Why, you ask, did I choose this waaay too common, title? Well, I recently became obsessed with the best Sailormoon music video (ever) about Usagi and Mamoru that threw in a little PGSM. And guess what the title was. I couldn't not call this "Memory". So if you ever find a music video with the acoustic version of that Sugercult song then download it. The lyrics fit this story perfectly even though I didn't write this with them in mind. The idea for this story has been brewing in my head for a long time now.
(PGSM is the live action sailormoon tv show, pretty guardian sailormoon)
Memory
by moonangel
Chapter 1
Chiba Mamoru opened his eyes as a light breeze blew past the fluttering curtains adorning the window above his bed. Even before light hit his eyes he knew he wasn't in his bedroom. A hospital. He recognized the stale smell, the cold atmosphere, the faint sounds of nurses and doctors shuffling through the barren corridors. He always seemed to end up in this awful place. It was ironic that he should wake up here yet again with that now familiar feeling that he was forgetting something. At least he was doing better than the last time. He remembered his name, where he lived, what he did for a living. He remembered his friends, the few that he had, and his daily schedule. But he had no idea how he had ended up in a hospital and for some reason he couldn't recall what his last memory was. As he stared at the ceiling, a faint whisper of a curious secret sounded in the back of his mind, a very important secret. It felt like the answers were right there in front of him but when he tried to grab hold of them they danced away, just a breath away from his reach. A part of him was screaming for something, begging him to remember. But remember what? What had he forgotten? He shut his eyes in frustration and suddenly soft laughter and a flash of golden hair flitted across his mind. His eyes flew open.
Who is she?
Good question. Slowly, he focused his gaze on his surroundings, hoping to find some kind of clue. He wasn't the least bit surprised to find the room empty. No cards or flowers, no signs of the comings and goings of any visitors. Friendship was never something he was very good at. Yet somehow he didn't care. Somehow nothing mattered if he couldn't find... find what?
Find her.
His heart ached. Sitting up, he clutched his chest. The sheets shifted and a clatter interrupted his thoughts. Realizing that something had fallen from the bed covers, he glanced down in mild curiosity. In the soft rays of sunlight, a delicate, star-shaped locket winked at him from the dusty linoleum floor.
And then he remembered.
-----
"You're here."
"No kidding."
"You remember, don't you?"
"Big surprise. I think it's safe to say we all do dumbass."
Hino Rei growled at her annoying friend. An embarrassed Mizuno Ami and two annoyed cats watched on as Kino Makoto struggled to keep the fiery haired priestess from strangling the smirking blonde.
The black cat, Luna, sighed. This wasn't exactly the heartfelt reunion she had been hoping for. Maybe the girls were still in shock. It certainly didn't feel like the horrifying events of the previous day had fully registered in her own mind. That morning she had awoken to find herself lying next to Artemis on foot of the Hikawa Shrine steps. They had been confused and disoriented at first. But with a clear memory of the previous day's events the two cats had hurried up the stairs, surprised to find the raven haired miko they had been searching for standing at the top of the steps. The somber girl barely acknowledged their presence and as she stood there, taking in the sunrise as if for the first time.
Luna had no idea how long they'd just sat there, all three staring at the world with a newfound appreciation for it. It felt like ages before any of them spoke. She'd wanted so badly to ask the miko what she was thinking but she didn't have the heart to ruin the moment. Not that it would have mattered. A loud crash had disturbed the peacefulness of the morning. The trio had turned towards the steps to watch as two worried girls hovered over a whining blond who had taken a tumble in the middle of trudging up the stairs to the temple. The brunette was laughing as she and her petite, blue-haired friend helped the blonde up from her awkward position on the steps. The blonde blushed before bursting into giggles and the brunette laughed harder as they continued their trek up to the temple. Even their shy companion was smiling. They seemed so animated that no one would have guessed that they'd spent the previous day fighting for their lives... and losing. While watching the girls, Rei had smiled the first gentle smile that Luna had ever seen touch her lips. There was a hint of sadness in it but still, it was good to have her girls back.
"You baka! Stop being such a brat and start acting happy to see me!"
"I'd be happier if you didn't live at the top of ten gazillion stairs!"
"I'm sorry, I should just pack up and leave the only home I've ever known just to please your lazy ass!"
Well, it was almost good to have her girls back.
