Disclaimer: I don't own Haruka nor Michiru. Nor Elza Grey. I wish I would (then I could draw as nicely as Takeuchi Naoko -). Be that as it may, the story is mine .

Author's corner:

Hello my dear readers,

today I got a nice comment of a reader asking me if I had abandoned my story called "Love is a drug". I looked at my fanfiction profile and gaped at the screen in horror. What do exams do to us that we actually forget to upload a big (about 250 pages) Haruka&Michiru story? It used to be online on but this site closed a long time ago and therefore the story actually was abandoned OO.

Right now, I have some spare time at hand and since it's Christmas and my exams are finally over yes, I've decided to read over this "old" story, correct as many mistakes as I can find and finally upload it on my profile on already wrote this story in 2002 (but forgot to upload it OO), however, the plot isn't old nor outdated. It is about love and this theme is as old as humankind itself .

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You can pray for me

But you cannot save my soul

Dig my grave but see

That I still can hear you moan

Think of my embrace

When you lose all hope and faith

You reach out for me

But you cannot grasp a dream

You hold on to me

Your illusion makes me real

Think of my embrace

In your drug's delusive haze

Take me to the time

Let it start again

Take me to the time

When it all began

We can fly so high

You'll never want to say good-bye

De/Vision, "Take me to the time"

Love is a drug

(by April Eagle)

Prologue: Empty places

"Did you bring her to us an hour ago?"

It was past midnight. It had been a long and hard day for a sadly smiling nurse. As always. The hospital where she worked was a big one. And a busy one. In one of the dirtiest areas of Tokyo.

The nurse, her name was Rumiko, rubbed her tired eyes as she walked through the twilight of the corridor. Actually, she had wanted to work in another hospital of the big city. In a more prestigious one. She was even offered a job in a private clinic one year ago. However, she had already seen the poor and the sick who couldn't afford a proper doctor. She had seen all those lost souls. Therefore, she simply couldn't pack her bags and leave. Of course she moved away. Everybody who could afford it moved away. But she stayed a nurse here at this hospital that seemed to have be built at the end of the world, on the edge of sanity. Her job wasn't paid very well, but her husband earned enough money. For him her work was nothing more than a joke, but he tolerated it. For her it was her destiny. To help those sad people who came to her from the dirty streets. To be there for them when no one else was. To say a comforting word when everyone else rejected them.

Them.

The scum of the earth.

Prostitutes. Pimps. Drug addicts. Children who had no parents any longer. Orphans who ran away from the orphanages. Children who ran away from home. Wives who ran away from their brutal husbands.

So many lost souls.

Rumiko knew that she couldn't save them. But she could at least smile when the world seemed to sneer at them. At an endlessly suffering life. She was there when so many of them did their last journey, knowing that no one would mourn when they were gone. It was easy to simply hold their hands.

Just like this time.

"Lad? Do you hear me?"

Some of them were handicapped, too. Their brains took damage from the drugs, their bodies from the rough use. But this boy seemed to be okay. Well, at least his body seemed to be okay. Better than the one of his girlfriend had been. Rumiko could see that he was thin. Too thin. As thin as they always were. It was senseless to give any food to them; they didn't eat any longer. Once the rush got into their mind, they didn't think of anything else than the white gold that should lead them to heaven. Often it really did. At least Rumiko prayed for those poor souls to go to heaven after they had died.

His hand shook as he stroked blond strands out of a dirty face. A pale face. Two eyes stared at her. They were green. Dark green. And they sparkled. Of tears the other one wouldn't cry. Rumiko was suddenly sure that this person was incredibly proud. Although he surely had seen terrible things and experienced probably worse stuff than Rumiko could ever imagine during his hard time on the street, he looked incredibly proud. As of nothing could break him. Until now.

Rumiko sighed deeply as she saw how fear flushed over his face. How he bit on his lower lip as he saw her look. She knew that he knew. At the very instant. He had known the dangerous illness his girlfriend had suffered of. He had known its deadly outcome. Always deadly.

"You brought her to our hospital, right?" Rumiko smiled, but he didn't react. He only stood there, holding a small bundle that probably once had been a backpack tightly in his shaking hands. It was dirty. As dirty as his clothes. Finally, after what seemed to have been an eternity, he nodded.

