100 Ways to Love Your Child

Chapter 5- Problems Tend to Magnify and Spread, Don't They?

The next day, Yugi decided to give Yami's advice a try. Every time his grandpa said something annoying, Yugi would just nod. As a matter of fact, the whole "impartial answers" got him through the entire morning without exploding or even feeling frustrated. As a result, little Yugi arrived at school feeling quite chipper, and struck up a normal conversation as soon as he got to first hour.

"Well, I'm sure glad it's stopped raining. That was some storm, huh?"

"Yeah," Joey agreed, relieved to see his friend in a better mood. "This mornin' Serenity tripped an' almost drowned in a puddle!"

Tristan looked up. "The bell's about to ring, is Tea still gone?"

Just as he finished saying this, Tea hurried in with a big coat over her school uniform and the bell at her heels. She spotted their table and sat gingerly down.

"Hey Tea, where were you yesterday?" Yugi asked.

"I -- wasn't feeling well," she answered evasively.

"Why are you wearing such a large coat?" Ryou asked quietly. "We're not really supposed to wear anything over our uniforms."

A pained look crossed her face. "Well, I'm really cold, so I-"

"Gardener!" called the study hall overseer. "Coat off!"

Tea's face fell, and she slowly, carefully, and seemingly painfully removed her coat. The four boys' eyes widened.

"Tea!" Yugi cried. "What happened? You…your…I mean…"

"Your uniform don't fit any more!" Joey sniggered. "The buttons're 'bout ta bust!"

"Shut up!" Tea growled, then she winced and put her hands up to her chest. "Ow. I guess it is pretty obvious. I …well, I-"

"You got a boob job!" Tristan snorted.

"Quiet!" Tea hissed, then winced again. " I don't want the whole school to know!"

"Oh, they'll know all right," Joey chortled.

"You said it yourself, it's pretty obvious," Tristan agreed, trying not to burst out laughing.

"Yeah, dose things're huge!" Joey said, then he and Tristan both collapsed in storms of laughter.

Yugi looked at Tea all innocent-like. "But…I don't understand why, Tea. You-" he blushed a little "-looked really good already."

Tea looked at Yugi in a rather pitying way. "I looked okay…but those college girls are all so….well, they were way better-looking than me, and my boyfriend kept dropping hints on how appealing the ones with big boobs were, so I saved up loads of money and mooched off my parents and-"

"You have a college boyfriend?" Ryou asked incredulously, which brought both Tristan and Joey out of their laughter and back into the conversation.

"Seriously?" Joey asked.

"Actually, he's a professor." She slapped her hand over her mouth. "I mean- …I didn't mean to tell you guys that." She lowered her hand slowly and looked at them all beseechingly. "Promise you won't tell anyone?"

They all nodded slowly. Joey and Tristan were both wide-eyed and stifling their laughter, Ryou looked utterly shocked, and Yugi looked just plain hurt. Tea heaved a sigh of relief.

"You know, it fells pretty good getting that off my chest." Her eyes widened as she realized what she said, and she burst into to horrible high- pitched laughter. "Isn't that so funny! I didn't mean it like that! Hee hee…Get it off my chest, get it? Hee hee…"

Yugi sat in Algebra II, chewing on his pencil and feeling horribly depressed. /She has a boyfriend Yami! I can't believe it! I thought she…well, that maybe she…/

/Liked you/ Yami thought knowingly.

Yugi sunk down in his chair. /Yes/

/Well so did I. It's as much a shock to me as it is to you/

Yugi gnawed even harder on the end of his pencil. /But how could she do such a thing? I mean, this guy is probably ten, maybe twenty years older than her! That's horrible! And isn't that illegal/

/How should I know? It is morally wrong, however/

/Yeah/ Yugi accidentally bit off the eraser to his pencil. /Oops/

Yami, not noticing the separation of the eraser from its pencil, continued on about Tea. /Abandoning us for this college professor scum? Who couldn't even like her if she didn't criminally enlarge her breasts? Which she did! The wench --/

Yugi gasped at hearing such an exclamation from Yami, and the eraser lodged itself in the back of his throat. He coughed, but the eraser was stuck firmly.

You could almost hear Yami slap his hand over his mouth. /Dear Ra, I didn't mean to say that! Are you all right Yugi/

Yugi dropped his pencil and put his hands to his throat. His eyes started watering. /Yami help, I can't breathe/ He began gagging, and his face went very red. Ryou, in the desk in front of him, turned around.

"Are you okay Yugi?" he whispered.

Yugi shook his head, his eyes watering profusely and his face progressing towards purple.

Ryou's eyes widened. "Yugi? Yugi what's wrong?" The whole class was staring. Yugi banged his hands on his desk in a panic, his eyes widening and his face now very blue. Ryou leaped out of his chair. "Oh my God, he's choking!" Yugi nodded desperately. "Get up Yugi, I know the Heimlich Maneuver!" Ryou cried. Yugi stumbled to his feet, but as Ryou reached for him, little Yugi's endurance ran out, and he collapsed on the hard tile floor with Yami screaming in the back of his mind.

Yugi awoke with a splitting headache in the nurse's office. The nurse, a sweet dumpy lady, was standing over him, and when she saw him open his eyes she breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, good, you're awake! We were so worried."

Yugi sat up slowly, his head about to implode. "How did I get here?"

"Don't you remember dear?" the nurse asked kindly. Yugi shook his head slowly. "Well you were choking on something, and you passed out--"

"I think I remember that part."

The nurse nodded. "Yes, well, after that, young Ryou here--" Ryou stepped up beside the nurse, looking a little embarrassed "--he removed the object you were choking on and then gave you mouth-to-mouth until you started breathing again!" Yugi stared at Ryou disbelievingly, and the nurse gave a happy little sigh. "Well, shall I phone your house and send you home dear?"

Yugi's eyes widened. "No! No, don't do that!" He head throbbed, and he spoke quieter. "Just a couple Tylenol and I'll be fine. Really."

As soon as they'd left the nurse's office, Yugi turned to Ryou. "Ryou, I --"

"Don't bother Yugi," Ryou cut him off. "It was no big deal, really it wasn't."

Yugi waved his hand dismissively. "Oh sure Ryou, you only saved my life." He smiled gratefully at his friend. "I'm just saying, if you ever need…like a favor or something…I owe you big time."

Ryou smiled back, but deep within his mind, laughter flared up.

/It's too easy/ Bakura cackled. /Just ask the twerp for his Puzzle. The Pharaoh has no say in it, because little Yugi owes you his life/

/I can't do that/ Ryou protested.

/Do it, or I'll take over and take it by force/

Ryou heaved a mental sigh. /I can't let you hurt anybody. I'll get it for you, just give me a little time/

Before Yugi and Ryou could get back to their second hour class, the bell rang and students flooded through the hallways. Almost immediately a little redhead and a tall brunette sprinted up to Ryou.

"Ryou, is it true you saved Yugi's life?" gushed the little redhead.

"That's so amazing of you!" squealed the brunette.

Ryou sweatdropped. "Uh, yeah, well, I would've done the same for any of my friends, really --"

More girls flocked around him. "Am I your friend Ryou?" asked a girl with curly hair and freckles.

"I'd like mouth-to-mouth from you, Ryou," purred a girl with waist-length, raven-black hair.

Ryou gulped. "Well, I uh…"

/Quick Ryou, let me take over! I can help/

/But…I really don't know yami…/

/I promise you, I won't hurt anybody. I'll only take over for a few minutes to help you out of this mess/

/All right/

Yugi watched as Ryou was swept away in the deluge of young women, then shrugged. "Huh. Off to third hour, I 'spose!"