Deucalion was nowhere to be found.

Alan tried not to jump to conclusions. Deucalion hadn't said much the previous night, but it had been enough for Alan to believe that his change of heart was genuine. The bed in the spare room was neatly made though, and if Alan hadn't known better he would have sworn that no one had even spent the night.

There wasn't any danger. Alan was reasonably confident of that. But until he was absolutely certain he would rather not have the alpha wandering around Beacon Hills. He forced down his frustration with an effort; there was a lot he had to get done today. He needed to check on Marin, Scott, the twins, even Stiles and Allison in case the ritual had had adverse effects…

His thoughts were interrupted by the soft sound of a door opening and closing. Alan headed downstairs in time to see Deucalion taking a seat in the kitchen. The alpha glanced up as Alan joined him, but looked away quickly. He looked exhausted. Alan put the kettle on and leaned against the counter.

"You're up early."

There was a slight pause. "It's been a long time since I saw the sunrise."

Alan studied him. Deucalion's face was ashen and he was massaging his temples. Alan sighed and crossed to his medicine cabinet. "Did you sleep at all?"

"I had a lot to think about," said Deucalion quietly. He blinked when Alan set a steaming mug in front of him. "What-"

"It will help." He watched Deucalion with a frown, noting how he kept his back to the windows. "Is it the light?"

Deucalion's jaw tightened. He gave an abrupt nod and reached for the tea. Alan sighed. "It might improve with time."

Honestly, he couldn't say for sure. Alan had never heard of a werewolf experiencing difficulties like that, but then he had never heard of a werewolf having their eyes burned out and then supernaturally healed. He also couldn't imagine the Darach had taken much care in her healing if she had only wanted Deucalion to see his imminent death. Deucalion let out a long breath.

"It's worth it," he said quietly. He took a sip of the tea and looked up. "Thank you."

Alan nodded. He poured a second mug, and the two of them sat in silence for a long minute before Alan spoke again. "What are you going to do?"

Deucalion set his mug aside. "I still don't know. I don't know where to start." He let out a shaky breath. "But I cannot stay in Beacon Hills."

Alan frowned slightly. "Not even for the twins?"

Deucalion froze. When he spoke his voice was barely above a whisper, "The twins are alive?"

Alan stared at him, then understanding kicked in and he closed his eyes. "I'm sorry. I thought you knew." He shook his head. "Yes, they are alive. They were badly injured, and I don't know exactly what the consequences will be-"

"Where are they?"

Deucalion was on his feet, his face even more pale than before. Alan crossed the kitchen to join him "They didn't want to stay at the clinic. Lydia took them back to your apartment."

"I have to see them," said Deucalion. "Thank you, Alan."

"I'll come with you."

Deucalion was already halfway out the door, but glanced back over his shoulder. "Alan-"

"How long has it been since you last drove a car?" Deucalion faltered, and Alan nodded. "It'll be faster than even you running, and I need to see how they're getting on anyway. Come on."

Deucalion held his gaze for a moment, then the corner of his mouth twitched up. "Thank you," he repeated.

It was the last thing he said. He flinched when they stepped out into the bright sunlight but shook his head when Alan glanced at him. He still didn't speak as they drove through Beacon Hills, and Alan let himself think about the twins. They had been recovering well when he let them leave, but he was sure that being injured so severely in their combined form would have serious consequences. He would have to keep an eye on them.

From the looks of things he wouldn't be the only one. Deucalion's fingers were drumming a rapid tempo on his thigh. Scott had told him that Deucalion had been the one to find and teach the twins, but it was beginning to look like Deucalion's feelings ran deeper than that.

"They will be all right. Physically they should be fully healed by now.'

"That's not what I'm worried about," Deucalion murmured. He continued to stare out the window, but after a moment, to Alan's surprise, he continued, "I turned them into killers. I may have saved from the monsters that called themselves their family, but the way I used them…"

He trailed off, voice tight with self-loathing. Alan looked away from the road long enough to frown at him, but Deucalion was still turned away and Alan returned his attention to the road. Psychology wasn't his forte, as Marin was very fond of telling him, but he knew enough to be growing increasingly concerned. While he was glad that Deucalion was acknowledging his crimes and trying to atone for them, that much hatred could turn dangerous very quickly.

Alan suppressed a sigh. Maybe speaking with the twins would help. Either way he would have to be careful. The rest of the drive passed in silence.

Deucalion still didn't speak as they reached the apartment block. He stumbled slightly as he stepped into the sunlight again, but ignored Alan's frown and hurried inside without a word. Alan followed, making a mental note to check on Allison after, but pushed that to the back of his mind. Deucalion looked disorientated, and his fingers were twitching as if he missed his cane, but he made for the lift with only a slight hesitation. He continued to fidget in the lift until Alan couldn't help himself.

"They're fine, Deucalion. I wouldn't have let them leave if they were still in danger."

Deucalion started, then jerked his head in acknowledgement. "I know," he murmured. "That's not…"

He broke off abruptly and looked away, but that was enough. Alan sighed. "Give them a chance. Don't put words into their mouths before you've even seen them."