Unfortunately, the girls didn't seem to be thinking along the same lines as her. Makoto had already settled down to watch, scarfing down a bag of popcorn that seemed to pop out of nowhere, occasionally tossing in her own jabs. Even Ami looked like she was enjoying the endless argument between the two girls. It was an amusing sight but somehow the picture felt wrong. Somehow Luna felt a twinge of disappointment interfere with the happiness she was feeling. Listening to the girls bicker, Luna couldn't help wondering why she wasn't sobbing with joy. The very sight of them should at the very least bring tears to her eyes.
Yesterday these very same girls had died to save the world. Now here they were, alive and well with no future battles to worry about. The world was safe and they were free with their whole lives ahead of them. It was wonderful.
But something felt wrong.
"Luna," Ami asked, poking the cat hesitantly.
Trying to focus her attention on the girl, Luna gave her an encouraging smile, answering, "Yes?"
"Where's Usagi-chan?"
-----
Furuhata Motoki whistled happily as he scrubbed the dirty counter before him, glancing at the clock. It was 10:30. Good. He was halfway through his morning shift at the Crown Arcade and he was more or less finished with all his morning chores. Today was such a beautiful day. Birds were singing, the sun was shining and oh look, those two preteens in the back booth were making out like there was no tomorrow. See? Everyone was so happy. What a wonderful day. Motoki was always a cheerful guy but somehow today felt, well, wonderful. Yesterday the raging storm had been like nothing he had ever seen. Embarrassing as it was, he'd been so afraid that he was convinced that he was going to die.
Not that he would admit that out loud. He was a man after all. A big, strong, healthy man.
Well, healthy anyways.
Er, where was he? Oh yeah, big storm, impending doom. But suddenly a light had shown through and it was like he just knew that everything would be okay, that he could stop squeezing the stuffing out of his stuffed turtle and maybe even start breathing like a normal person again.
So today he actually felt inspired to do something. Maybe he'd do something new and adventurous like learn to ride a motorcycle or sky dive. Or buy a pet. Maybe a fish. No, a turtle! That'd be cool.
Yep, today was a good day.
Motoki turned to clean the next counter and a flash of golden hair caught his eye. He glanced towards the window to see what it was.
He laughed. Looked like his favorite customer was actually up before noon.
-----
Three girls stopped mid-argument and turned to stare at their blue haired friend, Rei slowly releasing Minako's lapels, having just finished shaking the blonde silly.
Rei winced but with a careless wave her hand, she turned away from her friends' curious gazes, muttering, "Probably slept in. No lightning flash of a lifetime worth of memories is going to wake that ditz."
"Rei-chan, that's not a very nice thing to say," Ami replied, frowning.
"Yeah, I mean she did save the world. This is a well-deserved break. Let's let her rest for today. If she comes, she comes," Makoto added.
Minako nodded enthusiastically, "Yeah, totally! The poor thing had to do all the work. Since we were dead and all I think we got enough rest to last a lifetime. It's not exactly hard work lying around and rotting."
The cats cringed and Makoto nudged the blonde. Minako turned to stare at her for a few seconds then her eyes widened and her mouth formed an "o".
"Ooooh, yeah. Sorry about the dying part. I know you guys probably didn't take that very well," a nervous Minako rambled. Noting her companions wincing at her words, her eyes softened and she continued in a slightly gentler voice, "I didn't mean to leave you guys. None of us did. And hey, we're all ok now! It seriously feels like just another fun-filled meeting at the ol' run-down temple."
"Run-down?" Rei growled. "I'll show you-"
Ignoring the angry miko, Minako impulsively grabbed her friends into a huge bear hug and repeated, "We're all ok. We saved the world and our duty is done. We're free to live nice, normal, happy lives and I swear, nothing's going to stop us from enjoying them!"
Ami and Makoto nodded, returning her hug with enthusiasm, the blue haired genius wiping a lone tear from her watery eyes. The cats perched on the girls' shoulders, smiling.
"Normal..." Rei echoed, staring off into space.
Luna frowned.
-----
After much joyful gossiping and tearful reminiscing, the cats shooed Ami, Makoto and Minako out of the temple, claiming that they wanted to rest and that Rei was starting to look worn out. The girls accepted their excuse and left with smiles on their faces and promises of returning as much as they could in the next few days. They knew that there was something the others weren't saying but they had faith that they would find out eventually. They had all the time in the world.
