extremely stubborn at times in a way that might have made her proud if it weren't so frequently annoying to her. And there were times when she was positive he did it to deliberately annoy her although, even knowing him as well as she did, she couldn't always be completely sure with the composure that constantly cloaked him.
Well, at least 'Sakura-sama' was better than 'Mistress.'
"Anyway, we'd better get inside," she said. "Do you mind?"
He shook his head.
"Good." She released him, only to let out a startled gasp when she was suddenly swept up in his arms. "Yue, what are you doing?!"
"Carrying you." The slight curve of his lips was the only indication of his amusement. "Should I put you back down?"
"No," she said, blushing as she wound her arms around him for a more secure purchase.
The few times his playful nature decided to assert itself never failed to surprise her. Though she still considered them rare, they had become more frequent the closer they seemed to get, as if he allowed himself to relax enough to open up in such a way as his security in their relationship grew. Perhaps things were developing at a slow pace but, as she snuggled in his arms as he leapt off the roof with a sweep of wings, she was content with the way things were for she savored every moment.
It was almost a disappointment when he swept into her room through the window and deposited her back on her feet.
"I'll go get some tea." She smiled sweetly at him. "Wait right here?"
He nodded.
"Okay, I'll be back soon!"
She was back soon and carrying a small tray bearing tea, cups, and a covered bowl. She set it down on the floor, smiling up at him as she noticed his wingless state as he situated himself across from her. Her eyes twinkled with an excited light as she took the covered bowl from the tray and handed to him.
"What's this?" he inquired curiously.
"Your anniversary present."
"Anniversary?"
"You don't remember?" Her expression held the beginnings of disappointment. "This is the day that-"
"I know," he interrupted her softly as his features gentled. "It's the day we each discovered the other's feelings."
"You knew!"
"Would you prefer I didn't?"
"Well, no. But I thought you'd forgotten."
"It's an important day to me as well and not something I would just forget." There was a faint edge of humor to his tone. "I didn't just come over here simply because of what your brother said. Although that did put a different shade on my original intent to visit."
"Well, at least you came over." She pursed her lips. "If you hadn't, I was going to go over to Yukito-san and Onii-chan's place later on."
"Yes, I saved you a trip."
She shook her head at the way he'd teased her. Still, she liked that he was able to because it showed how comfortable he was in their relationship. And, though she wouldn't admit it to him because she knew it would embarrass him, she thought it was adorable. The sentiment made her lips curve upwards in a secret smile.
"Aren't you going to open your present?" she asked.
He did, curious to see what she'd given him. He lifted the lid and was immediately caught by the sparkling coming from within the bowl which was filled with dozens of multicolored star-shaped objects, each smaller than a sunflower seed as light twinkled prettily off of the many grains of sugar that coated it. They seemed to shimmer with an iridescent light that he'd never seen candy do before, like luminous stars in the sky that had been plucked and gathered into a bowl. And offered to him.
He looked at her. "You made this?"
"Yes." She smiled mischievously. "With a little help from the Sweet card. Do you like it?"
He nodded, eyes drawn back towards the twinkling contents of the bowl.
"I thought it was an appropriate gift since today's also marks the anniversary of the first time I coaxed you into actually eating something." She laughed a little. "And you have such a sweet tooth that I wanted to make you something special. It took me a few tries to get it right but I finally did and I've been waiting all week to give it to you."
"That long? I would have imagined Keroberos would have finished them off by now."
"Well, that's why I hid them in Dad's study. Kero-chan never goes in there." Her eyes twinkled. "Plus, I used the Shield card too, just in case."
He couldn't help being amused by that. "Where is he anyway?" He glanced around, partially expecting the other Usually he comes out as soon as anyone starts eating anything."
"At Tomoyo-chan's. She said she was experimenting with a new recipe so Kero-chan went over to 'help' taste-test. But she knows what day this is so I know she did it just to get Kero-chan away for the night so we wouldn't be bothered by him."
"I see."
"So." She looked at him expectantly. "Aren't you going to try one?"
He did. And was pleasantly surprised at the way one star candy instantly melted in his mouth in a wash of light sweetness that reminded him of her. His own special star who was his guiding light in whatever darkness happened to arise.
She smiled at the expression on his face. "You like?"
"Yes." He gazed at her and wondered what to say. She was the only one who ever gave him gifts. He settled for simply saying, "Thank you."
