Total Eclipse, a sea of emotion and no land…

Von Krolock sighed as he gazed at the serene, beautiful face before his eyes, and gently pulled the small, tender body closer to him. Feeling the small fingers curling in his long, gray hair, he let out a long breath as he gently touched that soft little hand. The hand felt silky and smooth, yet cold and sharp at the same time, to the degree of not feeling a bit like a human's hand. And he knew, that the hand did not belong to a human; not anymore, and it would never be again.

Seemingly just a moment ago, he almost lost her. For a while, he had actually believed that he did lose her, and that they had taken her away from him, far away from his castle, and far away from his world. The feeling of shock and pain that he had felt all the way through that moment had more than given him the torment that he had not felt in a long, long time, and it stunned him at the same time. Why was he feeling that way? He had not in the least expected losing her would be painful to such a degree, that he felt he had nearly lost his mind. He never truly felt her place deep inside his heart until he lost her, did he? And was it not until he thought he had lost her, did he begin to feel how important she truly was to his life? And in his lifetime, mortal or immortal, has there ever been someone who meant so much to him, after the death of his first love?

But now, she was here, again beside him, quietly asleep in his arms, with nothing but him with her, and feeling no one around her but him. There was a small shade of pink on her face, obviously from the fresh blood she had just consumed, and her dark red hair, still damp from the bath just a little while ago, loosely draped down her back, tickling his hand as he caressed her bony back. Her body, which was loosely covered in a snow-white satin gown and still warm from the hot water, was leaning softly against his, feeling almost like a kitten curled up on his lap and resting her head on his shoulder. The ethereal look of her mesmerized him, and for a while, he couldn't help but wonder if she truly had become one of his kinds. There seemed to be still a part of her that remained unchanged, something he could feel emanating from her that made her look and feel still alive, although he knew clearly, that every bit of mortal blood in her veins had long been drained out of her.

A low moan escaped her red little lips as her white body flinched a bit in his arms. Her small chest moved up and down with her calm breathing, and her eyelids looked as if they were about to blink, but they remained closed. Von Krolock gently caressed her cheeks, which did not wake her, and then slowly lowered his head, closer and closer to her face until he could feel his icy lips touching hers.

Her eyes opened, two big, dark pupils staring into his, and a small smile rose to von Krolock's lips as he saw her eyes moving back and forth, looking as if studying her surroundings with a child's curiosity. He then saw her smile, looking as if a blooming flower bud was slowly opening its petals, and it brought a great sense of warmth to his heart. Those big, watery eyes blinked at the same time as they looked up straight at him, almost as if attempting to look through his mind.

Gently taking her hand, he stroked her silky hair, and loosened his embrace a little. She did not look scared, or confused. And it was her, really her; here in his arms, leaning against his shoulder, and looking into his eyes.

"My love," he heard himself speak. It felt like it has been a long time since he last heard himself. He noticed her expression change at his words, and slowly, he felt a cold little hand gently touching his face.

"Love?" He heard a small, tender, bell-like voice. "You really mean that?"

He stared at her, and smiled at this question. Putting a hand over hers on his cheek, he looked deep into those dark eyes that alone seemed could speak to him.

"I thought I lost you," he heard his voice again, this time, sounding even more passionate. "I thought they had taken you away from me, and I had to admit, for a while, I really was afraid…"

"Afraid?" She smiled again, a sweet, wider smile. "Afraid… of losing me?"

He felt he didn't even know how he should answer this. Gently moving her long hair away from her bare neck, he gazed at the two red marks, looking like two fresh red drops of blood on her pallid skin. Slowly, he felt her hand on his heck, pulling his face down toward hers, and again, he felt their lips touch. He could feel himself returning her kiss, as his hand moved down from her face to her neck, then slipped lower to her chest, and slowly moved down further until it stopped on her thigh. She did not seem to mind, nor did she attempt to pull away. So lost were they in each other at this moment, that everything around them seemed to have disappeared, and that they were alone in this world of their own.

"But I am back now, am I not?" Sarah spoke when she finally pulled her face away. She took his cold hand into hers and gently squeezed it, and touched the tips of his long, sharp fingernails with her fingertips.

Von Krolock again gazed into her eyes, almost wanting to look pass them and into her heart. He heaved out a sigh as he noticed Sarah waiting for his reply, and wondered if he really should say what he wanted to say.

"You had to bring him back with you, didn't you?" von Krolock stared at her, finally able to bring out his words.

"Him?" she blinked her big eyes, as if not understanding what he had just said.

