"I don't know how to tell you this, mate, but you're a homicidal, insane teenager with magical powers that make Dumbledore jealous." - Seamus Finnigan.
Harry's Sanity
A Pointless Story in Four Parts
Part the Fourth – The Finale in Which No Conclusions of Any Kind are Actually ReachedThe Lead-Up to the End
A Little Back-Story – That is, We Skipped Several Hours...
Lunch had been incredibly tense. Hermione, Lavender and Parvati had spent the entire time eyeing the boys, while Seamus, and to a lesser extent Dean, Ron and Neville, had been eyeing Harry.
Harry, on the other hand, had been ignoring the fact that he was being watched from at least three parts of the room and had eaten his lunch as though he hadn't a care in the world. And by the time lunch was over and Seamus had somehow stolen a sugar quill from a first year and given it to him, perhaps he actually didn't have a care in the world.
But it was definitely tense.
Ron, of all people, had led them to the library after the meal was over, and they had made their way to the back of the shelves to the large yet secluded table that was hidden there.
None of the boys had known where to start.
Hermione had solved that problem for them. "All right, spill it. What the hell was going on this morning?"
Neville shrugged. "Harry's insane."
"Am not," Harry muttered petulantly.
Seamus gave him a sad look. "Harry...I don't know how to tell you this, mate, but you're a homicidal, insane teenager with magical powers that make Dumbledore jealous."
Harry responded with a bright grin. "Yes, I know."
Seamus rolled his eyes.
Dean just gestured to Harry while giving the girls a wry smile. "See, insane."
The conversation turned technical from there.
By the time the explanations were over, the girls were convinced, as well as supportive. Hermione, of course, wanted to get researching right away. But the three of them headed back to the Common Room first, sensing that the boys needed some time to get used to the girls knowing their biggest secret.
It was Ron who eventually broke the silence. "I think they took it well."
Harry snorted and threw the nearest book at him. "Moron. I think you are insane."
The Afternoon Eavesdropping
Masquerading as a stereotypical Ravenclaw, Lisa Turpin spent the majority of her free time in the Hogwarts library.
However, contrary to popular (and carefully cultured) belief, she did not spend that time studying. Well, mostly. She was a Ravenclaw, after all.
Lisa had found that the library was, amazingly enough, one of the biggest breeding grounds for gossip in the castle - not because people gossiped in there, which would have earned them death by Madame Pince, but because people never expected anyone to be listening to them in the library.
For some reason, the majority of the students either believed the library was the best place for these private discussions, or they just didn't expect to be overheard.
And we it not for Lisa's curious nature, they probably wouldn't have been.
Her aunt once said that stickybeaking was in their blood. Her older brother, Matthew, had refuted this, saying that it was reporting that was in their blood.
As the editor at the Daily Prophet, he was entitled to say this. And as his inside correspondent, she was fairly sure she was entitled to agree.
Of course, Lisa had never yet managed to hear anything worthy of being printed in the newspaper, which she was quite disappointed about.
It wasn't long before her luck changed.
Had Lisa arrived in the library and happened upon the conversation she did half an hour earlier, she would have had even more to relay back to Matt. Unfortunately for her, and somewhat fortunately for those involved, she did not.
However, she did arrive in time to hear another part of the discussion in question - and it was enough.
She was standing at a shelf near the back of the library, actually looking for a potions book she wanted to get out, when she began hearing the faint voices and moved closer.
Peering through the shelves, she saw the sixth year Gryffindor boys at the back table, and was somewhat surprised when Harry Potter threw a book at his best friend.
"Moron. I think you are insane."
Neville seemed highly amused. "Er, Harry? Pot. Kettle. Little bit o' name calling?"
Harry shrugged. "What can I say? I still think you're all insane. Mad as hatters."
Dean rolled his eyes. "Uh, no. Well, maybe a little. But Har, if we're as mad as hatters, you're madder than the hatter and his personal talking octopus."
