Gentleman, behold!

I… have finally submitted chapter fourteen!

(Gold star to anyone who gets this reference)

A warning: The end of this chapter veers into M-rated territory. It's nothing too explicit, just pushing the limits of T-rated. Hopefully it doesn't offend anybody :D.

Anyway, I'm just putting that out there so you know what's coming.

Chapter Fourteen: Intoxicating Love

The sun was shining and the birds were singing, but the beautiful spring day was doing nothing to brighten James Potter's mood. Quidditch practice earlier that afternoon… had not gone well.

"Is it really so much to ask that my teammates stay on speaking terms with each other? Has any other captain ever had to deal with this much infighting in the history of the bloody sport? Honestly? What do you think, Moony!"

"Er…"

"Every other week it's some new personal drama! Somebody always has to have a problem with somebody else! It never ends!"

Remus sat at his desk in their dormitory, unsure about how to phrase his response in a way that wouldn't rile James up any further. The disgruntled Quidditch captain's exasperated rant had been going on for near ten minutes now. Peter was watching him anxiously but Sirius appeared to be quite unaffected, lying on his bed and idly tossing and catching his wand.

"Give it a rest, James," he sighed grumpily.

"I would if you would cooperate! Will you finally explain what you and Kylie have been fighting about for the past two weeks?"

"I told you already, it's not important," he replied curtly.

"Look, just tell me what you said to her so we can figure out how resolve whatever the hell it is."

Sirius abruptly stopped tossing his wand and rolled off his bed. "I didn't say or do anything."

"Fine! Then what did Kylie say to you?"

Sirius scoffed. "It's none of your business."

"Of course it is! Anything is my business when it affects the team!"

"Except it doesn't affect the team. Chasers hardly interact with the Seeker, so why is it a problem if we're not speaking?"

"That's deliberately missing the point! You two are bringing your tension with you to the pitch – it's throwing everyone else off their game!"

"That's their problem, not mine."

"Now where are you going?"

"For a bloody walk!" he shouted back, finally losing his cool. He opened the door so forcefully it banged against the wall and disappeared down the spiral staircase.

"Bah!" James exclaimed, one of his legs making a jerking motion as if he unconsciously wanted to kick something. "I have had it up to here with his mood swings!"

Peter blinked. "'Here'? Where's-"

"HERE!" James emphatically gestured with a hand by his face.

The corner of Remus' mouth twitched.

"I swear I'm ready to just give up. I've got a reserve Chaser – Fields! Who says I can't get him in playing form in a few days?"

"But Fields was confined to the hospital wing with a mild case of Dragon pox, remember? He's out of commission for another two weeks at least." Remus pointed out lightly.

James seemed to deflate before their eyes. He collapsed backwards onto his bed, clamping his hands to his head "Okay, now I'm really giving up."

"Tut, tut, Potter," said a voice from the doorway. "That's not like you at all."

James sat up very quickly, eyes narrowed and hair sticking up in every direction. "Evans, this isn't the time or place!"

Lily grinned like a saucy minx. "Come now, you're not still angry about our last counseling session, are you? I thought you took my comments about your lack of skill and virility and inability to… satisfy a woman quite well. Although, I've never seen anyone turn that remarkable shade of red before…"

"E-Evans-!"

"Madam Pomfrey has been so helpful, too," Lily continued, now addressing a very amused looking Remus and Peter and ignoring James' motions of protest. "Offering all these suggestions about curing performance anxiety. I do hope you're taking her advice to heart, Potter."

Remus couldn't help a light grin. "You never mentioned anything about that, James."

There was a notably pink tinge to James' face as he tried to compose himself. "Ha, ha, very funny. Now, as tickled as I am to hear you bringing it all up again, Evans, I'd really prefer that you save the 'performance' jokes for when I'm not facing the disturbingly likely prospect of losing to Hufflepuff."

Lily smiled and leaned against the doorframe, holding up her hands. "Don't worry, Potter. I'm actually here because of your Quidditch team problem."

James raised a brow. "How so?"

"Well, I was going to ask you to make sure Gryffindor wins that match against Hufflepuff this weekend because it seems to be exactly the type of thing that will get Sirius and Kylie in a good enough mood to speak to each other again."

James groaned and flopped back onto his bed again. "Fat chance of that."

"Unfortunately, Lily," explained Remus. "Either outcome is likely impossible without the other happening first."

"Figures," she sighed. "Well… maybe we can work together to try and get those two to mend fences."

"Why do you suddenly care so much about the well-being of the Quidditch team?" asked James curiously.

She rolled her eyes with a laugh. "Surely you've noticed your team isn't the only thing affected by their ongoing fight? You guys' have seen how Sirius has been recently – taking out his anger on anyone who so much as looks at him the wrong way. There's a handful of people in the hospital wing getting de-hexed as we speak, and just now when he came thundering through the common room he inflated two third years' heads. As for Kylie… well, she's miserable. She's pretending not to be, but Taren, Kimmie and I can all tell. And I think she's going to continue being miserable until she and Sirius resolve this. But she's being so stubborn…"

"Has she told you anything about what they're fighting about?" asked Remus.

"Because Sirius hasn't said a word," added Peter.

Lily shook her head. "No. Only that it had to with that fake rumor that Circe Billancourt started. Taren thinks they must have had an argument that just escalated into something else entirely."

"Considering neither of them will tell us what the problem is, I don't think there's much we can do to fix it," spoke up James tetchily.

"Oh you of little faith, of course there is," Lily replied sweetly. "We just have to be creative."

"We could lock them in a room together, couldn't we?" Peter suggested eagerly. "That would force them to talk to each other."

"It would, but there are many ways I can see that idea backfiring, especially knowing those two," said Remus, folding his arms with a frown.

"And Sirius would see it coming from a mile away," smirked James.

"Sounds like more of a last resort option," said Lily. "No, I was thinking a more subtle route would be the way to go…"

They all looked at her expectantly as she paced about the room, brow furrowed in thought. "We could try to talk them down separately, make them less angry at each other by reminding them of the good times. One of my mum's friends is a couples therapist, and that's a method I've heard her talk about a few times."

"But that's for couples," said Peter with a puzzled expression. "Kylie and Sirius aren't dating."

An amused look passed between Lily and Remus. "They might as well be," she said.

"You know, that idea could really work," Remus said thoughtfully. "If their fight really just comes down to a misunderstanding, then they might soften towards each other if we can remind that they are much happier as friends than enemies."

"Great," Lily said brightly. "So let's go with it. You guys do your part with Sirius, and Taren, Kimmie and I will worry about Kylie."

"Wa-wa-wait a minute there, Evans," James said suddenly, sitting up again. "So that's it? I'm no… 'couples therapist', and as far as I know neither is Remus or Pete. Exactly what are we supposed to say to Sirius?"

"How should I know, Potter? You know him far better than I," Lily answered obviously. "I'm sure you guys will come up with something. Just don't to be too transparent about it lest you make him suspicious." She paused, smiling. "Come to think of it, it might be best if you just let Remus handle this. He's far less dense when it comes to this sort of thing."

"Why thank you, Lily."

She grinned at Remus and turned to leave, but James spoke up again.

"Yeah, but you know this doesn't really do my Quidditch problem much good. This plan of yours could take weeks. It may not even work at all."

"What's your point?" she asked.

"My point is that there's not much in it for me to go along with your little plan."
She smiled impishly. "Nice try, Potter, but we both know you want those two to stop fighting as much as I do. It's not like I'm asking a huge favor. Besides you should want to help out your friend who's going to get suspended or worse if he keeps on hexing people left and right."

"…Alright, maybe," James conceded sheepishly.

Lily looked at him for a moment and sighed. "I'll promise to tell Madam Pomfrey in our next session that I made it all up. Is that enough motivation?"

James visibly brightened with a mischievous gleam in his eye. "I'd be even more motivated if you would reverse completely and say that I'm actually amazing in b-"

"Don't push your luck, Potter."

James grinned at Remus and Peter. "Well, it was worth a shot."

"You know," continued Lily. "All you had to do earlier was admit to Madam Pomfrey yourself that we really weren't…"

"Shagging."

This time it was Lily's turn to blush in flustered fashion. "Whatever. I'm just saying you didn't have to sit there and listen to me go on and on. You could have saved yourself a lot of embarrassment."

James' mouth turned up in a crooked, self-deprecating smile. "I can be stubborn too."

"Indeed you can," she said, and there was a trace of fondness in her voice that surprised even her.

There was a beat of silence as they looked at each other, before Lily suddenly remembered that Remus and Peter were in the room – watching their little exchange with amused interest, as a matter of fact. She brushed back her hair awkwardly and headed towards the door.

"Now, as for your Quidditch problem, Potter, all I can say is that a good captain should be able to get his team through anything." She glanced back at him with a teasing wink. "Think of this as an opportunity to prove yourself."

"That's not bad advice," Remus commented after she'd left. "Don't you think, James?"

James was gazing affectionately at the place Lily had stood a moment before and didn't appear to have heard him.

"James?"

"Hmm? Oh… yeah, yeah I guess so."

The following morning found the four girls seated in the Great Hall enjoying their breakfast before classes as usual. On this particular morning, however, Lily, Kimmie and Taren were exchanging meaningful looks, each thinking how to go best go about implementing Lily's plan. The night before, after Kylie had gone to bed early, the three of them had had a discussion over it, particularly about how to strike up the necessary conversation. They'd been unable to come up with an ideal strategy, unfortunately, torn between trying their hands at gentle but slightly underhanded persuasion to just going for a direct approach. Kylie had been so withdrawn that week – it was hard to tell exactly what she was thinking or to gauge how she might react when she realized what they were up to.

