EPILOGUE

"Can I hold her?"

Jaina glanced up from gently bouncing Keira in her arms to look into a pair of questioning green eyes. With some reluctance she offered a nod, then shifted her daughter in her arms. Two hands eagerly snatched the baby from her grasp; Jaina watched anxiously, looking for signs of distress from her baby. The whole day had been spent at the medical facility waiting for Doctor Tarado to complete a battery of tests in order to declare Keira one hundred percent healthy. Jaina's nerves were fried.

She grimaced as Keira's head flopped to the side and opened her mouth to make a suggestion when Jag beat her to the punch. "Briaun, make sure you support her head."

Jaina offered a weak smile to her husband, as Briaun spun back to face her brother. "Oh yeah. Sorry."

Briaun shifted Keira in her arms with Syal gently assisting to place the restless baby into an appropriate position. Syal winked at Jag. "Briaun did not have the benefit of a baby sister or brother to practice on like you, Jag."

Briaun proceeded to walk around the room, rocking her arms in an attempt to quiet Keira's fussiness. "I can't believe you couldn't wait two days until my winter break started, Miss Keira." The infant emitted a weak cry, which made Briaun grin. "Oh, smart talking already. You must have learned that from your mother."

Jaina tried to smile at the quip, but the effort was difficult. She wrung her empty hands nervously as she glanced from Briaun to Jag then back to Briaun. After all the requisite tests, Doctor Tarado had come back and taken Keira one more time. He had spoken to Jag in his native tongue causing her husband's face to flash with concern.

As he had wrestled Keira from her arms and handed their daughter to the doctor Jag had assured Jaina it was purely precautionary. Now Keira was back, so the Fel family waited for the results to some test Jag claimed he was not entirely sure of the purpose. Jaina knew he was hiding something by the uneasy set of his shoulders, even though he was unreadable in their bond.

As if sensing the tension in the atmosphere, Keira began to wail. Jaina, unable to stand the separation any more, walked to Briaun and gently scooped Keira up, laying the fussing baby against her shoulder. A caress in the Force did little to ease the cries. Jaina turned to Jag, her agitation reaching a boiling point.

"Are the test results going to be much longer? I really need to feed her."

Jag looked from Jaina to his parents, an unspoken exchange took place. Soontir walked out of the waiting room; Syal offered a comforting smile then walked across the room to Jaina. "I am sure it will not be much longer, dear. Soontir will stir them into action."

Jaina snapped, "Thanks," before eyeing Jag. She settled into a seat and dropped Keira onto her legs so she was nestled along the crook where they met. Bouncing her heels slightly, Jaina tried to soothe her daughter, while forcing a wide smile. The effort seemed to have the wrong effect as Keira's cries increased in volume. Jaina kept forcing herself to maintain a cheerful exterior despite the knot growing in her gut.

"May I try?"

Jaina raised her eyes to see Jag kneeling in front of her. His eyes were calm green pools; his voice solid and sure. Jaina felt some of her nervous edge soften. The slight curl of her lips had a hint of genuine relief at the sight of Jag's quiet confidence. Jag rubbed his thumb on Keira's forehead, and her cries subsided to quiet hiccoughs.

Soontir's voice broke the reverie. "Jag, the doctor is coming."

Jag reached across and placed a hand on Jaina's shoulder. "I will be right back."

He rose and strode to the hallway, meeting Doctor Tarado and another Chiss physician just outside the entrance to the waiting room. Jaina watched as the three men conversed for what seemed to be an eternity. Jag was a blank slate, falling back to his steely warrior demeanor. Jaina furrowed her eyebrows, but a cry demanded her attention.

Accepting that she would have to wait until the doctors completed their interview in a language she was unable to understand and at the same time faced with a reality she could change, Jaina swept the frustrated infant up in her arms as she rose. She bobbed Keira on her shoulder trying to sooth her baby's unrest. As it became evident her efforts were fruitless, Jaina proceeded to pace the back wall of the room as Syal, Soontir and Briaun took up residence in a row of seats to await the news.

At the point when the unknown was almost unbearable for Jaina, Jag and the doctors entered the room. Jaina spun to greet them, Keira mewing into her shoulder. There was a profound sadness in Jag's eyes, a sadness he could not hide despite his best efforts. He touched Keira briefly on the head, then stared into Jaina's eyes. He heaved in a breath, and the weight of the world hung in the balance.

"The doctors found something in their scans." Jaina's brown eyes darted from the doctors' serious faces back to Jag. "We knew there was a chance of some developmental problems resulting from the serum. Danni warned me before I told them to give it to you. I accepted the burden of the risk."

Jaina's eyes softened. Whatever was wrong, Jag blamed himself. She shifted Keira into one arm as she voiced her protest and reached for Jag's hand with her now unoccupied hand. Jag squeezed her slim fingers in gratitude.

"Danni warned me this might be a possibility. Jaina, Keira is blind."

Jaina dropped Jag's hand and spun around to face the back wall, clutching Keira to her chest in desperation. She tried to block out the rest of her husband's words, to deny the truth, but they kept coming. "The doctors said there may be ways when she is older to…"

Jaina fought back tears, clenching her eyelids shut. She closed out the world, silenced her eardrums except for the pounding of the blood in her head. Jaina failed to take a breath for she was not sure how long. Then she realized Keira was now full out balling, echoing the sentiments of her mother's heart.

Jaina inhaled, and with the action came a realization. Keira was alive; she was alive. That was a gift in and of itself. This journey had been a glorious adventure in self-growth, and Jaina had learned one thing, with the Force all things were possible. Mountains could be flattened to valleys, but it was the act of climbing the mountains that reaped the greatest gain.

Keira stopped crying as Jaina made her peace. Jaina bent her head down and placed a kiss on her precious daughter's forehead before turning to Jag. He stood silently waiting, the guilt of his heart now blaring full force. Jaina eyed the doctors and the rest of the family watching beyond them; Briaun cradled in Syal's embrace while Soontir stood stoically by their side. She stared into Jag's guilt-ridden eyes.

"So Keira won't see the world with the same eyes as we do, but she will see it. We are all blind to something, be it our weaknesses or the hand in front of our face. Everyone has a handicap or limitation, some are just more obvious than others. Keira will know the world in sounds and smells and touch and in the Force. I won't mourn her eyesight; I will rejoice in her life."

Jaina shifted Keira, holding their daughter out to Jag. His hands almost imperceptibly shook as he took her. Jaina put a hand on Jag's cheek. "Your choice didn't make her blind. You gave her life; you gave me life. What greater gift could we ask for?"

"But…"

Jaina's thumb silenced his reply. "No buts, only laughter and love and joy. No regrets, only living. Promise?" Her hand fell to his arm cradling Keira protectively.

Jag gazed into Jaina's eyes as she willed him to let go of his guilt. Finally, he accepted destiny. "I promise." He smiled. "I love you, Jaina Solo-Fel." He glanced down at his daughter now sleeping in his arms. "I love you, too, Keira Winter Fel."

Jaina understood her daughter's heart like it was her own. "We know."

The End
TKL/jj00/zr/h94