"Well..."
"Oh face it, Harry," Ron sighed. "You know as well as we do that you're mentally unstable. Now let's get back to the Common Room before Hermione sends a search party. With straightjackets."
Harry nodded. "All right. But only because I don't want her setting up a date with a psychiatrist for me. Bleeding mental asylums are NOT where crazy people belong."
He gained four raised eyebrows and a thrown book from Seamus as the five of them stood up.
Lisa shifted further into the aisles as the boys left.
"Matthew's going to have a field day with this!" she whispered excitedly to herself, pulling out a sheet of parchment to write to her brother.
The Evening Letter
Matthew Turpin didn't actually have anything against Harry Potter, and hadn't been in control when Rita Skeeter had been writing for the Prophet.
But, as any idiot would know, the best sort of article is one that will catch the public's attention. And what does that better in the wizarding world than stories on the Boy-Who-Lived?
Nothing, that's what.
And that was why Matt had instructed his younger sister to take special notice of any reliable gossip regarding the boy - particularly anything that came from his friends or even himself.
It was just after dinner when he received the owl from Lisa.
'Dear Matty,
Oh my god, you'll never believe it! Harry Potter is insane!
Yeah yeah, I know what you're thinking. All that nonsense Rita wrote two years ago...but this is genuine.
Here, you recall that spell you taught me, how to transcribe past conversations onto parchment? I'll use that. You make your own conclusions. I'll do it on another sheet, though.
Have fun writing the article! I'll hope to see it tomorrow morning.
Love Lisa'
He wasn't sure whether he wanted to believe it or not, but read the transcript anyway.
And after that, he knew that it was irrefutable.
Harry Potter was, as Lisa claimed, insane.
And it was Matt's duty to tell the world.
The Beginning of the End
The Breakfast Arrival
To everyone's relief, Seamus had managed to get his hands on several chocolate frogs and a sugar quill, and Harry's 'medication ritual' went off without a hitch yet again.
The boys met up with the girls in the Common Room before heading down to breakfast together, Harry still sucking on his sugar quill.
And despite her best efforts and the knowledge that it was the main reason the school was still standing, Hermione couldn't help but frown in disapproval. Being the daughter of two dentists tends to instate a deep-seated belief that eating sweets before breakfast was Bad.
Thankfully, Harry temporarily abandoned it for his breakfast once they were seated, and she was able to put the thoughts out of her mind.
It seemed, to everyone in the room, that life at Hogwarts was back to, well, relative normality. And just about every person in the Great Hall who had known that anything was wrong in the first place gave a sigh of relief.
And then the post arrived.
The End, Until the Continuation in the Sequel…
Yes, I know. Lack of ending. And I also know its been more than a week or so since I posted the last chapter. Er, oops? Events conspired against me and thus I became busy. Oh well, it's up now.
Now, the sequel…you see, I got to that end with the post arriving and tried to go on, with reactions from all through the Great Hall. Sadly, I got stuck. Therefore, I decided to do the reactions in a sequel. And maybe, just maybe, add in a little plot to do with the whole Voldemort angle. But hey, who knows? Sadly I don't know when I'll write it, but I've sworn to a writing session tomorrow, so something should get updated soon.
VvvScreamvvV – Heh, glad you like. Yeah that IS mean, that concert sounds like it would have been fun.
Silver Sparklze – (Grins) Hey, I probably shouldn't have liked writing it nearly as much as I did. But I'm glad you enjoyed it. Sorry the update took a while.
elle – Glad you think so!
Raven2k5 – Thank you. Personally, I agree that it gets better, but this chapter…well. I know it isn't as good as previous ones.
Oh, and if you liked the way the last two chapters were written, I've got a oneshot called Hay Fever written in the same style. Just a little shameless self-advertising. Hee.
So anyway, do tell me what you thought of the chapter, the fic in general, er…you know, all that stuff.
Love to you all, and a belated Happy New Year!
S. Wolf