She looked at him warmly. "You're welcome."
"Now, I imagine it's time for me to give you your present."
"You got me a present?" she asked, a bit surprised.
"Yes. Could you please turn off the light?"
Curious, she went to do as he had asked and then returned to where he was standing by the window. She looked at him questioningly when she stopped beside him because she couldn't see him holding anything that might resemble a present. But then he cupped his hands and she watched with awe as they began to glow and a shape take form amidst that illuminating light. When the light receded, he was holding a simple chunk of crystal, a prism.
"For me?" she asked softly, reaching out a hand to take it.
"Yes." But instead of handing it over to her, he placed the crystal on the windowsill and told her softly, "Watch."
Puzzled, she did, only to gasp in surprise as the sitting crystal began to sparkle more and more, as if it were absorbing the star and moonlight streaming from the night sky above until it was too much for the crystalline form to hold in as the twinkling increased as if light trapped inside was trying to find a way out beyond that tiny body. And it did as the crystal continued to sparkle, sending illumination scattering across her room as small prismatic rainbows appeared, one after another, until the darkened interior was washed with tiny multi-colored lights that peppered the surface of everything. The sight was reminiscent of the effect sunlight could produce from streaming through prisms but this was so much more as there was only the one crystal doing all of this with the aid of night's natural light. It was beautiful, holding her in silent awe, and reminded her somewhat of the magical display she had created with the Maze and Illusion card at the school back when she had confessed her girlish crush to Yukito and chased after Clow Reed's presence. But the light show taking place in her room was done without the help of any card.
"Do you like it?"
The hint of uncertainty in his tone had her tearing her eyes away from the magical colored interior of her room to look at him, taking in the slight trace of vulnerability written upon his features as he waited for her answer. In response, her heart swelling with emotion, she threw her arms around him, nestling into him as she gazed up into his features and showed him with her open expression just how touched and delighted she was with his gift.
"I love it," she breathed. She wound her arm around him tighter. "Just like I love you."
The soft cast his normally cool features underwent at her response squeezed her heart and had her stretching on tiptoe to brush a kiss across his lips. She welcomed the tightening of his arms around her, drawing her closer, as the light scent of him, that brought to mind a mix of moonlight and rainbows, rose around her in a comforting cloak. Basking in the security she always felt when she was in his arms, she rested her head against his collarbone and sighed softly.
"You know," she said quietly, "I have another present for you too though it won't get here until later."
"Another present?" he asked questioningly.
She nodded. "Eriol-kun should be arriving soon. He'll let me know when he arrives."
He stiffened, casting her a wary glance. "Why is he returning?"
"Please, don't be like that," she chided softly. "I know he still makes you a little uneasy but I asked him to come. I'd like his help, or at least his opinion."
"With what?" There was concern now in his tone.
"I want to ask if he thinks I have enough power to perform the ritual that will give Yukito-san his own body. Since it's hard to judge these things across long distance with just a phone call, he's coming for a visit with Mizuki-sensei and the others." She looked up at him seriously. "I know you and Kero-chan think I can do it and I value your opinions, but this is too important for me to risk messing up. I want all the assurance I can get before I attempt it and I'll feel better after I get Eriol-kun's opinion. And if I need any help performing it, I'm sure he'll be able to help in other ways too." She gave him a concerned glance. "Is that okay?"
He inclined his head. "If that's what you think is best."
"I do."
His lips curved faintly. "It would have been more of a surprise if you had waited until he'd arrived first before telling me."
"I know. But it's good news and I was having a hard time keeping it to myself - just ask Tomoyo-chan." She laughed. "Fortunately, she's better at keeping secrets than me. Besides," she glanced at her rainbow colored room, "now seemed like the perfect time for making revelations." She smiled at him sweetly. "And if things go well, pretty soon we won't always have to worry about what time Yukito-san has to return home."
He let out a little sigh at the reminder. "I should be going now. Your brother will no doubt be waiting for him."
"Yes," she sighed, regretfully letting him go. But she gave him a bright smile. "But there's hope that in a little while, it won't be like this anymore and you'll be able to stay for as long as you want."
"That would be good."
"It definitely would be," she murmured as she watched him turn to go. Then she cried out suddenly, "Oh, wait!"
"What is it?" he asked, turning back towards her."
