Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 8 or it's characters.

This story is for Draic (Haha!) my big brother, for editing my stories, putting up with me barging into his room to tell him about story ideas and problems, giving me a good supply of Final Fantasy games and just being there for me. Thanks.

This is the story about the time garden held its first… and last fire drill.

Squall sat at his desk trying to pay attention to the stack of paper he was meant to have finished by the end of the day while also trying to listen to his girlfriend/sorceress as she tried to cheer him up.

"No really Rinoa, you don't have to," he muttered, putting a signed sheet into the 'out' box and reaching for another from the 'in' box.

"But I want to!" Rinoa insisted, "Besides, You've been working non-stop since the Sorceress War so you deserve a break."

Can't argue with that. "Yeah ok, I'll talk to Cid about it." Send a squad of SeeD's to try and recover the Luna base? Squall signed his name and pushed the sheet of paper away.

"So where do you want to go?" Rinoa chirped, sitting on the corner of his desk and smiling down at him.

Squall sighed and leaned back in his chair. He gave Rinoa a tired smile. "Surprise me."

Rinoa jumped down off his desk and gave him a quick kiss. "See you at lunch."

He regretfully attacked the tower of paper in his in box. He hoped to be finished soon, as long as there were no interruptions.

As if on cue, the big oak doors banged open to allow the usually bumbling Headmaster to storm in he looked like someone had ran over his cat…repeatedly. Squall slowly stood and saluted, wondering what the hell he'd done now. Maybe I shouldn't have had the amount of funding for the festival committee raised. Or the supply of hotdogs increased. He thought tiredly, Damn friends!

"Squall! Have you read this piece of junk?" he raged, shaking a piece of paper around.

I can't see it from here, old man. "No sir," he replied stoically.

"These are the regulations for any school or training institution." He threw the paper at Squall who caught it and began to read aloud.

"1. School should not have co-ed dormitories.

2. School should have a qualified doctor on campus at all times.

3. Teachers should not partake in seducing their-."

"Get to number 35! The one I highlighted," Cid fumed.

Squall raised an eyebrow and looked at the highlighted rule surrounded by amusing little cartoons, (scrawled by a certain Headmaster) of the some poor fool dying in horrible ways with the grinning artist next to him.

"35. School staff and students should be actively prepared for emergencies, example, Fire drill."

"Prepared! This garden fought against Galbadia and the Sorceress! SeeD are ready for action at any moment. And they want us to have fire drills!" Cid yelled. "Can you guess who sent this?"

Squall felt like rolling his eyes. "No sir."

"That rich old man who owns that mansion on the hill, the one that's interested in sponsoring Garden and bringing in some funding!" He rubbed his forehead. "I'm supposed to be meeting him in Balamb. He wants to make sure Garden is the right kind of place for him and for that, he wants to make sure that we're following the regulations!"

Ah, so the cartoon victim is the future sponsor, Squall thought. He's finally cracked

"Squall! We're going to have a fire drill! I don't care when but we're going to have one. If he asks about it I'll lie." With that he stormed out of Squall's office.

Squall sighed, collapsing into his chair. After waiting just long enough for Cid to have left the building and hit the intercom. "This is Commander Leonhart, there is a fire within Garden. Please do not panic, leave the garden in an orderly fashion and make sure the junior classmen are safe." With that he switched the intercom off and locked his doors. At least I won't have any unwanted interruptions.

*****

Cid stood and offered his hand to the newcomer. "Cid Kramer."

"Charles De Luca" He replied, accepting Cid's hand.

"I'm glad you could come. I think you'll find Balamb Garden a very calm, controlled place."

Charles De Luca hopped into the car and Cid started the drive back to Garden.

*****

"Listen everyone. Commaner Weonhart is talking!" one of the younger junior classman called.

"He's funny!" another giggled.

Quistis smiled, wondering what Mr. 'Weonhart' would think of that.

"-a fire within Garden. Please do not panic, leave the garden in an orderly fashion and make sure the junior classmen are safe," Commaner Weonhart said calmly.

The junior classman waited politely for him to say something else than went back to playing on the quad grass like nothing had happened at all.

