Poetic Justice

A Drabble By: Clever Audrey (with ideas from Sneaky Cat)

Disclaimer: All things Naruto in this fic do not belong to me, nor to my fellow archivists, nor to anyone else other than Kishimoto-sama.

Warnings: Randomness. Other than that...none that I can think of. Unless you like Orochimaru. >:) No pairings.

Sasuke was frustrated.

He'd been with Orochimaru for almost a year now, and the stupid snake bastard wasn't teaching him anything! Oh, sure he'd learned some little things, but nothing really important, nothing powerful! Really, the best thing he'd learned all year had been a couple of Kabuto's healing jutsus, and that was about it!

And so during any battles he fought in, he kept his Sharingan out and scanning the fighting around him at all times, in the hopes of picking up something useful.

And, as luck would have it, today appeared to be one of those days.

Up against too many enemy ninja, and with Kabuto nowhere in sight, Orochimaru appeared to finally be pulling out one of his higher-level techniques. A flurry of seals that Sasuke's Sharingan tracked and memorized with ease, a bit of blood from the thumb, and then the spell, "Kuchiyose no jutsu!"

A large explosion of smoke, and then the outcast of the Sannin was standing on the head of a very large, grey and brown snake.

From his hiding spot in the trees, Sasuke's eyes widened. This was the same technique Naruto had used to fight Gaara! And he had seen it with the Sharingan. Pleased at the prospect of finally having learned something useful, Sasuke returned his attention to the battle.

There'd be plenty of time to try out his newfound technique later.

---

Deciding to lean towards the side of caution, Sasuke had asked Kabuto about the summoning of animals, under the guise of asking how Naruto had summoned such a huge toad.

Glad that he had asked (and that Kabuto had bought his story), Sasuke then set off to find the scroll that he was supposed to sign before he could summon snakes. Taking his chance on a morning when he knew Kabuto and his master were going to be out for several hours, he slipped into the snake man's apartments began to poke around for the scroll that Kabuto had described.

A couple of hours, many piles of clutter, dozens of scrolls and a couple of really creepy jars later, Sasuke had finally found the right one.

Sneaking out of Sound village with the huge scroll on his back wasn't the easiest thing in the world, but hey – he was Uchiha Sasuke and he would do anything necessary to get stronger. So, another hour later, he was finally outside, and in a secluded clearing about ten minutes' walk from the entrance to Sound's underground complex.

Laying out the scroll, Sasuke bit his thumb and wrote his name down the next blank line of the scroll, as elegantly as he could manage. Bloodying each of his fingertips, he pressed them down underneath his name, just as all the other signers had done, and then rolled up the scroll with a nod of satisfaction. Setting it aside for safekeeping, he moved to the center of the clearing.

Drawing up all the chakra he could muster, the dark-haired ninja carefully repeated the seals his Sharingan had picked up the other day, cried out "Kuchiyose no jutsu!" and slammed his palm flat to the ground in front of him.

For a split second, nothing happened. Then, so abruptly it left Sasuke gasping, there was a huge, smoky explosion, the soft ground under his hand changed to something hard and slick, and he felt himself rising at a very fast pace. Losing his balance, Sasuke toppled over, and looked around with wide eyes as the smoke cleared and he could see where he was.

He was perched on top of the head of an enormous, purple-and-black mottled snake.

Sasuke didn't get very far with his internal celebration of success, however, before the snake moved its head, as if trying to peer up at him.

"Who dared to sssummon me?" Came a booming, hissing voice. "Who sssummonsss Manda?"

Taking a deep breath and swallowing, Sasuke gathered his courage and slid down to perch on the end of the snake's snout.

"I summoned you. I am Uchiha Sasuke."

"You? You, little brat, ssssummoned me? Ss, ss, ss, ssss." The snake gave what the Uchiha could only suppose was a chuckle. "That isss very amusssing."

Very much aware of the fact that Manda could swallow him whole without even noticing him go down, Sasuke stood his ground, trying not to let his fear show.

"I did! And I've signed your scroll – look if you don't believe me!"

Manda eyed him, unconvinced. "We ssshall sssee."

Sasuke was about to try again, when a distant sound from below made him look down.

Orochimaru and Kabuto were standing below, yelling up at him, he thought. He regarded the two men on the ground for a moment, then turned back to the snake.

Pointing a decisive finger down at Orochimaru, Sasuke said two words.

"Eat him."

Manda looked down, saw who was being pointed at, and refocused his eyes on this Uchiha brat. "Kid, I think I like you. Hold on."

Darting back up to grab one of the spikes on top of Manda's head, Sasuke very much enjoyed the ride down as the snake lowered its head. He also enjoyed the terror on Orochimaru and Kabuto's faces as they realized what was about to happen, and couldn't do anything to stop it.

But, most of all, he enjoyed the satisfying 'snap!' of Manda's jaws as they closed around Sasuke's former teacher.

Apparently, Manda enjoyed it too, because he repeated, "I think I like you," and let Sasuke get off to stand on the ground in front of him.

"Very well, brat. I ssshall accsssept you asss my new sssummoner. You are now in charge of that ssscroll – sssee to it that you take good care of it. It'sss hard to damage, but not impossssible. And don't be sssummoning me too often, or you'll end up jusssst like your predecssessssor."

Sasuke nodded, braced himself against the wind as the king snake abruptly disappeared, and then gave in to his earlier temptation to grin.

Now, he was getting somewhere.

Owari…or maybe a sequel or two… ;)