They cast uncertain glances at each other across the table again, at the same time pretending to be focused on their food or making idle small talk so Kylie wouldn't notice their odd behavior.

Not that Kylie was paying enough attention to notice anything strange about her friends at the moment. She poked at her scrambled eggs with her fork, staring at the plate with the expression she'd been wearing almost continuously since Monday – it was somber mixed with frustration and anger, a combination that could only hint at the whirlwind of emotions going on beneath the surface.

It was Taren who finally decided to take the initiative, when she saw Kylie look down to the end of the Gryffindor table with that same face. Sirius was down there, of course, and he looked just as taciturn. James and Remus were saying something to him, evidently something he found annoying because he got up a second later to leave. As he did so, his eyes flickered reflexively over to their area of the table to rest on Kylie for the briefest of moments. His jaw tightened and he turned away abruptly, striding out of the Great Hall.

Kylie winced as if in pain, and it was as clear as day to her friends that she was trying not reveal how much that slight had bothered her.

"Kylie, how long are you going to keep this up?" Taren asked in that quiet way of hers.

Kylie looked at her, caught off guard. "Keep up what…?" She faltered, realizing each of her friends was gazing at her now with matching imploring faces. It felt like an intervention.

"Guys…" she began with a sigh.

"You've been down this road before," Taren continued gently. "And you know where it goes. I've lost track of how many times you've been in one of these 'non-speaking terms' phases with Sirius. But they never last." She smiled entreatingly. "You two always end up friends again. And Lily, Kimmie and I think there's a very good reason for that."

Kylie shifted uncomfortably. "Is that right?"

"You like each other," Kimmie stated firmly. Kylie opened her mouth to argue but she kept talking. "I know you don't want to admit it but you do. You enjoy each other's company more than anything. And it's always been that way - even before the Halloween masquerade you guys just… clicked."

"Even more so after you started spending more time with him this year. It took the three of us a while to realize it, but we can all see it now," added Lily. "It's why we don't like seeing you two fighting or letting misunderstandings come between you."

Kylie scowled in irritation. "Why does it matter so much to you guys if he and I are friends or not? Look, friends fight! And sometimes friendships end because of it. Sometimes it's just not meant to be."

"No." Lily shook her head. "No, that's not the case with you and Sirius."

"Why not?"

"Because you're unhappy," Lily replied forcefully. "You hate this situation and you know Sirius hates it too. And as your friends, we don't want to sit around and watch you carry on being unhappy like this."

"I am happy," Kylie said insistently, her jaw set in a stubborn line. "Happy as a clam, in fact."

"Kylie…"

"I've gotten exactly what I wanted, alright? I've wanted Sirius to leave me alone for months and he finally is. I never wanted to… to start anything with him. And I'm glad, no, I'm overjoyed, that I don't have to deal with his bollocks anymore."

She got up, swinging her bag over her shoulder and marched away from the table. Kimmie let out an exasperated sigh.

"This may take a while, guys."

"Don't give up yet, Kim," said Lily as she stood up. "We're getting through to her, I know it."

She hurried into the Entrance Hall where she caught up with Kylie making her way down to the dungeons for their Friday morning Potions class.

"Lily," Kylie began anxiously, when she came up beside her. "Please just drop i-"

"That wasn't true what you said back there, Kylie."

"I told you, I'm-"

"No, listen. If you really never wanted to 'start' anything with Sirius, if you never wanted him in your life, then you never would have come up with a blackmailing scheme that required you to spend hours and hours alone together."

Kylie froze mid-step. She looked at Lily, but quickly found it hard to meet her penetrating green stare.

"But…"

"You would have come up with something else. In fact, you would never have bothered to get yourself in that situation in the first place. You figured out his secret, Kylie. You took the first step that brought him into your life because deep down, it's what you wanted. And you know what? It's what Sirius wanted, too. Oh, I'm sure he grumbled and groaned about those lessons, but let's face it; he could have easily gotten himself out of the deal if he wanted. After you discovered the circumstances, especially about Remus, there was no way you were going turn them in. You both must have known that, even if you didn't acknowledge it. What does it tell you about him that he stayed and put up with teaching you when he didn't have too?"

Kylie folded her arms and said nothing. Her eyes betrayed her conflicting emotions.

"So don't pretend that this is what you want, Kylie," Lily said quietly. "Don't lie to yourself about wanting Sirius in your life, or how much you care that he's not talking to you now."

They looked at each other for a moment, and something in Kylie's demeanor finally seemed to give in a fraction. "What do you want me to do, Lily?"

"Talk to him."

She groaned, ran a hand through her hair and paced about the dungeon corridor in an agitated circle. "It's not that simple. This fight – it was different this time, Lily. The things we said – what I said to him…"

"I'm sure anything you said to him can be undone by a simple apology. He'll forgive you-"

Kylie shook her head. "I don't know that he will." She choked a bit on the last word.

Voices echoed down the hall as the other sixth years Potions students showed up and filed past them towards their classroom. Lily and Kylie looked up just as Sirius appeared, followed closely by James and Remus. A cold glance was all he offered Kylie as he swept by, and a part of her seemed to shrink into the shadows of the wall.

"Kylie…"

"Let's not be late for class, Lily."

The potions dungeon was already teeming in vapors, which meant Professor Hooke had set up cauldrons of demonstration potions again. A dizzying combination of oddly sweet and enticing smells emitted from cauldrons lining the long table in the middle of the classroom, and there were quite a few students sniffing the air interestedly as they proceeded past them.

"Smells like love potions," commented Taren as she and Kimmie sat down at Lily and Kylie's table.

"They can't be," uttered Kimmie under her breath with a grin. "Hooke would never teach us how to make those."

"Well they are apparently on the N.E.W.T. exam," remarked Lily.

"Yes, but we won't have to make one for the practical – I mean most of these potions take ages to brew, sometimes days. We'll probably just have questions about them on the theory exam," added Taren. She leaned forward to catch a whiff of the spirals of steam rising from the cauldron nearest their table. Her eyes widened, blinked rapidly a few times and then took on an almost dreamy look. "Wow, that must be Amortentia."

"Amortentia… really?" gasped Lily. "I've heard about that. It's supposed to be one of the most powerful love potions in the world."

Kimmie grinned. "What's up with you, Taren? You look like you just woke up from a very sexy daydream."

Taren blushed and grinned back. "I can't help it – it's the scent. I'd heard that it's supposed to smell differently to everyone, according to what attracts us. And, well, it's true."

"Ooh, excellent." Kimmie leaned forward as well and inhaled. She flopped back into her chair with a giggle. "Hee hee, that's amazing. I think I can smell every type of men's cologne I've ever liked and… what do you know, chocolate pudding. What about you?"

"Mine smells like green tea, strangely enough. And I think rosemary herbs, and a bit of coconut."

"You're so random, Taren. And how about you, Lily?"

"Nothing that need concern you, Kim," replied Lily, smiling lightly. She glanced at Kylie, noticing that she was eyeing the Amortentia cauldron evasively and trying to lean as far out of reach of the fumes as possible.

Kimmie giggled again. "You're just worried that you're gonna smell James in that potion, aren't you?"

Lily smirked with humor. "Hardly. I don't find overbearing ego to be a particularly attractive odor."

They continued to chat and chortle, but Kylie was too preoccupied to listen. She had a good idea about what she might smell in that love potion, and the prospect of finding out for sure was not an appealing one. She didn't need any reminders about what she found attractive. It would just be depressing.

Professor Hooke came striding into the room at that moment, swiftly shutting the heavy door behind him. "Cease your talking," he barked at the class, already in a bad mood.

Probably due to the love potions, thought Kylie wryly.

"Today we will be examining a selection of potions designed to elicit strong, emotional reactions ranging from affection to extreme, obsessive ardor, most commonly referred to as love potions." Hooke's face was sour, no doubt because articulating words like 'ardor' and 'love' didn't come easy to him. "I personally don't find much stock in them, but there is a very high probability that you will be tested on them in your N.E.W.T. examinations so it falls upon me to prepare you for that eventuality. If it was up to me to set the content of the examination it'd be another story entirely but…" He trailed off with a scowl. "Now, I require that everyone stand and file past each of the cauldrons before you, and inhale every one. Go on, no dawdling!"

Chairs scraped the stone floor and robes rustled as each student got to their feet and lined up on each side of the table as Hooke continued lecturing.

"Most love potion recognition comes from scent because they do not differ much in appearance and nearly all of them can be mixed with ordinary beverages without losing their potency. Take note of each brew's smell carefully so that you remember it. And no one, I repeat, no one is to swipe so much as a flask for your own personal use! Be assured that anyone caught doing so will get detention for the rest of the month! Now, you will start with the most potent potion, Amortentia, which you will notice carries a unique scent for everyone…"

Kylie tuned Hooke out when it was her turn by the Amortentia, and she hesitantly closed her eyes as she gently breathed in the silvery vapors. A feeling of warm, cozy contentment washed over her instantly, and the sensation was not unlike slipping into a hot bubble bath. And the scent… She caught the comforting smell of the pages of a brand new book cracked open for the first time, the honey-like aroma of broomstick varnish, and a woodsy, musky scent which she recognized to be all Sirius. It was his hair, his skin, his aftershave…

She exhaled slowly, feeling quite light-headed. By chance her eyes strayed across the table to spot Sirius, who was just at that moment reaching the cauldron as well. A stray thought darted across her mind, wondering – hoping? - if he could smell something that reminded him of her in that cauldron. He appeared a little dazed and distracted for a second, just as affected as everyone else in the room. But it did not seem to have contented him one bit.

