Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction: Implied Roy x Riza.

----------The Night Before Christmas: Fullmetal Alchemist Version----------

'Twas the night before Christmas,
when all through Central,
Not a homunculi was stirring,
not even a brigadier general.

The flame-retardant stockings were hung
by the office door with care,
In hopes that Santa Scar
soon would be there.

The officers were nestled
all snug in their beds,
While visions of guns n' stuff
danced in their heads.

With my enthusiasm down,
and my eyes half closed,
I wore a frown on my face
as I plopped down on the floor

When out on the lawn
there arose such a clatter,
I rose off of the rug
to see what was the matter.

Away to the window
I crawled like a rash,
Opened the shutters
and pushed up the sash.

The moon, on the chest
of the new-fallen snow,
Gave the lustre of midday
to the city below.

When, what to my boring
eyes should appear,
But a beat-down old car,
and eight tiny reindeer.

Behind the wheel sat a man with a scar
Looking forced and unwilling
He was driving that car,
without even thinking
It was in that one moment
I decided, not blinking
That the man in the car
Must be ole Scar

Even louder than drums,
that car it did rattle
He forced out a sigh,
and that's when he shouted:

"Now Stupid. Now Moron.
Now Ugly and Worm.
On Reject. On Dummy.
On Retard and Germ.

To the stupid big building
To the chimney over the hall
Now dash away, Dash away,
Dash away all..."

As dry leaves are before
I ignite with my gloves,
They met with no obstacle,
as they gave one good shove.

So up to the roof
the animals they flew,
With a car full of trash,
and Santa Scar too.

And then, in a cloud of black smoke,
I heard on the roof,
The prancing and pawing
of each stupid hoof.

As I drew in my head,
and was turning quite slow,
Down the chimney Scar
came with a loud, thrashing blow.

He was dressed all in red,
from his head to his foot,
And his clothes reaked of foul smells,
like he'd just come from a flood

A bundle of objects
he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler
ripping open his pack.

His eyes - how they darkened.
His expression - how sad.
His cheeks were like toothpaste,
He looked downright mad!

His pale little mouth
was bent down in a frown,
And the scar on his face
seemed unnaturally down.

The flimsy shape of a hat
he had flung on his head,
and you could tell really quick
that the one who had flung it
soon would be dead.

He hated his job
That much was certain,
but why was doing it?
Was it a person?

He was tall and was surly,
angry and sulky,
And I smirked when I saw him,
Oh, what a bully!

A glare of his eyes
and a jerk of his head,
Soon gave me to know
I had far too much to dread.

The saddened man said not a word,
but went straight to work,
And filled all the stockings,
then spun like a jerk.

When casting me one last pissed off look
he shushed me and grimaced
he glared at the fireplace as he tossed me a book
then without even one more small sound,
I thought he shivered in fear, but to the chimney he bound.

I thought he punched some poor bastard out
But that was all that I heard,
that loud thudding sound
Oh, what a shame, that poor little nerd...

Scar dropped into his carseat,
to his team gave a wave of his hand,
And they all drove away
like the slow fall of sand.

But I heard him shout,
as he drove out of sight,
"It's for Christmas you asshole
Have a damn lousy night!"

I blinked but was silent,
and turned back around,
I walked back to the floor
the spot that I'd found.

I looked at the book he'd 'presented' me with
I raised an eyebrow and pondered
it was the one that Fullmetal
said that Hawkeye had wanted!

I thought about the events,
and that Scar had brought gifts
before deciding to do
what I thought was best...

In the morning, would I ever have a story to tell
Alphonse would blink, Fullmetal would laugh,
Hughes would speak of his daughter and Hawkeye would pale
Oh what a fun day I did have in store,
I would enjoy this day known as Christmas for sure!

And, if lucky, maybe I might even
light something on fire!
I could relax and sigh heavy
watch flames burn and admire...

---------- Owari: The End ----------

I do not own The Night Before Christmas or Fullmetal Alchemist. 'The Night Before Christmas - Fullmetal Alchemist Version' was written by Oukaru Hanako in 2005.