Author's Note: This story is heavily indebted to Siege Perilous and LoudAutomata16's story Archetypal. It made me interested in writing my own superhero Lori(coln) – interested enough to make an account here, haha. I've only written two chapters so far, but hopefully I can write the rest in a timely fashion.

In any other city in any other country on Earth, the sight of a young woman soaring through the air might have been considered shocking. Life-changing, even. But to the residents of Royal Woods, Michigan, all it inspired was a few moments of clapping and cheering before everyone carried on with their lives.

But Lori Loud still remembered the first time she had taken flight over her town; she remembered how the people gawked and fainted and re-evaluated everything they had ever known to be true. And as she flew to her destination, she allowed herself a small chuckle, remembering the faces people had made the first time they saw her.

"Okay," she then said, "now it's time to focus again."

It had been months – six or seven, she couldn't remember exactly – since she first became Power Woman and dedicated herself to the fight against evil. The first few times, she had worn nothing but a cheap mask with her regular school clothes, but now she had a signature costume: a tight-fitting white leotard with a cut-out right above her boobs, fixed with a long flowing cape, blue gloves, and nigh-transparent leggings that showed off her wonderfully long, smooth legs.

The costume came courtesy of Leni, of course – one of only two people who knew about her secret double-life. The other, Lisa, had been the one responsible for the chemical accident that gave Lori her powers.

And as much as Lori would've liked to reminisce, she needed to focus; she was getting closer to her destination.

She could tell because the screams of frightened children were getting louder in her super-sensitive ears.

Her body turned into a multicolored blur as she accelerated towards the noise. Her eagle eyes landed on a large yellow school bus at the side of a bridge, threatening to fall into the waters below. Using X-Ray vision, she could see the bus driver passed out at the wheel, as well as the legions of elementary schoolchildren crying out for someone to save them.

Hang on tight, kids, Lori thought as she grit her teeth in determination.

Just as the bus started to tip over and the children's screams reached their crescendo, Lori swooped down between the lake and the bus and threw up her arms. The front of the bus fell into her palms, and using her Herculean strength, she lifted the bus into the air above.

She smiled as she heard the children cheering for her.

She gently lowered herself to the road, setting the bus down gingerly. She went to the doors and tore them off like they were made of paper. She stepped into the bus and looked at the children.

"Is everyone alright?" she asked.

"We're okay, Miss Power Woman," they responded in unison. The ones that could talk, at least. Some poor children were still crying.

Lori ushered them all out of the bus, then turned to the still-unconscious bus driver with furious eyes. "What's wrong with you?!" she shouted at him. She stomped over, every step shaking the entire city. "You almost got those kids...killed?"

She blinked in surprise when she saw something poking out of his neck. She reached over and plucked it out. Her eyes widened with she saw that it was a dart, dripping with tranquilizer.

"What the—"

Before she could finish, something strong punched her in the stomach and threw her out the bus.

She looked up and watched as a man walked off the bus, slowly materializing with every step. Lori cursed herself for being so stupid; she should've checked for invisible people with her X-Ray the moment she saw the dart.

"Endangering the lives of all these kids just to get to me?" Lori growled. "That's low, even for a poacher like you, Camo-Man."

When Camo-Man came into full visibility, he shook his head. "Not poacher, Power Woman," he said. "I prefer the term...collector."

Lori narrowed her eyes. Whatever he wanted to call himself, Camo-Man was a dangerous foe. A 7 foot tall giant, dressed from head to toe in lime green camouflage gear that could turn him invisible and armed with more weapons than any one person should have been able to carry, he was dangerous indeed. In his youth, he had been a trophy hunting prick, but now he wanted something more than the stuffed heads of bears and the ivory tusks of elephants to mount his wall.

He wanted her.

He reached to his belt and pulled out a long hunting knife and lunged for her. Thankfully, the knife shattered into metallic debris as it hit Lori's tough arm, but he had taken her moment of distraction as a chance to punt her in the stomach. Lori was knocked back slightly, but the next time he tried it, Lori caught his leg in her hands.

"So tell me why I literally shouldn't fry you with my heat vision right now?" asked Lori.

Camo-Man didn't answer. Instead, he swiftly reached into another of his pockets and tossed its contents into Lori's eyes.

Its contents being a highly concentrated mix of sand, pepper, and magnesium.

Lori howled in pain as she let go off her enemy's foot and reached up to rub both of her teary eyes. Camo-Man laughed arrogantly.

"I have you now, Power Woman!" he shouted. "Your almighty heat vision is no more!"

"Oh yeah?" Lori shouted back. "Good thing I don't need it then."

"What's that?"

Lori's partially-exposed chest expanded as she inhaled as much air as her lungs could hold. Then, like the Big Bad Wolf of fairy tales, she blew onto her adversary.

By the time the thought of dodging occurred to Camo-Man, he was already frozen in a mountain's worth of ice.

Smirking, Lori knocked on the human-popsicle's ice sheath. "I literally learned how to do that just three days ago."