"Don't forget this." She handed him the covered bowl. "They're yours but, if they stay in this house any longer, Kero-chan will eventually find a way to make them his."
"How very true," he commented, cradling his precious gift as he regarded her softly.
When he kept staring at her, she became puzzled. "What is it?"
She let out a startled gasp when, in a rare burst of spontaneous motion, he leaned down and placed a quick kiss on her lips before drawing back to stare down into her surprised face.
"Thank you," he told her, a warm look in his eyes.
Then he was gone, leaving her standing behind, dazed and blushing as she stared after him. A soft smile crossed her features as a hand came up to touch tingling lips while tiny prismatic rainbows danced across the room, lighting the darkened interior, filled with memories of a wonderful anniversary and the promise of better things to come.
Hope you enjoy! (^^)
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"I'm home!"
At the sound of the familiar voice, Yukito's ears perked up as he paused in the act of preparing a late dinner. He waited patiently and, sure enough, a dark-haired figure soon appeared at the threshold of the kitchen. It was all a very familiar routine.
"Welcome home, Touya," Yukito greeted cheerfully. Then he noticed with some concern the expression on the other's face. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
Yukito blinked at the low growl that seemed to underlie that one word as Touya scowled while he pulled out a chair at the kitchen table and settled himself into it with a grumpy motion. At the disgruntled lines on Touya's face, Yukito abandoned the idea of continuing with dinner preparations until he got to the bottom of his live-in boyfriend's current bad mood. It was only a short moment before Yukito was also seated at the table across from Touya.
"What happened?" Yukito asked softly, encouraging Touya to speak.
He just frowned and shook his head.
"Touya?"
He finally sighed. "It's Sakura."
"What?" Yukito instantly grew alarmed. "What happened to her?"
"Calm down. Nothing's happened to her. Not really." He tilted his head. "I didn't mean to alarm you like that. Sorry"
Yukito relaxed a little though he was still concerned. "Then what is it?"
"She got a call from that brat." The scowl returned full force. "Dad mentioned it when I stopped by over there on my way home."
There was only one person who Touya called that. "From Li-kun?"
Touya just grunted in answer.
"Ah." Everything made more sense now. Still, it was somewhat puzzling. "But why are you so upset because of a phone call? What did he say to her?"
His expression turned grim. "He's getting married."
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The air was cool, carrying with it a nippy chill that came with nightfall. Ordinarily, he'd enjoy the feel of the night breeze as it rushed past him while the stars and moon overhead brightened with the deepening dark of the sky. But the usual pleasures of the night were absent for him as a sense of urgency washed over him as he journeyed to his destination, which he reached all too soon.
Despite the quickness of his descent, he landed softly upon the roof and simply stood there in silence as snowy white wings settled behind him. Now that he was here, he wasn't sure what he should do so he merely stood, waiting for an answer to come to him.
And it did.
A familiar incantation reached his ears as a sudden flood of light spilled from the window below him just before a whoosh of air stirred the air and she appeared in front of him, white wings parting the air and suspending her figure for a moment until she landed right beside him. Though he regarded her with some surprise, her face held none of that, only a welcoming smile and a hint of curiosity that lit her sparkling emerald eyes.
He asked the first thing that came to his mind - and felt immediately foolish after doing so.
"How did you know I was here?"
She looked amused. "I always know. You should know that by now."
He made a noncommittal sound, the only sign of his embarrassment.
It made her laugh good-naturedly. "There are some things that just never change about you, Yue."
He refused to respond to that statement with any comment whatsoever.
"So what is it that keeps you brooding out here?" she asked. "I waited for you to come in but, when you didn't, I decided to come to you instead."
He remained silent for a moment.
"Yue?"
It was that soft-voiced entreaty that enabled him to speak more than anything else could have. His voice was as equally as low when he said, "I heard from your brother what happened."
"Ah."
Her partially amused tone had him sliding her a curious glance. "You are not upset?"
"Why would I be?" Her expression was serene as she gazed up into the star- studded sky. "The past is the past. And since it's been a few years since I last saw him, it's very much in the past. Onii-chan worries too much."
"He cares about you."
"I know. But he tends to overdo it. I'm not a kid anymore - I'm eighteen!"
"Your brother will worry about you no matter how old you become."
"That's what I'm afraid of." She peered at Yue inquiringly. "How was Onii- chan when he talked about what happened?"