He blinked and looked up to catch her watching him, and she quickly turned away, embarrassed. Just a fool's hope…

Sirius was rapidly wishing this trying day could be over. First, his three friends had spontaneously become nostalgic about their past years at Hogwarts, and had been regaling each other loudly about all those 'good times' from the moment they'd gotten out of the bed and all the way through breakfast. Now, normally this wouldn't be that strange. The four of them occasionally reminisced about all their past pranks, adventures and misdeeds and got a good laugh out of them.

But Sirius wasn't in the reminiscing mood, especially if the only stories James, Remus and Peter wanted to talk about were ones that somehow involved Kylie.

Like the day of their first flying lesson, when he and James got into a showdown with some of the Slytherin first years about who had the best flying skills while Madam McKinch was fortuitously distracted by an injured student. A midnight Quidditch challenge was hatched to settle the matter, which involved sneaking out that night, breaking into the broom shed and meeting at the pitch for the match. Kylie was the only other Gryffindor, in fact the only girl, brave enough to take part. He'd barely known her at that point, and had actually been annoyed that she'd shown up, thinking she would just get in his and James' way. But her flying that night had impressed him. The three of them proved to be quite a team against Thackeray, Lestrange, Jugson and Avery, and they most certainly would have won if Snape hadn't tipped off Filch, whose arrival had forced them to cut the match short in order to hurry back to their common room before he could catch them. Sirius had no doubt that it was due to that night the three of them were able to work together so seamlessly the following year when they tried out for the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

Then of course there was the first time they'd won the Quidditch House Cup, another memorable occasion. It was against Slytherin, and probably one of the ugliest, most brutal matches Hogwarts had ever seen, with the Slytherins committing just about every foul in the rule book and even some that weren't. Five hours in the pouring rain they'd played – nobody could see what was going on in the torrent, especially not the usually hapless Madam McKinch as referee, and so there was all manner of illegal maneuvering, ramming, colliding, even punching and kicking, and the occasional thrown hex. Obviously, Kylie was a part of the story too as she had played Seeker – she had been so riled up by the Slytherins that even she resorted to dirty tactics, careening into one of the Slytherin Beaters and nearly knocking him off his broom because he had been swinging his bat at Gryffindor players rather than Bludgers.

And then there was the Great Prank War of '75, the unofficial title given to the three chaotic months back in fifth year when a relatively small prank conflict between some Ravenclaw and Slytherin seventh years served as the powder keg to set off a full-fledged war that eventually drew in all four houses with students of every year involved. That was the year the Levicorpus hex was discovered by the student body, which certainly made some of the prank battles interesting. People were getting hexed left and right – one couldn't walk two steps without bumping into someone with an inflated head, donkey ears, whiskers, antlers, or an extraordinarily severe acne breakout. It had been a glorious affair, sneaking around to plot various ambushes or having secret meetings to forge temporary alliances with other houses. Sirius and James had been two of the most active 'warriors' for Gryffindor, becoming de facto Captains rallying their fellow housemates to victory in many battles (victory was decreed to be whoever had the most people left conscious or moderately unscathed after a fight). Throughout the war the Prefects had stayed out of the conflict (they mostly gave up trying to discipline anybody because of the sheer number of students breaking the rules every day). But by the last two weeks or so most of them had given in and joined the fray, and amongst them was Kylie. He remembered she had shot off a well-aimed Shield Charm that had protected him and James from what would have been a rather painful Searing Hex when a couple of the Fanatics ambushed them in the courtyard. Then she had helped them force the Slytherins to retreat.

It was at this point in their reminiscing that Sirius had caught on to the inordinate number of times Kylie's name had been mentioned. Having realized what his friends were trying to do, he abruptly took his leave of the Great Hall to get some peace and quiet for a moment before classes started the day.

How many times did he have to tell them to just let it go? All week they had been pestering him about Kylie, James especially. And now they apparently thought he needed reminding of the 'good old days', back when things were simpler with her, as if that was supposed to cool his ire or something. Just because they'd had a lot of fun over the years didn't change what she'd said and done now. What were they playing at? Why couldn't they understand that he didn't want to hear about her anymore? He was sick of her mistrust, insecurities and general lack of faith in him and didn't want to deal with it – end of story. James, Remus and Peter didn't need to know the finer details about their fight.

But why are you so determined not to tell them? asked the nagging voice of his conscious (which sounded suspiciously like Remus at times). Is it because you're afraid they'll persuade you to forgive her if they understood what happened? Convince you that you're not as angry as you think you are?

Shut up, Remus-voice.

What would be so wrong with giving her another chance, anyway? After all you're just trying to punish her, hurt her as badly as she hurt you…

I said shut the hell up!

So it was in a most dour mood that Sirius showed up in the Potions dungeon, a mood which only grew worse the second he realized what the subject matter of today's lesson was going to be. Of all things it had to be love potions.

He tried to steel himself when his turn by the Amortentia came, unsure of what to expect, really. He reluctantly breathed in the fumes, and for just one brief moment everything that had been on his mind that week simply washed away. He was reminded of motorcycle tires, and the crisp, clean smell of a moonlit night after a rainfall – the smell of freedom. And then came another fragrance, the most enticing – a fresh, flowery scent with hints of vanilla and sun-kissed apples. It was an intoxicating invasion of his senses, and it took some willpower to draw himself out of his haze.

Well of course you were going to smell her, mate. Don't act so surprised. This time the voice sounded like James. He sighed and tried to push that thought away, but his glance strayed across the table regardless.

She was watching him tentatively but quickly turned away when their eyes met. It was a sad, dejected motion, so unlike what he was used to from her. Kylie had always been a little awkward and self-conscious, but she was also a spitfire. Stubborn and passionate, a Gryffindor at heart, who would never back down from anything or anyone even if deep down she was terrified.

He didn't want to feel guilty. Not at all. But it couldn't be anything other than guilt clenching tightly at his stomach now. She should have been glaring at him like she usually was, full of pride and wrath at his latest misdeed or teasing comment. He knew how to handle that, at least. But he couldn't take seeing her looking like a crestfallen little lamb, or a kicked puppy… especially when it was because of him.

Damn it, he wasn't supposed to be the guilty one! He was supposed to be angry at her, not himself!

Hooke was now going on about the ingredients in Libertentia, a potion that supposedly compelled the drinker to act on any attractions they might have. Sirius tried to listen but his efforts were in vain. He kept glimpsing Kylie out of the corner of his eye, unbearably sad and beautiful, and he could think of little else.

"I basically told him that I didn't believe in him – that I never did," Kylie said quietly as she stared into the depths of her untouched butterbeer bottle. It was the weekend of their last Hogsmeade trip of the year, so Lily, Taren and Kimmie had determined to drag Kylie down to the Three Broomsticks later that Friday evening. The always jovial mood at the pub had not exactly cheered her up, but she had finally been coaxed into recounting the details of her fight with Sirius. "That's why he hates me now."

"He doesn't hate you," Lily said gently.

"Doesn't he?"

"No, because if he did he wouldn't have to try so hard to hate you."

"And he wouldn't be sneaking glances at you every time he thinks you're not looking," added Kimmie.

"…He is?" Kylie looked tentatively across the breadth of the crowded Three Broomsticks where Sirius was seated at a booth with James, Remus and Peter. He was frowning, looking to be in as a bad a mood as ever as he leaned back in his seat and stared at the table, ignoring the others' conversation. He was also, as far as Kylie could tell, not trying to sneak looks in her direction.

"He was looking at you, Kylie," Kimmie insisted. "He did it at least twice in the last ten minutes."

Kylie sighed gloomily. "You guys don't have to try and put a positive spin on this. I… I deserve it. He has every right to despise me." All three of them tried to argue at once but she spoke up again, "He does. I made him believe that I was just stringing him along for months, that the deal we made was a lie from the start. And… it wasn't even about the deal, really. It was the way I reacted to Circe's stupid rumors… God, he must think I was just waiting for any excuse to get rid of him. Like I thought he was worthless to me."

"But that's not true, right?" Lily said after a moment's pause.

"What?"

"He wasn't worthless to you?"

"No! Of course not," Kylie said emphatically with a shake of her head.

"And did you really expect him to break his promise?"

"…At first I did… But it was different three months ago! Guys, I didn't understand why he was interested in me. I thought the bet was just about his ego, not me - I agreed to it expecting him to get bored and move on before the After-Newts Ball. Frankly I still don't know why he made such an effort over me when he could have anyone else he wanted. What made me any different from other girls he's gone through?"

Lily exchanged pointed, slightly exasperated looks with Taren and Kimmie. "All the same, Kylie, was there even just a small part of you that hoped he would win the bet?"

Kylie managed a brief, weak smile. "Yes. But I didn't think it was… realistic to get my hopes up."

"You need to let yourself trust him, Kylie," stated Taren as she straitened in her seat. "It sounds like your own lack of confidence is the root of the problem."

Lily nodded encouragingly. "I agree. If you made Sirius feel worthless, Kylie, it's probably because you keep putting yourself down."