"Him, your Alfred," von Krolock mindlessly fiddled with the white satin laces on her dress, and heaved out a heavy sigh. He wasn't sure what he was thinking right now. Facing Sarah, he couldn't think of what to say next.

"My Alfred?" He sensed the bit of sarcasm in Sarah's tone. He didn't know how to reply now. The expression on her face turned into to a very strange one, then suddenly, a small, silly giggle escaped her lips and echoed in his ears.

"My Alfred? Who told you that he was 'my' Alfred? Himself?" Sarah leaned her head back, and let out another chuckle. Her tone surprised and somewhat irritated him, as it sounded almost mocking to him.

"You willingly ran out with him, did you not?" He looked away from her, forcing himself to speak. "You let him take you away, and then after, you turned him into one of us, so that he can be with you for all eternity, is that so?" He could sense his voice hardening, almost accusing.

"Is that what you think?" Sarah's voice hardened as well.

"Is it not true?" von Krolock felt his arms around her again tightening, almost as if fearing that she would escape.

"True that I allowed myself to leave with him, and true that I brought him back with me. But do you really believe that everything was going within my will? Why do you think I decided to come back after I had just 'escaped'?" Sarah's eye stared cold into his, then suddenly, her face softened again.

"He was never 'my' Alfred. Maybe he has long made himself and everyone believe this was so. But he was never, and never will be 'mine'. He does not belong to me, nor I to him," she let out a sigh as she spoke, trying to bring him to look at her again.

"Do you love him?" von Krolock heard himself ask. But the moment the words went out, he regretted them. He didn't know what kind of an answer he would receive, nor did he really expect an answer now. Why would she answer this question anyway? Why did he have to ask her? What was it to him to know?

But contrary to what he had expected, he noticed a small smile appearing on her face. A true smile, not one of ridicule. He felt her head again leaning against his shoulder, and a long sigh escaped her after a short moment of silence.

"Do you think I love him?" she spoke as she half buried her face into his hair, her voice suddenly soft like water, and he could feel her breath on his neck. "Sure that I seem to have so easily made him fall head over heels for me, but he certainly has done far from enough to make me even come close to doing the same to him. All he has been doing is following me around, trying every way he could find to get me out of here and run away with him, and insisting on thinking that I really wanted to give up everything and go with him to wherever he wanted to take me. Do you really think he is the kind who would so easily take over my heart, someone who does what he's been doing all this time?"

She took a deep breath, and licked her lips. "Alfred truly is a sweet and loving boy, and someone who can appear very interesting to a girl at a first glance. And I cannot say that he is not fun to be around and play with sometimes, because when I met him for the first time, my interests in him certainly were far greater than they are now. However, when it comes to true emotions, deep feelings, and real romance, he is as naïve as a child. He has no idea what it is that a girl like me would want or need, nor will he ever be able to give me what I truly want or need."

Von Krolock gazed at her speechless when she finished, and he didn't know whether he should be happy with what she had just said. He had not in the least expected such things to come out of her. She had changed, and changed almost too fast. Staring into her eyes now, he seemed could see the influence of her vampirism slowly taking over her. Immortality had put something into her body and soul that could never had been in her hen she was still mortal, and her eyes, her voice, her face, and her expressions… they all suddenly appeared so strange, and so different to him. This was not the innocent, naïve, playful, and child-like Sarah whom he had known anymore. What he now saw in front of him was a totally different and grown-up woman. Her whole body seemed to have transformed within a mere few seconds, and emerged as someone completely new out of her old self.

"Sarah… you surely have changed…" after a long moment of being unable to find words, von Krolock finally brought himself to speak again. "I have never thought that you would talk like this, not the Sarah that I knew…"

"You think it's a bad thing that I have changed?" Sarah stared at him with a look of passion in her eyes, and soon returned to her calm and composed state. "But isn't that what I have been looking for and wanting so much for so long? I wanted things to change, and most of all, I wanted myself to change. I have already told you, I could not wait anymore. I wanted to finally be a woman and free. The change that I've wanted is not something that Alfred could make. I can love him forever as a close friend, and a childish playmate, but his place in my heart can never be the kind of place that he wants it to be. I want changes, but the kind of changes that I've always wanted is not the same with what he would want. Do you understand?"

Von Krolock gently put a finger over Sarah's lips, and slowly wrapped his cloak around her body. He felt her arms again circling around his neck, and delicately, he caressed Sarah's face as he felt her body so close against his.

"Sarah, my love…" he whispered, and slowly ran his fingers through her hair. "I understand, I understand it all. Say no more…"

He lowered his face, and pressed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Smiling as he saw her again closing her eyes, he held her body closer to him, and watched her closely as she again drifted slowly into a tranquil sleep.