Title: Which Head?

Author: Mairi Nathaira

Rating: PG-13

Category: Humour, Romance, Established Relationship

Notes: After hanging out with two of my friends, that title became the phrase of the night.  Thanks to Dawn and Titti for betaing!

Summary: Draco finds a new way to annoy Ron.

Pairing: DM/RW

Warnings: Slash

Dedications: To my two crazy friends.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to Warner Brothers and the wonderful JK Rowling. I do not own them, despite the fact I wish I could own SS, RL, and SB. The only thing that belongs to me is the story itself.

Feedback: mairiaigoo-chamna.net All comments and criticisms are welcomed there. If it's flame then don't bother for I will put them in my trashcan or blog about it and laugh at you.

Draco decided Ron needed some new clothes.  With the money they had both saved up, they went shopping in the most fashionable stores available in Diagon Alley.  It wasn't as if Draco needed to save his money, but he did so anyways to put Ron at ease.  Ron wasn't used to being rich yet.  The store Draco led Ron into was a place Ron had never set foot in before.  He looked around and saw how empty it was compared to the second-hand clothing store he usually went to with his family.

"Draco, why do I need new clothes?  The ones I have now are fine."  Ron did not want to be here.  He didn't like the snobby, rich atmosphere of the store.

Draco plucked a piece of lint off of his impeccable robe before looking up and answering.  "Ron, we are going to a social function.  Normally I'd turn down the invitation, but considering how my father is hosting this function, I didn't have the heart to turn it down.

"Besides, Ron, I am in the mood for some new clothing myself.  I think I've worn most of my outfits twice already."

Ron rolled his eyes.  "You can't spare to wear something more than two times?"

"No, of course not.  I have a reputation to maintain.  Quit complaining."  Draco stopped and tugged his lover closer.  He stood on his tiptoes (Ron was several inches taller than him) and whispered silkily into Ron's ear.  "You love the way I look, so in order to look even more gorgeous than I am, I need more outfits."

Ron's ears turned crimson, and with a suppressed growl, he gently pushed Draco away.  "As much as I would love for you to seduce me now, I do not think the people in this store would appreciate our activities."

Nodding, Draco stepped back.  He took Ron's hand and led him over to the hat section.  "Help me select a hat."

"Why," Ron asked with confusion written on his face, "do you need a hat?" 

"The function is outdoors.  It's windy.  I do not want my hair to blow all over the place.  Besides, I want something to cover up my face a little bit so I don't lose my porcelain complexion."

"A simple spell would work…"

"That is true."  Draco rolled his eyes.  "But I want a hat.  Never had one before really, so I want to take the opportunity to have one now."

Ron scanned over the collection of hats displayed in front of him.  "Something that will keep his hair in place and keep the sun out of his face… which hat would do the trick?"  Muttering to himself, Ron studied each hat in front of him.

"Ah-ha!"  With a smile of satisfaction, Ron reached over for the perfect hat.

Draco, in the meantime, was looking at the robes section.  He wasn't paying attention to where Ron was looking.  When he heard Ron's "ah-ha", he turned back to the hats section.  Only because of his upbringing did he not almost scream and run out of the building.  Instead he kept a straight face and smirked to himself – for an idea had come to him.

"Uh, nice, Ron."  Draco looked at the hat Ron had selected.  The hat resembled the Buckingham Palace Guard hat.  It had a visor sticking out from the side of the opening, so he could see why Ron chose it since it would keep the sun out of his face.  Draco choked back a laugh as he thought of what the hat kind of resembled…

Ron handed it to him and said, "Try it on."

Smirking, Draco replied, "Which head?"

"Wha…?"  Caught off guard, it took a moment for the comment to sink through Ron's brain.  "…Your head, Draco."

"I know, but which head?"

"You, you… you know!"  Ron sputtered.  "The one with the hair!"

"I hate to break this to you, Ron, but both heads have hair, sort of. Be more specific."  Draco inwardly sniggered to himself.

Blushing, Ron continued to stumble over his words.  "The … head … where you would put a hat!!"

"Oh?"  Raising an eyebrow, Draco pretended to study the hat critically.  "Considering the shape of the hat, I think I can wear it on both heads, love."

"…What?"  Ron looked at the hat in his hand.  If possible, his blush deepened to an even darker shade of crimson.  "I see…"

"So, which head, Ron?"  Draco continued to tease his lover mercilessly.

Ron contemplated on what to say next.  With a triumphant grin he said, "The one with the brain!"

"Haven't you heard, Ron?  That both heads have brains since they think for themselves?"

Growling, Ron took the hat in both of his hands and yanked it a little bit forcefully down on Draco's head.

"I meant that one!"  Ron stepped back.  Soon he was shaking his head.  "That hat is not you.  Draco, give it up, I cannot find a hat that would suit you.  Just use a spell."

Draco took off the hat and smoothed his hair out.  "Fine."  Leaving the hat behind, Draco walked out of the store and apparated home.  Ron followed him and arrived in his lover's arms.  Draco wrapped his arms around Ron tightly.

"I'll use a spell…"

Ron nuzzled into Draco's finely combed hair, which was a little bit messed up from the hat.  "Okay."

"I'll use a spell," Draco repeated, "but on which head?"

Ron growled again, and he pushed Draco into the bedroom to use appropriate means of punishment on his infuriating lover.

Words: 927

Completed June 27, 2004