"How is your name, lad?" Rumiko stepped nearer, but still he didn't react. Didn't crouch, didn't try to run away as so many other had done. He simply stood there, staring at her with his dark green eyes. If Rumiko hadn't already seen so many scenes like this one before in her career, she would have felt uncomfortable.

"Hikari..." whispered the boy after another silent minute, but the nurse understood that this wasn't his name. It was the name of the girl he brought to hospital. A fainted girl who definitely broke down on the street outside. It was still August, right in the middle of summer, but the season had been terribly cold this year. Often, it had rained and the streets looked even dirtier than usual. It was a rough time outside and Rumiko knew that autumn and winter were going to be even harder.

"I am sorry, lad." answered the nurse truthfully, because she meant it. She tried to lay her hand on his shoulders in a comforting manner, but he jerked suddenly away. As if she could hurt him with just that simple touch. "It was too late, lad. She died ten minutes ago. The doctors couldn't help her."

Again she stared into green eyes, seeing understanding and knowledge there. Suddenly she knew that he wouldn't survive the next winter, because he was really alone now. Alone on a big, wide world that didn't want him any more. That had probably never wanted him at all.

"I am sorry."

Rumiko gulped, but she knew that she couldn't help him. Even if she offered him a place to stay and food, he wouldn't accept. He didn't believe in a second chance any more, as so many of the other teenagers outside her hospital. Her asylum. Where she tried so badly to do good, but had to see that she couldn't do wonders.

Rumiko sighed deeply while she studied the quiet boy in front of her. He was tall, but he didn't look like he was of age. Maybe he was sixteen, maybe seventeen. Maybe even younger. You could hardly estimate their ages when their skin was so grey and their bodies consumed. By drugs. By other horrors. The boy shivered and she knew that he was drug addicted, too. Now that he lost his girlfriend he would concentrate all his love on the white powder. If there was still love in the dizzy mind. If there were still other feelings left than greed and hate. Endless hate that destroyed them all. Sooner than later.

"It was a pneumonia, lad." The nurse finally managed to get her hand on his shoulder and was terrified how bony it was. The dark jacket, which was surely stolen because no one on the street could afford a leather jacket, could hardly cover the skinny body. The arms looked more like sticks. The boy before her was hardly a living human any more. He was only a cover that was left from the boy he once had been. He surely had been. Years ago. Ages ago... Now there was only this body left. Probably the soul had already gone a long time ago until only the cover remained. Patiently waiting to go, too. One day. Soon...

"She has her peace now, lad. She's in heaven." Rumiko tried to comfort him, knowing that he would follow her. Sooner than later. He already trembled like leaves in the autumn wind, an indicator of his addiction. Rumiko had seen the symptoms, had watched the cravings often before. He was desperate to give into his monkey quickly to come over the night. A long and cold night. Now even more lonely for him than all the nights before.

"Sure."

It sounded sarcastic. It sounded like someone who had stopped believing in heaven and God above. Who had stopped believing in anything. In anything else than drugs.

This poor soul...

"Rumiko-san?"

The nurse turned around as her colleague called her. Her night shift wasn't over yet and a lot of other patients needed their help. Here in this part of the city the devils never slept.

"I am coming. Just gimme two more seconds, dear." She shouted over to the other nurse and turned back towards the boy.

"Do you want to see her for one last time?"

However, she was talking to the wall. The boy was gone, had left without a trace. Not even the exit door swung slightly as it normally did. All that greeted Rumiko was an empty place.

The nurse sighed deeply and turned around. Although she felt miserable, she knew that she didn't have the time nor the luxury. Her tears didn't change anything, but her helping hands could. She had learned that lesson during her time at this hospital. Her next patient was already waiting for her. Another lost soul. Another person she was determined to help. Even if it was only a drop on the hot stone. Even if she could only rescue one life out of a million, this life was worth it.

The nurse shortly looked back over her shoulder at the empty corridor, then she followed her colleague to go over to a small girl who had lost her mother and now cried loudly for her. Maybe she could help her. Maybe she could help the next patient.

To be a nurse was simply her destiny.

Just like the destiny of the boy was to die. Soon, the way he had looked.

Poor souls...

dbdbdb

It was a place the sun's warming rays never reached. Not even during the day. Now, in the middle of the night, the darkness seemed to be even thicker. No one dared to come here. Not when there was someplace else they were able to take cover. Here seemed to be the end of the world and the ones who had to stay here, who couldn't escape any longer knew that. This place was abandoned by everyone, even the police had stopped coming here, because they felt the danger too great to actually do anything against the crime raging here. This restrict was left alone and silently everyone hoped that those who lived here wouldn't come out again. It was like a cemetery, only that the corpses were still moving. Hell was beautiful compared to this place.

