(AN: I soooooo do not feel like updating this story, but I am anyway! (throws confetti))
Crocker dashed through the dungeon hallway, yelling, "Charlotte! CHARLOTTE!"
"What is it, Denzel?" asked Charlotte in exasperation, turning around. Crocker grabbed her so tightly that both of them fell to the ground.
"I LOVE YOU!" he yelled.
Charlotte blinked.
"Uh, I mean…" Crocker searched for words. "Uh… I love you… a lot?"
"Whoa, hold the phone!" cried Charlotte.
Crocker pulled out his cell phone.
"You love me? But you just met me!" cried Charlotte. "I thought you hated me, and now suddenly you love me?" Charlotte scratched her head.
"Do you love me back?" asked Crocker, with the eagerness of a puppy.
"How am I supposed to know?" yelled Charlotte. "I just met you!"
"Poopy," said Crocker, pouting a bit.
"Look," muttered Charlotte, "let's just go get Castle and get out of here, okay?"
"Fine," said Crocker. "Then I can use her as proof of FAIRY GOD--Errrk!"
Charlotte grabbed Crocker by the shirt collar and led him out of the dungeons.
***
Tim and Terri, now humans, and Cosmo, Wanda, and Katie, now looking like humans, stood in front of the door at the evil lair. Tim tugged at the door. "It's locked," he said. "How are we supposed to get in?"
Cosmo, Wanda, and Katie held up their wands, with a "no duh" look on their faces.
"Oh, right," said Tim, sounding a bit embarrassed.
"Cool!" cried Cosmo. "For once I was smarter than Timmy!"
Tim groaned. "Don't call me Timmy, please! It's Tim!"
"I wish we were inside!" cried Terri suddenly. With a wave of Katie's wand, the five were standing inside the evil lair.
"Well, that was simple," muttered Tim. The fairies put their wands out of sight, and just in time too, for at that moment Crocker and Charlotte rounded the corner.
"TURNER!" cried Crocker.
"Crocker!" gasped Tim.
"Hey, I remember you!" cried Terri, pointing at Charlotte. "I ran into you, remember?"
Katie gasped. "It's Charlotte Roosevelt! The direct descendant of one of the greatest men who ever lived!"
"Flattered," muttered Charlotte. "Who are you guys and what are you doing here?"
Tim spoke up before anyone else could. "These--" he pointed to Cosmo and Wanda "--are Castle Uhsmith's parents, Cosmo and Wanda Uhsmith. This--" he pointed to Terri "--is my little sister Terri Turner, who is Cassie's best friend. And, uh…" He looked urgently at Katie.
"I'm Terri's babysitter," said Katie quickly. "I just started, that's why Tim doesn't know me all that well. My name's Katie."
"And I'm Tim, Tim Turner," Tim said, wiping a bit of sweat from his forehead.
Charlotte stared at Katie. "How did you know who I am?"
Katie shrugged. "I'm a Fairly Oddparents version of the author of this story. I know everything."
"Coughcough--YEAH RIGHT--coughcough," chortled Commander.
"So you're all here to rescue Castle," said Charlotte. "Good, I'm not sure how well Denzel and I could have done on our own. Does anyone have any plans?"
Everyone was silent. Finally, Cosmo raised his hand.
"Take Castle and run?" he asked.
"Hmm… very simple," said Charlotte, deep in thought. "That random evil guy won't be expecting it. Sounds good to me. Do all of you approve?"
"Oh yeah, sure," everyone murmured in agreement, nodding their heads.
"Alright." A dangerous blaze shone in Charlotte's eyes. "Let's do this!"
The seven of them burst into the main throne room thing. "Freeze, scum!" cried Charlotte.
Henry looked annoyed. "Can't you come back in, like, twenty minutes? This machine will be working by then."
"Oh, thank goodness you guys came!" cried Castle, who was chained to the wall. "It was getting really boring in here."
Wanda glared at Henry. "Let our daughter go, you…"
"NEVER!" cried Henry. "I need to harness her fairy energy!"
"I KNEW IT!" cried Crocker, pointing to Castle in a crazed way. "She's a FAIRY!"