Her ears twitched as she heard police sirens approaching. She stood and patiently waited as two police cars drove up to the scene. A squat officer stepped out of one of the cars. He looked around at the children, the bus, the superheroine, and the burly hunter trapped in ice.

He sighed. "I miss the old days when crime was just gas stations getting robbed."

Lori could only smile politely and shrug.

After a long while of talking to the police, talking to the local media, signing autographs, and pretending to not notice all the eyes leering at her large boobs, Lori took off to a round of applause and thanks. She couldn't help but blush at the adoration her fellow citizens were showering her with.

But it's not really you they're praising, is it? They're praising Power Woman, not Lori Loud.

"That's fine," she said to herself as she flew into the stratosphere. "I am Power Woman just like I am Lori Loud. Sure, Power Woman is more popular and has more followers on swiftypic, but...I won a short story contest! That's something! No, wait, Carol won that...like she always wins everything. Well joke's on her, I could turn her into a human pretzel whenever I feel like it. And besides, does it really matter if people don't know I'm Power Woman? It's not that big of a deal."

A beat passed.

"And I'm talking to myself. Nice."

Just before she went inside her home, she went into Lisa's bunker and put on her usual blue shirt, cargo pants, and pearl earrings. She got out of the bunker and crossed the lawn and driveway back to the front door.

"I wonder if Lincoln saw what I did today," Lori caught herself saying. Then she shook her head viciously. "I mean, yeah, him. And everyone else. I hope everyone saw what I did on the news. Heh."

She tried to ignore how hot her cheeks felt.

She opened the door and entered the Loud House. True to its name, it was as loud as ever. Noise crashed into Lori's super-powerful ears with the force of a jackhammer. Upstairs, she could hear Lily crying and the twins fighting over some thing or another. In the basement, Luna was setting the washing machine to be as loud as possible. And on this floor, Luan was testing a homemade comedy noise machine while one of Lucy's bats screeched at an irritating level.

Lori hunched over in pain. She covered her ears, then remembered her breathing exercises.

Come on, Lori, you can drown this all out. One, two, one, two…

She inhaled and exhaled until all the pain in her ear was gone.

When she looked up, she saw Luan looking at her curiously. "You okay, Lori?" she asked.

"Who, me? I'm literally fine, what are you even talking about?"

"Well, you looked like your ears were hurting—"

"You're imaging things. Now cut it out before I make you start hurting."

"Yes ma'am. You won't hear a thing from me anymore."

Lori groaned as Luan chuckled.

It wasn't dinnertime yet, so Lori decided to go upstairs and finish a little bit of her homework. As she went up, Lana and Lola fell in front of her as a writhing mess of wrestling limbs and angry shouts. Lori, being the responsible older sister that she was, reached down and pulled the two apart swiftly.

"Enough!" she said. "What are you two even fighting about?"

"Lola threw my snake out the window!"

"Only because it was sleeping in my teapot! It surprised me!"

"Don't call my snake an it, she's a she."

"It's disgusting and so are you!"

"Okay, that's it," said Lori. She pointed downstairs and said, "Lana, go get your snake from outside. Lola, when she comes back, I want you to say you're sorry."

"Make me," responded Lola. She stuck out her tongue for emphasis.

"YouhavenoideawhatIcouldmakeyoudo."

"What?"

"Nothing. Lynn!"

The sporty tomboy of the family stuck her head out from behind her door. "What's up?"

"Can you please make sure these two make up? I don't have time to deal with them."

A grin crossed her freckled face. "Aw yeah. Now I can test out some of team-building exercises. Lana, Lola, outside, we're going jogging around the house until we're redder than Redskins."

The three blondes gasped.

"What? Washington Redskins. It's a sport reference. You know, sports references, that's kinda my thing. Not my fault the team has a messed-up name."

Lori watched Lynn lead the young twins away. By now, her head was starting to pound, and she was just about ready to go to her room when she realized there was one sibling she had yet to check on.

She looked down the hall, to the lone door that had once hidden a linen closet but now hid an entire room.

She activated her X-Ray vision. She hoped Lincoln wasn't changing behind that door of his...but then again, she also hoped he was.

To her simultaneous relief and disappointment, he wasn't. Her sweet, wonderful, handsome white-haired brother was sitting on his bed fully clothed. He was sitting criss-cross with an expression of awe on his face as he stared at his laptop's screen. Lori shifted her vision, to see what was so interesting…

When she saw that she was on his screen, her cheeks flushed a magnificent shade of scarlet.

"W-wow...Lincoln's watching my battle with Camo-Man on the news."

Her heart pounded powerfully in her chest. A mix of pride and affection filled her bodacious bosom.

Homework could wait, she decided. She strode to her younger brother's room, never turning off her X-ray eyes. She knocked on the door, and watched him look up from his computer. "Come in," she heard him call out. With that invitation, Lori opened the door and smiled down on her brother.

"Hey twerp."

"Hey Lori. I was just watching Power Woman on the news." Lori was pleased to hear the excitement in his tone. "Do you know what she did today?"