A small light was lightened and a candle's tiny flame brightened up the darkness. However, it only succeeded for a miserable moment. It was too weak and the wind killed it before the shadow holding it could do anything.

"Shimatta!" cursed a low voice and someone moved through the empty alley. Nature opened its gates to make this place look even more dirty. It started to rain, hard. "Great!" The shadow groaned deeply and sighed worn out. Something jingled and another flame was born to a short life. The person jumped over a puddle and tried to find protection under a front roof, but there were only big wholes and soon a dark leather jacket was wet, too.

"Shimatta!" The shadow cursed again and finally sat down in a corner where the rain wasn't so dense. Tired eyes sparkled and as the person pulled two trembling arms around a shaking body, a silent sob could be heard. Or, to be more precise, it could have been heard if anyone had been there to hear it.

She is dead.

The person lowered her head and blond bangs hang into a dirty face. Hot tears burned in dark green eyes, but the person wasn't willing to cry. It had never helped. It wouldn't help her this time, either.

She is dead. Simply like that.

Only four hours ago I have held her and promised her to care of her - and now? Now she is dead!

Simply like that.

Simply like that.

Simply like...

Simply...

The shadow moved again a little bit and wet hair covered a pale neck. Two shaking hands reached inside the jacket's pockets and grabbed something. Plastic crackled and for long minutes, the person stared at the powder that should be white. Now it was gray.

Simply...

Another flame was born and this time the candle survived the first three seconds. A spoon sparkled in its tiny light and tears shone like diamonds in sad eyes.

Simply...

I need it anyway.

Her whole body trembled now and sweat run over a bony back. It let her shiver. Cold and heat took turns. Her mouth felt dry and her head hurt. As always. Her thoughts were getting slower and slower while her mind got more and more sober. A soberness she couldn't stand any longer, because in those seconds reality was too real. Reality was suddenly the world she was forced to live in, not the dreamland with all those nice colours. Suddenly, the memory of a laughing girl, of a crying girl was there again. The memory of a dying girl, coughing in her shaking arms that couldn't hold her back in this world, in this life.

I can take more than the usual portion.

The memory hurt more than anyone could bear. More than she could bear.

I can take all we have.

One day it could have been over. Their lives could have ended rather quickly, abruptly. Every day could have been their last. Every day, they could have gotten killed. Maybe by a pimp who wouldn't accept the likes of them any longer. Maybe by a rough winter when they hadn't found an empty house to seek shelter from the bitter cold. Maybe by one of those mad guys who belonged to a gang and wanted to have fun with them. Yes, they both had known how dangerous their lives were. However… somehow... somehow they had hoped that there would be a happy ending for them. One day... even if that meant to live in hell for another month, for another year. For another decade. It would have been worth it. Their personal happy ending. They would have fought for it. Hard. And maybe… maybe they would have survived... together. Only together. Never alone. As alone as she felt right now. Left behind. Left alone. As alone as she never felt before in her whole life. Not even when her parents left her. Not even when she spent the first nights on the street before she got to know her Hikari. Not even when she stole for the first time, tried to sell herself to total strangers. Not even when she took those wonderful sounding pills that made her life even worse... although she tried hard to ignore it.

I can simply take everything and dream. One last dream. Together with her.

For a moment, she closed her dark green eyes closed, yet she couldn't outcast the cruel world around her.

Simply...

- Don't do it! -

The voice came both from nowhere and from everywhere at the same time. She jerked around and the spoon almost escaped trembling hands. Too skilled hands to let it really fall. Those hands would rather being hacked up than losing their potion of life. Or death? Certainly of oblivion.

Nani?

- Don't do it, Haru-chan! -

She raised her head and suddenly her pale face was covered by a golden light. A light that didn't brighten up the dark night, but that brightened up a tiny, an important life. Even if it had only been for some months. A time too brief...

"Hika-chan?"

Man, I am really down! I see ghosts.

There was actually a girl standing in front of her. The girl wasn't dirty any longer. Not as dirty as she had been all her life. Her dark hair that almost reached her hips was neatly brushed. It wasn't coloured any longer in a strange, screaming red. Suddenly, the girl looked as beautiful as she had never looked before in her life. As healthy. When she had been still alive...