Quistis looked cautiously around at the junior classmen as they chattered on.

"Now children, I don't want you to panic but there is a fire in Garden," the instructor started. "Stay calm, please remain-!"

The rest of her sentence was cut off by the frantic screams of twenty or so junior classmen running out of the room and scattering in different directions.

"-Together and listen to me…" she finished, looking around the now empty room. "Oh dear Hyne."

****

"My SeeD are very intelligent." Cid bragged.

****

"You are so god damn sexy, Kinneas." Irvine purred at his mirror. He tipped his cowboy hat to the angle of perfection and gave his reflection what was in his opinion a devastatingly sexy smirk. He was vaguely aware of Squall talking over the intercom but didn't bother to listen. As he surveyed himself in the full-length mirror, striking poses and parading around the room to his self-proclaimed theme song. "I'm too sexy for my car, too sexy for my car. Too sexy by far. And I'm too sexy for my hat, too sexy for my hat. What do you think about that?" He twirled around to face his door, enjoying the way his coat fluttered through the air to follow. He slid the door open and strutted out of the room.

"Ladies, lock your doors! Irvine's on the prowl!" he called to the hallway.

An instant later someone ran into him, promptly falling on her ass.

Irvine grinned down at Fujin. Ah less than a minute and women are already falling for me!

Fujin glared up at the smiling cowboy and angrily brushed her silvery bangs out of her good eye. She ignored the offered hand and stood up.

"IDIOT!" She yelled. She gestured around frantically with her arms. "ON FIRE!"

Irvine grinned. "That's right baby. I'm on fire!" He struck a pose.

"RAGE!" Fujin screamed and promptly kicked him in the shin before running away.

Irvine clutched his shin, making sure his perfect leg wasn't bruised. "Playing hard to get? I like that in a girl!"

Raijin stopped his mad dash to keep up with Fujin and patted Irvine on the shoulder. "You're stupider than I am!" he laughed then ran around the corner to follow his friend.

Irvine frowned as a second later Raijin returned, patted him on the shoulder again and added, "Ya know?"

****

"My SeeD are the epitome of teamwork."

****

"-a fire within Garden. Please do not panic-"

"Run for it!" Xu screamed and suddenly the classroom of SeeD cadets bolted out of the room leaving a startled Zell and Selphie behind.

"Quick Zell!" Selphie yelled, grabbing the martial artist's hand and following the crowd.

The entire group of cadets and their instructor had squashed themselves into the elevator and the doors were jerkily closing.

"Wait!" Zell yelled, pulling the doors back open and trying to squish in.

"There's no room for you two!" Xu shouted as several cadets tried to push the door closed.

"We'll make room!" Selphie insisted, joining in the struggle with Zell.

"Every SeeD for themselves!" Xu screamed and promptly kicked Zell in the groin.

"Gghhnnhh!" escaped Zell's lips as he curled up in the fetal position on the floor.

Immediately the cadets closed the door as Selphie pounded her fist on the glass. "You bitch! Why the hell did you do that? Hey get back here!"

The elevator disappeared and Zell continued to writhe around on the floor. "Steel tipped boots!" He wheezed.

Selphie gave the elevator door one last kick then knelt down to comfort her best friend. "Geez I guess that hurts a lot doesn't it?"

Zell gave her a look and mumbled under his breath.

"Well then…Cure!" Selphie stuck her hand out and watched as Zell's face relaxed.

"I'm going to kill her!" he shouted suddenly and leapt up, hitting punching the elevator button.

Selphie jumped from foot to foot, waiting.

"Umm…Selphie? The lift isn't working," Zell whispered.

****

"All SeeD Instructors have been taught how to take control of their students in emergencies."

****

Quistis bolted after the junior classmen. As they scattered in different directions she resisted the urge to scream.

She took a couple of calming breaths. "You can do this Quistis."

Quistis opened her eyes to see a junior classmen streak past screaming wildly.

"STOP!" She commanded, thrusting her hand out. Something shot out of her palm and hit the kid square in the back. He froze, one leg raised in the air.

