One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Author: Kimpisces

Rating: T

Summary: "Love can die but a dance can last forever. You may not be happy but at least you'll never feel the pain of betrayal."
Heero Yuy is a boy who has never believed in love
Duo Maxwell is a boy who has never felt its touch.
What happens when these two boys meet and Heero's belief that a relationship should be based around the other is put to the test against Duo's belief that love conquers all?
Who will win? Come and watch the dance.

Warnings: Angst, AU, slight OOC, Yaoi/Shonen-Ai, Relena Bashing and Language

Chapter Fifteen: A blessed moment of relief

Quatre was suddenly thrown against the wall. His father was merciless, he had always known that but he had hoped that somewhere, somehow, he had the slightest bit of love for his son.

It was obvious that Quatre had been wrong.

"Goodbye Quatre," his father said as he leered down at Quatre. "I don't need a son like you."

Quatre looked away, feeling a single tear fall down his cheek. He was so sorry that he couldn't have been stronger to prevent this from happening. Why did he have to be so weak? Why did he have to be this way? Why couldn't he fight for Trowa the way that he knew Trowa would fight for him? Why was this happening? It just didn't seem right.

Sighing, Quatre closed his eyes, not wanting to greet death with open eyes. He didn't fear death in the same way that he feared his father but he feared it all the same. His father was feared for what he could take away from Quatre. Death was feared for what it meant that Quatre could never do.

He would never get to graduate. He would never get to marry. He would never get to have a child, never mind that he is gay and would have to adopt. He would never be able to start his own company, like he had always planned on doing even though that meant that he would be sort of following in his father's footsteps.

Most importantly, Quatre would never be able to once again gaze in Trowa's eyes. Never again would Quatre be able to realize that there was someone in his life to love him.

Quatre felt a tear fall down his cheek and he didn't dare reach up to brush it again.

I'm sorry Trowa, he thought to himself and waited for the gun shot. His father had won: never in his life would he feel true happiness.

Quatre heard the gun shot. He waited for the searing pain that he had always assumed would come with dying but it never came. Quatre was afraid to think about what this meant. At least if he hurt, there was a chance that he would make it and would just have to spend the next month or so in the hospital but this. . . this meant that he had died instantly.

Tears flooded down his face now and Quatre didn't dare open his eyes but instead slid down to his knees. Why? This just wasn't fair.

Suddenly something hard fell into him and Quatre looked up shocked. His father had fallen on him and, shocked, Quatre pushed his father off of him quickly, gazing down. His father was staring up at him with lifeless eyes and Quatre whimpered at the gaze. It was almost the way that Quatre's father always looked at him and, scrambling up, Quatre moved backwards away from him.

"It's all right Quatre," Wufei said, coming up behind him and wrapping his arms around him. "You're going to be okay. Nothing happened to you, Heero took care of everything."

"You two," Heero's voice cut through the almost dreamlike state that Quatre was in, "get up against that wall."

The two bodyguards grumbled but did what they were told without much argument. They knew that without Quatre's father, there was nothing there was nothing really that they could do and Heero was the one with the gun.

"Quatre?" Trowa's voice came from Quatre's right.

Frozen, Quatre didn't know whether or not to trust his ears. Slowly he turned towards the voice and smiled as he saw Trowa standing there, looking around the room, trying to figure out what was going on. Then he looked up and saw Quatre looking at him and smiled, his eyes lighting up. Quatre didn't know if he had ever seen a better sight in all the years of his life.

"You're okay," Trowa said, as if saying it out loud would solidify the fact. He stepped forward, his arms opening a little bit and Quatre moved away from Wufei and slowly walked into them, collapsing against Trowa's chest and feeling the tears continue, soaking Trowa's shirt.

"Oh Trowa, I didn't know if I would ever see you again."

"Of course you were going to," Trowa replied. "I would never leave you."

Quatre pressed himself against Trowa, not wanting Trowa to see his tears but couldn't help but crying. The only difference was that these tears weren't out of fear or anger; these tears were in joy. Joy that Quatre was going to have a chance to have the life that he had always wanted to have with someone that truly cared for him.

"Come on Quatre, lets get out of here." Trowa whispered and moved to lead him out.

"What are we going to do about him?" Quatre asked, looking over at his father's body.

"We're going to just tell him what he was going to tell them about you. That some group got in here and took him out and we just managed to escape with our own lives. These bodyguards will back us up," Heero said as he shoved the gun in the back of one of them, "won't you?"

"Yes, just let us go. I have a wife that I would like to return to," one of them squeaked out.

"Yes, we will let them go." Quatre said with a smile. "They aren't to be blamed for this. They couldn't have gotten away with it without my father anyway."

"True," Heero agreed and then fished the cell phone out of his pocket and threw it towards Quatre who just managed to catch it. "Want to make the call?"

Quatre nodded and dailed 9-11, his hands shaking. "He-hello? This is . . . this is Quatre Winners. There's been an accident. . . someone broke into my house. It's horrible. My father. . .my father's dead. Please send help."

"Quatre Winners?" The operator asked.