- Don't do it, Haru-chan. This is cowardly and you know that! -

"I am no coward!" screamed the blonde loudly and stood up with a sudden. The jacket fell down on the street and if there had been an observer he would have seen an angry girl shouting at thin air. A very skinny girl with short blond hair who was often confused to be a boy. Who didn't want to be a girl. Not after she had seen what devils could do to little girls. Not after she got to know that the world was crowded with them: ugly, old devils who did not only want their souls, but also their bodies. Who had only one goal in their ugly existence: to destroy them.

They all did win.

A long time ago.

"I am no coward! I survived this hell! The last thirteen months! You know that too well, Hika-chan!" The blonde took a deep breath and more tears sparkled in her eyes. She knew that she had finally snapped. She was talking to a ghost, for heaven's sake! But she didn't care any longer. They had taken everything away from her. She had fought so hard during the past weeks. For something that might have been called home. For something that might have been called love. For something that might have been called peace. Hikari took it all away with her.

I am really nuts!

- It is wrong, Haru-chan. It is so damn wrong. You have your life before you. -

"Just the way you had your life before you? I am not blind, Hika-chan, we share the same destiny. And be sure, I don't want to end on a dirty street, coughing myself to death!"

I didn't...

"No, of course not! Because I have been there. I took you to a hospital so that you could at least die in a bed. In a warm bed! You will get a proper funeral or whatever the hospital calls proper. I don't want to be thrown away like rubbish!"

I interrupted a ghost.

I am REALLY unfriendly.

And mad. Surely. As mad as a hatter. It had been too much for my brain.

But this stuff is really good. That guy was right.

I shouldn't interrupt my best friend.

Even if she's dead.

I am talking to the dead!

I am mad.

Is that good? Well, can't get worse, can it?

The blonde grinned a mad grin as she turned back to her place. As she took the spoon again into her hand and held it carefully over the flame.

- But you are young, Haru-chan! Your whole life lies before you. -

My whole life lies here. In fragments.

"My whole life is over, Hika-chan. You know that." answered the tall girl silently and sighed deeply, still staring at the spoon and the content that melt slowly.

- It... -

"Hell, in what kind of a fantasy world are you living, Hika-chan? Or were you..." The tall girl groaned and shook her hurting head. It seemed as if thousands of energetic sledgehammers wanted to destroy it. "I am long infected, too! It's pretty normal on the street!" the blonde gulped and sighed. It sounded defeated. No, she had never given up. Never in her entire life. She was a fighter. Whatever they did to her, however they humiliated her, how often she fell down, she always stood up again. To show them her pride. And her will to carry on. Together with her best friend. Now, however… now it all wasn't important any longer. Now, everything was over. Hikari had died and her soul had died together with the once so pretty girl.

Maybe it's better this way.

- NO! - The appearance stepped closer and fear sparkled in brown eyes. - No! That can't be! We never... -

The blonde gulped again and shook her head.

"Can you remember when one of your... your clients hurt you? When he took a knife and I could only hinder the worst? I touched your blood."

- But I told you to NEVER touch me when... -

"Shimatta! You were hurt! I can't push away the ones I love when they are hurt!" screamed the tall girl tortured and raised her head again. Her look was covered with tears. She froze like hell while sweat ran down her trembling body. Shadows under her eyes let her look like a zombie.

Say it! It's your last chance!

Say what you never said when she was living!

But she's a ghost. She's only a product of my nutty brain!

Is that a problem?

Does that really count?

No...

Her stomach hurt and she felt sick. Her hands trembled even more and sweat ran over her icy skin. Her breath formed a little cloud in front of her face.

"I... I've loved you, Hika-chan. Didn't you know that?"

It was not even a whisper. Her lips moved, but the words sounded more like a croak.

The shinning girl smiled sadly, because it was the first time that her best friend, the always so distant, always so wild tomboy, had admitted her feelings so openly. Of course she had known about the other one's feelings. Of course Hikari had seen it in dark green eyes. Nevertheless, she had known that she would have never been able to give the blonde what she wanted, what she needed. What she deserved. Hikari had known from the beginning that the life that was left for her had been too brief to make her best friend happy.