Quistis whooped for joy. "One down, eleven to go!"

She listened for childlike screams and set off through the trees of the quad. Three of her students came running down the path, about to run past her leafy cover. She leapt out in front of them. "Triple!" Her students screamed and tried to run. "Stop!" Three glowing sparks hit the students. Quistis pulled a rope out from her utility belt and looped it around her stationary students.

****

"I've heard rumours about the sorceress residing in Balamb Garden…"

"Rinoa? She is a very caring person, totally devoted to the friends she has in garden."

****

Rinoa searched the crowds for her boyfriend, hoping to see him doing something heroic like carrying a child who he'd saved by diving through flames. Instead she saw the elevator jerking awkwardly down and stopping about a foot off the ground. The group of SeeD cadets in the elevator yanked the door open and ran out of there as if Ultimicia herself was after them. Rinoa caught sight of their instructor following closely behind.

"Xu!" Rinoa called and rushed over to her.

"Rinoa? There's a fire. We should be evacuating," the Instructor insisted.

"I know but not until I find Squall, have you seen him?" Rinoa continued to scan the faces for her knight in shining… black leather.

Xu bit her lip and looked somewhat embarrassed. "I caught the last elevator down and it shut down automatically after we got out. Squall's still up there."

Rinoa looked up at the third floor where Squall was probably trapped, doomed to die in flames.

Rinoa turned to Xu and began her Limit Break.

Xu took the chance to run for it.

"Hang on Squall," Rinoa called, her brown eyes suddenly glowing gold. "I'm coming!" Beautiful white wings spread out from her shoulders.

With a graceful swish of her wings she floated into the air, gaining more height with every sweep.

****

Quistis surveyed her class of frozen juniors. She'd arranged them in two straight lines.

Quickly she cast several esunas and watched, slightly amused as her class toppled over. They got up, confused.

"Listen to me! There is a fire. If you run you will die. Stay in line and walk in front of me," she ordered.

The cadets meekly walked in front of her. As they walked past the Infirmary, Seifer came strolling casually out, looking like the cat that got the cream…or the Seifer that kicked the Chicken-wuss.

"Trepe." He nodded in her direction. "Teaching the children how to walk?"

"Seifer? What the hell have you been doing?" Quistis asked, keeping her eyes on her jittery children.

"Sleeping," he answered smirking "Told Xu I was due for my anger management session with Kadowaki, got out of Ancient History; told the doc I felt sick, got to sleep."

"Seifer, that could get you a detention," Quistis growled. "Do you even know that Garden is on fire?"

His smirk vanished. "What? Shit, we're all going to die!" he yelled. He turned to the junior classmen. "What the hell are you just standing there for! Garden's on fire! Run!"

In an instant there was a distinct lack of cadets and a lot more screaming.

Quistis' eyes bulged. "Seifer Almasy," She hissed, stalking up to him. "You are going to help me round up my class or you are going to lose something you may need if, Hyne forbid, you ever want to see little Seifers running around."

Seifer nodded very quickly.

****

Every good story has a good hero.

Nida stepped out of his dorm dressed in immaculate SeeD uniform looking immensely calm. Which was relatively easy if you took into count the fact that Quistis' class was running around screaming.

This was his day…he could feel it this would be his day to prove himself to Garden. No longer would people ask him who he was and where he found his uniform, no longer would Squall and his group get all the glory and finally Cid would stop forgetting who he was and not paying him.

Nida waved a hand at a couple children in his way. They looked at him.

"Please step back I'm going to save Garden." He shouted.

The children stepped back against the wall.

Nida stepped forwards and closed his eyes. Suddenly he snapped his hand out palm outwards.

"Leviathan!" He called.

The great serpent appeared in its on fancy way and stopped suddenly as it failed to find a target.

"Masster?" It hissed confused.

Nida tried to appear in charge with the size factors disagreeing. "Leviathan. I have summoned you for a special purpose. I would like you to put out all the fires in Balamb Garden."

Leviathan looked around the area then back at Nida if it'd had eyebrows it would have raised one instead it gave him the fish eyes. "Firess?"

