by rowantree 13 (Sailor Moon is owned by Takeuchi Naoko (who wrote the mangas) and was directed by many people, most notably Satoh Jun'ichi and Ikuhara Kunihiko (who also directed Revolutionary Girl Utena :)
Props go to Sasa1, since I was inspired by her fic 'Now That's Comedy' featuring outtakes from the anime Mobile Suit Gundam Wing. You rock, Sasa1!
I don't own any animes (I wish I did), and crossovers are very possible with bloopers and funny mistakes involved!
Hope you like it!
(A video camera goes on, showing at first a gray, black and white fuzzy screen, then it clears and the viewer sees that Usagi (Serena) is smiling happily into the camera)
Usagi: Oooh, the red light's on!
Minako (Mina): (off-screen) That means the camera's on, Usagi.
Usagi: (looks from left to right, confused. Well, what do I say?!
Rei (Raye): (off-screen) Try saying something in English, since this is going to be in subtitles or dubbing anyway...
Usagi: (looking into the camera, blushing into a deep red) Na...um...ah...er... AHHHHHHHHH!
(runs away from the camera, crying with jets of tears streaming from her eyes and her arms and legs flailing around)
Rei walks on instead, a sweatdrop on her head and a very exasperated look on her face.
Rei: Oh, boy... Sorry, everyone... since Usako has a case of stage fright, I might as well introduce the bloopers... (Rei is glomped by Minako, who waves into the camera, grinning wildly)
Minako: Hi, everyone!
Ami (Amy): (appearing from the side, smiling but with a sweatdrop on her head as well) We should start the bloopers now...
(Rei is getting red with anger underneath Minako, who looks down and finally sees that Rei is on the verge of losing her temper, 'eeps' and runs away, with Rei chasing after her)
Rei: (shouting off screen) GET BACK HERE!!!
(ready? and... Action!)
Usagi: (dressed as Sailor Moon) For love and justice, I'm the the pretty soldier in a sailor suit... I'm Sailor Moon! (doing all of the movements that she does with her introduction) And in the name of the moon... I will (plink)- OWWW!!! WAHHAHAHAHAHHHAAWHHAAA!!!!! OWWWIIIII!!!!
Off-screen director: What happened??!
Usagi: I POKED MYSELF IN THE EYE!!!
Off-screen director: Okay, cut! Someone get some ice!!
(okay... Action!)
Venus (Minako): Mercury, what does your computer say?
Mercury, aka Ami checks her VR visor, which flickers a bit, then seems to fade away. Ami looks surprised, then mildly annoyed. Without a word, she takes off the visor, hands it to Jupiter, aka Makoto, and walks off the set.
Jupiter (Makoto): What was that all... oh... (she grins and holds the visor's view up to the camera, showing a Microsoft error message on the infamous 'blue screen of death'.)
Mercury (Ami): (off screen, speaking into a telephone) I'd like to make a collect call to America for a Mr. Bill Gates, please.
Director: Cut!!
(and... Action!)
Jupiter: (going into her Oak Evolution stage, shouting) SPARKLING...WIDE...
Minako: Uh, Jupiter, you're saying the wrong attack.
The images behind Jupiter fade away to a greenscreen, and Makoto moves out of her pose, still in her Sailor Jupiter outfit.
Jupiter: (picking up a bundle of papers stapled together) That's not what the script said... wait.. oh, here it is, I just confused it with the third scene...
Director: Cut!
(The girls are all at Rei's house, studying)
Makoto: Can you help me do this problem, Ami?
Ami: Sure, you just... (takes the pencil and does the problem as Makoto's expression changes from confused to awed)
Rei: (having a serious look on her face, then raising an eyebrow after a few minutes of silence) Um, isn't there supposed to be a voice over or something...
Director: Cut!! Wait a sec, what... oh, oh yeah, about the Silence... the tech department's having some difficulties with that, so... okay, let's break for lunch!
Rei: (sweatdrops, then grins and points off screen, guiding the camera man toward a snack table where Usagi shot to) And guess who ended up at the table first? (laughs)
Usagi: (looking at a test score) Oh, what's Mamo-chan going to say about this?
Mamoru (Darien): (looking at the test behind Usagi's shoulder) That's a really low test score.
