Okay. First off, after much beating down of the other plot bunnies, I bring you…

Slash!

Overlay: Alia thinks Dynamo is… well, Dynamo, and has about romantic sense as a twig. Cue him noticing that a certain Hunter has been single for a while, and we have a target for him to prove his matchmaking skills. Throw in X doing a 180 and I think Zero is pretty screwed…

-In other news: I own nothing. I don't even own the title; I just thought it would be cute here. The characters and such belong to Capcom. ;

Chapter One: When suspicion is your FRIEND

Step one: Identify the couple to be.

You know, you'd think that a Commander, what with a unit that still needed to learn how to work together, forms to fill out, and people to meet, would have something better to do. But no, that got old fast, and besides, there was a sudden bout of peace that had everyone taking a break. They all dealt with it in their own ways; X was developing a lovely tan (lucky bastard and his 'I'm-going-to-make-you-as-human-as-possible creator.) that many a hunter gawked at (Or maybe it was the sight of him in swimming shorts that was being gawked at) Zero had tried forcing practice as normal only to be met with enough resistance and whining to even make him call it off. After that, there were the drinking sprees (Of which he dragged X along) and then he fell back into routine.

That is, flirting. Gratuitously. With just about everything in sight… or as Zero himself put it, not everything in sight. It has to think. And move. In other words, if you were a Hunter, you were a possible target. Obviously, given his long blond tresses, gorgeous cocky grin and superior height that was perfect for cuddling (Or so everyone claimed) there were few who complained.

And then there was his current situation. Dynamo did not take attacks to his pride well, especially when a certain someone thought that he was about as romantic as a rock. Or a cow, or… some other creature that didn't have much romantic sense.

Looking up from his list, he tapped his pencil next to the check box while he scanned the crowd. Of all the hapless hunters running to and fro, who was most deserving of his intervention? Of his mad skillz of love? Of- well, you get the point.

Well, he could definitely pair himself up with just about anyone here. What? He just wasn't that picky a guy. If you want to misinterpret that as being a player that's your business.

Then again, he'd probably go through one a week… Okay, now feel free to hit him for being a pimp.

Actually, if you wanted to beat anyone for being a pimp, Zero was nearby flirting with some random giggly spotter in his lap. He'd had the foresight to be out of armor, and if Dynamo started a countdown he could probably predict when she would start going for his neck.

Play Boys aside… Actually, there were a surprising number of couples at the base already. He blamed it on the bout of peace they'd hit, and expected it to change soon. Then again, that would make the resident pacifists unhappy, as well as tick off the commanders as it would kill their leisure time dead.

Speaking of little pacifists…

Out of the corner of his eye, he spied X and Douglas sitting at a corner table, discussing god knew what but knowing them, and judging from the way X elaborated with his hands, it was something political.

X and Douglas… No. He caught the mental images before they could run rampant and stuck them in a corner of his mind labeled, 'thoughts that will scar'. No way, wouldn't work, besides Douglas had a wife already and even if X had been interested, he wasn't the home wrecker type. He marked down the two names and put 'friends' next to it.

Douglas had a wife… but wasn't X single right about now?

Then again, hadn't X been single for a while now? Dynamo blinked at the thought. Why yeeees, he was, and not due to a lack of effort on the part of about half the base. Obviously the Hunter was smitten with someone and just couldn't bring himself to admit it… or the person wasn't interested, thought that right there was a shock to the system if you just looked at him, or if you'd known him for a while. Or maybe she was already taken, and go back to the whole, 'I'm-too-good-to-home-wreck' thing and there you go. And if he'd been pining after this person for so long, it was only his obligation as a decent Reploid to help!

And as Zero hadn't done anything for him to date (Read: Zero had enough self-preservation instinct to back the hell off) it was his duty to help poor X!

Never mind it would be payback for all of the… tactical retreats. (Read: Times he'd run away like a coward, etc.) Not that he was bitter or anything. He was above being petty just because he knew that X could hand him his ass whenever he felt like it. He was above being upset that an outdated, whiny pacifist had made him run with his tail between his legs on several occasions.

So of course he wouldn't be doing this out of spite!

He mentally started a list of ways to 'help'.

Step One: Check. Kind of. He had his target; he just needed to find the other half so he could begin operation 'Moonbeam'.

Yes, he was perfectly sane, thank you. All operations had to have code names so no one could crack them. That was one of the basics of spy/sneaky work, and giving it a ridiculous name not only made it harder to crack, it annoyed whoever was attempting to.

And Dynamo was nothing if not an annoyance.

Step Two: Devise plot to make A fall for B.

-In the process of finding B.

Step Three: Begin actual plot

Pending.

Step Four: Gloat to Alia.

Pending.

Ah Alia, gorgeous creature with the personality of an irate dragon. Not only would he get to screw with X's mind before this was over, he would get to prove that he did have more romantic sense than a stick.

Grumble grumble.

"…Did you say something, Dynamo?" X asked, blinking up at the Merc turned Hunter, hands still up in mid emphasis.

"Ah. Nothing worth repeating." He waved it off and flopped down next to X, grinned and wrapped an arm around his shoulder. Of course, he knew that if his personal space had been breeched, X's had been knocked down and danced upon. In fact, he could see X going into defense mode; i.e., his shoulders tensed, his eyes narrowed juuust a smidgen, and his posture wasn't slouched anymore.

The giggles nearby died down just a little. Not that he registered it that well.

"Dynamo."

"Yes X dear?"

"Remove your arm before you find it charred off."

"You wound me with your words! Why do you deny my love?!" He mock swooned, before the customary grin was back in full effect, and there was something in that look that X did not trust. In fact, his little warning bells were hitting him over the head. "So tell me who my rival is."