Deucalion gave him a slight smile. "Thank you, Alan," he said quietly. His hands flexed convulsively before he shoved them deep in his pockets. "This lift felt faster when I was blind."

Alan eyed him, but before he could offer any more advice the lift came to a halt and Deucalion was out like a shot. By the time Alan caught up he was inside the suite and looking around for the twins.

"Ethan? Aiden?"

There was a crash from one of the bedrooms. Deucalion shook his head, a fond smile spreading across his face, and moved to the door. Alan followed, and blinked at the chaos inside. Aiden scrambled over to them.

"Deucalion? Are you okay? We thought…"

He trailed off, but the relief on his and his brother's faces were obvious. Then their eyes widened in unison. "Wait, your eyes-"

"Can-can you see?" Ethan demanded.

Deucalion gave a slight smile. "Thanks to Derek Hale and Miss Blake." He looked the two of them over and his smile faded. "Are you both all right?"

The twins gave identical shrugs. "Thanks to Doc," said Ethan, with a nod at Alan.

"And Lydia," said Aiden.

Deucalion nodded, but a frown touched his face as he looked at the mess spread across the room. "What are you doing?"

Aiden and Ethan looked at each other, then away. "Packing," Aiden muttered. "Don't worry, we'll be leaving as soon as we're done."

Deucalion frowned. "Why would you leave?"

The twins exchanged another look. "We're not alphas any more," Ethan mumbled. "What Blake did…Something happened when we healed."

Alan frowned. He had been expecting consequences, but that was unexpected. Perhaps that had been the cost of their unexpected survival. Aiden's grip tightened on his helmet. "We don't belong in an alpha pack any more."

The bitterness was clear in his voice, but so too was the misery in the look he sneaked at Deucalion. Deucalion still hadn't moved, but when the twins started to turn back to their packing he sighed. "There is no alpha pack," he said quietly. "But you will have a place with me for as long as you want it."

Aiden dropped his helmet. The visor cracked on the floorboards, but both twins were too busy gaping at Deucalion to notice. Alan stepped back as quietly as he could. This wasn't something he should interfere with. Deucalion cast a quick glance at him before refocusing on the twins.

"I failed you," he said. Ethan started to open his mouth, but fell silent when Deucalion raised a hand. "I tried to build a perfect pack. One that would never betray me. Instead, I turned good people into killers, and left bodies everywhere I went."

"You saved us," Ethan protested. "Before you came along we were nothing!"

Deucalion flinched, but Aiden was nodding. "Our lives were hell," he agreed. "You're the one who changed that."

Deucalion's expression softened. "Ten years, and helping you two was the only good thing I did. The only thing I did that I don't regret." He shook his head. "But I still let you down. I hurt you, so many times and in so many ways, and I am sorry."

Ethan and Aiden continued to stare at him. Deucalion rubbed his eyes, but when he started to try again Aiden suddenly shook his head. "No. No. You only ever hurt us when we messed up."

Deucalion sighed. "I never should have hurt you at all," he insisted. "You both deserved better than that. A better alpha than that."

"Someone like Scott?" Ethan asked.

Alan tensed, but Deucalion just nodded. "He's a better man than I am. He will make a far better alpha than I ever did."

Ethan blinked. "I wasn't…What the hell is going on?"

Alan pinched the bridge of his nose. This could be going better. He was on the point of intervening when Aiden gave a frustrated snarl.

"Why are you being like this?" he demanded. "You said you wanted us to stay, but now you're telling us how horrible you are? Do you want us to leave you or something?"

Deucalion hesitated, but that was enough. Aiden drew back as if he had been struck, and Ethan flinched. Deucalion's expression turned mortified. "Aiden-"

"Save it," Aiden growled. "We'll get out of your way."

He grabbed his bag, but faltered when Alan stepped in his path. "Doc?"

"One minute, please," said Alan. "Deucalion is doing a terrible job of explaining this." He glanced at the alpha, but Deucalion looked too relieved to take offence. Alan rested a hand on Aiden's shoulder. "Sit down. Please."

Aiden dropped his bag and sat down on the bed, but he was still visibly fuming. Alan crouched in front of the twins. "Neither of you did anything wrong," he assured them. "He cares about you more than he would ever admit."

"Alan," Deucalion hissed, but though his ears blazed red he didn't refute the statement. Ethan gave him a tiny smile, but Aiden folded his arms.

"Then why's he trying to drive us away?"

"Because he's made mistakes," said Alan. "And he's terrified that he will make more."

That was what it came down to. Deucalion had slaughtered his first pack, and made a second out of mass-murderers. Alan could understand, and even approve of his need to do better, but the twins weren't seeing it like that. With their history it was understandable that they would see it as a rejection, and they had been through enough.

Deucalion looked like he would rather be doing anything else, but understanding was dawning in the twins' eyes.

"That's stupid," said Aiden flatly. "We all fuck up. Yeah, you might fuck up more than everyone else, but you're trying to do better."

Deucalion opened his mouth, but it was Ethan's turn and he was going to have his say. "We get it. We do. And yeah, you've messed up. But we trust you. We always have."