Nida nodded.

"Okaay…" Leviathan muttered unsure. From what he could see Garden wasn't on fire there were just a lot of panicking people.

"Now go!" Nida commanded pointing towards the rest of Garden.

Leviathan wished it had eyebrows again. "Right. Well I'll jusst go a put out ssome firess then." It hissed sarcastically.

Nida grinned to himself as the giant serpent slithered away.

Leviathan slithered off grumbling to itself. "Put out firess! Bah! What am I a hosse?"

Leviathan stopped suddenly a thought rushing to its head. "I'm free…"

It bared its teeth in its own type of smile. "Yess!"

****

Irvine strolled casually over to a female cadet. He grabbed her hand and twirled her around to face him.

"Darling, this is your lucky day. Your eyes go with today's coat. How would you like a trip to the Secret Area?"

"What the hell?" she shouted. "Have you lost your mind?"

"No, but I have lost my heart to my sexy coat and I just have to have you to accessorize." He smiled.

"You idiot! Garden is on fire! We have to evacuate." She pulled out of his grip and stalked off.

Irvine looked horrified and bolted down the hallway to the entrance. He stopped as what must have been the entire population of Garden (or at least the well-trained part) filed slowly out at a snail's pace.

He bounced up and down. "Come on people! Today would be nice," He shouted.

They continued filing out calmly.

"Oh for Hyne's sake! I'm too young and handsome to burn!" He pulled out his shotgun and fired a couple of rounds. "Move people!"

Immediately the crowds started to panic and surge out of the Garden.

****

"Garden sounds perfect for a future partnership, Mr. Kramer."

"Wonderful. I have the contract in my office for when we get there."

****

"We're going to die aren't we?" Selphie whispered, leaning back against the railing.

Zell wrapped his arm around her and tried to smile for her. "We'll be fine."

Selphie looked down at the floor. "No we won't. We're going to die and take all of our sins and regrets with us."

Zell frowned, unsure how to deal with a pessimistic Selphie.

"Remember when someone accidentally put Seifer's trench coat in the wrong washing machine and it came out pink?" she whispered. "That was me."

Zell stared at his friend surprised. "Selphie?"

The girl looked down at the floor embarrassed. "I know I shouldn't have done it but I was so mad!"

"What are you kidding? You should have let me help!" Zell laughed.

Selphie grinned. "Your turn."

Zell leaned back on the railing and grinned. "You know the SeeD graduation this year…"

"You were the drunken idiot that streaked across the dance floor naked save for a paper bag over his head screaming 'I am the God of Studliness' then attempted to do a backflip only to land on his butt, then ran off laughing?" Selphie asked, eyes bulging.

"No!" Zell shouted indignantly.

Selphie settled back down.

"Did he really do all that?" Zell asked nervously.

Selphie grinned. "Yeah it was wicked. Cid looked like he was gonna explode and Squall was trying to keep a straight face. That guy was hot."

Zell sat up straighter and grinned in a self-satisfied way.

"Rinoa?" Selphie gasped.

Zell swiveled around in surprise to see the young sorceress flying past them with large graceful sweeps of her angel-like wings.

Zell jumped to his feet. "Rinoa! You've gotta help us! The elevator's stuck!"

Rinoa turned in mid air and surveyed them with golden eyes. "Is Squall with you?"

Selphie was practically jumping up and down with relief at seeing someone here to rescue them.

"No, I haven't seen him today," Zell answered. "Grab Selphie and take her down first."

"Sorry…not right now, I have to save Squall!" Rinoa said and flew up to the third level.

"Heeey!?" Selphie called after their friend. "I'm special too!"

****

Squall smiled to himself as he placed his final form in the out box and leaned back in his comfortable leather chair. I should have a fire drill everyday!

It was that instant that the thick oak doors exploded in a cloud of sawdust.

Squall leapt up from his seat, both hands automatically gripping his gunblade hilt, focusing on the space where his doors had been.

Rinoa flew through the air at a speed that would have made lightning seem slow and tackled the bewildered Squall through his office window.