"He was not happy."
"Figures." She shook her head in exasperation. "Onii-chan really is overreacting to this too much. After all, the news isn't really all that surprising, not to me anyway so I don't think anyone else should be either. Ever since Syaoran-kun's mother called him back to Hong Kong and had him remain there for high school, it was inevitable that we'd grow apart. Though, truthfully, we'd already started to even before he was called back." She shrugged. "And Meilin's always loved him so it all worked out for the best. Besides," she looked at him askance, "why would I be upset over an old relationship when I have you?"
He glanced away.
"Yue," she sighed, her tone mixed with exasperation and humor. "Were you truly worried?"
"Perhaps."
"You know there's no reason to be. I've told you before, haven't I?"
"You have."
"Then you shouldn't have any more doubts." She stepped closer, raising a hand to smooth over the skin on one side of his face as he watched her intently. "After all we've been through together over the years, I thought you'd have more confidence in us."
"I do."
"Then why?"
"I am not human."
The faint tinge of sadness that colored those words brought an understanding light to her eyes and she quietly wrapped her arms about his waist in a comforting embrace, simply holding him as she rested her head briefly upon his chest. It was a familiar position, one they both drew strength from though, this time, she was the one offering it up to him. She didn't think he realized it but she needed the physical contact as much as he did. Though he never said anything to indicate his desire for touch, the slightly vulnerable look that crossed his features during such instances spoke clearly how much he needed it, no matter what his seemingly aloof persona appeared to imply.
She'd gotten to know his mind pretty well over the years and knew that it wasn't really the idea of some lingering affections she might still be harboring for Syaoran that bothered him and brought him here. No, Yue had a soft side that was much more sensitive than he let on and it was that part of him that worried that she needed something that he thought was better for her.
Something human.
She'd always sensed an insecurity that lay beneath Yue's cool demeanor, even when she was a little girl, and the reasons for it became more clear to her as she had grown older and gained more experience about the ways of the world and the people in it - including herself. After all, to be able to truly read the heart of another, a person had to know his or her own first.
It was something she had come to learn well.
It wasn't always easy, but she had gradually come to accept that love changes, evolves, and that what once was won't always be. And that's okay. Love at elementary school age isn't the same for an adult, and nor should it be. She would always treasure those memories, that pure and innocent love she'd held for Syaoran, but what she wanted and needed when she was a little girl wasn't what she desired as she grew older.
And that was the way things were supposed to be as maturity prepared her for something more complex. She wouldn't have been able to handle as a child what she had now so she was grateful to whatever power was out there that brought her to this point of her life where she was ready to take on the challenges that came with loving someone with so many layers to explore.
And Yue was certainly very complex.
Throughout her teen years, she had gradually found herself drawn more and more to him, to Yue, not Yukito. The two figures, despite the similarities in the basic kindness inherent within their natures, were always seen as distinct and different to her eyes. However, even so, she probably wouldn't have noticed her budding feelings towards her protector if not for some insightful comments by Tomoyo, and also Syaoran who, despite their deep history together, wanted her to be happy. Even Yukito, who had gotten to know his other self better after discovering he had one, had dropped a few hints veiled in such a way as not to alert the one who knew all that he did, though his comments had been too obscure to for her to figure out without some help from her other friends.
Friends were truly blessed things.
Thanks to them, her eyes had been opened and, never one to hold back for long when it came to her emotions, she had approached him one night when he'd seemed especially lonely and sad, to her other senses if not her eyes. Her heart had reached out to him then and had never let go since. It wasn't until later that he divulged that the reason for his loneliness had stemmed from thoughts of her.
Life was always full of surprises.
Who would have thought Yue would be harboring a secret love for her? She'd partly thought that he shared Yukito's feelings towards her brother.
Apparently, Yue had thought so too.
Well, with all the excitement that had been going on in those days, it was understandable that emotions could become confused in all the other turmoil that was occurring. She'd learned later that Yue, after a conversation with Eriol who was part of his beloved Clow Reed's reincarnation, had come to believe that the strong affection of Yukito towards her brother was tied to his own. It wasn't until a few more years had passed that he realized that it wasn't so, that he had his own emotions that traveled a different path than Yukito's. She suspected that believing his and Yukito's emotions were tied was a defense mechanism to prevent him from growing attached to the master of the former Clow Cards, and now Sakura Cards, and repeating old pains again, as well as to protect the child that was her who wasn't ready for the demands that being involved with his ageless self would require.