"I literally have no idea," she fibbed.

"Oh man, it was so cool! So this bus is about to fall off the bridge, but then Power Woman comes in and she scoops it up and puts it down. And then she gets attacked by an invisible Camo-Man, and he almost beats her but then she goes all 'whoooooooosh' and he turns into a freaking ice sculpture!"

Lori chuckled; listening to Lincoln recount her exploits was one of the best parts of the job.

He sighed dreamily. "She's the best," he murmured.

"Is she? Would you say you...like her?"

"Well yeah I like her, she's a real superher—"

He noticed how she was smirking, and he realized what kind of "like" she was talking about.

His adorable face turned redder than a tomato. "N-Not like that," he feebly squeaked. "I mean, maybe...n-no, stop making fun of me, Lori!"

Lori snickered, and ruffled her brother's hair until it was a pastel mess.

"She is pretty, though," Lori started saying. "I wouldn't blame a growing boy like you for having feelings for her."

"Well I don't," he grumbled, his cheeks now more purple than red. If Lori squinted, she could see the blood in his vessels rushing to his face to cover for his fibbing and his obvious attraction to his superhero idol that was also his sister…

And as amused as she was by Lincoln's denial of his feelings for her, she couldn't pretend like it didn't sting slightly.

No, not slightly. A lot. It stung a lot.

"Okay then," she said. "I guess I'll stop bothering you now."

Lincoln blinked, confused. If he didn't know any better, he could swear he heard something in her tone that vaguely resembled hurt—

She closed the door after she left, and Lincoln could hear her stomp away.

Later that night, after everyone was done with the bathroom, Lori stepped in to brush her teeth. She closed the door and used her super-speed to clean her mouth. She spit in the sink and went straight to her room.

She tossed herself on the bed, and it broke underneath her.

She groaned.

"Is everything okay, Lori?" her sister and roommate Leni asked.

Lori grunted. Like a cavewoman.

Leni offered her a small, cute smile. "You know you can, like, talk to me if something's bothering you, right?"

She wasn't just being nice either—aside from Lisa, Leni was the only person who knew Lori was secretly a superhero, and being more emotionally receptive than their little sister, she was often the one who Lori turned to when the stress of her job got to be too much. Leni would sit there, nodding her head gently, as Lori unloaded all her problems on her in a verbal tsunami.

But then was different from now. Then Lori knew what was bothering her. Now...she wasn't entirely too sure.

Leni continued, "Is this about Lincy?"

Lori shot up out of bed with the speed of a bullet.

"What? No? Of course not," said Lori, her face reddening by the second. "Why would it be about that little twerp?"

Leni fixed her sister with a curious yet knowing smirk. "I know Lincy's been, like, totes into Power Woman recently. Maybe that's why you feel so weird."

"You're jumping to conclusions, Leni."

"I'm not jumping, I'm sitting in bed."

Lori rolled her eyes. She sometimes forgot how literally Leni interpreted figures of speech.

But metaphor-confusion aside, Leni may have been onto something. Lori had been having...mixed feelings about her brother recently. She was seeing him in a different light; she began noticing just how irresistibly cute he was, with his little chipped teeth and his white cowlick. But they were pure sisterly feelings, that was it.

But maybe that's why she was a little bothered by his fawning over Power Woman; he was fawning and impressed with her alter ego, not her. Lori was proud, but in a moment of weakness, she wasn't proud enough to deny that she wanted Lincoln to look at her the same way he looked at Power Woman. She wanted him to be enamored with his big sis, not some costumed stranger.

Boob window or not, they were still the same person, and they deserved the same adoration.

"Maybe you're right, Leni," Lori finally concluded.

"Yay!" Leni said, throwing her arms in the air. "I'm usually never right, so this is nice."

The older sister smiled. "Yeah, congratulations for this time."

"Oh, and don't worry, Lori. You're really, really smart...like one of the smartest people I know ever, aside from Lisa and Alan Musk. I'm sure you'll think of something to solve your little Linky problem."

"I'm sure I will." She turned over and turned off the glowing lamp at their side. "Well, good night Leni."

The younger girl yawned. "Good night Lori."

Within seconds, Leni was asleep. Lori envied how fast she could fall asleep. It usually took her hours to calm down her hyperactive cells and organs enough for her to close her eyes. And as much as she wanted to blame the superpowers, it was a problem she had had for a long time.

But now it was a blessing, since it gave her the chance to think about what she wanted to do next. She thought and thought and thought about the solution to her unique problem, and all the ways she could approach it.

She thought about Lincoln, then herself, then her Power Woman persona. Her heart sped every time his face skittered across her mind.

What could I do for Lincoln that would also be good for me? Come on, Lori, think, THINK!

Then it hit her. The perfect plan. Her eyes widened as her smile grew larger.

"That's it," she whispered to herself. "That's literally it."

Now content, she closed her eyes and flipped on her side, still beaming.

"Tomorrow, that little dork is finally going to have his first...celebrity meeting."