"…Excuse me?" Well, whatever he had expected, that hadn't been it.

"This person who is taking my place in your heart!" Again, the dramatics, but hey, it got the job done. The slight blush that it drew out was worth it alone.

"I'm afraid that you're confused, Dynamo. I'm not seeing anyone at the moment."

"Ah, but you would like to be."

If it had been any deader, he might have chirped like a cricket. Even the random spotter was quietly watching and Zero gave him a look that said, 'if I have to get up you're a dead man' before re-directing her attention with a few well chosen whispers.

He didn't even want to know what he'd said to start the giggling again… actually, then again…

X just raised an eyebrow at him, not that he could see it under the helmet. Speaking of which, he decided then and there that it would be easier to read X if he could get him in civilian clothing. That and he couldn't, ya know, blast him if he caught on to what he was doing.

"What are you talking about?"

"Are you going to sit there and tell me that there isn't…?" He trailed off, but the meaning was clear.

"Of course there isn't."

Customary Grin back in place, though it looked more like a leer, he leaned in a little closer than he had before, dancing on the grave of X's personal space. "WELL. In that case, would you like to be my date this fine evening?"

"No."

"Aw… but-"

"No."

"How about-"

"NO. I'm above flings with co-workers and besides, aren't you after Alia?"

"Of course I am. In fact, they're taking bets in when I'll get her over there-" He gestured flippantly at a nearby table where Hunters were crunching numbers. Hey, peace time, people were bored and even betting on the love life of colleagues was better than nothing. "But you have to follow your heart where it leads you." He batted his eyelashes. "And at the moment, it's telling me…"

He sighed dramatically, hopped up and rummaged around in a little compartment in his armor for a moment. "That I forgot to give you something."

The little bells of doom were performing their own little symphony. "…Why?" It wasn't suspicious at all. Never mind how he drew it out, or how Dynamo couldn't see the raised eyebrows, or… okay, so maybe it was suspicious. You didn't live around Dynamo for long without learning that you had to at least be wary of him at all times or face a prank or worse.

"Your B-day, of course." Conveniently it had been recent, un-conveniently, recent meant a month ago and he had given him a present on the day of. Then again, when you gave someone a present that had enough meth- er, happy dust in it to run the Energizer Bunny for a month, they're bound to be a little paranoid. Add in the fact that he had merrily pranced around the base with Axl in tow, and had to actually admit the little bugger was fun, and he was more likely to send anything Dynamo gave him to the chemical labs for investigation.

"You already gave me that rather… 'Special' candy, Dynamo." He shuddered at the memory. Karaoke over the intercom, chicken grease in the air vents, decorating the halls with old Halloween props… and all throughout this, Zero had been running around trying to figure out where the heck they were.

"That was just to tide you over until this came!" He chirped happily, pulling out a conveniently green jade dragon on a leather strip. Nothing too flashy or girly, something that just about anyone would wear. Grin still in place, he handed it to the –still- suspicious X, who started at it like it was going to bite him or something.

"Neeeeeeeeeeee X!" Someone chirped happily. A little too happily, and Dynamo winced as a blur of blue and orange ran over and attached itself to X's back.

Glomp

"What'cha got?" Axl asked, peering over his shoulder before snatching the jade dragon up, cheerfully ignoring the astonished looks of the other table's occupants, and the fact that X looked like he was worried that too much motion might make it explode. "Oh… lucky! A Chinese dragon, isn't that the symbol of luck and health? And Jade wards off evil, right?" He bobbed his head as he said so, looking curiously at the pendant before returning it to its rightful owner. "Who'd give you something like that?" Dynamo cheered inwardly and made a note to not prank Axl for at least a week.

"Er-" He could feel his face absolutely burn, and cursed the guilty blush reflex. "Dynamo. Late birthday present."

"…That's funny. I thought he had given you, you know, that ah… 'Special' candy?" He even did the air quotations with his fingers. Dynamo made a mental note to put the 'special' candy on the market since it was this infamous.

"…If you both considered that a real present, I'm scared" He shook his head in mock shame, before putting a hand to Axl's shoulder and sitting him down rather forcibly, ignoring the yelp of protest. "That was a 'tide me over' thing!" He pronounced cheerfully, only to be met with two glares and a stare of disbelief. "Okay… ignoring the obvious fact that that was a prank, won't you take this instead? Honestly, do you think I'm always up to no good?" And this would decide it: Whether or not X would believe him. He finished his speech with closed eyes and a non-plotting/lecherous/malicious smile on his face. Something that had been seen only three times since his stay at the Hunters.

X wasn't as naïve as he used to be. That was a fact, and Dynamo knew it. But at the same time, he did have a rather trusting nature that time and experience had yet to kill off. "Er… Of course we don't. I'll wear it under my armor."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Awwww" He wiped a fake tear away. "I always knew you loved me!" He proclaimed happily, hopping into X's lap.

Needless to say, this caused a few things to happen. One, X developed the cutest little pink patch across his nose, that Dynamo leaned forward to peck. Two, One was done on limited time, as he could hear the indignant shout of the protective friends and the one that was becoming-a-friend. Three, he grinned E-v-i-l-l-y at the sight of wide green eyes and pinched X's cheek, cooed, and hopped up and out the door before Zero stormed over and Axl could shoot.

"..Damn innocent bystanders." He muttered, hearing an agreement from all Buster-toting Hunters in ear shot.

A/N

Okay okay. Needs work, obviously, but I'm a writer in training. ; Read and Review please? I'll try to update at least weekly.