"Oh no, not someone else who believes in fairies," muttered Henry. He pulled out a handgun. "Looks like I'll have to eliminate you." He aimed at Crocker and pulled the trigger.
Charlotte suddenly pushed Crocker out of the way and staggered. Everyone gasped.
"Oh, you sick animal," Katie finally growled. She grabbed some loose rope and very quickly tied him up in a helpless bundle.
"Well, that was simple," muttered Terri.
"CHARLOTTE!" cried Crocker, grabbing Charlotte, who still hadn't fallen. "Speak to me!"
"Let go of me, you idiot," muttered Charlotte. "I'm fine." She pointed to her right breast pocket, where the bullet hole was. "I had my little hand-held mirror and a folded up speech for a speech I was going to make at the library today. It slowed the bullet down. I think it's in me, and it does hurt, but I know for a fact that I'm not gonna die from this."
"Wow, that's just how Theodore Roosevelt avoided dying from a bullet being shot in his chest!" cried Katie. "Except that it was a glasses case and a re-election speech…"
Terri rolled her eyes. "Like great-great-grandfather, like great-great-granddaughter."
Tim handed Charlotte a handkerchief, which she held to her breast. "Alright Denzel, yes."
Crocker looked confused. "Yes what?"
Charlotte couldn't hide a small smile creeping up on her face. "When you asked me if I loved you, remember? I guess the answer must be yes, if I'm willing to take a bullet for you."
"YIPPEE!" cried Crocker, jumping in the air. "Will you marry me?"
"Well, that's a different--"
"We can stop at the court of law before we have supper--"
"What? Marry you TODAY?" gasped Charlotte. "Now, Denzel, getting married is a huge commitment which we shouldn't rush!" She thought for a moment. "How about tomorrow?"
"Goodie!" cried Crocker. "I don't know if I can wait that long though…"
During all the…uh… "mushy-ness", Cosmo and Wanda had been able to discretely pull their wands out and release Castle. Castle ran up and hugged her parents. "I knew you would come and get me!" she said happily.
"He didn't hurt you, did he, sweetie?" asked Wanda, stroking her daughter's hair in a concerned manner.
"No, he just scared me a little," said Castle.
"As scary as moldy cheese?" asked Cosmo.
"No, Daddy, even SCARIER!" cried Castle. "But speaking of cheese, I'm hungry. Can you make me a grilled cheese sandwich when we get home, Mommy?"
"Sure thing, dumpling," said Wanda. The Uhsmiths walked back to where all the hubbub was.
"You're invited to our wedding!" cried Crocker, pointing at Tim and Terri. "And you!" he said, pointing at Cosmo, Wanda, and Castle. "And--" he looked at Katie. "I don't even know who you are, but you're invited too!"
"Joy, a social situation," muttered Katie. "We all know how much I love those."
***
Nine months later…
"You know," muttered Charlotte Roosevelt Crocker, sitting on the couch in her new home, "if someone had told me the morning of the day we met that nine months from now I'd be about ready to give birth, I would've laughed in his face."
"Uh… FAIRY GODPARENTS!" cried Crocker, not knowing what else to say.
"Whatever," said Charlotte. "Look, our son is going to be born any day now, and we still don't know what to call him!"
"I still say Denzel Jr.," said Crocker with a shrug.
"We can't do that," said Charlotte, shaking her head. "There's already a fan character named that." She thought for a moment. "How about Theodore? We could call him Theodore Denzel Crocker. Do you like it?"
Crocker shrugged. "It's fine with me. FAIRIES!"
Charlotte rolled her eyes. "Why do you always have to say that?"
"It's a part of who I am! Don't worry though, I have accepted the fact that that Uhsmith girl is not a fairy as I previously thought."
"Good to hear." Charlotte suddenly winced. "Denzel, I think little Theodore is ready to come out!"
"WHAT?"
***
At the hospital…
The doctors--and Crocker--crowded around Charlotte. "Hold on, Mrs. Crocker, this is going to be rough."
"I've given birth before, you know," muttered Charlotte.
"Oh," said the doctor, sounding embarrassed. "So… do you know what this one will be?"
