AUTHOR: Lady Addiction

FANDOM: Hikaru no Go/Naruto

PAIRING: None

RATING: PG-13

WARNINGS: GEN-ish, pointless fluff, OOC?

DISCLAIMER: Naruto is the popular brainchild of Kishimoto Masashi. Hikaru no Go is the result of spectacular collaboration between Obata Takeshi and Hotta Yumi. Me, I borrow their characters and their worlds and dream someday I'll be able to create something as good.

SUMMARY: It's that time of month again. Touya is not pleased.

NOTES:

1. Heh, there is no Mitsubishi Dragon Cup that I know of, but some Go tournaments I know are corporately-sponsored so I took poetic licence.

2. Erk, I love reading Naruto fanfic, but I've never tried writing one so I'm a little sketchy on characterizations. My humble apologies.

3. Okay, I've never been to Japan so I really have no experience about the ramen competitions. However, I have heard that they do occur in some restaurants.

4. If I'm not mistaken, naruto is actually the name of the pink-and-white swirly fishcake you often see in ramen.

WWWW

Touya Akira began impatiently drumming his fingers on the table, valiantly trying to suppress a tired yawn. It had been a long week for him, starting with two consecutive matches for both the Meijin second-preliminary and the Mitsubishi Dragon Cup semi-final matches in Okinawa and Nagasaki respectively, and ending that day with a troublesome Go lesson for one of his more talented but belligerent students. As exhausted mentally and physically as he was, Touya had every intention of relaxing via a stimulating game with Shindou Hikaru.

And now Shindou was late.

Touya checked his watch. Shindou was usually a quarter or even a half-hour late, but Touya had been waiting for over an hour already. The young pro growled under his breath, vowing to strangle the other boy the minute he saw him.

Finally, twenty minutes later, Touya left the salon in a terrible mood. The beginning of an annoying headache was coming upon him, and his clothes clung stickily to him from the intense heat of the late summer day. All he really wanted to do was to head home and jump into the bath. He will deal with Shindou tomorrow, when he had a great deal more energy.

He was immersed in the steaming hot tub when the penny dropped, and he suddenly remembered exactly what day it was. He sighed deeply and sunk down to his nose in the water.

Today was the Great Ramen Day.

Of course, how could he have forgotten?

WWWW

Sure enough, in a district an hour's car ride away, the object of Touya's ruminations was busily slurping up a truly gigantic bowl of flavoured noodles. Narrow green eyes glared challengingly into bright-blue ones from across a long table. All around them, the small, dingy restaurant was filled with regular patrons, laughingly cheering on the stubborn finalists for the World Bowl Eating Competition. In the tables right beside them were the other four defeated contestants, groaning weakly after the onslaught of several "world-sized" bowls of ramen.

In perfect unison, the two slurped up the last of the noodles, tipped up the enormous bowls, and greedily drank down the broth. They finished exactly at the same time, each wiping their faces with the sleeves of neon-orange shirts loudly proclaiming: Ramen Buddies (front), Give Me Ramen NOW! (back).

Suddenly, the restaurant hushed as the owner went close, carefully studying both bowls. Both finalists' eyes followed his and they all saw the exact same thing: one half-chewed pink-and-white fishcake left in Uzumaki Naruto's bowl. A tanned hand shot out to pick it up, but he was too late.

"NO!" The blond loudly pounded on the table, while Shindou got up and theatrically bowed to the audience, his face split in a wide grin.

"Congratulations," the owner proclaimed, handing him a large coupon for five free ramen with solemn dignity. Shindou took the coupon with exuberant thanks, and then went to rub it in his ramen buddy's face.

"Damn it! I should have won!" The blond complained petulantly, crossing his hands on his chest and glowering at Shindou's smug face. "You didn't put that naruto there, did you?" He questioned suspiciously.

"Hah! You were the one that did that last month, remember! I never touched your bowl," Shindou refuted self-righteously. "This just proves that I'm better than you!"

"Oh yeah! Well, this is not over yet! I saw that bar down the street having another ramen competition! I'll show you who's better!" The two of them sped out of the restaurant, leaving a gawking crowd behind them.

WWWW

Touya was lazily reading the evening paper when his cell phone rang. He rolled his eyes, already anticipating what this call would be about. Sure enough, there was Shindou's weak, raspy voice. "Touya, help," the bane of his existence whined pathetically.

"Shindou, I don't know why you insist on bloating yourself up and then making me come over to pick you up," the other pro told his friend tartly. "Do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to have to help somebody out of a ramen stand! Why can't you go on a drinking binge like any normal Japanese person!"

"Touya"

"Fine. Where are you?"

Forty minutes later, Touya was pulling up his dark-blue sedan close to a busy main street five districts away. He soon found the ramen bar Shindou mentioned, and there was his errant friend. Cheeks flushed, eyes heavy, his stomach distended beyond belief under his eye-scorching orange shirt, Shindou was lolling about at one of the shadowed booths. Right across from him was a blond in similar circumstances.

"Idiots."

At the sound of that familiar, deep voice, Touya turned around. There was Uchiha Sasuke, pristine in his black jeans and shirt. The other boy nodded to Touya. "Both of them are," the Go pro agreed dryly. "I don't know why they do this to themselves. Especially Shindou. It's not as if he never eats ramen. He has it every other day!"

"Naruto's worse," replied Sasuke as the two of them approached the groaning duo. "The only time he eats anything other than ramen is when somebody drags him off to a barbeque or an oden stand."

They stopped in front of the booth and eyed their respective friends with twin expressions of complete exasperation. Naruto was the first to notice them. "Sasuke" he bleated loudly, "my belly hurts."

"Idiot!" Sasuke whapped him on the head, before pulling the blond up gently. "Of course it would hurt! You haven't been doing anything but running around eating giant bowls of ramen all day!"

"But, but see, I won two of the contests!" The blond grinned lazily and waved a fistful of free ramen coupons and one small trophy. "Now I can have free ramen!"

"Idiot!" Sasuke whapped him on the head again, this time less gently. One hand on his aching crown, the other on his bloated stomach, the other youth resembled a squinty-eyed, pouty-lipped monkey.

On the other side of the booth, Touya was busy helping his own charge up. Unlike Sasuke who wasn't shy of showing his frustration physically, the Go pro preferred to let loose with a vicious tongue-lashing that had Shindou whimpering in mercy. The two miscreants exchanged longsuffering looks across the wooden table as abuse continued to rain upon their heads until they were by their companions' respective vehicles.

"Well, I can't really say it was nice seeing you again, Uchiha-san, not when it means Shindou's like this," Touya said, after finally managing to have the other pro safely secured in the passenger seat. Shindou was already snoring lightly. "I think the worst day of my life was when these two found each other," he added, eyeing the deceivingly angelic-looking young man in his car.

"Likewise," Sasuke returned, frustration lacing his usually cool voice. He was still unfortunately wrestling Naruto into the passenger seat of his low-slung midnight-blue sportscar. "We have to go. We have a long day tomorrow and the earlier this idiot gets to bed, the better."

"Alright, take care, Uchiha-san." Touya slipped into his own car and started the engine.

"Until next month." They shared commiserating glances, until Touya backed out and slipped into the traffic.

"Shindou, really." He shook his head. "The gods must have been laughing the moment you and Uzumaki-san met."

-FIN-

This was mainly because I noticed that readers liked my Hikago fics, so I just wanted to show my appreciation! I hope that y'all liked it!

Please comment! Without reviews, it feels too often as if I'm writing to a black hole. From now on, I'll try to respond to reviews in my fic journal (see my bio for the link).