Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

Author's Note: I'm hyper off coffee and I just wanted to post something and since apparently this one is my most popular story I will conform to your reviewing. I've read it over. This story is crap but whatever, more crap down the pooper.

Baby Sees Red

I'm a baby. I'm a baby. I'm a baby. Did you hear the news? I'm a baby

"Gurgle gurgle. Gurgle gurgle. Gurgle gurgle. Gurgle gurgle gurgle? Gurgle gurgle."

"Aww look Sasuke! Isn't that cute baby Arashii is trying to speak!" my big blonde Mommy says in that condescending voice of his. Does he think I'm an idiot? Does he think I can only understand high pitched frequencies of annoyingness?

Look man-woman-thing! I'm a highly intelligent creature, such as….yourself…..well…maybe not like you, more like daddy. But anyhow, I'm smart! This is discrimination, you agist! Humph!

"Gurgle gurglegurglegurgle! Gurgle gurgle gurgle gurgle, gurgle…..gurgle…..gurgle…gurgle gurgle gurgle, gurgle gurgle. Gurgle gurgle, gurgle gurgle! Gurgle gurgle gurglegurgle, gurgle! Gurgle!"

"So cute! Squeal! Hey….? His eyes…they're turning red. Sasuke! It's your fault. I don't want a sharingan baby! I want my cute little blue eyed baby back! Bring back my baby."

Hmmm, how are you going to respond Daddy?

"Hn."

That's it? I thought you were cool. How could you? T-T You were my hero. You're just a lame chicken head!

"Sasuke! Now he's crying! Do something! Or…no sex until he's out of the house!"

Quickly Daddy rips me out of Mommy's arms.

"Come on stop crying, stop being angry, stop using sharingan." Then quietly he whispers to me, "I know he's not serious but it's still a couple days without sex if you don't stop. You've been in me. You know the trouble I've seen. So please for the love of Naruto stop!"

Giggle. Daddy's funny. He's pathetic. Giggle.

"Oh Sasuke you did it! I didn't know you had it in you. I never knew you were a baby whisperer! You're so sexy! Come on let's try for another one."

Daddy quickly drops me in the crib and rushes off to the room with Mommy.

WTH! This has got to be against the law. Damn if only Mommy wasn't the Hokage. Humph!

Author's Note: Yup. More crap. Well you can review if you want.