When she'd told him of her theory, he hadn't said much, but he hadn't disagreed either.
Well acquainted with his kindness, she knew that he would try not to make any difficult demands on a child, though his manner of going about it might have been subconscious. So he had distanced himself, resigning himself to the knowledge of the unrequited love that had grown within him until she had taken her courage in her hand and revealed to him that it wasn't so unrequited after all.
It was a good thing too because she doubted he would ever have taken up the aggressor's role in this particular instance. Though he wasn't the blushing type, there was a shyness within his soul that became more pronounced in situations where the more vulnerable emotions were involved. Then there were also the insecurities of his relationship with Clow Reed that lay upon him: the painful knowledge that his affections weren't returned quite as he had wished, the feelings of abandonment that came with how his previous master and creator had orchestrated events prior to and after his demise, having his powerful but mortal beloved one die and depart the earth while he remained behind in his immortality, the reality that that trusted person had manipulated private memories for a future end. With all of that, it was no surprise that he'd be hesitant when it came to expressing his emotions that left his heart bare.
But obstacles were meant to be overcome, so she did all in her power to see that they were.
She gave him the affection that he craved that no one else had ever been able to give him. She listened to him when he needed someone to, simply spent time with him whenever he wanted, and reassured him that she loved him just as he was.
And he did the same for her.
There were other things too. Though Yue really didn't desire all that much, what little he did, she wanted to fulfill. And with her powers still growing, she was now a little closer to granting one of his wishes.
He wanted to separate himself and Yukito.
She knew he cared about Yukito and disliked taking the time he might have spent with her brother. Since the two had separate desires, Yue wanted them to have separate bodies too. She could tell that Yue had Nakuru in mind with the way Eriol's creation could switch from human persona to true form while still maintaining the same sense of self - it was a quality he desired for himself but one he was unable to achieve currently without making Yukito, the false form he'd created who had taken a life of his own, disappear. So if Yue thought she was strong enough to do it, then she would, not just to make him happy but everyone else too.
Her brother would no doubt appreciate having Yukito around all the time too without worrying that he'd have to leave because Yue wanted to visited her. It was something she'd like too as she wanted to be able to spend time with Yue without being concerned that she was taking too much of Yukito's time away from her brother. And she knew Yue would also like that as well though there was another reason she had knowledge of behind why he wanted Yukito cast into a separate human form.
Yukito would be able to die.
Yue had gone through enough emotional anguish at having the one he loved die, being left behind with the knowledge that he would always have to endure the painful separation because he was eternal while mortals who he cared for were not. He didn't want Yukito to go through that, wanted him be secure in the knowledge that he'd be able to live and die with his beloved, and be able to be with him even after death to wherever departed souls that left the earth went to in the end.
It was the gift Yue wished to give to him and she would do whatever she could to make it happen.
"Uh-oh," she commented softly.
"What is it?"
"Nothing really." She drew back a little to look at him. "But if we stand out here any longer, someone's sure to notice two people with wings standing on my rooftop."
"There's no one around to see."
"Not yet, maybe, but it won't last and I don't want to push my luck. That's why I keep telling you not to stand out here for long whenever you drop by. What's wrong with using the door?"
"Flying is faster that walking. And I'm sure someone would be more likely to notice me landing on your doorstep than on the roof, Sakura-sama."
She gave a small huff of exasperation at logic of this discussion, which never seemed to having an ending point, as well as his use of her name. But Yue could be extremely stubborn at times in a way that might have made her proud if it weren't so frequently annoying to her. And there were times when she was positive he did it to deliberately annoy her although, even knowing him as well as she did, she couldn't always be completely sure with the composure that constantly cloaked him.
Well, at least 'Sakura-sama' was better than 'Mistress.'
"Anyway, we'd better get inside," she said. "Do you mind?"
He shook his head.
"Good." She released him, only to let out a startled gasp when she was suddenly swept up in his arms. "Yue, what are you doing?!"
"Carrying you." The slight curve of his lips was the only indication of his amusement. "Should I put you back down?"
"No," she said, blushing as she wound her arms around him for a more secure purchase.