After glancing fondly at the retreating figures, Luna exchanged a glance with Artemis then turned to Rei, her smile fading.
"You know."
Rei flinched, turning to gaze at her sadly.
"Yeah. Lucky me. Stupid sixth sense never seems to bring me any good news. I figured you guys did, too, from your expressions earlier. Must be an all-knowing imperial cat thing, right? The other girls are obviously in the dark about it but they'll have to find out sooner or later. This isn't exactly something we can hide from them. I wouldn't be surprised if they already have their suspicions. They probably won't take it well but honestly, they're not the ones I'm worried about."
Luna blinked. "Their best friend forgets them and you think they'll just be fine with that?"
Artemis chimed in, "Well, they seem to be pretty upbeat. Instead of concentrating on their deaths they're celebrating their fresh starts. I say things are going great."
Luna whacked him and Rei sighed.
He gave them a dumbfounded look. "What?"
Speaking slowly, Rei gritted out, "Usagi doesn't remember. Not a thing. She thinks the past few months never happened. This is not a good thing."
Still looking confused, Artemis asked, "But why? You heard her last wish, right? She told the ginzuishou she wanted a normal life. Now she has one so she should be happy. You guys can befriend her again and things'll be great."
The two females exchanged glances, wondering why his idiotic statement seemed to make sense. Uncharacteristically, Luna rolled her eyes and said, "You're missing some of the larger issues here."
Rei opened her mouth to add in her own annoyed comments but paused, a soft smile forming, "But maybe he has have a point. Usagi's current state certainly complicates matters but I do think that in the end things will be okay between us. Our friendship has always been strong."
"You're still worried about that but that's not what's bothering you the most, is it?" Luna asked, perceptively.
Rei shook her head. "No, it's not. It's depressing thinking that she may never remember us in that way. We went through so much together. Everything that brought us together, made us a family, is gone and she may never get those memories back. I'm as sad for her as I am for us. I don't know how I'll break the news to the other girls but I think they're not the ones that will take it the hardest. It's not them that we should be worrying about, it's..."
Finally, Luna caught on to the real issue.
"The Prince."
-----
Tsukino Usagi groaned as she stared at the mile-long list of chores she held in her tired hand. This morning she'd woken up with the weirdest feeling that she couldn't place for the life of her and for the first time ever she was actually attempting to think deep thoughts. Her mother should have been proud. But nooo, instead she'd dumped a huge to-do-list on her poor, suffering daughter's shoulders and tossed her out the door.
Life was so hard on her.
It was hours later and she still hadn't gotten even halfway through the list. Ok, so maybe she'd dawdled in the arcade a little too long but Motoki had been in such a good mood, offering her a free milkshake and everything! Now who on earth would turn that down? Unfortunately, he had turned all brotherly and responsible on her and had shooed her off to finish her chores. Now half a dozen bags of groceries hung from her weary arms and she swore not a single one of them was worth even the teeniest bit of effort. Seriously, who used flour anyways? Not normal people! Baking was overrated. On top of that, all day she had felt a stupid pain in her chest that just totally refused to go away. What the heck was with that? She certainly didn't remember ever feeling that before!
"Stupid flour, stupid Mom, stupid pain in my dang a– ow!"
Rubbing her soar posterior, Usagi glanced up at the brick wall that had so rudely knocked her off her feet.
She blinked.
Wow. That was a very, very good looking wall.
Her "wall" turned out to be the handsomest man she'd ever laid eyes on. Was he real? Was "handsomest" a word? Should she be wasting her time thinking about that when a greek god look-alike was staring down at her like she was the only woman in the world? Probably not.
Completely oblivious to the scattered shopping bags surrounding her, Usagi stuttered, "Uh, sorry, mister... um, sir. I guess I just, you know, have this annoying habit of running into walls and hey look, you're not a wall! That's just funny, hilarious even cuz you know, people aren't walls cuz walls are walls and people can't be walls if walls are walls and didn't I just say that and oh my god, am I rambling?"
She shivered. Why was he staring at her like that?
"Uh, sir?"
Blinking, he snapped out of a daze. He opened his mouth as if to say something but stopped and just shook his head. Averting his gaze, he quickly bent down, gathering her bags without saying a word.