Deucalion opened his mouth, then closed it again. Alan rolled his eyes. "He doesn't want you to go anywhere," he said. "He needs you as much as you need him."

Deucalion glared at him, but his retort died at the visible hope in the twins' faces. Alan gave him a pointed look and Deucalion's shoulders slumped. "I do," he said softly. "But I also need you two to be safe."

The twins weren't the only ones to stare at him. Alan's eyebrows shot up, but it was Aiden who said what everyone was thinking. "Where's safer than with one of the strongest werewolves in the country?"

"Last night being in my pack almost killed you," Deucalion pointed out. "And it's not the first time."

"Yeah, but we're not gonna be doing that kind of stuff any more," Ethan pointed out. He exchanged a glance with his brother. "And with all the enemies we've made, being with you is still safer than anywhere else."

Deucalion's expression tightened. Alan frowned. He hadn't considered all the consequences of Deucalion's exploits. Aiden suddenly stiffened. "Unless your plan is to go off and draw all the danger yourself?"

Alan blinked, but the way Deucalion shifted confirmed it and he felt an unexpected spike of anger. "Deucalion…"

"It's my responsibility-"

"It's not your responsibility to get yourself killed!"

Deucalion said nothing, but there was a muscle twitching in his jaw. Both Ethan and Aiden had gone very pale, but a lot of things were falling into place and Alan didn't like what he was seeing. "But that's what you want, isn't it?" he said quietly. "You don't think you can make things right so you're going to kill yourself instead."

His words seemed to echo in the silent suite. Deucalion could have been carved from stone for all the emotion he displayed, but Alan could feel the tension building in the twins.

"So that's it?" Aiden demanded. "You're just gonna give up?"

"No," Deucalion began, but that was far as he got. Ethan stood up, face strangely blank, and punched him hard enough to send him flying into the wall.

"Ethan!"

Aiden grabbed his brother, while Alan went to Deucalion. The alpha was starting to sit up, eyes wide with shock and pain, but Ethan wasn't finished.

"What part of we need you do you not understand?" he roared. "What are you doing? You say you want us to be safe and you blame yourself for fucking up and so your answer is to kill yourself? What the hell is wrong with you?"

Deucalion realigned his jaw with a dull crunch. He was looking at Ethan like he had never seen him before. Alan rested a hand on his shoulder. "Do you want an impartial assessment?"

"I think I'm going to get one whether I want it or not."

"You're being a coward," said Alan flatly. Someone drew in a sharp breath behind him, but Alan kept his eyes on Deucalion. "You're realising how much work you have to do and you're scared that it'll never be enough and so you're going to give up and disguise it as protecting the very people who most need you to stay."

"What he said," said Aiden. He loomed over them, fists clenched. "You don't get to leave us and say it's for us."

Deucalion flinched. He looked from the twins to Alan and rubbed both hands over his face. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I didn't think."

"You always think," said Aiden flatly. "That's what you do."

Deucalion looked down. Alan moved back. He had said his piece. He suspected the twins could take things from here. Deucalion let out a shaky breath and pushed himself up from the floor. Aiden met his gaze defiantly, but Ethan was glaring at the floor. Deucalion shot a helpless glance at Alan, who just raised an eyebrow at him. If Deucalion was serious about making amends, then this would be the easiest of the tasks ahead of him.

Deucalion seemed to be thinking the same thing. He took a breath and looked at Ethan.

"I am sorry," he repeated. "I thought you would be better off without me, but really I still wasn't listening to what the two of you were saying."

"We know," Aiden muttered. "So what are you gonna do about it?"

Deucalion was silent for a long minute. His eyes darted between the twins, then he stepped forward and rested a hand on Ethan's shoulder. The younger werwolf blinked up at him, eyes wide with shock, and for the first time a small but genuine smile spread across Deucalion's face. The sight made Alan's breath hitch, and Deucalion reached out for Aiden with his other hand.

"I won't go anywhere," he promised. "Not unless you want me to."

Aiden snorted. "No chance of that. You're stuck with us."

But his eyes were very bright, and Deucalion staggered slightly as the two taller and stockier werewolves all but collapsed into his arms. Deucalion threw a slightly panicked glance at Alan, but Alan just smiled and closed the door as quietly as he could. His presence was clearly superfluous. He retreated to the main living area and dug his phone out his pocket. Marin answered on the first ring.

"Am I getting any waffles today?"

Alan glanced at the clock and winced. "Sorry. I'm with Deucalion." There was a sharp intake of breath, and he hastened to reassure her, "Everything is fine. Scott and Derek were right." The werewolves were preoccupied, but he lowered his voice anyway. "He is trying to change."

There was a long silence, then Marin let out a breath. "Are you sure?"

Alan glanced back at the door. He could hear a low murmur of intense conversation through the door, but there had been no further sounds of violence. "Yes."

"Then I want to see him."

It was Alan's turn to hesitate. "Are you sure?"

"Alan. Please."

Alan took a deep breath. He believed Deucalion was trying to make amends. He would be there. And ultimately it was Marin's decision. "I'll talk to him."

Now he could only hope that it went better than it did with Ethan and Aiden.

Thanks for reading! Any feedback would be appreciated.