The Very Secret Diary of Bruce Wayne
By Dommi
Okay…I had this epiphany while taking a friend home recently that Bruce Wayne needs to do more weird things in fan fiction. Not Batman…Bruce Wayne. I mean, the man has serious potential for comedy gold, with his golf and his perpetually wearing white socks with his suits. (I must say, if that doesn't scream heterosexual, I don't know what does, folks.)
So um…Bruce Wayne, Batman, Dick Grayson, Nightwing, Tim Drake, Robin, Cassandra Cain, Batgirl, Helena Bertinelli, Huntress, Barbara Gordon, Oracle, Dinah Lance, Black Canary, Clark Kent, Superman, Lois Lane, Jim Gordon, the Justice League, and Alfred Pennyworth were created and are owned by DC Comics. Basically, anyone who shows up here doesn't belong to me. The original Very Secret Diaries concept belongs to Cassie Claire, but I had honestly never heard of it until my friend Marty did one for Snape from Harry Potter.
This is dedicated to the Christy, because a) it's her birthday and b) she is the one who I had the idea with and who helped encourage me. Give her candy or kill her for her complicity, whichever floats your boat.
I think I should apologize for this, but I don't want to. So there. Oh and this is SUPPOSED TO BE OUT OF CHARACTER. Otherwise, it's just not funny.
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Dear Diary,
I'm stealing...uh, following Alfred's example and have decided to keep a log of my adventures, both as therapy and just to have on record. However, as he is chronicling my adventures as the Batman, I decided I should take care of my more simplistic "real" life.
After all, not everyone is Bruce Wayne, wealthy playboy socialite and all-around hot piece of ass. I think I owe it to the world to see what life for this industrialist, philanthropist, modern-day Cassanova and crime fighter is really like.
Let's see…today has been a good day for many reasons. For one thing, I woke up feeling pretty this morning. More than usual, I mean. Rarely have even my crystalline blue eyes been so sparkling and-dare I say it-luminescent! Although, I'm a bit concerned that the new Batsuit makes me look hippy…I'll have to look into that….
But the other reason why today is the best day of this year at least is that my project is finally completed!
Wayne Manor finally has its own Starbucks.
It's in the East Wing, next to my study for easy access before late-night patrolling! Now I can have my necessary half-calf extra hot raspberry mocha soy latte with whip whenever my pretty little heart desires!
Being richer than God rules!
Also signed up for salsa lessons this afternoon. Soon, I too will be able to shake it like Shakira. (And I am very familiar with how Shakira "shakes it"…heh, heh. Yeah.) My first lesson is tomorrow evening, and I hear my instructor is excellent.
IMPORTANT THINGS OF NOTE:
Tee-Time: 1:00 PM at Bristol Links
Patrol Route: Fashion District to Arkham with Cassandra (Tim has something to do with that school thing of his or something.)
Days Until I am Sexiest Man Alive: 35
Song of the Moment: "Burning Up" by Kylie Minogue (Note to self: Get Kylie for 38th Birthday fiesta.)
I think that's everything for now, Diary. I'll be sure to let you know how the first lesson goes!
Bruce Wayne
By Dommi
Okay…I had this epiphany while taking a friend home recently that Bruce Wayne needs to do more weird things in fan fiction. Not Batman…Bruce Wayne. I mean, the man has serious potential for comedy gold, with his golf and his perpetually wearing white socks with his suits. (I must say, if that doesn't scream heterosexual, I don't know what does, folks.)
So um…Bruce Wayne, Batman, Dick Grayson, Nightwing, Tim Drake, Robin, Cassandra Cain, Batgirl, Helena Bertinelli, Huntress, Barbara Gordon, Oracle, Dinah Lance, Black Canary, Clark Kent, Superman, Lois Lane, Jim Gordon, the Justice League, and Alfred Pennyworth were created and are owned by DC Comics. Basically, anyone who shows up here doesn't belong to me. The original Very Secret Diaries concept belongs to Cassie Claire, but I had honestly never heard of it until my friend Marty did one for Snape from Harry Potter.
This is dedicated to the Christy, because a) it's her birthday and b) she is the one who I had the idea with and who helped encourage me. Give her candy or kill her for her complicity, whichever floats your boat.
I think I should apologize for this, but I don't want to. So there. Oh and this is SUPPOSED TO BE OUT OF CHARACTER. Otherwise, it's just not funny.
----------------------------------------------------------
Dear Diary,
I'm stealing...uh, following Alfred's example and have decided to keep a log of my adventures, both as therapy and just to have on record. However, as he is chronicling my adventures as the Batman, I decided I should take care of my more simplistic "real" life.
After all, not everyone is Bruce Wayne, wealthy playboy socialite and all-around hot piece of ass. I think I owe it to the world to see what life for this industrialist, philanthropist, modern-day Cassanova and crime fighter is really like.
Let's see…today has been a good day for many reasons. For one thing, I woke up feeling pretty this morning. More than usual, I mean. Rarely have even my crystalline blue eyes been so sparkling and-dare I say it-luminescent! Although, I'm a bit concerned that the new Batsuit makes me look hippy…I'll have to look into that….
But the other reason why today is the best day of this year at least is that my project is finally completed!
Wayne Manor finally has its own Starbucks.
It's in the East Wing, next to my study for easy access before late-night patrolling! Now I can have my necessary half-calf extra hot raspberry mocha soy latte with whip whenever my pretty little heart desires!
Being richer than God rules!
Also signed up for salsa lessons this afternoon. Soon, I too will be able to shake it like Shakira. (And I am very familiar with how Shakira "shakes it"…heh, heh. Yeah.) My first lesson is tomorrow evening, and I hear my instructor is excellent.
IMPORTANT THINGS OF NOTE:
Tee-Time: 1:00 PM at Bristol Links
Patrol Route: Fashion District to Arkham with Cassandra (Tim has something to do with that school thing of his or something.)
Days Until I am Sexiest Man Alive: 35
Song of the Moment: "Burning Up" by Kylie Minogue (Note to self: Get Kylie for 38th Birthday fiesta.)
I think that's everything for now, Diary. I'll be sure to let you know how the first lesson goes!
Bruce Wayne