"Yes, at the Winners Estate on Lexington Avenue. Please send someone."

"Of course, sir, right away." The operator hesitated. "Are you all right? Are there any other causalities?"

"No," Quatre looked around at his friends. "We're all right now. Thank you." With that Quatre hung out and let Trowa lead him out of the house to where the news reporters were sure to appear within five minutes.

The dance had failed
My heart was yours

Heero stepped out of the house into the harsh rays of the sun. He put his hand over his face, trying, without success, to block the blinding light from his eyes. Kicking at the ground, he watched as Quatre and Trowa headed to an ambulance, ignoring the reporters that plead for their explanations of what had taken place today.

Glancing around, Heero wondered where Wufei was but then dismissed the thought. Wufei had probably gone home to Meiran as soon as he had be assured that Quatre would be all right.

Everyone has someone, Heero's traitorous thoughts told him. Everyone else was worthy enough to find someone to take their love.

Heero kicked harder at the ground but then shrugged it off and looked up as a reporter came towards him.

"Can you tell us what happened here today?" One of the reporters asked him, practically shoving a microphone in his face.

Heero coughed, looked down, seeming to collect himself before looking back up, directly into the camera. "Yeah, I can." All the reporters leaned in, wanting to catch the words that were bound to make the top story at five. "My friend Quatre phoned me and my friends about an hour ago, telling us that he heard a large crash at the back of his house. We came over and went back to the back of the house to check it out. We heard a scuffle from the basement, went down stairs to find a large man leaning over Mr. Winner with a gun in his hand. Mr. Winner was dead when we arrived. We tried to stop the other man but," Heero paused here for dramatic effect, "but we were unable to detain him."

"Do you know what he was there?" Another reporter called out and Heero turned to her.

"No. Like I said, I just went back there with my friends, trying to figure out what Quatre heard," Heero answered with a shrug. "I bet it was some idiot who thought that stealing from an old man was an honourable way of getting money."

"Do you think that he will come back?" Someone else called back.

"I really have no idea," Heero replied. "Now if you'll excuse me, I want to go and check on my friend." Heero pushed his way through the crowd and went over to the ambulance.

Quatre pulled him in close for what appeared to be a hug. "What did you tell them?"

Heero wrapped his arms gingerly around the smaller man. "I told them that you phoned us about some weird sound in the back of your house. We came over, went to check it out and found Mr. Winner and a large man with a gun. I told them that your dad was dead before we got there and the man got away."

"Thank you," Quatre said squeezed Heero as tightly as he could. "I'll tell Trowa and you can tell Wufei. I just want to make sure that our stories are the same so that we don't draw up any suspicion."

"Don't worry about it. I'll make sure that we don't," Heero promised.

"Thank you."

"Excuse me young man but we need to get Mr. Winner to the hospital now." A young paramedic called to Heero.

Heero nodded and turned to Quatre. "Take care of yourself."

"I will."

Trowa nodded to Heero as he climbed into the back of the ambulance to ride with Quatre to the hospital and Heero stepped back, feeling once again lost to the world around him. Reporters called his name, wanting more of an explanation but Heero couldn't offer one. He felt horrible. He didn't want to think about this ever again. He wondered how long it would take his father to get posted somewhere else if he requested it.

With that thought in mind, Heero turned in the direction of his home, wanting to get back before anyone else told his father what was going on and to make sure that request when in as soon as possible. He didn't think that he would be able to face any of these people again.

Besides, Quatre would be sent to live in the main Winner Estate now that he was the head of the Winner Company and his father was no longer around to keep him here, out of the way.

Trowa would probably follow Quatre to his home and then pick up on the circus tour as soon as it started up again.

Neither of them would be much use to Heero here.

He would still have Wufei, of course, but he had Meiran now. Surely they would spend most of their time together, even if they didn't seem like the type of people to devote themselves to a relationship. They would make it worth and seem effortless at it. That was just how Wufei was and he knew, from the small amount o time that he had observed Meiran, that she was the same.

There was Duo but, Heero paused in his thoughts, but Duo would probably never speak to him again.

He had really blown it this time. Heero knew that he had been selfish with everything that had happened. He just wanted to make his father proud of him and yet, at the same time, he hadn't wanted to be like his father.

So much for that, he thought. Heero did exactly what his father would do. He let someone fall in love with him, feigned that he was falling as well and then hurt that person as deeply as he could. He hadn't meant to, but in the game of love, that rarely mattered.

Once you hurt someone, the hurt couldn't just go away with a small 'I'm sorry'.

"Heero!" Someone called from behind him but Heero ignored it and continued walking.

There was nothing left to do. There was no way to fix this. He had let Relena seduce him, had tricked himself into believing that Relena was Duo and had kissed her. Duo was never going to forgive him for that.

Heero didn't know if he could ever forgive himself for that.

"Heero!"

How could he ever forgive himself for hurting someone like that?

"HEERO!" Someone grabbed his shoulder and spun him around before grabbing onto him, clutching to his forearms for dear life, staring into his eyes.

And Heero couldn't help but stare back into those beautiful violet orbs.