Ok, why wasn't he talking? Shouldn't he say something? Usagi could only sit there watching him, random thoughts and questions flying through her mind at a dizzying pace. For some reason she couldn't seem to gather her thoughts together even though she knew she was openly staring at the man while he was hurriedly collecting her things.
She frowned.
Why were his hands shaking?
Before she could ponder over that thought, she found him kneeling before her, pushing the bags into her lifeless arms, his eyes averted. She nearly squeaked at his sudden nearness and instinctively, she clutched the bags to her, her gaze never leaving his face. He looked up at her and her breath caught. His eyes... they were so blue. It hurt to look at them. The pain in her chest grew stronger yet it felt almost exhilarating. She had no idea how long they sat there, just staring at each other. There were so many emotions in his eyes and for a second all she wanted was to take away the deep sadness that was emanating from him in waves. Her mouth opened and a name formed in the back of her mind. Unconsciously, her hand rose, reaching towards him. She took in a sharp breath as the pads of her fingers lightly touched his ashen face.
Suddenly his eyes widened and he stood abruptly. Running a shaky hand through his raven locks he glanced up at her before quickly looking away. He turned back towards the direction he'd originally been heading and took a few awkward steps forward. As he reached the corner he tossed her one last fleeting look.
"Sorry."
And he was gone.
For a second she just stared at the space where he stood moments ago. That was... weird. 'Don't turn that corner, Usagi, you just came from there,' she told herself. 'Don't follow him. You have chores to do. Busy day.'
Blink.
Chores! Oops.
Clutching her bags, she clumsily stood up, dropping a few items in the process. She shakily grabbed them, stuffing random items half-hazardly back into the bags, unable to wake from her daze. When she finished she just stood there, staring at that empty spot in front of her again.
Who was that man?
-----
"Usagi, I specifically told you to buy potatoes. Tomatoes are not potatoes. They sound the same but I sincerely doubt that, even with your appetite, you'd want to eat mashed tomatoes with gravy."
"Uh huh."
"And this is the wrong milk, too! Kami-sama, Usagi! You messed up almost half of the list I gave you! Did you just give up halfway? And didn't I tell you to get daisies? These are roses! Not only do roses in general cost ten times more but red roses are the most expensive and - Usagi, are you listening to me?"
"Uh huh."
"Should I throw you out of the house and turn your room into a golf course?"
"Uh huh."
"Do you have any idea how little sense that makes?"
"Uh huh."
"Usagi!"
A confused Usagi blankly looked up at her mother, her eyes glassy. Tsukino Ikuko sighed. Clearly she wasn't going to get anywhere with her daughter. With a resigned grimace she told her daughter, "Why don't you go upstairs. You look tired."
Usagi nodded dumbly and left the room in a daze. What on earth had happened to that girl? Letting out another sigh, Ikuko went about putting the groceries away.
--- to be continued ---
I'm not completely sure about where I'm going with this yet. Any suggestions? Any critiques? Any kind of advice would be much appreciated!
Important: I didn't explain this earlier because it'd kill the beginning but this is a first season story that takes place the day after the girls defeat Beryl. It's only stated in the original (japanese) version, but when she died Usagi wished for a normal life. The crystal granted that with so everyone lost their memories and started over. In this story everyone got what they wanted, meaning that only those who wanted to remember would remember.
AN: So, did you assume that the blonde in the beginning was Usagi? I worried that some people wouldn't be able to follow the story so tell me if it's too confusing! After watching PGSM I'm kind of used to Rei bickering with Minako instead of Usagi. I didn't realize at first that it appeared as if blonde in the group was Usagi. I did want Usagi's present state to be unclear so maybe I did that unconsciously. This is an anime-based story so the Rei/Minako dynamic (and maybe Motoki) may be the most PGSM influenced bit. Minako is a bit of a mix of her manga, anime and PGSM selves. I found myself making her the cheerful substitute Usagi for the group because they kind of need her right now. I wanted them to have positive attitudes about their "deaths".
I had Luna to call Mamoru "the Prince" because it's really as impersonal as it is respectful. She doesn't know him well and never trusted him until his identity was revealed. Usagi was the one that interacted with him most of the time. The title also puts some weight on his shoulders. He's the prince of earth. The fighting may be over but that means something. And he's a prince without his princess.