- Your happiness would have cost you your life, Haru-chan. -

"The same does my desperation." Whispered the tall girl and turned her head away. Finally, her work was done and she searched for her injection. It was old and she hated it. It hurt a lot, but she hadn't been in the mood to steal anything at the hospital. As she had stolen so many things before in her life.

- NO! -

The shinning girl went on her knees, but the mud on the street didn't even dirty her white dress. The blonde gulped as she filled the injection.

She looks so beautiful.

Her hands shook as she prepared her left arm. It was skinny and covered with tiny scars she would never get rid of again.

Once, when she had been a small child, her mother had told her that every scar would disappear until her wedding. Now, however... now, she would never have a wedding. She would never find someone who loved her. There was no time left for her. There was not even a life left for her...

Mommy...

Daddy...

As there were no parents any longer for her. They left her a long time ago. Left her behind in a rough world that didn't like her. That didn't want her at all.

"No one needs me, Hika-chan. No one wants me." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she pushed the injection into her skinny arm. It hurt incredibly but she was willing to sustain it. She had felt worse pain in her life before. It was tiny compared to the storm raging in her heart. In her soul.

- Haru-chan! Please! -

"There's no one here who would love me." The blonde bit on her lower lip as the fluid ran into her arm. Into her veins. "I am rubbish, you know that." She whispered and felt the heat growing inside her body. The tension she had always felt. From the beginning. From the first drugs she had taken - as pills, then. Soon, she had needed more. More and more. Stronger and stronger pills. Finally, her first painful injection followed. First, she had only needed one per day. In the end, she had craved one almost every hour.

- This is too much! - screamed the shinning girl, but her hands couldn't grab the injection. Helplessly, she had to see how her best friend took everything that was left from their last "shopping tour" as they had called it. She had even taken Hikari's potion, as well.

Potion of power.

Potion of strength.

Potion of forget.

Potion of death...

"I'll see ya on the other side. I luv ya..." whispered the blonde and leaned her head against the cold wall behind. Her messed bangs hang into her forehead and her face was wetted. Whether it was caused by the rain or by her own tears running down her cheeks, wasn't even clear to her any longer. She had never cried. Never in her life. No matter how hard, how dirty, how terrible it got.

That's it.

Suddenly, out of the blue, she was reminded of one of those cartoons she had loved so dearly as a child.

As a child... had it really been so long ago? So long ago that she had sat in front of the expensive television set and had watched those movies while her father had read the newspapers? So long ago that her mother had been in the garden to care for her roses she had loved so much?

That's all folks.

Hai, that's all folks. The show is over. Finally over.

She closed her eyes and sighed deeply.

I am going home. Finally home.

To a home that had been destroyed just two years ago...

Suddenly, she could feel how soft lips touched her own, but she was already too far away to answer the sweetest touch in her life. To answer the kiss that meant so much. The kiss that came too late. Much too late.

Why?

The tall girl wanted to react. To feel again that comforting embrace she had felt so often during the past months. During the past winter. During this damn fucking cold summer.

Why...

- Don't worry, Haru-chan. There're people out there who need you. Who will love you with all consequences. You are a loveable girl, Haru-chan. Just don't give up. Fight. Do what I never could. Live! Believe me, it's worth it! -

Hikari's voice died away, but she couldn't do anything to hold it back. As she hadn't been strong enough to hold the girl back some hours earlier that night.

Every thought was gone as she saw the bright light. It looked like an explosion of all the colours of the rainbow. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. It warmed her heart and suddenly she didn't feel alone any longer. There was someone standing before her. Someone she didn't know. Nevertheless, she had the strange feeling that she had known that person all her life.

Who are you?

She wanted to scream out loud as the firework increased. It hurt in her eyes. Even through her eyelashes. All of a sudden, there were planets flying around her and she wasn't on the dirty street any longer. She flew herself! Deep beneath, she could see the earth. And there, right beside her, there was the sun. And there... she turned around and saw some other planets. Bigger ones. With a lot of rings.

Where am I?

There was happy laughter as the shadow came nearer.

You are home.

The laughter got lighter and suddenly she felt warm arms around her body.

I love you.

She frowned, but wasn't able to react.

I love you, daddy.

At that moment everything went blank.

dbdbdb

I shouldn't have come to this place.

