Disclaimer: sigh why must you people force me to do this? IT'S SO HEART WRENCHING!!!

Kagome: pats me on the back as I cry hesterically it's okay Heather

Inuyasha: AWWW SUCK IT UP!!!

scene fades as me and Kagome pounce on him

Summary: Inuyasha's thoughts on Ep. 48 (Return to the Place Where We First Met). For those of you who are new, it's when Inuyasha chooses Kikyou and this is my story on how he begins to regret it, ONE-SHOT, DON'T WORRY, there's still hope, I can't give it all away, but it's not THAT sad. Umm..I don't know how many of you have seen the first Inuyasha movie, but he REALLY showed his feelings for Kagome and this is how he's gonna act kay?

Because You Loved Me

Inuyasha sat in his tree and let the evening breeze drown him. Why couldn't he sleep? He closed his eyes trying to let sleep overcome him. Nothing. Was it because of the events that had occured lately? Maybe he sensed danger. But his heart told him otherwise.He closed his eyes and scenes from the last couple days played in his head like a movie. First thing he remembered was her face after Kikyou had left, so sad, so terrified, he could have said that she was Kikyou at that moment from her frale and devastated expression. All he could have done was tell her the truth,"Kagome.." he started..but she ran, she didn't want to hear it. After she left,a million questions ran through his head on whether she was coming back or if that was the last picture of her left in his mind forever: full of sorrow. He squeezed his eyes tighter, it was heart wrenching, knowing he was the cause of her pain.

For all those times you stood by me

For all the strength that you made me see

For all the joy you brought to my life

For all the wrong that you made right

For every dream you made come true

He looked down at her sleeping form and noticed that she still looked like her same beautiful self, though he could still see the pain in her features. The one thing he had always loved about her was her smile and cheerful mood and it always brought him up, but now he couldn't bear the thought of knowing that he was the one that took that away. He jumped down softly and looked down at her as he stroked her face tenderly. He turned his face from her and jumped back in the tree, not turning to look at her, he couldn't take it. He rested back in his spot and closed his eyes once more. He still couldn't sleep. Again the scenes flashed through his mind. He remembered feeling her presence when she was about to go into the well(A/N: when she was in her time)..but instead she stayed back and he knew at that moment that she was gone. But just when he couldn't take it anymore, just when he had had enough of her being gone and was about to go get her, there she was. As he walked out to the well, she was right there and at that moment, he felt his heart skip a beat. She had come for him.

For all the love I found in you

I'll be forever thankful baby

You're the one who held me up

Never let me fall

You're the one who saw me through it all

But when he saw her face he couldn't say a word. Her eyes were saddened and red from lack of sleep and she just looked as though she didn't care anymore. It was the first time he saw her really sad. When she had looked at him he could barely look her straight in the eye, it was hard to bear. But his hopes went up once more when he heard her say "..the desire to be with you again." She had told him that both her and Kikyou were so unlike eachother and that though they shared the same soul they were completely different people and the only thing that connected them was that they both had the desire to be with him. All those things she told him that had happened in her time almost made him tip over and he felt like a little pup, not worth it.

She was always there for him and he only rejected her, just put her down, never appreciated the things she'd done for him. Though he wouldn't admit it out loud, she was almost always very brave, she even spoke some things that he couldn't say aloud. In a way, she played his eyes. She always saw things on their good side when he saw the worst in them just like she had always seen the best in him. She had always liked him the way he was, he was just Inuyasha to her, human or half-breed she even liked him in his demon form, though she was scared of that form. She had always had hope for him, no matter what, and that was what seemed to trigger his fighting ability, it was actually kind to know that she was his faith.

You were my strength when I was weak

You were my voice when I couldn't speak

You were my eyes when I couldn't see

You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach

You gave me faith 'cause you believed

But an even bigger obstacle came when he came to the two sides in the path on whether to ask her to leave or ask her to stay. But he knew, he couldn't be selfish and make her stay, because he knew it would be too much for her to stay. She then asked him if she could stay. Stay. With him. He couldn't believe it. She had told him she wouldn't leave him before, but he was sure she would leave him for this. But she stayed. Stayed. With him. He couldn't ever get tired of hearing that.

Kagome turned her back to the tree that hewas sitting in. She wasn't going to cry over him this time, but her heart told her otherwise as she felt one single tear rolled down her cheek but she still smiled at the thought of Kikyou. Kikyou. The real subject of the situation. She couldn't help but smile over the thought of her, she was her incarnation after all. Even after all the times that she had tried to kill her and take Inuyasha away to hell with her, in a way, she needed to thank her.

"What would I do without you, Kikyou." she smiled. If it wasn't for her, Kagome would have never met the love of her life. She turned and looked up at Inuyasha in the tree but quickly had to turn. Why? Why couldn't she look at him? But she knew, it hurt her to look at someone that she loved so much that didn't share the same feelings. She turned back and cried int her pillow...

Inuyasha squeezed his eyes tighter and turned his head away from her, trying to shut out the smell that stung his nose: tears. He wished he didn't have that ability to smell these things, it hurt. He closed his eyes and tried once again to make it go away. But it wouldn't go away. That smell that he hated so much just wouldn't go away.

"Inuyasha?"

