A "Boring" Day

By

Dragondolphin1990

Very little was happening on Setzer's airship. It was just another boring day.Locke, Terra, Setzer, and Edgar were off trying to save the world, or something of the sort. Celes, Cyan, Gau, Relm, Sabin, Shadow, and Strago were playing a game of poker, though Gau kept trying to eat the cards. Mog and Umaro were trying to fly the airship, and Gogo was yelling at them. Cyan, having won another hand, decided to call in quits. He took his winnings (enough to buy a new sword) and told Gogo to quiet down.

Relm pulled on Strago's sleeve, "Grampa, I'm hungry."

"I'm busy, Relm, go draw something to eat."

"But--"

"No, buts, Relm. Go away."

Relm, not having any paper, drew on Shadow's cloak. His eye twitched, but he refrained from killing her that instant. A few minutes later, Relm had a lovely picture of some rice balls, orange juice, and a p, b, and j (no crust). The food popped to life, leaving holes in Shadow's cloak. Relm ate most of it, and offered the leftover riceballs to Sabin and Celes. Celes took one to humor Relm, but she quickly used a spell to destroy it (she doesn't like crayon-flavored food). Sabin stared at the riceball, "I… I don't know what to do with this…"

"You eat it, silly."

"Eat…?"

Relm stuck her tongue out at him and pranced off. Shadow, meanwhile, stalked off to find Strago, "Relm destroyed by cloak. Strago, I insist that you buy me a new cloak because she is your child."

"No, she isn't, she's yours."

"… Shut up, old man."

"I'm sure you have more clothes."

"No, I do not. All I have are these disco shoes that I got in the eighties."

"Final Fantasy Three/Six wasn't even out then."

"What is this Final Fantasy you speak of?"

"Oh, yeah, I forgot. You aren't magical, and therefore you do not have a way to know that we are just a video game."

"Crazy loon," Shadow said while walking away.

In the cockpit, Mog still had no luck at flying the airship. Umaro got bored with it a while ago and started yelling at Gogo.

"Uwwaaah!"

"Shut up!"

"Gaaaaaah!"

"Be quiet!"

"Raaaaah!"

"I have no clue what you are attempting to express. I don't speak gibberish!"

Mog rolled his eyes, "It isn't gibberish. He is saying that he wants you to go wear Shadow's disco shoes."

"You mean those high heeled man shoes?"

"Yup."

"Wow… I didn't know that Shadow had any of those."

"Uwwaaah!"

"Translation, please."

"He says to do the chicken dance in them."

"No way!"

"Gaaaaaah!"

"Now what?"

"He'll kill you if you don't."

"I have a Phoenix Down!"

"Raaaaah!"

" 'And who's going to use it on you?' "

Gogo stalked off to get Shadow's shoes, grumbling about Yetis.

Meanwhile, Relm took a nap. Everyone was happy that she took a nap because she was too young to be saving the world, anyway. Well, Gau didn't, but he's too stupid to realize those kinds of things.

Back to Gogo. It was looking for Shadow, who was nowhere to be found.

What is Gogo, anyway? Is it a he or a she? Or maybe it's a Michael Jackson, neither male nor female. Yes, Gogo is a Michael Jackson. That reminds me of a funny story, but I don't have time to tell it, but I will tell you that it involves Strago, Celes, alcohol, and a Michael Jackson CD. Now, those were good times…

Gogo finally found Shadow. He was in his room attempting to sew up his cloak. Shadow glared at Gogo, "What do you want?"

Gogo backed off a little when Shadow withdrew a throwing star, "I, uh, well, you see, Mog is threatening me if I don't wear your disco shoes."

"You can take Mog on, you don't need my shoes (how'd you know about them anyway?) It's not like he can dance; it'd ruin the ship and Setzer would kill us all."

"Well… Umaro is siding with Mog."

"Oh…"

"Please just lend me the shoes!"

"You have to do something for me."

"What? Anything!"

"Get me Relm's painting equipment."

"Alright. Just wait until she wakes up."

"See you then."

So, Gogo went off to Relm's room. He waited outside of it until she awoke from her nap.

While Gogo was waiting, Cyan was helping Sabin with his sword technique. Sabin continually complained that it was stupid and he didn't need to learn to wield a sword.

"But, thou, Sabin, my comrade. A truly amazing damsel loves a man properly using the majestic sword. Thou wouldst greatly improve thy chances of earning the lady's hand if thou fought with thy sword."

"What the…"

"Use a sword and you get the girl, dummy."

"Can't you just say that without the thou's in the first place?"

"Thou art attempting to change the subject."

"What are you talking about? Damsels?"

"Thou canst wow Celes in battle with they sword."

"Celes? She has Locke."

"Locke… He is what thou wouldst call a 'player'."

Sabin burst out laughing.

Cyan continued, "He has not only the fair maiden Terra, but also Rachel."

"Who?"

"The poor damsel with amnesia."

"Oh, yeah, her."

"Thou shouldst learn sword fighting."

"Alright."

Back in Relm's room, the little girl was waking up. She yawned, grabbed her paintbrush, and left to get some lunch. She quite literally ran into Gogo. It grabbed her on the shoulders, "Hey, Relm."

"Whadaya want?"

"I only need your paints and brush."

"Heck, no!"

"Please! If I don't get them to trade with Shadow then Umaro and Mog will kill me!"

"I guess you could have them, on one condition."

"What? Anything!"

"Kill grampa!"

"WHAT?"

"You heard me. Do it right now, or else you'll never getting my stuff."

"Alright. Let's go."

Gogo roamed the halls with Relm in tow until they found Strago. He was pacing near the entrance of the airship, waiting for the others to return. Gogo caught sight of him and instantly concentrated on Sabin, preparing to mimic him. A few seconds later, Gogo bumrushed Strago to death. Relm let out a long evil laugh. "Muahahahahahahahahahahaha, cough, cough, muahahahahahahahahahahaha!"

Gogo quickly got Relm's gear and headed to Sabin's room. Relm put on her cutest face and went off to force Cyan into making mac n cheese for the "cute young damsel".

Shadow quite willingly made the trade with Gogo. If Relm couldn't paint, she couldn't mess up his cloak anymore. Unfortunately, Shadow underestimated the power of scissors, but that tale is for another day.

Gogo made his way back to Umaro and Mog, "I got the shoes."

Umaro looked impatient. Gogo didn't notice that he was holding something behind his back. Mog said, "I think you should dance now."

Gogo put on the shoes, "Hey, I feel pretty tall…"

Mog barely held in his laughter at the sight of Gogo doing the chicken dance. Umaro quickly withdrew the old tomato he held behind his back and pelted Gogo with it, laughing madly. Gogo glared at the two and stalked off.

Shortly afterward, in another section of the airship, Sabin was being rejected by Celes, "I'm sorry, Sabin, I love… Cid!"

"The dude in a yellow overcoat?"

"He's my dude in a yellow overcoat!"

Like I said, not much was going on in Setzer's airship while Lock, Terra, Setzer, and Edgar were gone. When the four came back, Locke headed in first. He tripped over Strago's body and collided painfully with the wall. Terra ran to his side, "Locke are you okay?"

Setzer stepped over the body to head to the control room. Edgar groaned, "I guess it's up to me to revive you, old man."

He took out a Phoenix Down and brought Strago back to life. Strago vowed from then on that he would always be Edgar's humble servant, to which Edgar responded, "I am a king, I have plenty of servants, but thanks. You can go clean my room now!"

Setzer had finally made it up to he control room, where he discovered Mog, Umaro, and a smashed tomato. Slowly walking away, he said, "I'm not even going to ask…"