Gazing
Chapter 01
by Myka
Beta: Amber and naaha
Sirius Black had never been so perplexed by anyone before. It wasn't until he was thirteen that someone caught his eye and it was quite surprising for him to feel such interest for someone he didn't know personally.
It wasn't until his best friend, James Potter, addressed the matter that Sirius discovered he had been paying such close attention to that person.
"Hey, Sirius don't you think that Lupin kid is a little unusual?"
"Unusual?" Sirius blinked idly. "I wouldn't call him unusual, he's more interesting than unusual, I think."
"But don't you think it's odd, how he disappears every month and how he hasn't made any friends?"
Sirius looked at James for a moment pondering this, then turned his gaze again toward the brunette a few seats behind. "Then maybe it's time someone goes ahead and befriends him," Sirius spoke softly as he pushed back a few strands of hair from his face.
"Are you sure that's a wise choice?" James asked back. "You don't want to damage our reputation, do you?"
"I seriously doubt that will happen," Sirius retorted confidently. "Besides, doesn't he call your attention? Like there's something about him you just want to get to know?"
James blinked, letting a small frown form on his face. "You sound like someone with a crush, Sirius."
Sirius blinked. "Eh?" Then he smiled. "That's a little too much, James," he replied calmly, letting his gaze fall once more upon a lonely Remus Lupin who was eating his meal alone. He sighed a bit, then thought to himself: 'But you just might be right.'
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"Sirius," James spoke, he poked at his desert and rested his chin on his palm. "We still have over twenty minutes before first period. It's boring just sitting here. What should we do?"
Sirius turned toward his friend with a thoughtful look in his grey eyes. "I've been thinking, James," he said seriously. "It's only been you and me for the past two years, right?"
James frowned slightly, not understanding the change of subject. "So?"
"So, if we want a gang, we need more people, don't you think?" Sirius finished, turning his eyes away from James.
James blinked. "More people?" he asked, confused. He frowned a bit more then looked in the direction of Sirius's gaze. "No way, Sirius!" he almost yelled, catching a few eyes from his fellow students. He got closer to Sirius and lowered his voice. "Lupin? You have to be kidding, Sirius. He's a loner and a bookworm; he can't possibly become a Marauder!"
"Aww, calm down, James. It's not like I'm just going to walk up to him, and bingo, he's our best friend."
James frowned even more. "What are you planning, Sirius?" he asked in a grim tone. "You have a weird look on your face."
Sirius just grinned. "If Remus Lupin ever wants to be a Marauder, my dear James, he has to pass my test."
"Test?" James replied, raising an eyebrow. Sirius just nodded, then stood up, his eyes going directly to Remus. James rolled his eyes. He had been noticing this little 'obsession' of Sirius's for a few days now. James knew there was no talking to Sirius about something once he had made up his mind about it. "Just make sure you don't get one of us expelled in the process."
Sirius smiled now that he had 'permission' to pursue this. "See you in class, James." Sirius waved at his friend and started walking toward his goal:
Remus J. Lupin.
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Remus beat at his food with his fork, not really wanting to eat it. This was his second year at Hogwarts, and he hated being so alone. It didn't help that he was as shy as he could possibly be, but added to that he had come in late after everyone had already made their little groups of friends which once added to his quiet reclusive nature left Remus utterly lonely. He had his acquaintances, but none ever that stayed around for long; when a semester ended, it was like parting ways. Which led him to now; two weeks into his third year and he was quite miserable.
He chewed some of his meal then put the fork aside, sighing deeply. He had the sudden feeling of eyes upon him and he turned his head to the side to find Sirius Black looking his way. His eyes widened a bit, then he quickly turned away, feeling some blood going to his cheeks. He shook his head and stared at his plate.
It wasn't the first time that this had happened, that he had discovered that Black kid just gazing at him. Sometimes Remus worried. Sirius Black had a reputation for being a trouble-maker. What if Sirius wished to make a mark out of him?
Because that's the last thing he needed to make his life officially miserable… a bully.
He stared at his plate long and hard, then eventually pushed it aside, not feeling hungry anymore. He almost stood and left the Great Hall, but thought better of it and remained there. He would have gone to the library until first period started, but he just wasn't in the mood to have the librarian look at him with pity, he hated that.
People around him moved and left, but Remus just stayed put, wishing the bell would just ring already. Someone sat beside him and poked his arm. Remus turned and stared, his eyes going wide, a little fear falling over them.
