Chapter 2: You cut my strings and let me fall...

(Disclaimer: I have ONLY read saiyuki 1 and 2 and have ONLY! Seen the first dvd of the anime series. DO NOT FLAME ME FOR EVENTS OR BEHAVIOR OF SHA GOJYO) Thank you.

Much applause to my Beta-reader buddy sarin for helping me out! Wings Of Steel...Fly Higher

Words slice through my body, But I hear Nothing. Punches land and crimson falls, But I feel Nothing. Gestures and stares are thrown But I see Nothing. An anonymous liquid fills my mouth, But I taste Nothing. This is what I truly am...
I,
Am

Nothing

It's been weeks since I last went through that hellhole they call 'school'. Now my head is filled with these thoughts 'I'm nothing, I'm nothing, I'm nothing. "But I want to be SOMETHING!" I yell slamming my small fists into the wall. I can feel blood falling form my cracked knuckle, the force of punching the wall nearly breaking it. "I want to be some-ONE..." silent tears fall to the ground, and my hunger rises once more, the pain from it makes me double over. Now I am on the floor, face covered in tears and hands wrapped around my stomach. I feel possessed by this, in my mind I chant 'I hunger, I hunger, I hunger...'

This home is also full of hate, the only person who seems to care about me, is my brother... He used to tell me he'd always be there. I believe him, but I'm probably just setting my self up for a greater fall. Just the thoughts that I get from my brother's demeanor sends chills down my spine.

He doesn't understand, to be the taboo child, the one everybody despises. Because he is a full blood youkai, he doesn't face the constricting strings of the world, he doesn't have to feel the pain and utter loathing I do. This is all I can think, as I lay lifelessly on the cold and unforgiving hard floor. Hell, he doesn't even live with us; he has no idea, no matter how hard he tries.

I just want to lie there for the rest of my life where no one can ever bother me, but I know for a fact it's not possible. Why? Because even though I am nothing to those around, they still see me as the scapegoat, for the taboo child can always count on being blamed for something they never did.

I pull myself up, ignoring the pangs of blood lust from deep within me. I can't let go...I can't give them an another reason to hate me, another reason to taunt and rape my mind, traumatize me or scar me. I can't...

The world fades to black...

"Kenren..."

"Nghh...Shut up, Tenpou, trying to...sleep..."

"Kenren Taisho! Get up!"

I jump up at the slightly familiar voice, but I place it. My mind is swimming, who is Kenren Taisho? Who is Tenpou?