Lily: Hey peeps, the downstairs compie is now functioning wit Internet so I'll use this and update for now since my compie is still out of commission. I got this idea from watching too many teen movies and then attempting to read some Harry Potter ff. J'espere que nous amuserent

It was a dark and stormy day when Draco Malfoy came up with his plan. Really it was quite a bad weather time for Hogwarts and Draco had been in a foul mood all week. Nothing made Draco's mood better and everything made it worse but the one thing that put him in a mind to kill was Harry-bloody-Potter.

"Look at him!" exclaimed Draco, watching Harry laugh gaily with his sidekicks.

"Who does he think he is laughing like that? You'd the think the whole bloody world was made of money or…or candy." Crabbe tried to make a remark but failed miserably and decided to stick to his steak and kidney pie. Goyle was in the infirmary from a rather malignant rash originating from somewhere below his waistline (so Draco didn't know the specifics). Pansy was nowhere to be seen, she was most likely making out with her newest man-toy. Had Draco taken care to notice, he would have seen someone from the Gryffindor table was missing as well; but he didn't and thus we don't learn who it was or why it was significant until later.

"Harry Potter thinks he's so bloody amazing. All smug with his friends and…and victory," Draco snarled, glaring daggers at the slender Gryffindor as he bit delicately into a pancake. Crabbe tried (and failed) to say something again but Draco wasn't paying attention. A little light-bulb had just gone off in his head and he had the most amazing idea.

"Crabbe, what is it that people always think I am but I really am not?" Draco asked, eyes boring into the endless enchanted ceiling.

"An arsehole.." Crabbe mumbled through his blueberry muffins, Draco scowled.

"No!"

"A bum bandit?"

"Well that I actually am...sort of."

"A muggle loving softie on the inside of your hard cold pureblood exterior?"

"Gods no Crabbe! What do you think I am, some kind of fan fiction character?"

(Crabbe and Draco suddenly look around the great hall suspiciously and the authoress sneezes as she writes)

"It's a magical creature Crabbe…what was its name again? Veera? No. Veelie? No. Vee…"

"La! Veela!" Crabbe cried excitedly. Draco rolled his eyes and petted Crabbe's big stupid head,

"Very good old man, shall I give you an award?" he said sarcastically. Crabbe, not comprehending the sarcasm understood the word "award" which to him had become the same as "candy from Draco's mother". Drool began tocollect in the poor idiot's mouth. Draco sighed and shook his head but a brilliant plan was already forming in that lovely blond cranium. It was then that the clouds parted and sunlight shone on Draco, he smiled his wicked smile and went to the library. He had some studying to do.

Lily: Chapter one. Short but I've no time, this isn't my compie and I'm on a limit. But next chappie we find out what all this madness is about!