"And you need to stop," Kimmie said, slapping the table for emphasis and causing the rest of them to jump. "As I told you this morning, he likes you, okay? Sirius likes you a lot. And you wanna know why? It's because you're brilliant, dammit. We think so, and Sirius especially thinks so. He made such an effort over you because he knows you're ten times the girl any of those 'other' girls are. You know what makes you different from them? You challenge him, you don't fawn over him like a sycophant. You can hold a decent conversation because you have a brain and you're interested in things besides just your hair or make up or clothes. You share passions and hobbies and a sense of humor. I could go on but I think I've made my point. The important thing is that unless you stop wallowing in self-doubt and start believing in yourself, he's going to forget how brilliant you are." She let out a deep breath. "And that's… what I have to say about that."

Taren and Lily stared at her in surprise, but Kylie's mouth turned up in what was her first real smile in days.

"I… think I needed to hear that… Thanks, Kim."

"You're welcome," Kimmie replied as she took a dignified sip of butterbeer. "Furthermore, I strongly suggest that you approach Sirius outright to apologize. Show some initiative and make him listen to you. And for Merlin's sake have a little more confidence in yourself and don't be so terrified of rejection or being disappointed in him. Life is about taking risks! Leaps of faith!"

"So says Kimmie, the all-knowing guru of life experiences," said Taren with a grin.

"Damn straight."

"And I'll add that you should try to sort this out with Sirius before your Quidditch match tomorrow," said Lily with a laugh. "Potter's having palpitations over the thought that you guys might lose to Hufflepuff."

"Is that concern for James' I hear coming from you, Lily?" teased Taren.

Lily smiled and waved that suggestion off. "Don't get too excited. I am merely being a concerned fellow Gryffindor."

They stayed at the Three Broomsticks for a little while longer until Kimmie suddenly remembered that a brand new fashion boutique had opened in Hogsmeade, and they would be open late for student visiting weekends. She promptly hauled the rest of them to the store and squealed like a ten-year-old over ice-cream over the handful of dress robes in the window display. Apparently they were by some new young hotshot designer who was rocking the witch fashion world – of course only Kimmie had ever heard of her so Lily, Taren and Kylie couldn't really see what all the fuss was about.

Once inside the store Kimmie's excitement was infectious, and soon enough even Kylie was managing to enjoy herself as they helped Kimmie pick out dresses to try on. She had to admit some of them were quite nice. She might have even been tempted to buy one for herself… assuming a certain someone would ever stop ignoring her existence and want to look at her again.

"What d'you think of this one?" Kimmie asked as she twirled around in a floaty periwinkle blue gown that set off her fair skin and dark hair prettily.

"It's gorgeous, Kim," said Taren. "Blue has always been your color."

"Are you sure it's not too pricey?" Lily asked tentatively as she examined a rack of gowns. "Some of these things cost a small fortune."

Kimmie waved a dismissive hand. "It's my seventeenth birthday coming up and my parents promised to get me something amazing for my coming of age…." She peaked at the price tag and winced. "…Of course if it's too much I could always just rent it only for the After-Newts ball."

Kimmie glanced up at that moment and something outside the store window captured her attention. They all followed her gaze to see that the Marauders were passing by the store. James spotted them through the window and nudged Sirius. Judging by their gestures, he and Remus were trying to persuade him to go into the store.

Sirius met her eyes through the window and for a few hopeful seconds Kylie believed he might actually do it. There was indecision in his face, confliction.

His anger won out in the end, because he brushed past his friends a moment later and strode off down the street, back towards Hogwarts. Remus gave Kylie a sympathetic glance through the window before they went after him.

There was a beat of tense silence in their corner of the store.

"Nothing like the arrival of a dark and broody Sirius to kill the mood," noted Taren.

Kimmie smirked. "It's like a stormy cloud swirls above his head everywhere he goes, zapping passersby with little lightning bolts."

Kylie didn't have the heart to laugh with the rest of them. Having lost her appetite for gown shopping, she quietly took her leave and found an empty bench outside to wait for her friends. It was a balmy warm night and this particular stretch of Hogsmeade street was devoid of people. Kylie was glad for the solitude, needing a few minutes to herself.

They all made it sound so easy, her friends. It didn't seem to her that getting Sirius' forgiveness was as simple as having self-confidence and apologizing for her shoddy treatment of him. What could she say to him that wouldn't come across as laughable at best and pathetic at worst?

Somehow she doubted Sirius would be swayed if she told him that she had treated him like crap because… she had a tendency to treat herself like crap. He might laugh in her face at such an excuse. Or more likely, Kylie thought as she watched the figures of Sirius, James, Remus and Peter fading into the distance, he wouldn't sit still long enough for her to even finish explaining herself.

Until that moment Kylie hadn't realized she'd been idly stroking her smoky quartz pendant. Ever since Sirius had given it to her she'd been in the habit of wearing it almost every day, and not just because the pendant stored memories better the more she wore it. It matched just about anything and seemed to set off any outfit. She also had to admit that it had felt good displaying something Sirius had given in public for the world to see. Even after their fight she'd continued to wear it, usually keeping it hidden under her clothes.

The quartz felt cool against her skin. It had been a while since she had opened it up and perused her memories for the fun of it. Since now was as good a time as any, she unclasped and opened the stone halves, silently willing the magic of the pendant to activate.

It helped to be focused when using the pendant, but her mind was a jumble of thoughts and emotions, and she wasn't entirely sure what memory she wanted to explore anyway. Tiny images flickered in and out within the pendant, flashes of her face, her friends, but mostly of Sirius. It was Sirius smiling and laughing with her – memories of him before she had screwed up everything.

The pendant was narrowing down to select memories now, trying to find exactly what she was looking for. Its magic had a knack for that: figuring out what she wanted to see before she knew herself by reading her subconscious. She recognized last New Year's Eve clearly, when Sirius had flown her to London on his motorcycle and given her the pendant. She had stubbornly refused to admit to herself for so long that that night had been one of the best of her life.

The pendant's images circulated further back, much further into her past. She glimpsed various scenes of life before her sixth year at Hogwarts, before she and Sirius had really gotten to know each other. They'd had such a tenuously balanced relationship back then. She had wanted to feel nothing but disdain for him and his conceited, bullying ways, but she'd been forced to tolerate him when they both made the Quidditch team. And of course, sometimes his charm and wit made it very hard to dislike him.

She wondered if things might have turned out very differently for them both if there had been a slight change in circumstances. What if, for whatever reason, both of them never ended up making the Gryffindor Quidditch team? Better yet, what if they'd ended up in different houses? Would she have turned up her nose at Sirius' wild antics from the lofty Ravenclaw tower or the Hufflepuff tunnels, never getting to know the other side of him? If they had not been placed into each other's company by circumstance as they were in Gryffindor, would Sirius have ever known she existed?

The pendant was swirling in memories again, and she knew it had suddenly decided which one to fixate on when it expanded outwards to form a three dimensional image in her open palms. It was like looking into a snow globe with no glass, with a very lifelike scene playing out inside. By relaxing her mind and just focusing on the pendant, Kylie could hear everything going on in the memory playing out before her. If she so chose, she could also concentrate just right and let her mind dive directly into the memory as with a Pensieve, re-experiencing the scene as if she'd travelled back in time.

This time she contented herself with just looking on from afar. The familiar setting of Platform 9¾ had materialized in her hands, and Kylie spotted herself struggling to load her heavy trunk onto the Hogwarts Express. She realized with surprise that this was from all the way back to the first day of Hogwarts. She couldn't believe how small she looked – how small everyone had looked. She could pick out the eleven year old faces of her classmates in the crowd of students milling about the platform.

Kylie's eleven year old self looked like she'd been crying earlier. She remembered she'd been upset that day because her parents had broken their promise to be there when she boarded the train for her first year at school. They had instead flown off to South America the day before because a groundbreaking magical archaeological site had just been uncovered in Peru. Mrs. Eliot had taken her to King's Cross, but Kylie had been too embarrassed to be accompanied by her housekeeper instead of her parents so she had insisted on going through the magical barrier on her own. Thus she had ended up having to try and load her trunk by herself without much luck.

Just as she was now remembering, a boy appeared next to her eleven year old self and helped her lift her trunk all the way up the steps. Even back then Sirius had been taller than her. Her younger self thanked him without directly looking at him – she hadn't wanted him to see traces of her tears.

"No problem," Sirius said, brushing his hair out of his eyes and giving her a friendly smile – that was the first time she saw the trademark smile, except at that point it wasn't quite so devastating as it would become in just a few years. It was the smile that drew her eye and caused little Kylie to finally look at him properly. His attention moved to loading his own trunk up the steps, and little Kylie was debating in her head whether or not to ask if they ought to find a compartment together – it was plain as day in her face.

Am I always that transparent? Or was it just when I was eleven? Kylie wondered.

Sirius strode off on his own down the train corridor before little Kylie could work up the nerve to say anything. She let a resigned sigh and went off on her own to find a compartment – it was where she was going to meet Kimmie for the first time. Lily and Taren she would not meet until they reached Hogwarts.

As if spurred on by her thought process, the memory before her dissolved and reformed into the small chamber off to the side of the Great Hall where the first years were brought to await the Sorting Ceremony. Three students were standing imposingly against one lone student, and the rest of the first years had backed up against the walls of the room, not wanting to get involved in a fight on their very first day. Kylie recognized the lone student to be James, and the three facing him were Rodolphus Lestrange, Grigori Jugson and Cyril Avery, each soon-to-be Slytherins and future Fanatics.