Usagi: (nodding) Yes, that's what he would- (stands up and screams) AHHHHHHH-ah, wha- AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! (loud crash is heard as Usagi trips and falls to the floor)
Mamoru: (helping Usagi up) Are you okay?! (laughing) You were supposed to lean against the wall!
Usagi: (smiling), since she's not hurt) I tripped!! (starts laughing)
Director: Cut!
(RING!! RING!!!)
(All the girls look up from studying in Usagi's room)
Usagi: (answering the phone) Hello?
Stranger: WHASSSSUPPPP!!!!
Usagi: (shouting into the phone as the others laugh at her expression) Shingo, why did you do that??!
Shingo: I saw it on a movie commerical, get a grip, okay?!
Umino: (talking into a hand-held video camera) Okay, I'm behind the scenes- well, in between scenes- whatever! I'm going to see what the main characters are doing, since, well, I'm the guy with all of the gossip info! (grins widely as his glasses seem to glow)
Umino focuses the camera onto Makoto, Ami and Minako, who are all at the buffet table.
Makoto: (takes a drink of water, breathes a sigh of relief) Who knew that fighting monsters could take such a long time?
Minako: (peeling an orange) It's not like we're doing it for real, Makoto. (smiles somewhat suspiciously, but poses and gives a perky grin) They also have to show our transformations and our every day lives, being Sailor Scouts as well!
Ami: (smiles) It would be interesting to do all of that... but then again, I might not have enough time for studying...
Makoto and Minako: --;;
Minako: You are so much like Mercury.
Makoto: Yes, yes you are... (grins)
Umino: (whispering into the camera) That's three of the Sailor Senshi... er, Sailor Scouts, I guess... (muttering) Darn English-Japanese translations... hey, there's Usagi and Mamoru!
Umino points the camera on Usagi and Mamoru, catching part of their conversation.
Usagi: ...that's no way to deal with this, Mamo-chan! You have to tell me the truth!
Mamoru: (sweatdrops, but gulps and nods) Okay, Usa-ko. I'll tell you the truth.
Mamoru takes a deep breath, then looks at Usagi, smiling gently.
Mamoru: Your cooking needs some work... (finishes quickly at her expression of sadness and tears in her eyes) But eventually you will, um, develop skills for it. You're a beautiful girl, and you're growing up into a beautiful young woman.
Usagi: (gets tears in her eyes) Oh, Mamo-chan!!! (glomps him tightly, making his eyes bulge slightly, but he gains control again) Usa-ko... I... need to... breathe...
Umino: (looks into the camera, grinning) Let's leave the lovebirds alone, shall we? (walking onward, sees Rei sitting in front of a fire) Whoa, I didn't know they were still filming...
Rei springs up from the flames, holding her henshin (transformation) wand.
Rei: MARS STAR POWER... MAKE-UP!
Umino gets knocked over with the force of the transformation, and the camera goes blank. After a short time, it flickers on again, with Umino staring into it, blood slowly flowing from his nose onto his shirt.
Umino: Dang! I didn't know that... that was... wait, where did everyone go?!
(turning the camera around, searching at the snack table, around the set, all over the studio. No one is in sight.)
Umino: Wait a second, is this... is this real?! Are there really Sailor Senshi??!
(Usagi, Mamoru, Ami, Rei, Minako, Makoto, Naru, and other characters and cast appear from behind scenery, props, scaffolding, all of them smiling widely as Naru runs over to Umino and hugs him)
Everyone but Umino: April Fools!!
Everyone applauds and laughs as Umino cracks up, talking with the others about how he was fooled... but Usagi, Ami, Rei, Minako, Makoto and Mamoru share a secret glance and winking at each other.
Usagi: That's all the outtakes for now, but they'll be more soon! Later on, we'll see if we can find bloopers of some of the secondary characters, other anime characters, and we'll have clips of the Outer Senshi and Starlights too!
Haruka and Michiru appear on the side, Michiru laughing, Haruka with a sweatdrop.
Haruka: (in a monotone) Be afraid... Be very afraid. (snickers and starts laughing) What do Americans see in those movies anyway...
Reviews are gladly accepted, and flames are used to make s'mores. :) Suggestions are always appreciated! Please, send 'em in!