She hurried down the street, wrapping her thin jacket tighter around her freezing body, cursing herself for not wearing her winter coat. It was in the middle of February. Even though Christmas had been warm and everyone had thought all January of an early spring this year, she should have heard of her sister this morning. Of her warning words. That the sky looked like snow. That the temperature would decrease quickly. However, she didn't listen and now she was in trouble. Not only to get a flu, but also to be attacked.

She speeded up until she almost ran. The steps behind her speeded up, too. They belonged to four guys who didn't look very friendly. Surely they wanted her money. She looked too rich for that region of Tokyo. Hell! She was rich! And popular. Okay, those guys probably didn't know her, they had surely never heard any classical music in their lives. Nevertheless, they knew how expensive her boots were and that her little handbag contained more than just cheap lipstick or some coins for the subway.

Shimatta!

Still, she had to come to this place. Hell, she had been here quite often. In search of her partner. Her partner by destiny and maybe, maybe even her partner by heart. She didn't know. She had stopped to believe in love when she had been ten. Yet she believed in family. Her sister told her that lesson. And she believed that the one she was searching for belonged to her family, as well.

Shimatta!

She cursed again silently. Yes, she had been here before. She couldn't count all those times and she knew that her sister would go insane were she ever to know what her little sister did after school. What she really did after her rehearsals. What she actually did after her concerts. Of course her sister wanted to accompany with her. To search with her for the one. To be able to complete their mission one day. Hopefully soon. To be free again. To stop fighting. To save the world. A world that wasn't worth to be rescued in her eyes.

But Sissy is worth it.

And Elza-chan is worth it..

And Orpheus.

And mommy.

And daddy.

Therefore, she kept searching. Of course she had wanted to search together with her sister. However, every time she got that strange feeling, every time she saw how the sea got wild again, she simply had to go and search for it. Alone, because she always feared of her sister needing too much time to reach her. The feeling could be gone by then. Another wasted chance. Another wasted calling of the sea. Or of the one calling out for her partner. For her… Making her search harder and harder… and even getting into trouble for her.

It never helped. Why should it help this time?

She sighed deeply and held her handbag tighter. Her high heels were not very suitable for the winter and she slipped more than she walked.

A taxi.

A taxi!

She turned around, but there was no yellow car around. Only some dirty ones rushing by, not noticing her. She stroked some strands of her wild, sea green hair out of her face and wanted to cross the street as a rough hand grabbed her and swirled her around.

"Hey, beauty! Where are you going so all alone?"

She made a face as she saw the unshaved, ugly face in front of her. The big guy who was about two heads taller than her was obviously dead drunk. His breath stunk like an opened whiskey bottle and she didn't like the cruel grin on his violet lips.

"Don't you want to have a little bit fun, beauty? I know there a good club..."

"No! Thank you!" She tried to turn around, but he held her tighter. "Let me go!" she screamed, suddenly filled with panic. It was already dusk, her sister would be concerned about her. "Let me go!!!" Her scream died away as he pulled her near and covered her mouth with his big hand. Her eyes grew wide and she tried to reach her into handbag. To touch a special stick she always wore with her.

You bastard!

Sailor Neptune...

But she wasn't able to reach it, because she was suddenly pushed away. The big guy grunted and turned around. The next moment, he groaned and went onto his knee, holding something between his knees very tight as if it hurt a lot. The other guys, probably his friends, tried to avenge him. However, they didn't stand a chance. One lost a tooth, the second one got a broken nose. They wanted to react, to fight, but there was a shadow between them. Too fast to be caught. Too skilful to be kicked back. So they ran away as soon as their leader could stumble again. Still groaning and screaming for revenge... later.

"Everything okay, young lady?"

The rich girl still held her handbag in her trembling hands. Her face was pale, her eyes teary. Surprised, she starred at another girl who was crouching over her, smiling friendly and reassuring, letting her now that the danger was over. At first, the rich girl thought about her as a boy. Her blond hair was cut extremely short for a girl and she wore pants. You couldn't see any female outlines under the wide winter jacket she was wearing. But her face was definitely female. It looked unreachable, but the same time soft. Dark green eyes sparkled and there was still that tiny, encouraging smile on so tender looking lips.

"I..."

Her blue eyes grew wide as the rich girl saw the sign glowing on the blonde's forehead. A golden sign. A sign she knew too well. Then it was gone. From one moment to the next.

Was it only an illusion?

Startled blue and asking green eyes met and silence evolved between them.

She looks familiar.

