Title: For Them

Author: Katreal

Type: Short POV

Notes: I just wrote this due to some random plot bunnies that are trying to steer my attention away from Chaos Rising and into the Megaman/Rockman fandom. This is a very short passage in X's POV about the wars and his existence.

Sometimes I wonder…could things have turned out differently? Sometimes I feel as if this entire war is my fault…that all the lost lives were my fault…I wonder what the world would be like if Dr. Cain hadn't found my capsule in the first place. Sure I wouldn't be here…but…all the people who died due to the Maverick Wars would still be alive.

In a very indirect way the war is my fault. If Dr. Cain didn't find me he wouldn't have duplicated my design. If that had happened Reploids wouldn't exist and…Mavericks wouldn't exist.

Sometimes I wonder what would have happened. Could the entire thing have just been avoided? Would the deaths, the destruction, the sorrow never happen?

I know I shouldn't be thinking like this. Zero would hit me over the head with his saber if he ever found out. But…sometimes…sometimes after a hard battle or a patrol around the ruined city I can't help but wonder.

The fighting…that makes it even worse. Did you know that I hate fighting? I'd rather throw down my weapons and be killed by another if it meant I never had to kill anyone else, friend or foe.

But both humans and Reploids look up to me, I have to fight…for them. I fight so that they don't have to. If anyone should get their hands dirty it should be me…

To them I am a hero…I'm still not sure how I should react to that. At first I had been flattered, who wouldn't be? But now I can't stand it. Why do they cheer for me? Put their hopes in me? In the end I'm no better then those I fight, those I kill. I just want to yell at them sometimes, wave my arms in the air and scream; don't they realize that this is all my fault? I'm not their savior, I'm the one who caused this forsaken war.

If Dr. Cain had never found me, never activated me, never duplicated my design to build hundreds upon hundreds of Reploids(a good portion of which went maverick) there would be no reason for them to cheer. There would be no war. Their loved ones would not have died. Their homes would not have been destroyed.

I think too much of myself don't I? I blame myself for all of this but my rational side said that something would have happened anyway. Maybe this war would not have happened…but eventually another war would. It seems to be in the human nature. They cannot stop fighting. History is like an endless waltz, a dance consisting of war, peace, and revolution…(1)

Heh…now look…I'm contradicting myself. I'm such a hypocrite. But, I digress. No matter how I feel, I must fight. Let me wonder and wish all I want, it won't change a thing. I must be strong and fight for the here and now, not some imaginary world in my dreams. I must do my best too prevent anything worse from happening to them…if I don't…who will?

Who am I you ask? I am Megaman X, commander of the 17th unit of the Maverick Hunters.

But…there is more to me then just a name or a title. I have my doubts, my dreams, my wishes, my fears. But I also have my duty, my comrades, my friends. Just as I wish I never existed, I cannot do anything about it. I cannot just leave all the people alone. They depend on me to protect them. I cannot abandon my unit, just as I cannot leave Zero to shoulder this burden alone. They put their lives in my hands every day and every battle, trusting me to protect them or to help them. The least I can do is live for them.

Yes, that is the real reason I'm still alive. For them, not myself. It is my fault that this war started, I won't die until it's over.

"Oi! X, you promised we could go to town tonight, remember?"

X glanced up from his journal to the blonde-haired repliod standing in the doorway. With a small smile he nodded, "Hai Zero, I'll be right out."

"You'd better!" Zero said cheekily, disappearing into the hallway with a flick of his long golden hair.

With that same smile on his face X closes the worn journal, slipping it into it's hiding place in his dresser. He then exits the room to follow his friend, those two words burning in his mind.

'For them…'

(1) If anyone can tell...yes this is from Gundam Wing n.n;