The few times his playful nature decided to assert itself never failed to surprise her. Though she still considered them rare, they had become more frequent the closer they seemed to get, as if he allowed himself to relax enough to open up in such a way as his security in their relationship grew. Perhaps things were developing at a slow pace but, as she snuggled in his arms as he leapt off the roof with a sweep of wings, she was content with the way things were for she savored every moment.
It was almost a disappointment when he swept into her room through the window and deposited her back on her feet.
"I'll go get some tea." She smiled sweetly at him. "Wait right here?"
He nodded.
"Okay, I'll be back soon!"
She was back soon and carrying a small tray bearing tea, cups, and a covered bowl. She set it down on the floor, smiling up at him as she noticed his wingless state as he situated himself across from her. Her eyes twinkled with an excited light as she took the covered bowl from the tray and handed to him.
"What's this?" he inquired curiously.
"Your anniversary present."
"Anniversary?"
"You don't remember?" Her expression held the beginnings of disappointment. "This is the day that-"
"I know," he interrupted her softly as his features gentled. "It's the day we each discovered the other's feelings."
"You knew!"
"Would you prefer I didn't?"
"Well, no. But I thought you'd forgotten."
"It's an important day to me as well and not something I would just forget." There was a faint edge of humor to his tone. "I didn't just come over here simply because of what your brother said. Although that did put a different shade on my original intent to visit."
"Well, at least you came over." She pursed her lips. "If you hadn't, I was going to go over to Yukito-san and Onii-chan's place later on."
"Yes, I saved you a trip."
She shook her head at the way he'd teased her. Still, she liked that he was able to because it showed how comfortable he was in their relationship. And, though she wouldn't admit it to him because she knew it would embarrass him, she thought it was adorable. The sentiment made her lips curve upwards in a secret smile.
"Aren't you going to open your present?" she asked.
He did, curious to see what she'd given him. He lifted the lid and was immediately caught by the sparkling coming from within the bowl which was filled with dozens of multicolored star-shaped objects, each smaller than a sunflower seed as light twinkled prettily off of the many grains of sugar that coated it. They seemed to shimmer with an iridescent light that he'd never seen candy do before, like luminous stars in the sky that had been plucked and gathered into a bowl. And offered to him.
He looked at her. "You made this?"
"Yes." She smiled mischievously. "With a little help from the Sweet card. Do you like it?"
He nodded, eyes drawn back towards the twinkling contents of the bowl.
"I thought it was an appropriate gift since today's also marks the anniversary of the first time I coaxed you into actually eating something." She laughed a little. "And you have such a sweet tooth that I wanted to make you something special. It took me a few tries to get it right but I finally did and I've been waiting all week to give it to you."
"That long? I would have imagined Keroberos would have finished them off by now."
"Well, that's why I hid them in Dad's study. Kero-chan never goes in there." Her eyes twinkled. "Plus, I used the Shield card too, just in case."
He couldn't help being amused by that. "Where is he anyway?" He glanced around, partially expecting the other Usually he comes out as soon as anyone starts eating anything."
"At Tomoyo-chan's. She said she was experimenting with a new recipe so Kero-chan went over to 'help' taste-test. But she knows what day this is so I know she did it just to get Kero-chan away for the night so we wouldn't be bothered by him."
"I see."
"So." She looked at him expectantly. "Aren't you going to try one?"
He did. And was pleasantly surprised at the way one star candy instantly melted in his mouth in a wash of light sweetness that reminded him of her. His own special star who was his guiding light in whatever darkness happened to arise.
She smiled at the expression on his face. "You like?"
"Yes." He gazed at her and wondered what to say. She was the only one who ever gave him gifts. He settled for simply saying, "Thank you."
She looked at him warmly. "You're welcome."
"Now, I imagine it's time for me to give you your present."
"You got me a present?" she asked, a bit surprised.
"Yes. Could you please turn off the light?"
Curious, she went to do as he had asked and then returned to where he was standing by the window. She looked at him questioningly when she stopped beside him because she couldn't see him holding anything that might resemble a present. But then he cupped his hands and she watched with awe as they began to glow and a shape take form amidst that illuminating light. When the light receded, he was holding a simple chunk of crystal, a prism.
"For me?" she asked softly, reaching out a hand to take it.
"Yes." But instead of handing it over to her, he placed the crystal on the windowsill and told her softly, "Watch."
