Lux et Veritas

Chapter 1: Protocol

Author: Knowhere

Rating: Pg-13

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine, however their new backgrounds and their differences from the original characters are my ideas. The title comes from the motto of Yale University. And I don't own any of the references that I've made in the text to companies, buildings, or any other names.

AN: And so another begins. Very AU this time and I think it might fun.

Summary: Very AU. A more relaxed college freshman Rory meets a more confident adult Jess for the first time. Different backgrounds, attitudes, and behaviors for the both of them. Literati.

---

The first day. Always a pain in the ass. I hate all the introductions and the frantic scrambling of the campus. It always seems so fake. I shrug on my black jacket and look at my reflection in the mirror. I look young. Do I even like it? I haven't grown out of my black phase yet, and I wonder if it even is a phase. Someone once had remarked that I have issues I need to conquer and that I need a shrink, and that the black clothing was just an extension of my complicated psyche. I flipped him the bird and told him to mind his own business. Well, I am still young and I still have no idea what to do yet.

It's snowing outside. I like the cold. It's numbing and it serves to stop my brain from thinking. The cold can sever all thoughts by freezing them right where they begin. Oh well. The messenger bag is resting on the chair and I shoulder it, crossing it from left shoulder to right hip. The papers that I had copied an hour ago rests in my arms since I don't have much room left in my bag and the weight is beginning to dig into my shoulder.

I need to push on the front door to make it fully closed. Mental note: talk to the maintenance man about it getting fixed. It always sticks when it's cold and the weather might very likely stay cold for a while. I don't feel like wrestling with the door every time I want to step out.

The fresh snow is crunching beneath my boots as it mixes with the dirt and gravel. I watch my feet as I walk, thinking about how it dirties the pure snow. And to my good luck, I've ran into someone. The papers in my arms scatters and they land all around us. "Shit." The moisture has begun to seep into the pristine handouts that I had carefully copied not too long ago and I don't have the time to make fresh ones. I scramble to pick them up and the stranger has also bent to help.

"Sorry. I'm so sorry. I wasn't looking." The voice was female but I don't look up. She's muttering to herself about how she was clumsy and I smirk at her self-deprecation.

"Yeah, you weren't."

She looks up and meets my eyes, knowing that wasn't the polite answer even if it had been all her fault. She looks guilty and I offer her a small smile. She's baffled. "Oh."

"Well, I wasn't looking either. So not totally your fault." She peeks back up, now nervous because I was rude a second ago. And she gets that I'm kidding as she sees my smile.

"Right. Well, still sorry. It's just that I can't find my way. This campus is so damn big." She's rambling.

Finally all the papers are back in a pile and I assess the damage. Not too bad. About a dozen or so wet, and another handful with little wetness or dirt but nothing blurred on the pages itself. "Yeah, I've petitioned to get it smaller, but then the school can't brag about its big libraries and its fancy halls." Dry humor.

"Well, at least you tried."

"Anything that I can help with?"

"Yeah, if you don't mind, just point me in the right direction." She's wearing bright colored mittens and a matching scarf, but it clashes horribly with the coat she has wrapped around her. Her breath comes out in little puffs and her nose is red from the chill. I'm sure mine looks the same and I vaguely curse at my laziness for not grabbing my gloves before I left. I can hardly feel the tips of my fingers, even as I reach over the grasp the map she holds to get a better look.

"I'll do you one better. I'm heading in that direction myself. I'll walk you there." I glance at my watch and notice that I have five minutes until I'm late. On any other occasion I wouldn't mind being late, but it is the first day and there is some protocol. She struggles a little to keep up and I shorten my strides to make it easier on her. We have quite a walk still and the silence is a bit uncomfortable.

She notices. "So, heading off to class too?"

I glance down at her. Young, and she is obviously naive with a tinge of hardness. "Something like that." I was being evasive but it's more fun.

"Wow, you're really good at small talk, aren't you?"

She's caught me and I laugh. "Yep."

"So mystery man. What's your name?" She's flirting and I'm not above flirting back.

"I like mystery man much better."

"I'm sure you do." She looks up and I catch her eyes. Blue. So blue. How different we are. Cold icy blue connect with my warm brown eyes. I don't move anything except for my legs. Waiting.

She's annoyed. "Are you really not telling me your name?"

"Really." This is more fun, I want to add, but don't. It's been a while since I've done this.

"Well, since I don't know your name I can't offer to buy you a cup of coffee." Her reply is haughty and her chin might as well be up in the air. Cute. But annoying at the same time.

"You can't buy me coffee unless you know my name?" I dig.

"Nope."

"Well then, my name is–"

"–nope, I've taken back my offer." She cuts me off. She's frustrated and I can tell, but it's all playful.

"Okay. Up to you."

She shakes her head with a smile that isn't offered for me to see. But I still catch it. We're at the building and we stand at the threshold. I'm suddenly nervous even though I have no reason to be. "Okay, here it is." Another look at the watch. "Actually, I need to get going or I'll be late."

"Oh, yeah me too." She replies quickly. She's hesitating. "Okay, it was nice meeting you Mystery Man." She turns and enters without giving me the chance to reply. It's better that way. What would I have said?

I'm amused at the antics that had just occurred with her and I run by the office to refill on my coffee. The watch reads one o'clock and I rush to find the room. The door opens with a slight swish and I settle my stuff on the desk. My shoulder aches from the weight and now that its gone, it's relaxing back into place. People are rushing around to find their seat and the class is a bit on the large size. For an English discussion class, it's big with about forty student. Oh well.