The memory came flooding back to her as she watched. A moment earlier she remembered that Lestrange had been loudly mocking another boy, Devon Hendricks. Devon, a Muggleborn, had been voicing his thoughts out loud about the benefits of each House and which one he thought he might get in to. Lestrange had overheard him mentioning Slytherin and laughed obnoxiously about a 'Mudblood thinking he could be a Slytherin.' Devon was a proud kid, and he had recently learned about the insult of being called a Mudblood, so his first and reckless instinct was to shove the much larger Lestrange and demand an apology. Lestrange, egged on by Jugson and Avery, shoved him back and knocked the kid roughly into the wall. James stepped in, calling Lestrange out to pick on someone his own size.

"Back down, Potter, or I'll make you regret it," Lestrange said threateningly. It was clear they were already acquainted. Kylie had wondered if this was a continuation of an earlier confrontation on the Hogwarts Express.

"You're welcome to try, you inbred ape," James retorted fearlessly. A few people gasped. Some laughed. It was well known how sensitive some purebloods were about the 'inbred' accusation, and it certainly was an apt description for Lestrange in particular.

Lestrange scowled but seemed hesitant to make a move. He knew had a formidable opponent in James. That's when Jugson and Avery moved to stand beside him.

Kylie had to smile to herself, watching this scene six years later. A confrontation between eleven year olds thinking they were tough stuff was a little ridiculous looking, but at the time she had been quite scared, wondering if someone was going to get hurt and constantly checking the door hoping Professor McGonagall would return to stop it.

Lestrange smirked, emboldened. "Now what, Potter?"

A low chuckle drifted through the room, and Sirius leisurely stepped forward to stand next to James. "He's waiting for a couple more of your mates to come back you up so we can have a fair fight."

Several people laughed and Lestrange flushed. He always was a thin-skinned punk.

"Go on, we'll wait," Sirius added. "I think four or five more guys on your side should just about it even it up. Wouldn't you say, James?"

"That sounds about right," James replied, grinning. "As long as you and I had our hands tied behind our backs."

More laughter ensued. Thankfully McGonagall returned a second later, so Lestrange could only slink glumly back into the crowd as she began directing them into the Great Hall.

Kylie noticed that her eleven year old self was smiling and kept darting looks at Sirius like she couldn't help herself. She could remember all the admiring thoughts she'd had in that moment: 'He's so cool and brave and funny… He even helped me with my trunk before!' And so on. Above all she had been thinking about how much she wished she could be as bold and confident as him.

Of course, over the next few weeks her younger self was going to discover that James and Sirius loved bullying almost as much as the Slytherin Fanatics.

So it's not like I was absolutely captivated with him from the moment I met him, Kylie thought to herself, as if she was trying to argue with the pendant. It wasn't long before I could barely stand him! Just because I might have been a little taken with him on that first day doesn't mean anything-

The pendant was responding to her thought process again, because the scene dissolved and reformed into the Sorting Ceremony. Sirius was one of the first kids to be sorted, and he also became the first new Gryffindor of the year.

Something clicked in her memory as she watched her younger self watching Sirius take his seat amongst the applauding Gryffindors. She understood, now, why the pendant's subconscious-interpreting magic was showing her this day of all days.

Several more kids got sorted after Sirius, including Taren, Kimmie and Lily. Soon enough Professor McGonagall called out "Hart, Kyleen!"

Before coming to Hogwarts, Kylie had not been sure what House she would be in. Her family history included mostly Ravenclaws and a handful of Slytherins. There had been the rare Gryffindor over the decades and never any Hufflepuffs as far she knew. The only thing Kylie was certain of before that day was that she didn't want to be a Slytherin, since it was the House of so many of her least favorite relatives.

That had all changed within the span of a few minutes during the ceremony. As the Sorting Hat was placed on Kylie's head, she cherished a secret hope that it would place her in Gryffindor.

Much to her surprise, the hat, which was debating between Ravenclaw and Gryffindor, heard her wish and granted it.

She watched her younger self walk shakily over to the Gryffindor table and sit by her future best friends, Lily, Taren and Kimmie. She glanced at Sirius again but quickly looked away when their eyes met, her cheeks slightly pink - the first time she ever blushed because of him.

Kylie sighed softly, shaking her head. The scene in her hands blinked out of sight as she closed the pendant, and she leaned back against the Hogsmeade bench.

Lily's words to her that morning suddenly seemed especially poignant. Not only had Kylie been the one to initiate a closer relationship with Sirius, but a secret, spontaneous little wish had also gotten herself into the same House as him six years earlier. She'd managed to forget that little detail over the years – she may have forced it from her memory within just a few weeks of seeing the egotistical, less noble side of Sirius.

And it just became too painful to keep on carrying a torch for him after I realized how out of my league he was, she thought with a pang.

But he wasn't out of her league anymore. Maybe he never was. And all she had to do to figure that out was to stop getting in her own way…

A prickling sensation on the back of her neck drew Kylie out of her reverie. She felt like she was being watched. Straitening, her eyes scanned the fairly well lit street, noticing it was deserted and wondering if she was imagining things.

She turned to her right suddenly, her eyes snapping onto an alleyway between two Hogsmeade shops just a few feet away. The street lamps' light didn't reach it, and it seemed to be full of ominous shadows. Was there somebody standing there, watching her?

She grew tense, and her fingers closed instinctively around her wand in her pocket. Before she could pull it out and cast Lumos to check it out, though, the doors to the boutique burst open and her friends poured out, laughing as they struggled to squeeze Kimmie's bursting shopping bags through the thin doorway.

"Hey Kylie!" laughed Lily. "Believe it or not this is only half of what she wanted to buy."

"Yeah, we had to drag her out of there before she bought up the whole store," added Taren.

Kimmie gasped. "Oh but I forgot to get those cute dancing slippers! I'll just be a minu-"

Taren quickly hooked her arm through Kimmie's and began leading her away from the store. "Oh no you don't – that's enough shopping for one evening."

"Come on – let's call it a night," Lily called, grinning. She looked around for Kylie. "You alright?"

Kylie was eyeing the alleyway apprehensively. The arrival of her friends had distracted her, and in those few seconds the feeling of being watched had faded. She wondered if there really had been someone standing there at all.

Chalking it up to too much butterbeer earlier, Kylie turned and shook her head at Lily. "It's nothing. Let's go."

Saturday afternoon came in no time at all. Twenty minutes before she was due on the Quidditch pitch for Gryffindor's match against Hufflepuff, Kylie found herself pacing around the corridor outside the boys' locker room. She was already dressed in her gear and fidgeting restlessly with the buckles on her arm bracers, futilely attempting to calm her frenzied nerves. It wasn't the match she was worried about, but the prospect of being alone and face to face with Sirius for the first time since their blazing row two weeks earlier.

James had agreed to help arrange the meeting by delaying Sirius in the locker room long enough for the rest of the team to change and leave, giving Kylie the chance to see him at least for short while before the match. She only needed a few minutes, she had told him.

Unfortunately, Kylie was starting to believe she would need longer than that to say what she needed to say. Her heart felt like it was in her throat, and her head whirred with all the things she needed to tell him. Everything that could possibly go wrong kept playing out in her mind's eye. She didn't know if she could bear it if his opinion of her got any worse.

Honestly, it was ridiculous the effect he had on her.

Pull yourself together, Kylie, she commanded herself sternly. She had been putting off this confrontation all day and she owed it to Sirius and herself to make this right.

After a brief commotion, Miguel, Ricky and Toby emerged from the locker room, chatting and jostling with typical pre-match swagger. She was glad that they, at least, were in better spirits compared to their most recent practice.

James' voice drifted out from inside, telling Sirius he would meet him on the pitch. He appeared in the corridor a second later and nodded at Kylie.

"He's all yours," he said, giving her an exaggerated wink as if she was going in there to ravish Sirius or something. His humor coaxed a brief little smile from her and eased her anxiety considerably.

Sirius was strapping on his boots when she walked in. His back was turned to her, but he heard the rustle of her Quidditch robes and looked around. Their eyes met, and he abruptly stilled. For a heartbeat they just stared at each other.

He looked away, his face a mask.

"I know you don't want to talk me," she began cautiously. She waited but he said nothing, merely returning to strapping on his leg gear. "But that's okay, because right now I just need you to listen."

"Talk fast," he replied curtly. "You have until I'm done suiting up. Then I'm leaving."

"Fair enough." She swallowed and took a step closer, scavenging vainly for the right words. "The last time we spoke… I said some things that I… that I didn't mean. I let my emotions get the better of me and… that's why I reacted so rashly – stupidly - to Circe's rumors. I…" Merlin, her tongue was tied in knots. She was sounding more pathetic by the second. This wasn't how she wanted to explain herself to him, like a stammering fool making excuses. But something was holding her back from saying what she really felt.

Either way she was effectively pushing Sirius further away, if the impatient scowl on his face was any indication.

"You have to understand that I – I would take it all back if I could-"

"I've heard enough," Sirius cut in sharply. He stood and began walking out of the room, buckling his bracers as his went.

Kylie's chest clenched. There was something so final about the way he was walking away from her. Would she lose him forever if he walked out that door before she told him the truth? It was now or never.

"It's not like I never cared about you, Sirius!" Her voice brimmed with emotion and determination.

He halted in his steps, but he didn't turn around.