Puzzled, she did, only to gasp in surprise as the sitting crystal began to sparkle more and more, as if it were absorbing the star and moonlight streaming from the night sky above until it was too much for the crystalline form to hold in as the twinkling increased as if light trapped inside was trying to find a way out beyond that tiny body. And it did as the crystal continued to sparkle, sending illumination scattering across her room as small prismatic rainbows appeared, one after another, until the darkened interior was washed with tiny multi-colored lights that peppered the surface of everything. The sight was reminiscent of the effect sunlight could produce from streaming through prisms but this was so much more as there was only the one crystal doing all of this with the aid of night's natural light. It was beautiful, holding her in silent awe, and reminded her somewhat of the magical display she had created with the Maze and Illusion card at the school back when she had confessed her girlish crush to Yukito and chased after Clow Reed's presence. But the light show taking place in her room was done without the help of any card.
"Do you like it?"
The hint of uncertainty in his tone had her tearing her eyes away from the magical colored interior of her room to look at him, taking in the slight trace of vulnerability written upon his features as he waited for her answer. In response, her heart swelling with emotion, she threw her arms around him, nestling into him as she gazed up into his features and showed him with her open expression just how touched and delighted she was with his gift.
"I love it," she breathed. She wound her arm around him tighter. "Just like I love you."
The soft cast his normally cool features underwent at her response squeezed her heart and had her stretching on tiptoe to brush a kiss across his lips. She welcomed the tightening of his arms around her, drawing her closer, as the light scent of him, that brought to mind a mix of moonlight and rainbows, rose around her in a comforting cloak. Basking in the security she always felt when she was in his arms, she rested her head against his collarbone and sighed softly.
"You know," she said quietly, "I have another present for you too though it won't get here until later."
"Another present?" he asked questioningly.
She nodded. "Eriol-kun should be arriving soon. He'll let me know when he arrives."
He stiffened, casting her a wary glance. "Why is he returning?"
"Please, don't be like that," she chided softly. "I know he still makes you a little uneasy but I asked him to come. I'd like his help, or at least his opinion."
"With what?" There was concern now in his tone.
"I want to ask if he thinks I have enough power to perform the ritual that will give Yukito-san his own body. Since it's hard to judge these things across long distance with just a phone call, he's coming for a visit with Mizuki-sensei and the others." She looked up at him seriously. "I know you and Kero-chan think I can do it and I value your opinions, but this is too important for me to risk messing up. I want all the assurance I can get before I attempt it and I'll feel better after I get Eriol-kun's opinion. And if I need any help performing it, I'm sure he'll be able to help in other ways too." She gave him a concerned glance. "Is that okay?"
He inclined his head. "If that's what you think is best."
"I do."
His lips curved faintly. "It would have been more of a surprise if you had waited until he'd arrived first before telling me."
"I know. But it's good news and I was having a hard time keeping it to myself - just ask Tomoyo-chan." She laughed. "Fortunately, she's better at keeping secrets than me. Besides," she glanced at her rainbow colored room, "now seemed like the perfect time for making revelations." She smiled at him sweetly. "And if things go well, pretty soon we won't always have to worry about what time Yukito-san has to return home."
He let out a little sigh at the reminder. "I should be going now. Your brother will no doubt be waiting for him."
"Yes," she sighed, regretfully letting him go. But she gave him a bright smile. "But there's hope that in a little while, it won't be like this anymore and you'll be able to stay for as long as you want."
"That would be good."
"It definitely would be," she murmured as she watched him turn to go. Then she cried out suddenly, "Oh, wait!"
"What is it?" he asked, turning back towards her."
"Don't forget this." She handed him the covered bowl. "They're yours but, if they stay in this house any longer, Kero-chan will eventually find a way to make them his."
"How very true," he commented, cradling his precious gift as he regarded her softly.
When he kept staring at her, she became puzzled. "What is it?"
She let out a startled gasp when, in a rare burst of spontaneous motion, he leaned down and placed a quick kiss on her lips before drawing back to stare down into her surprised face.
"Thank you," he told her, a warm look in his eyes.
Then he was gone, leaving her standing behind, dazed and blushing as she stared after him. A soft smile crossed her features as a hand came up to touch tingling lips while tiny prismatic rainbows danced across the room, lighting the darkened interior, filled with memories of a wonderful anniversary and the promise of better things to come.