A car went by splashing them slightly with water. Finally, they both awoke from their trance. The rich girl jumped on her feet and jerked back while the other one only wiped away the dirt from her jacket.

"Arigato!" the sea green haired girl bowed deeply and grabbed the other one's icy hand. "You helped me a lot. What's your name?"

She felt how the other girl stiffed but didn't let the soft hand go.

"I am Tenô Haruka. Always to your service, young lady."

"My name is Meioh Michiru." Answered the rich girl and bowed again. "Really, thank you. I am not sure if I would have defeated them so easily." Michiru heard a gasp for breath and as she looked up she saw how Haruka went on her knees. Her face was suddenly covered with sweat and she leaned herself against the glass of the buss stop that was next to them.

"I shouldn't do that any more. I know that I am not that strong any longer." She panted and closed her eyes for some moments. As she opened them again she winced wildly, because the other girl knelt suddenly in front of her, looking as concerned as no one had looked at her for quite a long time. Not the doctors, not the always so friendly nurses. They never looked concerned, they all looked sympathetic. Sympathetic with someone like her.

She doesn't know who I am...

Michiru smiled and without thinking she raised her right hand to stroked through sweaty strands.

Does she know who she is?

"It was a little bit exhausting to beat them all up, wasn't it? They were big guys." Smiled Michiru and didn't want to lower her hand again. Those strands felt so soft, she wanted to stroke them for eternity. Green eyes followed her motions watchful, almost fearful. However, she didn't utter a word of protest and Michiru knew suddenly that this girl was damn proud. That she would have never shown any fear.

"No, it wasn't them." Smiled Haruka, but it was a tired smile. "It was me." She took a deep breath and came to her feet again. "Better you call a taxi, young lady. You don't live in this district, do you?"

"No..." Michiru took her cell phone out of her handbag and screamed silently as she saw the message her sister had sent her. Her words didn't sound very friendly.

Shimatta!

Sissy is right. I shouldn't hang around here without her.

She will be very angry with me now...

Michiru dialled a number and ordered herself a taxi. For herself and for her rescuer. Whatever the other girl did in this district, she had to take her with her. She was the third person of a family of four. She was the other senshi she was looking for. She was the other one who would search with them for the talismans.

Shimatta!

Iknow that I shouldn't exhaust myself any longer!

Haruka opened her jacket and took a deep breath. Some kids ran by but she didn't notice them. She only noticed herself and the small being she had to take care of now.

"I ordered a taxi. Can I take you..." Michiru turned around and gaped as she saw a soft smile on a pale face. As she saw how Haruka stroked over her belly with a dreamy look on her face. Over a grown belly.

"You are pregnant?" gasped the rich girl. Haruka's green eyes darkened as she looked up. Every emotion was gone from her face as she studied the other girl. As if she had only realized right now that she had talked to a stranger, a total stranger over the past five minutes. That this wasn't good. Not good for her, not good for her baby. And especially not good for Michiru.

She grew up in another world.

She lives in another world.

She would never understand mine.

Haruka knew it, nevertheless, it hurt somehow, somehow. She didn't know why, but suddenly she felt disappointed. As if she had lost something important. Something she couldn't remember of ever having owned.

"You are pregnant? How?" Michiru was suddenly as white as a wall. She grabbed for the next streetlight to regain her balance.

Haruka didn't answer. She closed her jacket carefully, still staring silently at Michiru. As if she only waited for the rich girl to freak out. To shout at her. Like so many other people had done. During those long months that lay behind her. People who didn't understand. Who simply didn't want to understand that someone like her wanted to have that child. That someone like her didn't abort it. That someone like her actually loved it long before it was born.

She is pregnant?

But the stars told me that she's my partner.

Is she married?

Does she have a boyfriend?

Nani!!!?!!!

At that moment a car parked and honked. Michiru looked away and saw the taxi standing at the kerb. The taxi driver didn't feel secure in this dirty district of Tokyo and mentioned her to hurry up. Michiru nodded and wanted to turn towards the blonde to simply grab and to pull her with her. They had enough time to explain everything later. Finally she had found her, the third Sailor senshi. She wouldn't let her go again. Even if it meant that the third outer senshi would be a mother.

A mother?

At that age?

She can't be much older than me!

Michiru turned around and froze.

Because the place where Haruka had stood only a few seconds ago was empty.

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"Michi?"