"I know you think I didn't – that you never meant anything to me from the start. And what I regret the most is that I made you believe that. It was my own fault."

She swallowed. It felt like a hippogriff was sitting on her chest, but if she stopped now who knew when she would have the courage to open herself up again?

"I let myself believe those lies because of how I felt about you - the closer we got, the more afraid I was that you would let me down. There was a part of me that always wanted to run away, because I was scared of getting in too deep… Pushing you away felt like the safer choice. So in my rush to avoid getting hurt… I ended up hurting you instead."

It was getting harder to keep the tremor out of her voice. Merlin knew what Sirius was thinking. He hadn't moved an inch.

Look at me, she silently pleaded.

"I wish I'd told you this before," she said. Tears pricked at her eyes and she fiercely struggled to keep them at bay, "instead of being such a stubborn coward. You weren't wasting your time with me Sirius. And you could never mean nothing to me. If you did… I wouldn't feel this way right now. Devastated. H-heartbroken." Her voice finally broke on the last word. She hadn't planned on saying it – it just slipped out - and now everything was out there. She'd poured out her heart to him.

"Sirius, I'm so sorry." It was the only thing left to say. She dashed away the tears that threatened to fall, and out of the corner of her eye she saw him slowly turn on his heel.

Briefly, his eyes lingered on the ground, but then they flickered up to her face. He was still tight jawed, but the intensity in his gaze had her gripped. She'd have given anything to know what was going on behind that gray stare boring right through her.

What was only a moment felt like hours passing them by… and then finally there was a subtle shift in his demeanor. The hard edge around him faded.

"You're not a coward," he said quietly. Then, with a trace of a smile, he added, "But you are stubborn."

When he looked at her there was warmth in his eyes. Her heart did a little leap.

As they gazed at each other, a faint cheering coming from outside reminded them that the match was minutes from starting.

"Good luck, Kylie," he said, picking up his broom that was leaning by the door. "After the match, we can talk more."

A bright, hopeful smile graced her lips and she nodded. Somehow she had a feeling everything would be alright.

Nearly two hours later, the Gryffindor Quidditch team poured in to their common room surrounded by the rest of their cheering and hollering house. Their teamwork was back on top form so Hufflepuff never stood a chance. Sirius and Toby were more than ready to redeem themselves after their last performance against Ravenclaw, and they helped to score so many points that it firmly propelled Gryffindor to the lead for the inter-house Quidditch tournament. The Snitch took an age to make its appearance, but when it finally did Kylie was instantly on top of it. She caught it before Hufflepuff's Seeker even realized what had happened.

Every Gryffindor was in the mood to celebrate as if they'd already won the House Cup. Somebody dug up a couple of wireless boxes to blast the latest hits from wizarding radio and others threw up last minute decorations including balloons that bounced haphazardly around the room and miniature fireworks that sparkled festively over their heads.

Sirius and James disappeared for a while and returned just as evening fell, bearing with them a feast's worth of butterbeers, pumpkin fizz and Honeydukes sweets, much to the delight of the crowd. For hours everybody ate, drank, laughed, sang and generally celebrated as exuberantly as possible, more than making up for Gryffindor's last dismal match.

Kylie spent most of the party in one corner with her friends, laughing and joking and feeling like herself again. She remembered she meant to talk to Sirius, but neither of them had had a chance. The party had been so lively that there simply hadn't been a good time for it yet.

She and Sirius had been meeting each other's eyes across the room several times, moments that felt surprisingly intimate despite all the people surrounding them. Every time Kylie noticed him looking her away, each of them smiled as if they were sharing a private joke. And each time it never failed to light a spark that warmed her to her very core.

Shortly after ten o'clock, the two seventh year prefects sent most of the first and second years to bed since it was after curfew. But even with fewer people, the party became no less raucous.

Around then Lily announced that she was going to get a pumpkin fizz refill, and at the refreshments table she was quickly engaged in conversation by James. Seeing that, Kylie scanned the room and noticed that Sirius was with Remus and a few seventh years, but not really taking part in the conversation. Their eyes met again, and Kylie knew it was the right time to approach.

"…Hey," she greeted with a tentative smile. After her locker room apology and the excitement of the match, everything seemed right between them again, but Kylie couldn't help but wonder if Sirius might need more time before they were back on comfortable terms once more. After all, there hadn't been time for him to say much before the match…

"Hey," he replied. His manner was casual but comfortable, no sign of anger or indifference.

A beat of silence followed as they assessed each other, before Kylie began, "Sirius, I…"

"It's okay, Kylie," he said, setting his empty butterbeer bottle onto a nearby table. "I forgive you. In fact, I realized I need to apologize as well."

"For what?"

"…For overreacting." He smiled self-deprecatingly. "I think… I let my pride get the better of me. …I was angry but I didn't have to be such a prat about it."

Folding her arms, she leaned slightly against the wall they were standing beside. "To be honest, I wasn't sure you would ever forgive me. I didn't think I deserved it."

"Well," he said, leaning against the wall and tilting his head personally towards her – ever a favorite move of his. "If forgiveness was always deserved, there wouldn't be a need for it."

"True." She smiled up at him. Her stomach did a little somersault when his hand reached out to brush back a strand of her hair that had fallen across her face. A reflexive gesture – she wondered if he even realized what he was doing when it happened.

Something had changed between them, there was no mistaking it. They had made up, but they were more than just 'back to normal'. It was like they'd passed a test of sorts and were now confronted with a different kind of tension. Except this tension wasn't based on hurt feelings or bruised pride – this tension was electrifying. The air around them fairly crackled.

A handful of unopened icy cold butterbeer bottles were on a nearby table, for which Kylie was supremely grateful. The common room was starting to feel rather hot.

"Shall we toast to Gryffindor's win?" she asked, eager to change the subject. Sirius had seemed quite content just to stand there gazing at her, sending her pulse racing and probably knowing full well the effect he was having.

He picked up his drink and lifted it to her glass, never once taking his eyes off of her.

"Here's to Gryffindor," she said, feeling a bit weak in the knees. "May we secure the House Cup for a third year in a row."

"To Gryffindor," he replied, barely above a murmur. She nearly dropped her bottle, distracted as she was by his smoldering nearness.

"Kylie, Sirius, wait!" called out a voice suddenly, jarring them both out of their staring. Taren was hurrying up to them through the crowd. "Don't drink those!"

"Why, what's wrong?" Kylie asked curiously.

"There's been a little mishap, I'm afraid," Taren explained, chuckling slightly. "I just found out that a fourth year, Rebecca Plover, may have accidentally spiked some of the drinks in here with Libertentia."

"The love potion?" Kylie remembered the name from Potions class yesterday – Libertentia was the one that stripped away inhibitions and compelled people to act on their romantic attractions. She gulped, realizing the implications.

"Yes – she's a bit distraught about it, actually. I overheard her telling her friend. They're over there in the corner, by the bookshelf," she said, gesturing. "It sounds like she found out about the cauldron of Libertentia Professor Hooke has set up in his dungeon, and she managed to sneak some out of there, Merlin knows how. She was trying to trick a fourth year boy into drinking some so she could prove that he fancies her, but she told me she thinks she bungled up the Decanting Spell and spiked a lot more than just one bottle of butterbeer."

"So there could be Libertentia in some of these?" Kylie asked, glancing at the bottle in her hand.

"Possibly, but don't worry you two," Taren said reassuringly, seeing their faces. "If you'd drunk Libertentia you would know immediately. Especially since its effects tend to be magnified by alcohol – even just a little like in butterbeer. Rebecca has already seen the effects firsthand – her crush planted a big sloppy kiss on her after just one sip."

Relief swept through Kylie, and she glanced at Sirius. At least she knew the vibes between them tonight were natural and not due to being literally love drunk.

Sirius appeared to be distracted. He grinned suddenly, his attention fixed on the middle of the common room. "You don't think Lily's had some of it, do you Taren?"

They looked around, noticing that Lily was in front of James, looking unsteady on her feet and staring rather dazedly at him. He appeared to be asking her what was wrong.

A second later she threw herself upon him, grasping his shirt and kissing him full on the mouth. The students closest to them broke off their conversations to gawk in general shock and astonishment, prompting the rest of the room to swivel their heads around to see why it had gotten so quiet. No one looked nearly as stunned as James himself.

Giggles and snorts broke out here and there. A few guys whistled. Lily didn't seem to have noticed. She was far too intent on snogging James and probably wouldn't have stopped if the very ground gave way beneath her feet.

"Ah… we should…" Kylie managed to say, recovering from her own surprise.

"Yeah," Taren agreed, muffling her giggles.

Barely fifteen minutes later, Kylie and Kimmie were situated in their dormitory, watching with bemused fascination as Lily tore around the room like a fiery whirlwind. One minute she had been obsessively rearranging a shelf of books to be alphabetized and then reverse alphabetized, and the next she had made and remade her bed. Now she was in the middle of organizing her sock drawer.

Doing anything, it seemed, to keep herself distracted from unwanted thoughts.

"It's maddening!" she kept declaring. "I can't stop thinking about him! And snogging him! Arrgghh!" With her last outburst she jammed her sock drawer close and breathed like she'd just run a marathon.

Moments ago Kylie and Taren had pried her off of James. She had still been under the potion's effects, and it had taken a jet of cold water to the face – courtesy of a quick-thinking but perhaps overzealous Kimmie – to snap her out of it.