"My doctor said it was a little boy," said Charlotte. "Aaaaarrggh!"
"It's coming out!" cried Crocker.
"I KNOW THAT!" screamed Charlotte.
Crocker suddenly decided that he didn't want to see this. He turned his face away, trying to ignore the painful cries of Charlotte. Finally, he heard a baby cry.
"Ooh! Let me see!" he cried, running towards them.
"Congratulations, it's a girl!" said one of the doctors.
Charlotte and Crocker blinked. "A GIRL?"
"That doctor was pretty messed up," muttered Charlotte. "How could anyone confuse a girl for a boy?"
"Poopy!" sulked Crocker, sitting down on a chair. "I wanted a boy!"
"And what's wrong with girls, might I ask?" growled Charlotte.
"Nothing!" cried Crocker.
"Here, she's cleaned off a bit," said a doctor, handing the baby to Charlotte. "You can hold her for a minute or two before we go and weigh her."
Charlotte held her baby, who was still crying, but who stopped long enough to reveal that, unlike most babies, her eyes were dark brown. Just like her mothers. She also had a little crop of black hair on the top of her head.
"So, what should we call her?" asked Charlotte to Denzel.
"Uh… Theodora Denzela Crocker?"
"Nah," said Charlotte. "How about… Margaret Roosevelt Crocker?"
"Whatever you want," said Crocker with a shrug.
No one noticed that Tim, Terri, Katie, Cosmo, Wanda, and Castle, as birds, were peeking in the window. "How adorable!" cried Castle.
"I never wanna watch someone giving birth again," said Terri, sticking out her tongue.
Tim rolled his eyes. "Commander, this has to be the STUPIDEST story you've ever written!"
"I know," said Commander sheepishly. "That's why I ended it so quickly!"
"This is the end?" asked Wanda, sounding confused.
"No," said Cosmo, "this is!"
THE END
"Go home, everybody," muttered Katie, flying away.
(AN: Yes… you can tell that I didn't really want to write this, since I finished it! But there we go, it's over. Go away! Oh yeah, thanks to everyone who reviewed this pointless story.)
Crocker dashed through the dungeon hallway, yelling, "Charlotte! CHARLOTTE!"
"What is it, Denzel?" asked Charlotte in exasperation, turning around. Crocker grabbed her so tightly that both of them fell to the ground.
"I LOVE YOU!" he yelled.
Charlotte blinked.
"Uh, I mean…" Crocker searched for words. "Uh… I love you… a lot?"
"Whoa, hold the phone!" cried Charlotte.
Crocker pulled out his cell phone.
"You love me? But you just met me!" cried Charlotte. "I thought you hated me, and now suddenly you love me?" Charlotte scratched her head.
"Do you love me back?" asked Crocker, with the eagerness of a puppy.
"How am I supposed to know?" yelled Charlotte. "I just met you!"
"Poopy," said Crocker, pouting a bit.
"Look," muttered Charlotte, "let's just go get Castle and get out of here, okay?"
"Fine," said Crocker. "Then I can use her as proof of FAIRY GOD--Errrk!"
Charlotte grabbed Crocker by the shirt collar and led him out of the dungeons.
***
Tim and Terri, now humans, and Cosmo, Wanda, and Katie, now looking like humans, stood in front of the door at the evil lair. Tim tugged at the door. "It's locked," he said. "How are we supposed to get in?"
Cosmo, Wanda, and Katie held up their wands, with a "no duh" look on their faces.
"Oh, right," said Tim, sounding a bit embarrassed.
"Cool!" cried Cosmo. "For once I was smarter than Timmy!"
Tim groaned. "Don't call me Timmy, please! It's Tim!"
"I wish we were inside!" cried Terri suddenly. With a wave of Katie's wand, the five were standing inside the evil lair.
"Well, that was simple," muttered Tim. The fairies put their wands out of sight, and just in time too, for at that moment Crocker and Charlotte rounded the corner.
"TURNER!" cried Crocker.
"Crocker!" gasped Tim.
"Hey, I remember you!" cried Terri, pointing at Charlotte. "I ran into you, remember?"
