---Book of Paradise---
(Part 17)
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or Naruto.
SO SORRY! I nearly lost motivation for this story and I've been so busy. Wah!
I just have to say that the following torture dialogue is just a bunch of assorted ideas thrown together and clumsily sewn on. (Scratches head)
I would like to thank my friends for all your ideas, indirect, or not. Ideas either sprang from what you said, or I've used or altered the ideas you've given me.
"Yes, what do you think the outcome of this will be?"
"Something satisfying, I know it. The women in this village know well. They take whatever steps they need."
"They're so cunning, it scares me." Kagome watched as one lady ordered traffic around in the hot spring.
"Don't worry, Kagome. They mean well." Sango reassured her, "It'll turn out in the end. You can release your anger out of him after all this."
"But still…"
"It'll be just fine. Just you wait and see. Everybody else has to pretend they don't know anything if they see him though."
"That's true…and it begins now." Kagome watched as the first woman left the hot spring. "How long do you think this will take?"
"I'm guessing one or two days…maybe three."
"Three days? What are they doing?"
"Things."
Kagome looked at Sango peculiarly. After a while, she began to follow the first woman that left, curious to see how it would begin.
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Miroku exited Kaede's hut in high spirits. His novel was becoming a seller in the village. He cradled the many pictures of women he received, along with the cash.
Maybe he'd get more if he wrote another novel! 'Icha Icha Volume 5', he'd call it….
"Miroku-sama!" A lady walked up to him, blushing prettily, "Umm…Miroku-sama…"
Suddenly, she received his full attention, as he turned to face her with a charming grin on his face, "Why, miss, may I ask of your name? Whatever do you need?"
Her hands immediately came up to rest on his shoulders, her mouth right up against his left ear.
Miroku's face gained a somewhat read hue as his breath quickened. "This is too good to be true!"
"Miroku…you perverted monk." Her left hand held his shoulder in his place as her right hand reached around and promptly slapped him on the face. The lady made sure to kick him in the shins before stomping off.
The monk fell on to his knees, cradling his face, 'Not as hard as Sango…but winding.'
What was with that girl anyways? He hadn't done anything wrong that he knew of…Miroku started reviewing all the things he had done. "Nothing I did was wrong…" At least, nothing he could recall.
Apparently, he had said that out loud. Whoops.
"Hey…did what wrong? Are you okay?" Another lady waltzed up to him, but Miroku couldn't help but feel that there was something suspicious about this woman.
She spontaneously latched onto his arm, so suddenly, that it startled Miroku so bad, he didn't react for a few seconds.
"Miss…?"
"I'm so happy for you two!"
"…Excuse me!?" He gained a bewildered look of his face as he tried to jerk his arm away to no avail.
"I'm so thankful! Thank you so much for marrying my grandma! She's been so lonely these days, and she's been looking forward to having another husband around…" The lady sighed adoringly.
"Why…I wouldn't mind marrying—wait. Your grandmother!?"
She gained a devious smirk, "Yes, my grandmother, now come on; she wanted to give you a welcoming kiss." Slowly, the lady started dragging Miroku towards a house in the village.
Miroku panicked. 'I've got to get out of here, somehow!' Darting his head around, he spotted Kagome staring at him across the street. He outstretched his free arm towards her and opened his mouth in a silent scream.
Panic spread throughout Miroku's body as Kagome only raised an eyebrow and shrugged as he was dragged farther away from her.
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"I thank you guys so much…this young man was so polite to me…and I'm so happy that we'll get to be together for the rest of our lives, isn't that right, honey?" The elderly lady hugged him tighter and closer to her body.
Miroku looked like he was about to choke, sputtering occasionally.
"It was no problem, really. He was just so willing and I appreciate it." The still unknown lady smiled sweetly. "Anyway, I must really be getting on my way. Have a good life, yes?" She bowed, turning around and walking away. As soon as she was out of eyesight, she sprinted away, laughing.
The elderly lady turned back to Miroku. "Anyway, I'm in the mood for a bath. Would you like to join me?"
His eyes widened, and he started flailing so she would let go of him. "Erm…no thanks! I just remembered that I had some…work to do…bye!" He fled; if he had a tail, it would've been between his legs in fear.
As Miroku shot out of hearing distance, she giggled.
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"This village has gone insane" he muttered to himself. Miroku blindly ran – anywhere, as long as it was far from that insane lady.
"Ah!" He collided with somebody.
"I'm sorry! I wasn't watching where I was going" Miroku apologized.
"It's okay…I was in a hurry as well." He offered his hand to the lady that had fallen onto the ground, "Thank you…"
Miroku hoisted her up and she stumbled slightly before regaining her balance.
"I'd like to stay and chat because you seem like a sincere man, but I must get on my way." She patted him on the back and ran, turning into a nearby house.
"At least not everybody is crazy" He thought to himself.
Walking aimlessly through the village was his way of passing time, but…there was something different about this time. Miroku slowly began to notice that villagers were stopping to stare at him, and some were whispering to each other and giving him strange looks.
He decided to ignore this unusual activity until a little boy ran up and kicked him on the shin where a bruise was already forming from his earlier encounter with that unpleasant woman, "AGGH!" Miroku clenched his teeth and glared at the boy, who just stuck his tongue out and snickered.
What was wrong with everybody!?
Miroku rushed out into the forest, where he found a place to rest. He sighed irritably before he lay down on the soft grass, listening to the crinkling that---
---Wait. Crinkling?
He paused in suspicion. Miroku reached his hand over his shoulder to pat his back, and sure enough…he pulled a piece of paper off his back.
'KICK ME' The sign read.
Miroku stared at it for a full minute before crumpling it into a ball and winging it into the depths of the forest in fury.
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He neatly folded his robes and eased into the hot spring, sighing. Miroku had decided that only this could cure his throbbing bruises, but most of all, his wounded ego.
"Mmm," Miroku began humming a tune that he vaguely recalled Kagome sang a while back.
He suddenly heard a slight shuffling in the bushes, and he shot his head up, darting his head around to see if anybody was watching him – an enemy? A common villager come to spy on him? 'Is this how Kagome and Sango felt?'
But before he could ponder on it more, his head was thrust into the water and firmly held there by a hand.
Miroku struggled and flailed, water rushing up his nose and overwhelming him. He reached his hand to try and pry away the offending hand, but there was…nothing. He returned to the surface, gasping for air, and sputtering, coughing water out. Water splashed, and Miroku surveyed the clearing, but found nobody there.
Not only was nobody there, but…his clothes weren't to be seen either.
'Today- is a bad day.' He sulked.
I realize it took a while to get this out, but hey-it's out now, right? (Sniff) I think I won't say anything else now… If you have any questions, you can review or pm me. (Also, if you spot any mistakes...)
Please review if you can!
Tenshi-Battosai