Unfortunately for her, the effects of Libertentia did not include memory loss. No more than a few mortified seconds had passed, during which Lily had turned a most remarkable shade of fire engine red, gasped and spluttered, and made a series of other incomprehensible noises, before she'd dashed up to the dormitory faster than they'd ever seen her move.

All the while James had stood there blinking at her, haired messed up from where Lily had run her hands ardently through it and looking like he'd been hit over the head by a Bludger. Or two. Sirius had come by then, clapping him on the back and clearly trying very hard not to be very amused by the whole thing as he went about explaining it.

Kylie knew there was bound to be quite a few more Gryffindors who needed explanations, as well. Before she had gone upstairs after Lily, a dozen other couples had engaged in similarly spontaneous and unexpected embraces around the common room. Bystanders who hadn't imbibed any Libertentia were either baffled into silent shock by their friends' behavior, while others had dissolved into laughter after they'd understood what was going on.

Taren had stayed a few minutes more to try and clear up the situation while Kylie had gone upstairs with Kimmie to make sure Lily didn't tear the dormitory apart or do anything else drastic. Of course they'd merely discovered her cleaning and organizing the already perfectly tidy room like her life depended on it.

"I need something to do with my bloody hands!" she exclaimed, frustrated that she couldn't find anything else to fuss with now that her sock drawer was immaculately arranged.

"Lily," Kylie said as soothingly as possible. "You'll probably feel better if you just sit and relax, cool yourself down…"

"I can't!" she replied, wringing her hands. "You have no idea what this damn potion is doing to me. I keep feeling the urge to just run back down there to find Potter and jump him!"

"Whoa," uttered Kimmie, eyes wide. "That's hardcore, Lily."

Kylie could guess the mischievous thoughts running through Kimmie's mind at the moment. They probably revolved around plans to spike her Hufflepuff boyfriend, Casey Shipley's, coffee with Libertentia in the morning, just to see what would happen.

Taren arrived at the doorway, followed by Opal, Ocean and Mallory. The latter two were semi-supporting a dreamy and giggly Opal. Kylie briefly thought that Opal must have been another Libertentia victim, but then remembered that this was actually normal behavior for her.

"Toby kissed me! Can you believe it?" she exclaimed happily. "I knew he still had feelings for me! I knew it!"

Toby Randall and Opal had dated last month. Toby, typically, had unceremoniously ended the relationship not long after it started, and a distraught Opal had been telling the rest of them all about it for several nights afterwards. Now she seemed to be under the impression that a little accidental Libertentia had revealed Toby's true, loving feelings for her.

Kylie sighed helplessly, wondering if Opal was getting her hopes up over nothing. When it came to a changeable guy like Toby, a potion like Libertentia would probably just make him latch on to the nearest pretty girl regardless of who it was.

"Everything's calmed down back there," Taren noted with a humorous sparkle in her eye. "Remus and I had to help pull apart a pair who had both been drugged and were about to get very carried away. Right in the middle of the common room."

Kimmie grinned. "I bet it was those two seventh year lovebirds, Helena Finch and Thatcher Flynn. Was it them?"

Taren shook her head. "Half right. It was Helena and Thatcher's twin brother, Terrence."

"Ha, you're joking!" Kimmie gasped with surprise. "Well, it's got to be awkward in the seventh year boys' dorm right now."

Lily, who had been pacing about the room and rubbing her forehead as if to rub away the effects of the potion through sheer force of will, let out a frustrated groan, "Merlin's wrinkly backside, this is ridiculous!"

Kylie smiled with suppressed mirth. She looked at Kimmie and mouthed, "Merlin's what?"

"Just how strong of a dose did I get?" Lily continued. "I feel like I'm going to jump out of my skin if I don't… if I don't… Damn it! What kind of a nitwit screws up a Decanting Spell anyway? That's third year standard spellwork! I ought to throw Plover into detention for the embarrassment of that alone!"

Steam might as well been shooting out of her ears as she fumed and paced some more. Kylie shared a look with Taren, and she knew they were both wondering if they should remind Lily that it really wasn't the strength of the dose that mattered. After all, Libertentia couldn't have compelled Lily to act on an attraction that didn't already exist in the first place.

But then again, Lily probably hadn't forgotten that little detail at all. It was no wonder she was so discombobulated.

"Taren, please tell me that Plover thought to steal some antidotes while she was at it," Lily said suddenly.

"I'm sorry, Lily," Taren said, shaking her head. "I already asked her. She didn't foresee a need for them."

"We could go steal some if you like," spoke up Kimmie promptly. "Hooke probably has a few in his supply closet."

Lily gripped the back of a chair and squeezed her eyes shut. "Blast, I don't think I can wait that long…"

Kimmie eyes went even wider than before and she grinned with anticipatory glee. If she had just been thinking about using Libertentia on her boyfriend before, she was most certainly determined to do it now.

"Libertentia isn't supposed to last indefinitely… no more than a few hours at the most," Taren said thoughtfully. "You could take a sleeping potion, then be back to normal in the morning."

"Oh thank God," Lily sighed gratefully. "Does anyone have any sleeping potions?"

"Desdemona probably does," Kimmie said, hopping to her feet. She was referring to a fifth year Gryffindor they knew who'd recently developed a bit of a sleepwalking problem over O.W.L.s related stress. "I'll go borrow one from her."

"Thanks," Lily said as Kimmie trotted out the door. "And if she doesn't have any left, I don't care if you guys have to hit me over the head with something heavy. Just please don't let me go barging uncontrollably into Potter's dorm to have my way with him. I'll never be able to look him in the eye again as it stands."

Kylie and Taren laughed. "We promise."

Over in their corner of the dorm Opal, Ocean and Mallory were giggling away. They were blissfully unaware of the state Lily was in, absorbed as they were in discussing what had happened to Opal and Toby.

"I always knew he still secretly fancied you, Opal!" Ocean beamed at her twin. "He can't pretend he doesn't want you anymore, now that we've all seen the truth!"

"Libertentia never lies!" added Mallory brightly.

Lily pursed her lips but said nothing.

Rain pelted the dormitory windows, accompanied by the occasional rumble and flash of thunder. Kylie lay awake with one arm curled behind her head as she watched water trickle down the glass.

The storm had started after Kimmie had returned with a small sleeping potion bottle. Lily had gulped it down and promptly passed out on her bed, and subsequently everyone else retired for the night. Kylie, however, had been lying wide awake for an hour or two, her restless thoughts driving sleep away.

It would have been a hell of a day even without the Libertentia incident to top it off. Kylie didn't think her emotions had ever experienced such drastically different lows and highs just in the span of a few hours. It was definitely a lot to process, everything that had happened – and changed – between her and Sirius. And of course she had to contemplate what the Libertentia fallout was going to be the following morning. If Lily hadn't magically knocked herself out, Kylie was sure she would be lying awake fretting over the same thing with considerable more trepidation.

It was more than just the embarrassment of wantonly assaulting James with her mouth in front of a few dozen of her peers. Kylie had seen it in Lily's eyes when they'd overheard the Brooks twins' chatter. She knew very well what her reaction to the love potion meant, and how everyone else would interpret it.

Of course, Kylie knew that she, Taren and Kimmie had suspected the truth of Lily's feelings for a long time. She'd been keeping them buried deep down out of principle, unwilling to admit she was attracted to a guy whom she'd loathed for years.

But did Lily really loathe James all that much? The way she always thought she'd 'loathed' Sirius? It dawned on Kylie how closely their two situations had mirrored one another, and how similarly the two of them had behaved throughout.

I used to be just like her, Kylie realized. They were both guilty of fiercely denying their feelings deep down to the point of obstinacy. Why does she do it? She can't be scared like I was – Lily's the bravest person I know… But is it really just pride?

Or perhaps it's because James is finally growing up? If only just a bit, Kylie thought with a smile.

Maybe that's what scared Lily – she was running low on excuses to keep on despising James. She'd always had a way of seeing the best in people, so she must have known deep down that there was a good-hearted, charming young man underneath that cocky, overbearing adolescent. It was a young man who was revealing himself more and more to her all the time, and he was someone she could grow to love. What's more, that young man was desperately in love with her.

Maybe she wasn't ready to face that. It was just too much change to accept.

But Kylie was finally beginning to understand how pointless and self-defeating it was to hold back what one really feels - whether it's because of fear, pride, anger or anything else. For her and Lily both, it was fighting a losing battle.

You're never truly happy because you're not being honest with yourself… And you end up hurting people. She thought of Sirius and the look on his face when she'd uttered those callous, brutal words to him – the briefest flash of hurt he'd quickly covered up with bitterness and anger. That must have been the moment she'd lost any doubt that Sirius really did care for her.

And he had forgiven her, stayed the course even after her most determined, foolhardy efforts to throw it all away.

Probably because he knows I'm not perfect, so I'll occasionally make an ass out of myself, she mused with a slight grin.

Had she been expecting perfection from him all these months? She'd told him she was afraid he would let her down and disappoint her. Looking back on that now, Kylie realized she'd been such an idiot, letting something like that hold her back. It was natural to be a little scared of giving in and trusting him, but it was downright irrational to refuse to budge for him on the off chance that he would reveal himself to be a human being with flaws and that something, anything, could go wrong.

She was a Gryffindor, for goodness' sake. She shouldn't be so terrified about making a leap of faith. Especially when it seemed more than ever that Sirius deserved her trust. He'd grown up this year as well.