Katie gasped. "It's Charlotte Roosevelt! The direct descendant of one of the greatest men who ever lived!"
"Flattered," muttered Charlotte. "Who are you guys and what are you doing here?"
Tim spoke up before anyone else could. "These--" he pointed to Cosmo and Wanda "--are Castle Uhsmith's parents, Cosmo and Wanda Uhsmith. This--" he pointed to Terri "--is my little sister Terri Turner, who is Cassie's best friend. And, uh…" He looked urgently at Katie.
"I'm Terri's babysitter," said Katie quickly. "I just started, that's why Tim doesn't know me all that well. My name's Katie."
"And I'm Tim, Tim Turner," Tim said, wiping a bit of sweat from his forehead.
Charlotte stared at Katie. "How did you know who I am?"
Katie shrugged. "I'm a Fairly Oddparents version of the author of this story. I know everything."
"Coughcough--YEAH RIGHT--coughcough," chortled Commander.
"So you're all here to rescue Castle," said Charlotte. "Good, I'm not sure how well Denzel and I could have done on our own. Does anyone have any plans?"
Everyone was silent. Finally, Cosmo raised his hand.
"Take Castle and run?" he asked.
"Hmm… very simple," said Charlotte, deep in thought. "That random evil guy won't be expecting it. Sounds good to me. Do all of you approve?"
"Oh yeah, sure," everyone murmured in agreement, nodding their heads.
"Alright." A dangerous blaze shone in Charlotte's eyes. "Let's do this!"
The seven of them burst into the main throne room thing. "Freeze, scum!" cried Charlotte.
Henry looked annoyed. "Can't you come back in, like, twenty minutes? This machine will be working by then."
"Oh, thank goodness you guys came!" cried Castle, who was chained to the wall. "It was getting really boring in here."
Wanda glared at Henry. "Let our daughter go, you…"
"NEVER!" cried Henry. "I need to harness her fairy energy!"
"I KNEW IT!" cried Crocker, pointing to Castle in a crazed way. "She's a FAIRY!"
"Oh no, not someone else who believes in fairies," muttered Henry. He pulled out a handgun. "Looks like I'll have to eliminate you." He aimed at Crocker and pulled the trigger.
Charlotte suddenly pushed Crocker out of the way and staggered. Everyone gasped.
"Oh, you sick animal," Katie finally growled. She grabbed some loose rope and very quickly tied him up in a helpless bundle.
"Well, that was simple," muttered Terri.
"CHARLOTTE!" cried Crocker, grabbing Charlotte, who still hadn't fallen. "Speak to me!"
"Let go of me, you idiot," muttered Charlotte. "I'm fine." She pointed to her right breast pocket, where the bullet hole was. "I had my little hand-held mirror and a folded up speech for a speech I was going to make at the library today. It slowed the bullet down. I think it's in me, and it does hurt, but I know for a fact that I'm not gonna die from this."
"Wow, that's just how Theodore Roosevelt avoided dying from a bullet being shot in his chest!" cried Katie. "Except that it was a glasses case and a re-election speech…"
Terri rolled her eyes. "Like great-great-grandfather, like great-great-granddaughter."
Tim handed Charlotte a handkerchief, which she held to her breast. "Alright Denzel, yes."
Crocker looked confused. "Yes what?"
Charlotte couldn't hide a small smile creeping up on her face. "When you asked me if I loved you, remember? I guess the answer must be yes, if I'm willing to take a bullet for you."
"YIPPEE!" cried Crocker, jumping in the air. "Will you marry me?"
"Well, that's a different--"
"We can stop at the court of law before we have supper--"
"What? Marry you TODAY?" gasped Charlotte. "Now, Denzel, getting married is a huge commitment which we shouldn't rush!" She thought for a moment. "How about tomorrow?"
"Goodie!" cried Crocker. "I don't know if I can wait that long though…"
During all the…uh… "mushy-ness", Cosmo and Wanda had been able to discretely pull their wands out and release Castle. Castle ran up and hugged her parents. "I knew you would come and get me!" she said happily.
"He didn't hurt you, did he, sweetie?" asked Wanda, stroking her daughter's hair in a concerned manner.
