Cyclops's Bad Medicine

Hey there, folks! L1701E here! Hello to all my friends in the Misfit-verse! Sorry I seemingly left, but I had no ideas for fics until recently. Now, I read this hilarious GI Joe fic called "Bad Medicine" by LokiLeysmith, and it hit me! What if what happened to Hawk in that fic happened to the X-Men's resident optic blaster? Let's find out, shall we? Thanks to LokiLeysmith for the inspiration, and I hope I don't end up copying your fic…

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Marvel Comics, Red Witch, and others. And here's your quote: "You dare to presume to order around Mentok- The Mind Taker? You shall suffer for your foolishness." - Hawk as Mentok, the Mind-Taker, from LokiLeysmith's fic "Bad Medicine"

Chapter 1: Great Scott!

The Danger Room

"Man, I got a bad feeling about this." The blond, red-goggled Joe sniper codenamed Low Light grunted.

"Oh, Low Light! You're such a pessimist!" The brown-haired former model and Joe tank driver codenamed Cover Girl rolled her eyes with a smile.

"I agree with Cover Girl." The bald wheelchair-bound telepath named Charles Xavier agreed. "So far, it seems to be fine."

"Only because we're channeling their destructive tendencies toward destroying something besides each other." The Canadian feral mutant codenamed Wolverine grunted. The four were sitting in the Danger Room's control room, watching the X-Men and the original Misfit crew were having a cooperative session in the Danger Room.

"Yo, Red Dragon! Special Delivery!" The Brazilian mutant Roberto "Sunspot" Da Costa called out. He was in his super-strong black sunspot form, and he pitched a robot in the air.

"Let's make some art, Sunspot!" Jake "Red Dragon" Wildfire smirked. The flying red-haired Bostonian mutant swooped down on the robot and started breathing flame on it, melting it into a wall. "And that's another one eliminated from the match!"

"Ha!" Althea "Wavedancer" Delgado crowed cockily. The black-haired hydrokinetic swatted away a couple of floating saw blade-packing drones. "Oh yeah! I rule!"

"Oh, don't be such a show-off!" Jean Grey groaned. The red-haired telekinetic telepath used her telekinetic powers to smash together two robots.

"Alright, people! Let's stay organized here!" Scott "Cyclops" Summers ordered. The optic blasters used his powers to shoot down a couple flying robots.

"Screw that! Let's just rock!" Lance "Avalanche" Alvers snapped, creating an earthquake that toppled a couple robots over. "Oh yeah! Who the man!"

"Yikes!" Amara "Magma" Aquilla yelped. The Nova Roman princess was in her Magma form, throwing fiery balls of lava at a couple jet-like robots, but she was under heavy laser fire. She was rescued by a purple laser that flew out of nowhere and shot them down. She turned and saw her rescuer: A boy with long feathered black hair, dressed in a purple-and-black uniform with a purple leather jacket and a silver star on his chest. His right eye glowed purple, an eye that was surrounded by a purple 5-pointed star birthmark.

"As Elvis would say, I was just takin' care of business." Paul "Starchild" Starr grinned. The LA-born laser-firing mutant flashed a grin, a wink, and a thumbs up. Magma blushed and giggled. Paul blasted a robot that was about to ambush Scott.

"I could've taken care of that robot myself, Paul." Scott grunted.

"You didn't see it coming, Scott." Paul explained calmly.

"I don't need help from some woman-stealing Starchild." Scott grumbled.

"Oh leave him alone, Scott." Amara piped up. "Paul wouldn't be so mean! He was only helping."

"Yah!" The super-strong Southern-born power-absorbing mutant powerhouse known only as Rogue flew through a couple helicopter-like robots. The rubble fell down to the ground. Someone looked up.

"Yawn…" Pietro "Quicksilver" Maximoff mock yawned in a melodramatic manner. The arrogant silver-haired speedster started running around at superhuman speed in a circle. It caused an updraft which slowed down the falling pieces, allowing them to land on the ground gently. The speedster slowed to a stop. "That was easy!" he smirked cockily, buffing his nails on his uniform and admiring them. A stray piece of metal conked him on the head, knocking him on the butt. "OW!"