His eyes shot open and he looked down to see Kagome standing and looking up at him teary-eyed. He jumped down quickly and embraced her, taking in her scent of cherry blossoms and strawberries. She tugged at his outer haori(is that how u spell it?) and cried harder into his chest until she slipped her arms aroung his neck and he put his arms around his waist. Once she was down to a sniffle he put his arms on her shoulders and separated from her, looking into her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Kagome, I'm so sorry" he whispered.

She nodded and smiled weakly, "I just noticed the look on your face and I knew you were thinking about the last couple days.." she shook her head and gave him a real smile "It's not your fault, I understand that you can't stay away from her, I just.." she sighed "couldn't hold it in anymore, so I'm sorry, for causing you and Kikyou problems."

I'm everything I am

Because you loved me

She cocked her head up slightly and looked him in the eyes and gave him the best smile she could, but he knew she was hurting on the inside. "I'm happy to see you two toge-that's a lie." Inuyasha cut her off before she could finish. "Don't say that, I know it's not true." he looked down and let his bangs cover his eyes, "Just please, please don't lie about how you feel, it's not worth it, I know what you're going through and I'm sor-" but he heard a small thud and looked down to see Kagome on her knees crying hesterically into her hands. He sighed 'Oh no, Inuyasha now look at what you've done you jerk.' he knelt down and brought her chin up with his fingers and looked her straight in the eyes, "Look, Kagome, I know I fucked up, and there's no excuse for that, but there is no doubt in my mind that I care about you and I don't want you to doubt it either, I know that it will take some time for you to forgive me, but until then, I'm willing to try my best if you are." he gave her a warm genuine smile that she had never seen in him before.

Her tears had stopped but began to form in her eyes again. "Oh no, K-kagome, please don't cry, I-i'm sorry, I-" but he stopped when she looked up and smiled, he took her hands in his and stood up, still holding her hands. They looked sadly into eachothers eyes and she smiled warmly at him with tearfilled eyes. He brought his hand up to her face and touched it softly but stopped when she quickly turned her head away from him and closed her eyes tightly, tears springing from her eyes. He put his hands down and looked down sadly. She was still hurt. He couldn't believe it.

"Inuyasha, I'll be okay, I just..need some time." He smiled a little but looked down, "It's just..hard..knowing that I was the one that hurt you, and there's nothing I can do about it.." his voice drifted off and he looked away as if deep in thought. How could he do this to her? She had done so much for him and he hurt her, what could he do now? She always helped rise his spirit and told him he could do anything and, in a way, he could do that because of her.

You gave me wings and made me fly

You touched my hand I could touch the sky

I lost my faith you gave it back to me

You said no star was out of reach

They both stood there, holding eachother, not wanting to let go, both deep in thought. Kagome couldn't help but still wonder if she should stay or leave, other than the shards, did she really have a purpose there? Inuyasha just looked at her and could almost see what she was thinking. Did she really have to stay there? He always seemed stronger with her around, but maybe he could go without her? No. He shook his head barely, he needed her. "Kagome, please, I know this is selfish but I need you with me, I need you by my side, so, will you stay with me?" she quickly nodded, "I couldn't ever leave you." they stood there smiling at eachother for a moment. At that moment he realized how blessed he was to have her by his side, and he always treated her like crap, then he made that promise to himself that he would treat her better. He thought right, he would need her with him, always. He was better off with her.

You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love I had it all

I'm grateful for each day you gave me

Maybe I don't know that much

But I know this much is true

I was blessed because I was loved by you

She really was his strength. She spoke for him when he couldn't. She saw the good in people that he didn't. She saw the good in him that not even Kikyou had seen. She was that boost that told him to fight when he almost gave in. She was his faith because of what she believed when he didn't believe. He became who he was standing there at that moment because of her.

You were my strength when I was weak

You were my voice when I couldn't speak

You were my eyes when I couldn't see

You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach

You gave me faith 'cause you believed

I'm everything I am

Because you loved me

With that she raised her calves on her tiptoes and planted a soft kiss on his lips and settled herself in her sleeping bag, while Inuyasha stood there dumbfounded and raised his hand up and touched his lips with his fingertips softly and smiled slightly. Once he thought she was asleep, he went over to her and kissed her on the cheek softly, "I love you, Kagome, thanks to you, I now know that I belong somewhere." and he gently brushed her bangs back and began to walk into the night....

Kagome opened her eyes slightly and watched as he began to walk away but he stopped, not turning around, a smirk rising to his lips "I love you, Inuyasha." she stood and walked over to him, taking his hand, smiling up at him and they walked together into the forest. "You ruined the plan, you know that?" he looked down at her expecting an answer. "And what was the plan?" she put her free hand on her hip. "I was supposed to walk into the night and you'd think I was gone until the morning." she giggled and leaned her head on his shoulder. He closed his eyes and a smile curled on his lips. She was his strength. She was his weakness. She was his voice. She was his eyes. She was his faith and he would never let her go.

Soooooo? D'ya like it? It is better then my last Inuyasha fic you have to admit! Ummm... that wasn't the whole song so here's the rest of it :

You were always there for me

The tender wind that carried me

A light in the dark shining your love into my life

You've been my inspiration

Through the lies you were the truth

The world is a better place because of you

..then you repeat the chorus twice. Anyways, I hope you liked it! If you did, please review! I know, I know, you don't wanna, I never wanna either, but please! Have a nice..uh..fall? Bless!

Kitty.