"No, he just scared me a little," said Castle.
"As scary as moldy cheese?" asked Cosmo.
"No, Daddy, even SCARIER!" cried Castle. "But speaking of cheese, I'm hungry. Can you make me a grilled cheese sandwich when we get home, Mommy?"
"Sure thing, dumpling," said Wanda. The Uhsmiths walked back to where all the hubbub was.
"You're invited to our wedding!" cried Crocker, pointing at Tim and Terri. "And you!" he said, pointing at Cosmo, Wanda, and Castle. "And--" he looked at Katie. "I don't even know who you are, but you're invited too!"
"Joy, a social situation," muttered Katie. "We all know how much I love those."
***
Nine months later…
"You know," muttered Charlotte Roosevelt Crocker, sitting on the couch in her new home, "if someone had told me the morning of the day we met that nine months from now I'd be about ready to give birth, I would've laughed in his face."
"Uh… FAIRY GODPARENTS!" cried Crocker, not knowing what else to say.
"Whatever," said Charlotte. "Look, our son is going to be born any day now, and we still don't know what to call him!"
"I still say Denzel Jr.," said Crocker with a shrug.
"We can't do that," said Charlotte, shaking her head. "There's already a fan character named that." She thought for a moment. "How about Theodore? We could call him Theodore Denzel Crocker. Do you like it?"
Crocker shrugged. "It's fine with me. FAIRIES!"
Charlotte rolled her eyes. "Why do you always have to say that?"
"It's a part of who I am! Don't worry though, I have accepted the fact that that Uhsmith girl is not a fairy as I previously thought."
"Good to hear." Charlotte suddenly winced. "Denzel, I think little Theodore is ready to come out!"
"WHAT?"
***
At the hospital…
The doctors--and Crocker--crowded around Charlotte. "Hold on, Mrs. Crocker, this is going to be rough."
"I've given birth before, you know," muttered Charlotte.
"Oh," said the doctor, sounding embarrassed. "So… do you know what this one will be?"
"My doctor said it was a little boy," said Charlotte. "Aaaaarrggh!"
"It's coming out!" cried Crocker.
"I KNOW THAT!" screamed Charlotte.
Crocker suddenly decided that he didn't want to see this. He turned his face away, trying to ignore the painful cries of Charlotte. Finally, he heard a baby cry.
"Ooh! Let me see!" he cried, running towards them.
"Congratulations, it's a girl!" said one of the doctors.
Charlotte and Crocker blinked. "A GIRL?"
"That doctor was pretty messed up," muttered Charlotte. "How could anyone confuse a girl for a boy?"
"Poopy!" sulked Crocker, sitting down on a chair. "I wanted a boy!"
"And what's wrong with girls, might I ask?" growled Charlotte.
"Nothing!" cried Crocker.
"Here, she's cleaned off a bit," said a doctor, handing the baby to Charlotte. "You can hold her for a minute or two before we go and weigh her."
Charlotte held her baby, who was still crying, but who stopped long enough to reveal that, unlike most babies, her eyes were dark brown. Just like her mothers. She also had a little crop of black hair on the top of her head.
"So, what should we call her?" asked Charlotte to Denzel.
"Uh… Theodora Denzela Crocker?"
"Nah," said Charlotte. "How about… Margaret Roosevelt Crocker?"
"Whatever you want," said Crocker with a shrug.
No one noticed that Tim, Terri, Katie, Cosmo, Wanda, and Castle, as birds, were peeking in the window. "How adorable!" cried Castle.
"I never wanna watch someone giving birth again," said Terri, sticking out her tongue.
Tim rolled his eyes. "Commander, this has to be the STUPIDEST story you've ever written!"
"I know," said Commander sheepishly. "That's why I ended it so quickly!"
"This is the end?" asked Wanda, sounding confused.
"No," said Cosmo, "this is!"
THE END
"Go home, everybody," muttered Katie, flying away.
(AN: Yes… you can tell that I didn't really want to write this, since I finished it! But there we go, it's over. Go away! Oh yeah, thanks to everyone who reviewed this pointless story.)