"It's Remus, isn't it?" Sirius asked with a hint of a grin to his lips.
Remus could only nod, his worst fear realized.
He swallowed hard as he stared into Sirius's grinning face, wishing with all his might for the other boy to leave.
'Why me?' Remus asked himself. 'And why Sirius Black, of all people?' His reputation preceded him, rowdy, liking to be the center of attention, and Remus couldn't afford that. What he needed were quiet friends, friends that would not wonder why he went missing once a month. Sirius Black would notice, Remus just knew it.
"Yes," he answered softly at Sirius's query. Sirius's grin got even wider as he sat beside Remus. For a second Remus had the urge to bolt, but he forced his feet to stay still and his butt to stay glued to the chair.
"You're a third year, right?" was Sirius's next question, and Remus nodded. "What class are you taking next?"
"Um," Remus muttered, "Defense against the Dark Arts."
"Really?" Sirius smiled. "Me too! I don't remember seeing you there, though."
Remus lowered his eyes and looked at his watch. Five minutes until the class started. "I tend to sit in the corner in the back."
"Well, that doesn't work," Sirius replied in a low voice.
"Excuse me?"
"Oh, nothing," Sirius said with a grin.
Remus went back to staring at his plate, his fingers shifting nervously underneath the table where Sirius couldn't see them. He was thinking up rational excuses to excuse himself when the bell rang, and Remus, without even glancing at Sirius, picked up his bag, stood, and left. He walked out of the dining room and down the hall. Halfway along the corridor, he glanced back and spotted the top of Sirius's head as he made his way through the mass of students and avoided a few girls that crossed his path. The boy was tall for his age, and Remus had yet to have his growth spurt. The classroom was already half full when he finally got there, and he quickly headed toward his usual spot, but before he could put his bag down a hand snatched his shoulder.
"Remus! I thought we were going to the class together, didn't you see me following you?" Sirius asked hastily.
Remus stood there quietly for a second, then frowned. "Yes, I saw you," he answered bluntly. Someone did say that honesty was the best policy, and if this once it could get Sirius Black off his back, then so be it.
Sirius blinked, then just stared, totally speechless. Remus stared back with a glare. "Remus," he began, trying to fix the crumbling situation. He knew that if he left now, this boy would never speak to him again, would never be his friend, no matter what. Sirius did not want that, he knew from the small pang he felt at the pit of his stomach. For some strange reason still unknown to him, he wanted Remus as a friend.
"Listen," Remus shot back, "I don't know you, and you don't know me, and to be honest the rumors I've heard about you are not very flattering."
Sirius frowned, meeting the shorter boy's gaze. "Calm down, mate," he replied hastily. "I just thought that maybe you'd like to hang out sometime, have some fun." Remus looked away for a second and Sirius felt the urge to rest his hand on the brunette's shoulder, but he thought better of it. Physical contact could be the last intrusion that would send Remus running.
There was silence, and Remus still looked away, apparently lost in thought. Sirius waited patiently, noticing how Remus's hair seemed to get paler in some corners, almost as if they were graying… His eyes must be playing a trick on him.
"Okay."
Sirius blinked. Remus was now looking at him with honey eyes. Then a big grin formed slowly on his face as he registered what Remus had just said. "Perfect!" he exclaimed happily. 'Yes!' Sirius's stomach did a happy flip. This was him; instinct told him that Remus was it. For a long time now Sirius was hoping to expand his and James's little club, but the right person never seemed to exist. They needed someone with brains; someone their age, preferably from their own house; someone who would not rat them out. When Sirius had first laid eyes on Remus as they were boarding the Hogwarts express, his inner voice had gone all happy and said, 'That one! That's the one you want,' and he trusted his instincts.
Sirius grabbed Remus's wrist and pulled him away, the grin never leaving his face.
"Oi! Where are we going?" Remus yelped as he was being dragged away from his usual spot, barely having time to grab his books.
"To sit with James, of course," Sirius said happily, as if that explained everything.
Remus couldn't help feeling a little agitated at the notion, but he allowed himself to be dragged nonetheless. Sirius pulled him across the entire classroom, gaining everyone's attention in the process and earning them a whistle or two, which provoked Remus's cheeks to burn. It felt like forever, but Sirius finally stopped on the opposite end of the room, and Remus spotted another boy, the one who always hung around Sirius, the one with the ruffled hair and the glasses:
James Potter; prankster extraordinaire.