"Squall!" she sobbed, clutching him in her arms, wings beating furiously to keep their combined weight afloat. Squall took one surprised look down at the ground and wrapped his arms around Rinoa's neck, hiding his face in her neck.

The couple was floating about ninety meters in the air. It wasn't that Squall was afraid of heights, (SeeD supposedly feared nothing). It was the fact that Squall was very, very high in the air relying solely on his girlfriend not dropping him and her magical wings keeping them him up in the air.

"Squall," she repeated, moving one hand so she could stroke his hair, which only caused the commander to clutch her even more tightly and let out a soft (but manly) whimper. "Squall, it's ok it's over we'll land somewhere safe. I know it'll be hard for you to see your home burn down but-"

Squall suddenly started to laugh hysterically. He pulled his head back enough to look his girlfriend in the eyes, tears running down his face as he laughed. "Rinoa?"

Rinoa made soothing noises, thinking her boyfriend had cracked under pressure.

Squall struggled to stop laughing. "Rinoa, it was a drill."

"Wha…?" Rinoa's golden eyes blinked and her cheeks tinged crimson. "Oh."

Now every good SeeD knows that Limit Breaks are brought on in times of terrible stress - whether mental physical or emotional. Under the stress of worrying her boyfriend would die in a fire Rinoa had managed to use her Limit and manipulated it to fly up to his office. Now that the fear of her boyfriend burning to a crisp had been banished she was no longer stressed.

I remind you that Rinoa was now in perfect mental, physical and emotional health.

****

"There is no way I am going to die sitting on my ass!" Zell yelled, punching the railing. "We're highly trained SeeD. We can get out of this."

Selphie nodded, jumping to her feet. "That's right! We can do it!" she cheered.

Zell looked around. "I got it! If you jump over the railing there's a chance you'll land in the water. Then when I make sure you're ok I'll follow."

Selphie suddenly seemed to be channeling Squall's spirit; she raised an eyebrow and put one hand on her hip. "You first," she said coolly.

Zell laughed nervously. "Yeah bad idea."

Selphie nodded. "Thought so."

Zell slumped slightly in thought. "Well then we could…um…we could use the escape mechanism?" He finished pitifully.

Selphie launched herself at him, hugging him tightly. "You're a genius Zell!" With that she bolted off towards the classrooms.

****

Cid and Charles De Luca pulled up just in front of Garden.

"Mr. De Luca, welcome to Balamb Garden," Cid said flinging his arm behind him.

The Future sponsor of SeeD didn't look impressed; he looked horrified.

Cid suddenly realised he was hearing gunfire and screaming and turned to see a swarm of his SeeD running at full speed towards him.

Now Cid may not have the skills that his SeeD but he did have enough sense to dive out of the way. More sense than Mr. De Luca did at least.

The panicked SeeD threw the old man roughly out of the way. He lay on the side of the road staring in horror as the swarm changed into a seemingly deranged cowboy who kept firing his shotgun in the air, screaming, "Faster for Hyne's sake!" and running after them down the road.

Charles stood up slowly and glared at Cid from across the road. "I suppose a good trampling is your usual greeting." He grumbled sarcastically.

He took a step forward towards the Headmaster.

"Move life-form of low intelligence!" A hissing voice ordered as Leviathan slithered towards them at a frighteningly fast rate.

Charles De Luca gaped at the gigantic serpent.

Leviathan slid to a halt, peered at the old man with its watery eyes and smiled.

The old man smiled back hesitantly.

Leviathan did something that was probably supposed to be a smirk and with a 'gentle' flick of its tail sent him flying through the air. "Ssucker!"

"Come back here!" Shouted a figure in SeeD uniform running towards Leviathan.

Leviathan turned to Nida and bared its teeth. "Yess masster? More firess?"

Nida glared at Leviathan. "Get back to Garden."

Leviathan drew up to its full height and snarled. "Garden is uselesss, firsst my vasst intellect is ignored and I am sent out to fight monsters that insult the fliess by their puninesss, passsing from one pathetic mind to another."

It slithered closer to Nida who was standing (also known as cowering) near the unfortunate supposed sponsor of Balamb Garden.