It was dark outside the balcony. It was in the middle of a night. A beautiful night full of glittering stars. The moon was only a sickle. Therefore, they could see a lot of planets. It was warm outside. May was almost over and a hot summer would follow. The people at TV and radio said it on the news, non-stop, and she believed them.

"Michi?"

The tall woman saw her little sister standing at the balustrade, staring up to the sparkling universe around them.

"Go to bed, Michi. You have two concerts tomorrow."

"Hai..." the voice was husky. Not from sleep as the tall woman knew too well. She sighed deeply and stepped behind her little sister to take her into a comforting embrace.

"Can you feel it, Sissy?" whispered the smaller woman after a long time they had stood this way, staring up to the stars, each of them thinking their own thoughts.

"Hai." Answered the tall woman and tears sparkled in her dark eyes. "Of course."

Her sister sighed silently and wind moved sea green and dark green hair. Let them both shiver slightly. Still, they didn't want to go back into their house. To go to bed. To sleep. To be haunted down by another terrible nightmare.

"Tonight, the fourth outer senshi was born."

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She felt incredibly exhausted. As tired as she had never felt before in her entire life. Her whole body hurt, her mind was dizzy and her thoughts seemed to have the character of old honey. Tough and hard. However, at the same time she felt happy. Incredibly happy. For the first time for ages she felt free. It was a fantastic feeling. Having done something that was good. That was unique. That had been her own will.

The be she was lying in was hard and uncomfortable. She sweat incredibly under the thick blankets and she could hardly move because of the pain. More than one injection was inserted in her arms. Arms that were now a little bit thicker than they had been nine months ago. Those injections would add some more scars to her skin, but she would be proud of those scars. All of her life.

She was not alone in the room. There were two other women. They were older than Haruka. Much older. They were maybe twenty eight, maybe twenty nine. Flowers covered their beside tables. There was even a husband there, whispering excitedly with his wife. Haruka's bedside table was empty. There was only a cup of cold tea next to an empty vase. There was no one who would visit her. Not today. Maybe tomorrow an old woman would come to see that she was old enough to take care of her. That they couldn't take her away from her.

Haruka turned her head as the door was silently opened. Her tired face brightened up as she saw two nurses entering the room. Together with a doctor. One of the women held a bundle in her arms.

"Tenô-san?" asked the doctor as he controlled her pulse, her eyes and her heart beat. "How do you feel?" He knew her story, her dark past. At least what the police and the other doctors had told him. However, he had never said a single word about it. Right now, he only smiled at her. Visibly proud that she had made it.

"Better." She answered, although she felt as if a truck had run over her. Yet, she didn't want to tell him. She only wanted to see the bundle in the nurses' arms.

"She is very small and we have to do some more checkups, but you may hold her for some minutes. Is that fine with you, Tenô -san?"

All Haruka could do was to nod. Suddenly, her throat was thick and her eyes filled with tears. Tears of happiness. She gasped for breath as she felt the bundle in her arms. The smaller nurse smiled. She was young. Different from her older colleague who only made a face and left the room as quickly as she was allowed.

"Congratulations, Tenô-san." Said the nurse and stroked her long, blue hair behind her back. "She is a beautiful, little girl."

Haruka gulped and nodded again, not being able to say a word. She only watched the little girl. Lying there in her arms. Feeling safe and secure. Feeling loved.

Hell, how much she had already loved that tiny being who had changed her whole life - to the positive!

I love you, little one.

Do you know that?

Do you know that, Hime-chan?

She gulped and for the first time she could remember tears ran down her face. Although she had to blushed deeply, she couldn't hold them back. Haruka squeezed the baby carefully, stroked over fluffy dark hair with a trembling hand. The little girl opened tiredly her eyes and blinked dreamily. Dark green eyes. The same eyes Haruka saw every day when she looked into the mirror.

My little one...

"It's okay to cry." whispered the nurse and smiled friendly. "She is someone special, right?"

I wish Hika-chan would see you, Hime-chan. She would have loved you, as well. I am sure.

Everything Haruka could do was to nod again. And to hold the tiny life in her arms. A child so small and so weak but yet so strong to rescue her mother's life.

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"Whatever it takes, we need to find her!"

"Hai."

"We need her to find the talismans!"

"Hai."

"We need her to rescue the world!."

"Hai."

"We need her, because she is an outer senshi, as well!"

"Hai..."

And I need her to be my soul mate...

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