Time to start. I clear my throat. "My name is Jess Mariano, no mister is necessary and welcome to your English Discussion class. This is the companion to your Lit lecture and if you're not enrolled in Lit 101, then you're not supposed to be here and I suggest you get out now." I see that some faces were unsuspecting. I blend in with the crowd of students. But now, these freshmen look bewildered. I know what they're wondering. "Okay, let's get it out of the way. I'm a grad student and your TA, so stop looking around like you're waiting for your professor to pop up at any moment." Some chuckle, others giggle, and the rest stay stoic even though I know for a fact that they want to react. "Any questions?" No one raises their hand. No surprise, this is the first day and even the clown is a bit shy if not intimidated by the surroundings.

"Okay, then. Fill this out. And at the top write down a functioning email address. If you don't like the one that the school assigned to you, write one that you do like. And if you don't care either way, I still want an address written down. I'm too damn lazy to look up each of your emails. And this will be the way that I keep in contact with you as well as notify changes in time or dates of classes. And yes, for all those who are interested, I will be emailing grades."

I see that I'm getting some looks at the wet papers. "My apologies for some of them being wet. Just make do. If it's too wet, just use a sheet of your own paper."

I eyeball the rows and leave a stack on top of each of the front desks when I get to the end I pause. Is it? Clumsy Girl is sitting there waiting for me to reach her row. Her smile is a cross between amusement and curiosity and I'm sure I'm sporting one that is identical. I reach her, unknowing what to say. She beats me to it. "You finally have a name." She whispers to be discreet. I'm glad. I want to say something but anything would be inappropriate right now, so I keep my mouth shut.

So instead I shoot her my cocky smile and return to the front of the class. Her eyes follow me and they burn a hole in my back. It's going to be a long hour and a half.

---

Students file out one by one and I wonder what I'll say, if anything, when she passes my desk. She's the last one out. Was it intentional that she packed up her things so slowly? "So now that you know my name, you going to buy me that cup of coffee?" Jesus, was I flirting with one of my students? Sometimes my mouth just runs away without me. Get a grip Jess.

She's surprised. "Wouldn't that be weird?" She's right. And plus, I'm pretty sure it's against some sort of school policy.

"Right, sorry." I feel like I should add more to my apology. "I'm sorry about this." I gesture with my hands at the space between us, but what am I really apologizing for?

She looks confused. "You're sorry about losing a cup of coffee?" She's using humor to lighten up the tension.

"Maybe." I smirk.

She turns serious. "Well, no harm done. It's not like you could have predicted that you were my teacher."

"TA." I correct her. Teacher makes me sound old and untouchable.

"Still, I'm in your class."

"Right." I lift my bag with a slight wince and gesture for her to exit first. I hold open the door like the gentleman that I like to pretend that I am.

She thanks me by offering me a small smile and I suddenly curse my age.

We stop at the front steps of the building and I can't come up with anything to say. How does one end a situation like this? "Okay, so see you Wednesday." It sounds lame even to my own ears.

"Sure." She looks amused at my discomfort, but she doesn't offer anything else in exchange. She steps down and disappears around the brick corner.

Did I hope for something to happen?

My phone vibrates and I flip it open to answer. "Hey Mom. What's up?"

"Some greeting. 'What's up' Jess, how old are you?"

"Twenty-three and a half." That'll irritate her.

"Jess. When are you going to grow up?"

"Never. I'm a toys-r-us kid. I don't wanna grow up." I chuckle at myself. She hates it when I'm so sarcastic.

She blows out her breath and I can hear it over the phone. I think I hear her mumble about wanting a girl instead of a boy. "You remember your Uncle Luke?"

"No."

"Well, you have this Uncle–"

I cut her off. "–Luke, yeah I got that memo."

"Well, we're going to be spending Thanksgiving with him this year."

"You're kidding. No jetting off to Martha's Vineyard or Tuscany this year with Dad?"

"Oh Honey, you know Tuscany is–"

And I stop her again, "–so last season...yeah, yeah, yeah." She's so materialistic even though I've lived with it for so long, it still bugs me.

"Well, I think it's high time that we spend some time with family. And I called him up and arranged it."

'High time,' who even says that anymore? Were we going to sit down for tea as well? "Mom, you mean you asked him if it was alright, or did you practically force him?" She's a tornado when she wants to be and no one has ever said no to Elizabeth Mariano and lived the next day without regretting it. She just wouldn't stand for it.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." And she doesn't. She's not kidding, and that's the sad part. "I just wanted to call you to make sure you don't make any other plans."

"I've never missed a Thanksgiving, or any other pilgrim related holiday for that matter, because there are just so many."

"Good. I'll call you later with the details. Goodbye Honey." She misses my sarcasm but that's not new. She gets to the point and expects to hear what she wants to hear. She's great at business and I'm sure that where I've inherited my stubborn behavior.

"Bye Mom." I hang up.

---

My apartment is cold and I think the heat has gone out again. Adso slowly meanders his way and inspects my bag. He's always slower in the cold. "Hey buddy. How was your day?" And that's where I end my conversation with my dog.

I grab a mug and fill it with water from the tap and I make a face at the slightly chlorine taste of it. Adso has also made his way into the kitchen and he sticks his head between my knees to look inside the fridge with me. "Well, there's nothing to eat and it's too cold to go out."

Rummaging through the take out drawer I pull out the pizza selection. Adso will be happy. He loves bits of pizza crust.

I settle on the couch that's barely enough for the both of us and turn on the televison. What a hell of a start of a new year.

---

AN: If you're wondering, the title means 'light and truth' and 'Adso' is a character in 'The Name of The Rose' by Umberto Eco. I know I've said this before, but I'm in desperate need of a beta reader and for someone to bounce ideas off of. Please email me if you're interested. If you don't want to beta but are still interested at debating ideas and/or plot lines, then please still contact me. And on another note, leave feedback because I know this is very different and I need your response. Thanks.