"But in all my thousandss of yearss never have I been inssulted sso much than when one of the most pathetic minds to ever refer to itself as my master thought. 'Oh yeah Leviathan ussess water I'll call it and tell it to put out all the nonexistent firess like a garden hosse!'" Leviathan sneered. "No more."

Water seemed to rise out of the very earth beneath the GF, forming itself into a giant wave of water.

Leviathan turned to slither off as the wall of water built itself larger. It turned it's head, looked back at Nida and winked. "Suffer." It snickered and dove into the ocean as the wall of water collapsed on the two men.

"Kramer!" spurted De Luca, getting to his feet "Is this the standard of SeeD you raise?" He held the drenched Nida by the collar.

Cid peered at Nida annoyed. "I can honestly tell you I have never seen this man before in my life. Where'd you steal that uniform boy?"

In Nida's head a thought was growing. I know! I'll quit than who'll fly the Garden? Ha then they'll remember me! "Found it." He answered casually. "Later gramps." He strolled off feeling proud of himself.

****

You'll find that if you go a day into the future Cid finds out that his Garden's autopilot isn't working anymore. Baffled he called Selphie and made her the first Pilot of Garden. Everyone agreed that she was better than the autopilot mode, even though with Selphie Garden embarked on many, many joyrides.

****

Charles frowned. "That wasn't a SeeD?"

"No just a hooligan. Now I'm sure we can settle this matter in my office…" Cid insisted hopefully.

Fresh screams broke the silence and about a dozen junior classman ran screaming past them. Two blonds were chasing them, shooting fireballs at them and shouting. "That's right, keep moving or the fire will get you!"

Cid felt his stomach drop out as De Luca silently watched the children and their 'guardians' run off towards Balamb town.

"I think that Balamb Garden is not the place for me," he said curtly, "and I'll be reporting this to the government."

Charles De Luca turned to stalk off when a large inflatable slide hit the ground behind him and two people screaming, "Wheeee!" hurtled into him knocking him to the ground rendering him unconscious.

Selphie and Zell stood up sheepishly. "Sorry sir! Garden's on fire… you should probably leave as well," Selphie reported, then turned to run to Balamb with Zell in tow.

"Fire?" Cid asked the now silent plains of Balamb. Realisation finally hit him. "Leonhart!!"

"Shhhhhiiiiiitttt!!!!" A voice screamed from somewhere high above the Headmaster.

****

Squall was hurtling through the air at a disturbingly fast rate. "Rinoa?!?!"

"Hang on!" His girlfriend screamed back at him falling next to him. Painfully slowly her angel wings spread from her back as the stress of the possibility of her boyfriend and her becoming permanently one as a bloody pulp, took over.

She grabbed him around the waist and braced herself for the jolt as her wings caught the air.

They glided gracefully down to the ground to land in front of the fuming Headmaster.

"Well, Commander. Well done. I leave you alone for ten minutes and now the entire population of Garden is laying siege on Balamb town and the man who is supposed to be handing me a large wad of cash is now unconscious! I expect the first words he will say when he wakes up will be. 'I believe I'll sue you now!' So what do you have to say for yourself?" he shouted.

Squall looked around for an explanation or just something to say. He looked at Rinoa who shrugged and squeezed his hand. "Well um Sir…I'd have to say that I feel…I um well…"

Squall took a deep breath, standing tall. "I'm going on a vacation!"

"What!?!?" Cid yelled.

The Commander of Garden flinched. Cid suddenly seemed to loom over him.

He turned and grabbed onto his bewildered girlfriend. "Fly Rinoa!"

The End? (';')

Hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. It took me a couple of months of a little voice insisting it was a good idea and thrusting little plot snippets at me until I typed the basic plot onto the computer and left it there. For those who are interested I've discovered the perfect way to rid yourself of writers block. Place a vague plan of a story in a folder saying 'don't touch' and that folder in a folder saying 'Back off' etc. You'll have a basic plan in about 5 folders telling you to leave it alone and if you're anything like me you'll write it to spite yourself, odd but it works.