"RRRAAAAARGH!" Craig "Darkstar" Starr, Paul's identical twin brother, only with a black star birthmark over his right eye, lunged at a couple robots. "COME ON!" He blasted one in the head with his laser while pounding the other one with an adamantium-lined black nightstick.

"Are you sure he's not related to Wolverine?" Tabitha "Boom-Boom" Smith asked Jesse "Bedlam" Aaronson. The African-American mutant nodded, but the shook his head.

"I don't know." He admitted.

"Wow. You got to admit. There's a lot of improvement here." Cover Girl grinned.

"Yes." Xavier smiled. "I think that there may be hope for them getting along after all."

"Dos vedanya!" Piotr "Colossus" Rasputin crowed. He was in his metal form, which gave him immense strength and durability. He was holding a robot over his head, which he pitched into another robot, knocking them both backwards. The robots them got welded together into a solid piece by St. John "Pyro" Allerdyce.

"BWAAAA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The insane Australian pyrokinetic cackled. "Let's see 'em do the funky chicken now! That'll teach these things to think that they can wear tights!"

"You get stranger every time I meet you. Do you know that?" Piotr commented to John. The blond Australian laughed.

"You talk like being crazy is a bad thing, mate! You should try it! It's a lot of fun, mate!"

"Great work, guys!" Kitty "Shadowcat" Pryde complimented as she passed through another robot, shorting it out in the process.

"Thank you, Katya." Piotr smiled.

"No worries, Sheila." Pyro grinned.

"Pfft!" Lance snorted cockily, crossing his arms. "The metal musclehead over there may be able to bust open tanks with his fists, but he lacks the rock 'n' roll style. Panache. Finesse. Like this." The earth-mover smirked as he created a bump in the ground. The speed of the bump popping up caused the robot to fly into the air, and crash into several flying drones, and landing on another robot. "Heh." Piotr scowled.

"Personally Avalanche, I prefer the simple approach." The large metal-skinned Russian grunted.

"Why? Too dumb to do it any other way?" Lance snickered.

"Lance!" Kitty hissed.

"Let's see you take this 'with style'!" Piotr snapped. He grabbed a robot and pitched it at Lance. The smirking geokinetic simply ducked and the robot flew over him.

"Didn't even take a hair out of place, as Pietro would say. A+ for Effort." Lance smirked.

"Huh?" Scott turned around to see a flying robot barrel towards him. "What the-!"

CRASH!

"SCOTT!" Jean exclaimed.

"I'm okay…" Scott's whimpers could be heard from under the busted robot. "Has anyone seen my face? I think it fell off…Hey…I found Jello…"

"What happened?" Jean yelled.

"I really want to curl up and dies right now." Piotr de-armored and tried to make himself look small.

"Wow." Lance quipped, starting to clap and snickered. "I'm impressed, Colossus." He turned to Piotr. "You got a better eye than I thought. You nailed Summers at 500 feet. You ever thought about going into sniping?"

"Lance, stop." Kitty groaned.

"Is he alright?" Cover Girl and the others raced down inside the Danger Room.

"Hang on, folks! I got this!" Jake transformed into his Dragon Mode, and lifted the wrecked robot off Scott. "We'd better get Lifeline and Dragonfly in here."

"Puff, the magic dragon…" Scott mumbled.

"Who did this?" Jean wondered.

"Petey's gonna get it, Petey's gonna get it…" Lance sang. "Man, you gonna get a telepathic beating from Red over there."

"Oh, no…" Piotr moaned.

"Lance!" Kitty hissed.

"Now's not the time, man." Paul shook his head, putting a hand on Lance's shoulder.

"He's still alive, if that's any help." Jake offered. "A little scrambled in the head, but alive."

"Pretty dragon…"

"Okay, can somebody with an ounce of medical training come over here and look at Scott? He's starting to worry me here." Jake groaned.

Well, well, well! Looks like another disaster has occurred. What insanity will happen next? Will Scott be alright? What'll happen to him in the infirmary? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!