Starting tomorrow, I can make it up to him, she thought, fluffed up her pillows, trying to make herself more comfortable. Sleep still eluded her, and Kylie wondered if her jumbled thoughts were going to keep her up all night.

A few more minutes of tossing and turning went by. She tried to make herself count Snitches in her head, a repetitive activity that usually helped her doze off. Tonight, however, it merely reminded her out of the blue that she'd left her broomstick in the common room.

Knowing it was down there served to make her even less sleepy, so Kylie decided she might as well go and fetch it now. With a sigh, she rolled out of bed, pulled on a light robe, and tip toed out of the dormitory so as not to disturb her roommates. Not that they could have heard her with the storm raging.

She carefully felt her way down the stone steps in the dark, wishing she'd thought to grab her wand from her bedside table.

Near the bottom she halted. There was firelight dancing on the walls, and as she silently crept down to peer around the curved stone wall she noticed that the common room was empty save for a single person. Someone was seated on one of the couches near the fireplace. Only a little bit of his face was visible from this angle, but Kylie recognized Sirius immediately. He had a book open in one hand with the other leaning on the armrest, and his legs were propped up on the coffee table.

Kylie couldn't help but smile. She'd done this herself a few times over the years – taken advantage of an empty common room to enjoy some late night reading. She had never thought to picture Sirius doing the same thing, but it was rather nice to know that they shared this hobby in common.

He looked so picturesque, too, just sitting there in the flickering firelight, clad in simple dark slacks and a casually buttoned shirt with the sleeves rolled up, utterly relaxed but still managing to look poised and sophisticated without even trying. Even when he was just lounging around he was fit for a photoshoot.

She opened her mouth, but the greeting she had meant to call out didn't make it past her lips. Her eyes briefly fell upon the table in the middle of the room where everyone had gathered together the possibly drugged butterbeers and various other drinks. A sudden and wild idea came to her unbidden.

No way, I can't… it'd be mad. I don't even know why I would even want to… It's too risky!

All these thoughts rushed through her mind, but Kylie still found herself imagining what it would be like to drink Libertentia herself. She knew exactly how she would react under its effects… And yet no matter how embarrassing it would be, she couldn't help but think that there was something appealing about freeing oneself of all fears and anxieties for just a little while. The sensible part of her was having none of it, but there remained another rebellious, passionate part of her that wished she could walk into that room right now, throw away all the bollocks and just show Sirius how she really felt.

A loud clap of thunder jolted her out of her little trance. It also seemed to bring her wits back. What was she thinking? In what reality was purposefully drugging herself with a love potion a good idea? And how would Sirius feel about her doing something so stupid?

She mentally slapped herself for even coming up with the idea, and quietly snuck back up to her dormitory. There she shut herself in the bathroom and splashed some cold water on her face. For a long time she stared at herself in the mirror, wondering what had come over her tonight. She tried to blame it on the euphoria of winning the Quidditch match, or even the relief that had come from making up with him today. But the answer, she knew, was staring her straight in the face.

She and Sirius really had come to a point of no return. After all the sparks that had flown between them tonight, and not to mention the months of build up, something inside her had snapped. Or rather, something clicked into place. She knew in her heart that she was ready to embrace her feelings for him.

And she didn't need a cockamamie love potion scheme to do it.

Minutes later, Kylie tip toed down the spiral stairs. The robe she'd been wearing before had been discarded in the dormitory. All she wore as she stepped lightly into the common room was her loosely clinging white cotton camisole over matching boyshorts – typical sleepwear for her in the warm nights of spring and summer, but far more revealing than anything Sirius had ever seen her wear.

Her courage nearly failed her as her feet touched the common room carpet. Sirius had not yet sensed her presence – his attention was focused on his book and the storm outside would have muffled the sounds of her approach.

There was still time to change her mind and go back upstairs. She could curl up under the covers and wake up the next morning, pretending she'd never entertained the idea of taking the next step in their relationship – no more dancing around each other, but finally becoming a genuine couple.

There was no pressure to do it anyway. She could give herself more time, even wait out the last month of their bet until the After-Newts party and be sure she was ready.

But she was ready. It was just her usual last minute fears keeping her rooted to the spot. She'd never done anything this bold before. It was both liberating and terrifying in full measure.

How will he react? Will he reject me? What if he laughs in my face?

A second later she brushed those thoughts aside. Sirius would never laugh at her over something like this. And she couldn't believe that he would reject her outright, not after all they'd been through.

After all, she thought to herself, remembering the night they'd struck their deal. He told me I was allowed to kiss him whenever I want.

The memory made her smile and renewed her courage. She quietly let go of the breath she'd been holding and stepped into the room. Softly, she called out his name.

Sirius looked up and around, probably wondering if he'd heard right over the howling winds and rain pelting the windows.

"Oh, Kylie," he said in surprise. "I didn't think you'd be up this la-"

The words died in his throat. She'd come around from behind the couch, into the light of fireplace and in full view of him. There was loaded pause where he took in the sight of her in only her dainty nightclothes, and her tantalizingly exposed skin. He looked momentarily stunned, as if he wasn't sure he was dreaming or awake.

The almost feverish look on his face in the firelight made her feel even more daring. Without even thinking about it, she reached up to pull her hair out of its loose braid. It cascaded down around her shoulders as she sauntered closer.

"Kylie… what-"

"Shhh," she whispered. And she slipped onto his lap.

Every tendon in his body went taut, and his eyes glowed like hot coals, staring up at her. Before he could say anything else, she pressed her lips to his, slowly and tenderly. Heat ignited between them instantly, and she heard the book drop from his hands and clutter to the floor. He kissed her back, all surprise and resistance melting away. His mouth opened under her lips, and she felt the touch of his tongue. It tangled with hers, gently at first but quickly becoming more insistent.

They'd kissed before, but never quite like this. What had been a slow and lingering kiss turned into something fierce and all-consuming in a matter of seconds. All shyness and reserve long forgotten, she clung to him like a person starved and moaned against his mouth.

Desire splintered through her and tingled all the way down to her toes. She pressed and pressed herself against him, dizzy with longing. He responded in kind, moving his hands along her thighs, her hips, and backside, burning through her clothes. His fingers slipped under her shirt, roaming up her back to her shoulders, leaving trails of fire.

It was not enough. She undid the buttons on his shirt, desperate to touch him back. She could feel his heart pounding against her hands and he groaned from deep within his chest.

She couldn't think. All that mattered was him – him touching her, holding her. It was like they'd been lulled into a sensual trance. If she could have kissed like that for hours, she would have, but they both had to break away for air. He nuzzled the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent, sending delicious shivers all along her skin wherever his lips touched. She trailed kisses along his neck as well, and inhaled that same musky scent from the Amortentia. At one point her mouth found his earlobe to gently suckle it, causing him to suck in a sharp breath in turn.

Early on a distant, rational voice in her head had been urging caution, warning her against going too far. That voice had long since been smothered by the furious beating of her pulse in her ears and Kylie was way beyond caring about what was sensible or proper. This wasn't what she had intended to happen, but there was no stopping what she had set in motion. Nothing had ever felt more right than this moment, here, with Sirius.

Kylie wasn't sure when or how it happened, but soon she was lying back on the couch, legs wrapped around his waist as his weight pressed down on her and he plundered her mouth. All the buttons on his shirt were undone, and its folds hung open exposing his long, lean torso in the orange glow of the firelight. Her arms entwined around his neck, and her back arched up against his hand moving higher and higher under her shirt, boldly touching and stroking until she gasped out loud and forgot how to breathe. She didn't know how much more of this she could take before she exploded.

It was release she craved, a desperate need to satisfy the knot of pressure coiling in the pit of her stomach. This sensual but agonizingly slow build up was driving her mad. She positively ached for him.

Sirius lips went back to her neck, where he kissed along her throat and collarbone. He tugged down the thin straps of her camisole over her shoulder, giving his mouth better access as he moved down, down…

"Sirius…" His name escaped her in a soft, delirious moan. Pure instinct guided her hands as they drifted down his stomach and began fumbling with the clasp of his belt.

He grasped her hand suddenly, stopping her in her tracks. Kylie's eyes fluttered open in confusion. It took her a few seconds to register the complete turnaround of his mood. He stared down at her, breathing heavily, with traces of clarity dawning in his stormy eyes.

"Kylie… you're drugged." His voice was hoarse.

At first, she didn't understand. The love potions were the furthest thing from her mind at that point.

But by the time she did realize what he meant… it was too late to correct him. He was already hastily pushing himself up off the couch while all she could do was murmur feebly in protest.

"No, don't…"

Sirius suddenly scooped her up into his arms, surprising her into silence. Before she knew it, she was being carried across the common room as if she weighed nothing at all. He paused only briefly before the girls' staircase to deactivate the anti-men charm and then brought her all the way upstairs to her dormitory. He quietly slipped inside and gently deposited her onto her bed.

"Sirius, wait," she uttered, finally managing to gather her wits about her. But he didn't hesitate as he turned and strode resolutely out of the room.

The door closed behind him, leaving Kylie in the dark. She remained lying there for a long time, still flushed and disoriented and trying to process everything that had happened. The image of Sirius' face when he'd looked down at her on the couch, twisted into an expression of pain and self-loathing, lingered in her mind's eye.

A/N: Don't worry, there won't be another year and a half between chapters! I've even already started chapter 15 ;). Hang in there cos' we're getting close to the end! I'd say… 2 more long chapters. And an epilogue.